Was having a goof the other day with:

Our fantasy football guy, MB, came through with some major bars spat:

Drop some in the comments here on this post if you’re up to it and we will have some laughs. Any hoo! The top 60 outfielders for 2020 fantasy baseball were updated with new projections for a 100-game season. With this series, I will take a look around the 2020 fantasy baseball rankings to see if there’s any differences now that we might only play a 100-game season. Projections have been updated on all my positional rankings. Anyway, here’s thoughts on the top 60 outfielders for 2020 fantasy baseball with the new Corona timeline:

42. Willie Calhoun – Was moved back up in my rankings after I lowered him, due to the broken jaw. One thing the coronavirus has done to baseball players has ensured everyone has time to get healthy. Wait, that makes no sense, yet makes perfect sense. Help, I’ve painted myself into a logic corner.

46. David Dahl – Bit of an explanation on what went on with my projections when they were changed to 100-game projections. Across the board, they were reduced from 162 games to 100, then I went in and jiggered with them. Jigga what? Jigga who? Jigga’d with them. Dahl was one I jiggered. See, his original stats were factoring in around a 120-game season with a lengthy IL stint factored in. Now…Well, I don’t know. These injury-prone guys are gonna be the trickiest. It doesn’t fully follow to say because someone can’t play a full 162-game season that they won’t be able to play a full 100-game season. Sure, it’s possible they will only stay on the field for 70% of the 100-game season, but they also might stay healthy all year, never getting that inevitable injury. This is solely talking about hitters. If pitchers, like Canning, are already complaining of arm problems, those don’t go away. But if a hitter is fully healthy to start the year, you can’t assume they injure their calf or oblique or something in the 1st 100 games. They might, but any hitter might get injured. So, with all that said, Dahl was moved up to near full-time in 100 games. He could absolutely miss forty games out of a 100, but you’re guessing he will, it’s no foregone conclusion.

48. Byron Buxton – …and what I said for Dahl, but I don’t know. It doesn’t feel right to give Buxton a full season of at-bats, but I did give him nearly that and moved him up in the my top 500 and above Tucker (one moment on him), but Buxton’s still not in a tier I’d draft, so this might be academic, but, eff it, anything’s better than pandemic. I will say Buxton’s partial past seasons do give us a solid idea of what to expect from him in only 100 games. I have him down for 49/12/38/.256/12 in 269 ABs and in 2019, when he played in 87 games, he went 48/10/46/.262/14 in 271 ABs. If I had some conjoined cojones (that would give me four balls and a free base), I would move Buxton up in my rankings to a place where I could see drafting him, but I just have no faith in him. The reason why I should be more optimistic is I could see him being the type to steal 15 bags in 30 games, and be way more valuable in a short season. The reason I don’t trust him:  See his past five seasons.

49. Kyle Tucker – …and what I said for Dahl, but opposite. Not saying Tucker will get injured, but I didn’t artificially inflate his projections to give him a full-time season of at-bats in 100 games. I still have no faith in Dusty Baker using a young player for anything but to fetch him some toothpicks. “I said grab some wood, boy!” “Do you mean I should ‘hit the pine’ as in I’m benched, or grab a bat?” “Neither! Grab me a toothpick, and make it mint-flavored!”

54. Andrew McCutchen – Never moved him down when he wasn’t gonna be ready for the start of the season so never moved him back up. You can say I knew all of this was coming which wouldn’t be a lie, I am a time traveler. Which also explains my Member’s Only jacket. Now, excuse me while I go back to 2019 and buy toilet paper.

 
  1. 183414 says:
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    Assuming, which is another way is saying hoping, there is a partial baseball season, that doesn’t factor in the governors of states who won’t be permitting baseball to be played in their states to perhaps 2023. Also doesn’t account for the 15 or more double header games that will go 7 innings, or with rainouts, 5 innings. (or would an official game then be 4 innings).
    That said, with the exception of a few iron men left in the mlb, I think p.t. is a crap shoot.
    Also, what are the dimensions of the 10 parks in Arizona where so many of the games may be played, assuming there are games ?
    What about playing games in states where there are wide open spaces, like Wyoming, Montana, Oklahoma, and the Dakotas. Perhaps Field of Dreams can be played in Iowa, as in the movie, with 1 or 2 families allowed to watch the games.
    Qualcomm is available in San Diego, if I may suggest.
    I wish I could have David Blaine draft my remaining teams.

