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At one point in the 6th inning, Michael Kopech (7 IP, 0 ER, 3 baserunners, 9 Ks, ERA at 4.24) couldn’t see. He was blinded by a bug. The pitch clock was winding down, so he let it rip, and he said later, “I still don’t know where that pitch was that I threw. It was a strike, so it’s good. Seby [Zavala] came out and actually blew in my eye and got the bug out.” That bug, Flik, was voiced by Canadian heartthrob, Dave Foley. I don’t know how long Dave Foley’s been sitting in Kopech’s eye, but, with the success he’s been having recently, made we shouldn’t be so fast to blow our hot breath into his face, unless it was meant as an ode to Prom season by Seby. That is always worth commemorating. So, I try avoid doing a lede about the same guy but, way back in the first week of the season, I wrote about Michael Kopech because he looked so bad. Well, not exactly. I wrote, “There’s no direct evidence that the more handsome a pitcher, the more he’s going to screw you over — that we know of. We just haven’t studied it yet! Someone take a ruler and measure the distance between the eyes on Michael Kopech. Now measure the inches on his curve break. Do they match? The golden ratio that is his cheekbones, is that equal to his current 13.50 ERA? This is not eugenics, because we’re doing it for fantasy baseball purposes and not fantasy exterminations.” And that’s me quoting me! Well, we’re back here again, because we have to keep an open mind — someone grab me the head opener! — and Michael Kopech now has two great starts in a row. Since that first game of the season, Kopech only really has one other disaster. His velocity is up; his strikeouts are up; his command is better (in his last two starts) and, while not exactly performing at the level of his last two starts without luck — he needs to disallow homers on the reg — he’s looking more inline with the starter who we thought was going to be back when he was a top prospect. Was thought to be a slider-first pitcher, he’s relied on it less, while throwing it harder. It could be the recipe for success he needs. Either that, or someone put a bug back in his eye. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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See all of today’s starting lineups

# MLB Starting Lineups For Wed 8/6
ARI | ATH | ATL | BAL | BOS | CHC | CHW | CIN | CLE | COL | HOU | KC | LAA | LAD | MIA | MIL | MIN | NYM | NYY | PHI | PIT | SD | SEA | SF | STL | TB | TEX | TOR | WSH | DET | OAK

The guidelines that built this team are pretty fluid, but in a general sense, a player must have significantly enhanced his dynasty profile to qualify. 

Catcher

Orioles C Samuel Basallo has slowed down some since a steamy start but is still slashing .299/.340/.489 with four home runs and two steals as an 18-year-old in Low-A. He looks solid behind the plate, too, especially for a 6’3” teenager. 

Honorable Mentions: Dodgers C Thayron Liranzo. One way to identify a player like this is the ratio of relevance to league-size is changing in a hurry on the fly. Though I’ve added him elsewhere, I’ve mostly ignored Liranzo in my 15-teamer with 20 milb spots per team. This week, I saw his name in some tweets. On May 21, he hit his 10th and 11th home runs on the season. He’s slashing .310/.444/.690 in the month of May with 14 walks and 18 strikeouts in 16 games. Still just a catching prospect in Low-A, but he’ll be off the board in most leagues before long. 

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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“Owen, you stupid poop!” is a line from Throw Momma From The Train, but is not a line you’re going to hear at Brewers games. Unless it’s in this context, “Owen, you stupid poop, but ‘stupid’ as in ‘fresh’ or ‘dope’ and ‘dope’ as in great not as in dumb, and ‘poop’ as in you’re the shizz.” Somehow, I haven’t mentioned Owen Miller (3-for-4, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and a slam (3) and legs (5), hitting .347) much. Well, I’ve got Miller fatigue, okay? And ‘fatigue’ is Italian, pronounced fah-tee-gay. I’ve mentioned many Millers — Shelby, Bryce, Mason, Bobby — but not Owen. He’s been playing 3rd every day for the Brewers, and should continue until Urias returns. He’s also got 15/15 potential with an insanely low strikeout rate. Prolly more of an NL-Only guy, but could see him paying dividends in 15-teamers or HTMLers. Get it? Div id ends? No? Okay. I don’t really get it either. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Who doesn’t need a friendly pat on the back once and a while? I mean, I pat myself on the back all the time! With life, it’s the little things (that’s what she said.) And so in terms of Dane Dunning, so far so good. And that’s definitely not sarcasm now roughly a quarter way […]

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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Astros’ lineup has some 80’s WWF vibes to it. Julks-Dubon being led by Captain Woo Cubano. Can’t forget, Jose Abreu (2-for-5, 2 run) at the plate as threatening as Cyndi Lauper when she’s beating on Captain Lou’s chest in the Girls Just Wanna Fun video. Or The Fabulous Martin Maldonado went 2-for-3, 2 runs with his 3rd homer. All they needed was Manaea to come through with Afa and Sika. By the way, what’s less pro wrestling than losing your acronym, WWF, to the World Wildlife Federation. First up, Mauricio Dubon went 1-for-4, 2 runs and his 1st homer. Altuve owners are Stan Gable yelling, “Hey, that’s my pie!” Then Corey Julks went 3-for-5, 3 RBIs, hitting his 3rd homer. But, leading the way, was Yordan Alvarez. Captain Woo Cubano went 3-for-4, 3 runs, 5 RBIs and his 11th and 12th homer, hitting .305. Woo has no speed and doesn’t seem like he’s been hot at any moment this year, and is still around a top 15 hitter on the year on the Player Rater. Truly one of the best and gets nowhere near enough acclaim. Or as Rowdy Tellez would say acc’laim. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

It’s nearly freaking Memorial Day, folx! I finally relented on No Mow May today and sheered about 8 million dandelions from my backyard. Do you know the meaning of “deadhead”? Other than being one of the greatest Devin Townsend songs. Oh, and that other band with Jerry Garcia. Oh, and the trucker slang. That’s right — the fourth guess did the trick! It’s when you pop the head off a dandelion. I suppose you could do this maliciously while cackling, but I do it with a lawnmower that dates to the 1980s. Have I succeeded in giving you a feeling that my life is ultra-exciting like Grey’s? 

And now, much like Grey, let’s see if we can save your fantasy baseball team as it heads into the 1/3 mark of the season. 

Please, blog, may I have some more?