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Please see our player page for Triston McKenzie to see projections for today, the next 7 days and rest of season as well as stats and gamelogs designed with the fantasy baseball player in mind.

Emerging from your mother’s basement after six months, “I did it! I won my fantasy baseball league!” It begins to dawn on you that the world no longer looks as you remember it. Where there were once blossoming trees, there’s now decaying branches. Where flowers once sprouted, shriveled vines remained. A tumbleweed blows past. Minutes later, back in your mother’s basement, you’ve painted a face on the tumbleweed and you say to it, “Can you believe I won my league by two points?” After a brief pause, you say, “Do you think I should keep Christian Encarnacion-Strand in an 11-team keeper league with no restrictions? Mr. Tumbleweed, I’m asking you a question.” On a serious note, as many of you know, I started Razzball during the WGA strike of 2007-08, because I was laid off from a job and didn’t have shizz to do. (Since it is invariably asked, I was working with a Zucker brother of Airplane/Naked Gun fame.) This summer with the WGA strike happening again, I was reminded how lucky I am to have this gig, talking about fantasy baseball and just generally goofing off with all of you. Thank you for another great year! (Crazy that those trees were decaying and I still got some freakin’ sap!) Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I suppose if we’re being alphabetical, this is week Y. If you’re a Rush fan, consider it like YYZ. I mean, I think airports are chaotic polyrhythms too.

There’s a lesson to be learned here: It’s not the stimulus, but the response. You can’t control everything. What you can control, is your response to stimulus. Maybe you’re in a chaotic airport — how do you keep your cool and have a fun flight when a bar tab costs $90? Or maybe you’re listening to a track in 5/4 — what do you do with that extra information?

Or maybe — just maybe — you’re in the championship week of your fantasy baseball league. I hope you are.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Are the Rangers the American League’s answer to the Braves? In this Ted Talk, he will discuss…*nudges my dog, Ted, to talk*…Go ahead, boy, say something. C’mon, stop humping! Oh, are you doing that as a nod to Semien? You are so clever! Just like me for drafting Marcus Semien (2-for-4, 26th and 27th homers)! What’s that, boy? What does attacking the mailman mean? The mailman’s name is Garcia? Oh, wow, for Adolis Garcia (1-for-4, 36th homer)! Jesus, you are so unbelievable! Okay, what are you doing for Corey Seager (1-for-3, 2 RBIs, 33rd homer)? *Ted does nothing* C’mon, boy, I’m bored…Bored…Borey…Corey! Wow, my dog is so smart! There’s no one smarter, is there boy? Wait a minute, smarter…Evan Carter (1-for-4, 2 RBIs, 4th homer)! Okay, let’s see what you have for Leody (2-for-3, 2 runs, 2 RBIs, 13th homer). *Ted joins a cult* Wow, brilliant! Thanks for joining me for my Ted Talk! Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

It’s everything you’ve been waiting for: the moment that EverywhereBlair surpasses Kerry Klug on the Razzball Baseball all-time poster leaderboard. I’ve already left Donkey Teeth and RotoWan in the dust this year. Today, I stand in front of Kerry Klug’s fantasy blogging grave and wave my Minnesota Twins hat in his face. Thanks to everybody who keeps showing up, even when the fantasy season is donezo for 95% of you. 

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Greetings and salutations, Razzballers! Can you believe the All-Star Break is in two weeks (either because this season has felt immensely short or long)? Speaking of the All-Star Break, was there anyone you hoped to see or are surprised to see? Aaron Judge is, forever, on the All-Star roster. I wrote a quick blurb below […]

Please, blog, may I have some more?

We’re nearing the All-Star Break! There’s only 1 week of half-assed work before our national (pronounce that with a long “a”) BBQ and then some recovery days. Then it’s everything we’ve been waiting for: the Home Run Derby! Also the All-Star game, but who actually cares for that anymore. 

Why do I talk about the All-Star Break two weeks before it’s happening? Because this Week 13 marks the ACKSHUAL halfway point of the MLB season. A little bit more than a month left until the MLB trade deadline — and probably your fantasy baseball trade deadline as well. I almost wrote “fantasy football” in that last sentence because many multi-sport managers are turning their attention to another sport entirely. If you’re a bold one, make your fantasy baseball trades now before Tommy from HR is debating whether to draft Bijan Robinson in the first round. 

Please, blog, may I have some more?

14.4% walk rate. That stands out as the difference between young players, who have promise, and what Gunnar Henderson (3-for-5, 2 runs, 3 RBIs and his 9th homer) has done. Thinking back to when Keston Hiura appeared to be a top prospect. He flamed out with a walk rate half of Gunnar’s. Gunnar Henderson just went through conceivably the most difficult stretch of his young career, and did it with a 14.4% walk rate. That’s remarkable. Most vets can’t do that. It’s common sense: A player struggles and starts swinging at everything and spirals out of control until they’re asking, “Is the whole team going to Golden Corral tonight?” as they stand in line for minor league meal vouchers. Yesterday, Gunnar hit the longest home run in Camden Yards history; it reached the street, then rolled to Hamsterdam. Since June, he’s hit .458 with four homers. He has a higher OPS than Kyle Tucker, Schwarber, Jul-Rod and Machado, to name a few. In the last month, he’s hitting near-.300 with a .265 ISO. To me, the most impressive number is still 14.4%. Gunnar sounds like a viking backwards and forwards, and you Cnut ask for more. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Yesterday, the Dodgers called up Jonny DeLuca. He’s been tearing up Triple-A, which is pretty impressive for a studio enforcer who’s having an affair with Lana Turner. Jonny DeLuca’s got all the photogs on call, and, yeah, see, he’s got pics of your favorite movie stars in ways you don’t wanna see them, see. He’s also got solid power and speed, and had a 15% strikeout rate in Triple-A, so the contact is there too. Think he might be more of an NL-Only or deeper mixed league guy for now, but worth monocling. Unless you wanna see your dame splashed all over Look! magazine. Also, the Cards are calling up Luken Baker, but, if you’ve seen him, he looks exactly like Adam Dunn. In the minors, he even wore his number.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Playing fantasy baseball with Andrew Heaney on your team is like getting cozy with a heating pad as you fall asleep, and every five days that heating pad will keep you a perfect 73 degrees, but, once in a while, it will unexpectedly become 212 degrees. At first, you’re having a nightmare where your blood starts boiling, and you sleepwalk out of bed, grab a box of dry pasta from the cabinet and boil the pasta in your blood. That’s once in a while. Not yesterday for Andrew Heaney! Yesterday, Andrew Heaney (5 IP, 0 ER, 4 baserunners, 10 Ks, ERA at 8.22) made good on his promise from last year. Maybe he was visited by the Dodgers’ pitching pixies in the pregame to remind him what he was supposed to do. Maybe it was just the better matchup. Whatever it was, it worked. He cut his walks, and showed why he’s so tantalizing with his strikeout rate now up to 14.1 K/9. I’m such a sucker for this guy hopefully I’m not trying to boil fusilli in my blood next time out. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?