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      If you build it, they will watch on television!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Ooh, I like the idea of playing all games at Field of Dreams stadium in Iowa and all players enter through corn fields…

      I’m still convinced there will be baseball, but who knows where it will happen — FWIW, Arizona stadiums are not small, but the ball travels well there

      • Donkey Teeth

        Donkey Teeth says:
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        And James Earl Jones announces all games. For Astros games he uses the Darth Vader voice.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Haha, James Earl Jones says every O’s game is like dying again and again in The Lion King

      • lennydykstraisjustkmisunderstood says:
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        that would be cool

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Everything’s on the table, Lenny

          • lennydykstraisjustkmisunderstood says:
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            Is this Heaven? …..No it’s Iowa……….Maybe it is Heaven.

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Haha

      • baby seal says:
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        I like the Field of Dreams idea too!!

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Let’s git r done!

  2. galica says:
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    Grey!

    Awesome top60 report, loved it to bits.

    a. So again none of these guys drafted. Waiting for top80 and top100, please!!!!

    b. My attempt at a ‘@ice cube in lockdown’ couplet…

    Invited for BBQ wings by Busta Rhymes
    Stepped out o’ my ride, no mask, now the Po-Po sending me away for dimes.

    c. MLB quote of the day for June 16, 1983

    ‘Our lives are not determined by what happens to us but how we react to what happens, not by what life brings us but the attitude we bring to life.’

    Wade Anthony Boggs, won four straight batting titles to join only Gwynn, Cobb, Hornsby and Carew.

    d. Have a nice weekend and Happy Easter to those celebrating in the lockdown.

    Cheers,
    Ante

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      B. Ha, nice

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Thanks, Ante!

      A. Yup, we got time!

      B. Haha, nice

      C. First Boggs quote I’ve ever heard that didn’t involve beer and/or chicken

      D. You too!

      • galica says:
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        Grey!!

        a. He came a military family. Discipline was really important. No chance for any negativity.

        b. Hoping for top80 and top100!!

        c. Another icecube lockdown

        To Live in Die in LA
        All I get to hear is Cold Play
        When I bust outta here
        Someone gonna pay!

        Cheers,
        Ante

        • galica says:
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          Grey!!

          So many errors.

          a. He came *from a military family, not as Grimey wanted me to say *on…

          b. To Live *and dIe in LA
          The rest is the same

          Cheers,
          Ante

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          A. Damn, bringing truth

          B. It’ll be next week

          C. HAHA, nice

  3. Sweatpants Nation says:
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    Woke up and put on my sweats
    Thank god I ain’t got no pets
    Same all same all
    Popped me some adderall cuz there ain’t no baseball

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      HAHA, nice

  4. lennydykstraisjustkmisunderstood says:
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    WhuTang Virus don’t infect No Chuck Norris
    Chuck Norris Fuck it over like Scott Boris
    Sat on on the bench and drank me a Corona
    Looks baseball gonna play in Arizonza..

    • Snacks Zillion says:
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      Nice!!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Lenny with the bars

      • lennydykstraisjustkmisunderstood says:
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        Thanks……….good thing typing and spelling don’t count in compton

  5. Steve o says:
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    From 6 feet away that honey had potential
    Shout out from my boss. Good news I’m essential
    Today was a good day

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      HAHA, awesome

    • baby seal says:
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      Haha, good one!

  6. The total deaths today didn’t even top 1K,
    I gotta day it was a good day!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Too Soon, but yet, I laughed…Be safe!

    • baby seal says:
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      haha!

  7. Murph says:
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    Grey+ everyone –
    Check out Bob Nightengale reporting in USA Today…
    Basically – they’re discussing a plan to realign all of baseball into Cactus and Grapefruit leagues… play in AZ and FL… institute DH for all teams… doubleheaders every night… world series in late November!
    Sounds like fun to me!
    Anything to get baseball back!

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      Would be great!

      Seems like Floridas cases are gonna take a bit to peak since their governor waited so long to lock down. Could be a real mess there with all the elderly.

    • Mark Maharaj says:
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      Would kind of be cool and the 30 team tournament is also a great idea.
      A one time thing.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      That works for me, I love it….

  8. William Hung says:
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    These SNY Mets sims are making me depressed for whenever the 2020 season starts – the Mets look awful and are like 4-8 or something with all 4 wins a save situation for Edwin Diaz, whose last save was an adventure – he walked Yelich to load the bases and then got Avisail Garcia to strike out swinging to end it. Familia has like a 10 ERA right now and Alonso is hitting around the mendoza line.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Haha, the Mets unable to even win sims is so Mets

  9. Snacks Zillion says:
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    I am no lyricist put paint a picture of Snacks and Grandpa Donks each with a MLB logo’d N95 face mask and old school Oakland A’s batters helmets on backwards in a drop top 64 Impala with a back seat full of Toilet Paper and booze and some strippers, riding dirty as hell into the sunset. Thats a good day-

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Haha, Snacks! Nice

    • Donkey Teeth

      Donkey Teeth says:
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      Grandpa Donks finally made it into a rap song, check it off the bucket list! Only took him 90 years!

      • Grey

        Grey says:
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        Haha

      • lennydykstraisjustkmisunderstood says:
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        Got Skilz that Kilz in this group………………..

        Maybe Next round we can go country for Grampa Badonka-Donks

        • Snacks Zillion says:
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          Ha!!!!

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Haha

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      But I doubt they actively try to lessen homers in regular season

      • Mark says:
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        Don’t want to be a conspiracy theorist. If MLB was telling the truth, they were making adjustments in 2017 when they took over the making process, and introduced it midway that season, and in 2019 maybe they finished refining the process before the playoffs.

        If MLB was telling the truth in 2017, maybe the new ball is here to stay and we will have less homers. I think the evidence at the end of last year and in the story points to the new ball being in play

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Why would they actively try to get rid of offense? They think offense is good for the game

          • Chucky says:
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            Then they can start each game off with a 10-10 score. Those ‘fans” that MLB is trying to convince, that HRs and more scoring is good for the game, won’t know the difference anyway.

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Yeah, not saying I want it to be true of more offense, but I think MLB does

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      1st one did, thanks!

      • KrazyIvan says:
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        The picture of this man was taken when he recently visited Chernobyl as a tourist. When asked why he came he said he “thought it would be cool and that he had to pickup a crate of Rawlings baseballs that Rob Manfred had sent there last year”.

        Click on continue to website to view if you don’t use Dropbox)

        https://www.dropbox.com/s/2h0vn61et2pxksi/IMG_1123%20%281%29.jpg?dl=0

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Haha

  10. Woolly the Mammoth says:
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    “Shake em up, shake em up, shake em up, shake em,
    Roll em in a very large socially distanced circle of homies and watch me break em.”

    “I had to stop at a red light
    Looking in my mirror and there is Grey Albright
    And everything is alright
    I got a beep from Cougs, and she can cough all night.”

    “Today I didn’t even have to use my N95
    I got to say it was a good day”

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      HAHA, very nice, Wooly — love the opening bars

    • baby seal says:
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      THIS IS THE BEST ONE I’VE READ!

    • lennydykstraisjustkmisunderstood says:
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      Word up

  11. baby seal says:
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    GGGG,

    Jigga wit dem! Hahaha, so good! Happy Friday, bud.

    Somewhere, in a parallel galaxy — far, far away — Grey is cackling about Alonso’s 15 homers to start the first week and a half of the MLB season. Writing, “I TOLD you people draft him, so don’t come crying to me about how CJ Cron is hitting .210 w/ 1 HR, because a bunch of ‘perts said they were the same guy. LOL, NOPE! Any who! Here’s today’s buy column.” THAT MAKES ME SO SAD. BAD SEAL.

    Dahl — agree w/ your take for the most part here. I’m still pretty hesitant to pull the trigger when it comes down to it. As I always say, a lot of players out there to choose from. I’m honesty not sold that he’s the same player he was ~2-3 years ago, and especially the speed may not be there anymore, which is huge for his value.

    Also, the whole Rockies thing you’ve been mentioning regarding if they don’t play there, even if only for a part of the season, is scaring the shit out of me. I know that may not be your intent, but that’s my read on it. Not taking any of them in my ongoing DT and BUNDERSCORE insane slow auctions — until we know more on the season and the specifics. Generally speaking, I’m fairly conservative when it comes to managing these unknown risks. Comes from my day job, I guess.

    Buxton — I just can’t get behind the “wait to draft steals” strategy. You are praying those guys don’t suck or get injured (like Kingery), and THAT’S WHY they are going later. Or someone else may jump their ADP, then you’re left w/ reaching and hoping Berti or some other Hail Mary shot plays every day. Seems like a tall ask. Much prefer my new boy in this range — Bryan Reynolds — if I feel like I’m light on steals… and he’ll give a nice AVG to boot.

    Same idea: straight up — who u taking between Reynolds and Cain? Reynolds for me.

    Tucker — complete avoid for me. Obvious shit is obvious.

    McCutchen — can’t shake this feeling that there’s something really wrong going on w/ his body. Breaking down for some reason. I’ve just been grabbing the other 500 OF in that area. Don’t hate it, though. Guys like this are a mental pretzel for me (is that how u say it?? Sounds wrong, lol) — so I pass. Charlie Munger has a good heuristic for these types of investment decisions that I’ve shared w/ you before–Circle of Competence.

    My next set of ramblings will be sharing the current slow auction I’m in w/ the boys.

    This one is up your alley. 13 teams, 5×5 Roto draft & hold, no bench or waivers, expanded starting rosters.

    Absolutely loving this one. Third draft, so I got this whole auction thing down now, I think (lol). My auction tracking spreadsheet is very robust, finally. Can spin it up for a new draft in just a couple hours. Have a good system to get the player values quickly, have it flow through the workbook, and even built up my own quick-and-dirty Player Rater that I can finagle depending on the crazy league settings DT and B_DON concoct.

    AND, this one is finally a roto draft, so I can lean on all the player research I’ve been doing over the last few months. Don’t have to try and figure out BOTH points and best ball strategies — the changing player values — while also doing my best to not auction like a complete dofus…

    Thanks again for being my writing outlet and mental soundboard. Very grateful for that, because I am certainly mental!

    #SealOut!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Happy Friday, homey!

      Nah, that’s a real concern about the Rockies, I’m trying to scare you!

      Yeah, forget Buxton — he’s a total Donkey Teeth type pick

      Most controversial opinion, Tucker will never play significantly for the Astros

      Yeah, maybe on McCutchen, but 100-game season might help him a little

      Of course, always

      • baby seal says:
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        I appreciate it! No mas Rockies for sealito

        HAHAHA, total DONK move!!
        – His current guy in these drafts is definitely Suarez. Also loves him some Edman. We’re prob going to have a bidding war on him when he gets nominated some time soon.
        – Also looks like he’s going heavy reliever / saves strategy here. He took DeGrom, as Donk does. But I like the price he got, $35. That was one of the values I had him at for this league (once I figure out how to manipulate the auction $s for the league, I always try to run the numbers a few times tweaking some of the assumptions). But my AVG price came out to $31 for him.
        – He’s winning the bids on Hader and Osuna right now — so those would be his first 3 pitchers if it works out.
        – He also tries to get Bellinger ($50) most drafts, got him here too, and has Luis Robert ($16), Mookie ($37), Yordan ($19), and Jason Heyward for a dollar, lol. We’re about 100 players deep right now. Parentheses are the prices he paid — to help give perspective on my guys.

        Gotta feel for Tucker. Guy can’t catch a break, oh well

        <3

        I’ll share the values I had for my guys on your Monday post. Or maybe I’ll swing by here on the weekend if you're around. (You must be around, right?! Haha). For now, will just list what I won them at. I know some guys in the league may read this post…

        PS, before I get into this, think you saw my silly tweet supporting your now defunct Razzball Prospect pod taking down ESPN in the bracket? … LOL, THAT IS SO SAD. For them.

        I explained most of the rules for this thing above. It’s very similar to a regular Roto league. Last thing is the expanded starting roster. 13 teams, $260 each.
        – 2C, 1B, 2B, 3B, SS, 2 MI, 2 CI, 7 OF, 2 U; 13 P; no bench; no WW; no IL slots

        #SquadSoFar

        C: Kelly ($5)
        2B: Hiura ($18)
        3B: McNeil ($12)
        OF: Just Dong ($28)
        OF: Springer ($20)
        OF: Laureano ($14)
        P: Giles ($8)

        In the process of bidding for Bo and Morton. But I don’t NEED those guys. Plenty of both SP and SS still available.

        What do ya think??

        • Coolwhip

          Coolwhip says:
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          Duck Season!

          • baby seal says:
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            Haha, what??

            • Coolwhip

              Coolwhip says:
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              exactly ;-)

              *footnote: see the famous exchange between bugs and daffy

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Donkey will bid up Ohtani and Sale until he owns them, this everyone knows about Donkey

          Tucker won’t ever play as an Astros player — mark my words (unless I’m wrong, then ignore this)

          You should bid on SPs at some point, you need arms — Bo is sexy, but focus on what you need, Baby Seal

          • baby seal says:
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            Not a lot of SP have gone yet!! Mostly hitter nominations. My budget is still in prime condition, baby, no worries. I am top-3 in the league for $ per avail. roster spot currently

            I have a set amount set aside for pitching and I know who I want. I’m fine helping to get as much $ off the table as possible until they get nominated (like w/ Morton)

            Someone bumped me on Bo… to be expected, was sort of planning to grab some lower tiered guys anyways, but worth a shot if u can get a deal…

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Okay, but you still need SPs

              • baby seal says:
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                I WILL REPORT BACK WITH MY SP! hahaha

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  You better!

                  • baby seal says:
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                    HERE I AM, AS PROMISED!

                    #TeamSoFar

                    C: Kelly ($5)
                    C:
                    1B: Bell ($10!)
                    2B: Hiura ($18)
                    3B: Donaldson ($13)
                    SS: Seager ($7)
                    MI: McNeil ($12)
                    MI: Edman ($7) — Donk didn’t put up a fight
                    CI: Turner ($10)
                    CI: Sano ($8!)
                    OF: JD ($28)
                    OF: Springer ($20)
                    OF: Laureano ($14)
                    OF Mercado ($9)
                    OF:
                    OF:
                    OF:
                    U: Cron ($6)
                    U:

                    P: Morton ($18)
                    P: Montas ($13)
                    P: Price ($8!)
                    P: Lamet ($8!)
                    P: Giles ($8)
                    P:
                    P:
                    P:
                    P:
                    P:
                    P:
                    P:
                    P:

                    DO NOT WORRY ABOUT PITCHING YET — I am mid-bid –$4 each for Kela, Odorizzi, and McCullers

                    Wanted Robles for $5, but people are going ham sauce for saves right now. (Draft & Hold)

                    Assuming I get those guys (or someone similar for similar price), that gives me $26 for 10 spots left. Not a lot of $ left out there, so players going for way below value, as highlighted above to some extent.

                    I had Reynolds for $6, and a max bid of $8, but some psycho who has like 9 players and literally no money left (after this), went to $9 on him…. good luck w/ that buddy. For perspective, Kepler and Escobar are about to go for $7. It’s a relative overpay, even though I have him as a $12 player…

                    Anyways! What do you think of the squad? Got some wiggle room still. Where am I weak? Have some ideas and targets in mind.

                    SealOut!

              • Donkey Teeth

                Donkey Teeth says:
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                You don’t need any SPs other than Sale and Ohtani

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  Donkey is the only one rooting for the next two seasons to be cancelled and using his 2020 rosters in 2022

                  • Donkey Teeth

                    Donkey Teeth says:
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                    I figured that was what would happen when we were drafting back in November. Pretty obvious.

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      You absolute psychic!

                • baby seal says:
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                  Hahahaha, very true!!

  12. Ryan741 says:
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    Grey,

    Need a trade opinion in a H2H points league since we have all the time in the world to look at deals…. was offered Castillo/Ryu/Robbie Ray/Sano for Scherzer/Woodruff/Marquez/Dustin May. Would Marquez get moved up in your ranks with the possibility of fewer games in Coors, maybe into your top 40 for SP?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Yeah< Marquez would be moved up if no Coors games -- Castillo side, but it's fair, the end of the deal with Ray/Sano changes it for that side

    • baby seal says:
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      Yeah, it’s fair. Really comes down to if you need Sano? Otherwise, it’s a pretty obvious pitching downgrade.

      Personally, don’t love Ray. Would try to take him out for someone else, or to remove one of the guys on your side that you like, to keep him on your team.

      Maybe try to keep Woodruff on your side. His value should go up a lot in a shortened season. Ray could be a ratio murderer. Ryu is fine but doesn’t excite me too much. I like the swap of Castillo for Scherz (assuming you make up the value diff w/ e.g. a Sano). But again, Scherz probably gains value now. Dustin likely loses value, so I’d trade him. Marquez is a total wildcard, so fine w/ getting rid of him too.

      Hope that helps!

  13. MB

    MB says:
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    Features available. Soundcloud link in the bio

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      HAHA

  14. The Great Knoche says:
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    Who you got in the MLB 20 the Show players league? I’m going Dahl and McCullers. More time to practice last year.

    Jon Duplantier – Arizona Diamondbacks
    Luke Jackson – Atlanta Braves
    Dwight Smith Jr. – Baltimore Orioles
    Eduardo Rodriguez – Boston Red Sox
    Ian Happ – Chicago Cubs
    Lucas Giolito – Chicago White Sox
    Amir Garrett – Cincinnati Red
    Carlos Santana – Cleveland Reds
    David Dahl – Colorado Rockies
    Niko Goodrum – Detroit Tigers
    Lance McCullers Jr. – Houston Astros
    Brett Phillips – Kansas City Royals
    Ty Buttrey – Los Angeles Angels
    Gavin Lux – Los Angeles Dodgers
    Ryan Stanek – Miami Marlins
    Josh Hader – Milwaukee Brewers
    Trevor May – Minnesota Twins
    Jeff McNeil – New York Mets
    Tommy Kahnle – New York Yankees
    Jesus Luzardo – Oakland Athletics
    Rhys Hoskins – Philadelphia Phillies
    Cole Tucker – Pittsburgh Pirates
    Fernando Tatis Jr. – San Diego Padres
    Hunter Pence – San Francisco Giants
    Carl Edwards Jr. – Seattle Mariners
    Matt Carpenter – St. Louis Cardinals
    Blake Snell – Tampa Bay Rays
    Joey Gallo – Texas Rangers
    Bo Bichette – Toronto Blue Jays
    Juan Soto – Washinton Nationals

    • Coolwhip

      Coolwhip says:
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      Maybe Tatis or Bichette, the league hasn’t had a chance to adjust to them yet ;-)

      • baby seal says:
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        I would love for Soto to crush it!!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Prolly smart move by the Dodgers to not choose David Price with his Fortnite history

      Also, how Pirates is it for them to choose someone who is not even on their MLB roster?

      • Coolwhip

        Coolwhip says:
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        LOL such a Pirates move… or maybe trade away their best gamer and in return get a vet thats never played the Show, then send him out there to pitch to contact.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Haha, “wow, weird move but Pirates are sending Juan Uribe out for their video game challenge”

          • The Great Knoche says:
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            This just in the Bucs have re-added Felipe Vasquez to their active 40 man roster in order to compete.

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              HAHA, I mean WOOF, but likely too

              • The Great Knoche says:
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                Also I think the tweet later should read “What are the odds David Dahl injures himself playing in the MLB 20 The Show players league”

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  Haha, of course he will injure himself — Also, Rhys Hoskins will disappoint — sorry, truthers

      • baby seal says:
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        lololol

  15. baby seal says:
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    Here’s my rhyming attempt:

    Relax and stay woke!
    While I take notes on the Trump scapegoats
    Throw you in vote–misquote, misquote
    Biggie Smalls for Mayor, the Corona Slayer, the Purell Player
    Motherfucker, say your prayers!
    “Hail Mary, full of grace–” smack the bitch with a bar of soap
    Take her N95 mask and the suicide note
    Jab her if she act funny and her nose runny
    Oh, you got the hush money?
    I don’t wanna date ya, I just want the bean capers
    The hospital skyscrapers? I’m out like the newspapers
    Who’s the you call Mr. Vaccinated?
    My antibodies acclimated; a pill now encapsulated
    I got so much Rona, I should be in Barcelona
    “Make up to break up,” y’all need to spray up
    Smell the Lysol, beat you to a crawl
    Then fuck your moms, beat her with a baseball
    She don’t remember shit, just the two hits
    Her hittin’ the floor, and me with no quits (yeah)
    Her legs completely split, still got my wits
    And your moms ain’t ugly, love, I finished quick
    I guess I was a combination of Baby Seal and Grey Albright
    I was messin’ around and thinkin’ out loud
    Smacked her, then, I asked her, “Who’s the Baby Seal?” (Mmm)
    She said, the one who keeps it real
    (Yo, Grey, you’re dead wrong!)

    • baby seal says:
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      should be *Baby Seal for Mayor* haha

      • baby seal says:
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        Also typo:

        Who’s the *one you call Mr. Vaccinated?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          MC Misspelling

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      HAHA, wait, WUT — Baby Seal, you have more rhymes than rhyming dictionary dot com

      • baby seal says:
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        HAHAHA, not going to lie, very happy with myself on that one

  16. SwaggerJackers says:
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    Jokes about Dusty’s toothpicks will never get old. Keep them coming.

    Thoughts on this H2H 12 teamer? (OBP + Save/holds)

    C Will Smith
    1B Alonso
    2B Muncy
    3B Chapman
    SS T Turner
    1B/3B Mous
    2B/SS Edman
    OF1 Acuna
    OF2 Soler
    OF3 Franmil
    OF4 Mercado
    OF5 G Polanco
    UT Yordan
    Bench Happ
    SP1 G Cole
    SP2 Castillo
    SP3 Darvish
    SP4 Sonny
    SP5 Lamet
    SP6 Maeda
    RP Ottavino
    RP Pagan
    RP Bummer
    Bench SP Hendricks
    Bench SP Stroman
    Bench SP Gallen
    Bench SP Civale

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Strangely enough, Dusty toothpicks never get old either, they’re metal

      I like the hitting a lot, but your pitching is really where this team excels…Cole, Castillo, Yu, Sonny…You have four aces — If I had to nitpick, you could’ve done with one less ace and grabbed a better OF do you didn’t own Polanco

      • SwaggerJackers says:
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        Thanks! Like all of us impatiently waiting for baseball, I’d love to see this team accumulate some real stats.

        Agreed on Polanco. He’ll get the boot in short order once meaningful rosterbating kicks in.

        Speaking of which, I dumped Happ for Wander Franco as a dart throw in case something weird happens with expanded rosters and he’s up to start, or shortly after.

        • 183414 says:
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          I’d certainly pick up Happ back for Polanco. Yordan will qualify at o.f. within a month after season starts.

          • Grey

            Grey says:
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            Agree with this too, Happ over Polanco — even if you might drop Happ later

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Yeah, Polanco is 1st one to go, but there should be plenty of options, so that’s good

          I don’t mind the Wander dart throw right now

  17. 183414 says:
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    12 team league and you have Acuna, Turner, Cole, Alonso, Yordan, Castillo, Darvisk, Soler, Mous, Muncy, and Chapman.
    How much money will you win ? I can say w/out any doubt, that no one would ever get close to drafting a team like that, nowhere close, at NFBC.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Who’s this now?

    • baby seal says:
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      Everyone should pack it up and go home if there’s a team like that in their league, lol

      • SwaggerJackers says:
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        I hope it’s that easy, Baby Seal. But things rarely go according to plan in H2H. This short season will undoubtedly make things even more unpredictable.

        • baby seal says:
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          Did everyone fall asleep at the draft table?? How do you get Cole, Turner, Acuna on the same team? Those guys are all top-10 picks… I wouldn’t even cheat that much on my PS4, when I was 13, lol

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Totes

    • SwaggerJackers says:
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      It’s a keeper league so my keepers were Cole, Acuna, Turner, and Alonso. We also do draft pick trades so I was able to flip Buehler, Realmuto, and Devers for picks.

      • baby seal says:
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        AH, didn’t see that before, clearly. I was going to say, that’s the only way it makes any sense…

        Shortened season or not, your chances of winning are extraordinarily high. Of course, anything can happen. Seems like you completely punted saves. Totally fine in H2H — but maybe you could compete there w/ trades? Seems like it may not be worth it though, actually. Nice job, man!!

        • SwaggerJackers says:
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          Yeah, those keepers made a huge difference.

          As far as the save situation – This league uses holds instead of saves so I can compete in that category without actual closers. I haven’t drafted a true closer in years. I tend to rotate through middle relievers until I can hit on one that has the right mix of opportunity and ratios.

      • Grey

        Grey says:
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        Ah, nice

  18. KrazyIvan says:
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    Latest proposal is a Cactus and Grapefruit League. Three divisions in each and AL/NL teams mixed together. Grapefruit is stacked with 7/10 of last years playoffs (Everyone but Dodgers, Brewers/A’s). DH for all.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Dodgers about to have a walk to World Series again

    • 183414 says:
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      What a joke.

      • KrazyIvan says:
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        I think it would be worth it just to see some baseball again (and to see who the Pirates would DH with the whole season).

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Haha…what’s Ryan Doumit up to?

  19. thehombre says:
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    Asked Fauci, when we hitting juiced balls?
    Looking forward to umps making bad calls
    Albombso blasting in an instance
    Showing us 465 feet of social distance
    Mondesi about to steal home on a dare
    Crazy Biden trying to smell all of Greys hair
    Franmil entering the season with so much drip
    Hurry. Let’s start. I’m gonna spank CoolWhip.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Hahaha…you the man, thehombre!

      • thehombre says:
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        Putting my cig out in Arenados ash tray
        Today was a good day

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Haha, why do you have Arenado’s ashtray?

  20. Gator says:
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    Who do you like better for 2021 – Urias or Luzardo? Thanks

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Urias

      • Gator says:
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        Thanks. Appreciate it.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          No problem

  21. Trader says:
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    12 team, h2h. 19 cats punting saves for now. Depending upon playoff matchups, acquiring RP help late is not hard in this league.
    Hitting: Runs, RBI, SB, Ave., Ks, BB, 1B, 2B, 3B, HR
    Pitch: W, L, Ks, HRs, WHIP, ERA, Saves, Holds, QS

    Ramos
    Olsen, Suarez, Ramirez
    Moose, Rosario, Polanco
    Trout, Stanton, Gurriel Jr, JD Davis, Verdugo
    Util: Rendon
    Bench: Canha, Urshela, Berti
    SP: Giolito, Glasnow, Ryu, CMart, Stroman, Pineda
    RP: Lugo, Britton, Ottavino

    1. Too many bench bats? Which one would you trade and what area would you trade for?

    2. With 12 being the best, please rank this squad 1-12.

    Any other critiques welcomed!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      1. Yeah, but what can you trade these guys for? They’re platoon players 2. 10 — it’s a solid team, better than the last one I saw from you

      • Trader says:
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        Thank you. I now have four teams in this strange format. That last team you saw blows! That is gonna take work.

        First team was the best. This one above I I think has potential. Should be fun!

        So let’s okay ball

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Haha yup!

  22. Eli Man Penguin Boy says:
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    16 team keep 4 (previous season’s ADP prices) h2h. OBP over AVG, total bases/OPS added and hits, net steals over steals
    C
    1B bellinger (K)
    2B antana (qualifies everywhere needed some steals here, 2B guys falling off fast
    SS correa (sick value for OPS/total bases/hits league where i got him)
    3B
    LF soto (K)
    CF
    RF yelich (K)
    OF ozuna
    util (2) otani (both)
    BN
    SP (want 8 with one of them streamer): woodruff, otani, carrasco
    RP (6): iglesias (going closer 2 next pick not this pick)

    go kingery or jd davis here, i know where they are ranked but for this build with those settings. jd davis appears ahead in TB/OPS, and i could target one of more of these later (plus i got a lot of medium steals guys, no completely dead ones already, esp with new HOU manager, correa isn’t old and might finally steal again), buxton, newman, goodrum, wong, cain, dyson, mallex, dubon, pillar later. but outside of buxton/wong these guys aren’t good for a league like this, it hurts you in even more categories. i doubt the other one is around by my next pick (and budget says to go RP there anyway), plus this is 10th round, i got otani in the 11th so i won’t pick for a while.

    • Eli Man Penguin Boy says:
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      otani was the 4th keeper, this isn’t yahoo so i have both of him for one price.

      • Eli Man Penguin Boy says:
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        or mcmahon could go him too (doubt i’ll pay the hampson price so i can’t tag team them, that IS an idea i’m going to attempt in another league though with far less starting hitter slots, so i won’t be screwed going OF 3 later)

        – b.reynolds is also out there, but due to having no 3B yet i’m pretty sure i gotta target that here as tons of guys aren’t around by now.

        • Eli Man Penguin Boy says:
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          andujar (3B in fantrax, him and k.davis (LF) have more stuff there than even yahoo, which is weird since almost every other player has more stuff if possible from yahoo to fantrax than those 2) is an option, IF i trusted NYY to not be stupid with his playing time, which i don’t.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Davis

  23. Anti-Scioscia Disorder says:
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    Rollin’down the street with my mask on;
    Pickin’ up gin n juice
    Cloth mask
    Got my mind on my groceries and my groceries on my mind

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Haha

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