On Christmas day, 2009, the Mets signed an obscure knuckleballer named R.A. Dickey. The cynical Mets’ fans whispered to each other that the Wilpon family, owners of the franchise, were broke, as a result of the Bernie Madoff scandal, and all they could afford to sign was a mediocre 35 year old career nomad, who […]
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Much to the chagrin of Mother Nature, I survived what shall be known forth as Thundermageddon. We seldom see many asteroids or Bruce Willis kicking their butt around the District of Columbia, but, nonetheless, we seem prone to naming any unexpected negative life-altering event by attaching ‘mageddon’ to the end of it. When the metro […]
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How did baseball survive over two months without a Boston/New York match-up? It’s barely a rivalry these days as the Yankees took an 8 1/2 game lead over the Red Sox with the big win last night. It was your typical NY/BOS game, i.e., nearly 4 hours long, 18 runs scored, 28 hits, and plenty […]
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Tyler Colvin Presents “House of Coors”
July 6, 2012 | Fantasy Baseball Buy/Sell | 449 Commentsby: Grey
Picture above ground, there’s different levels of air. In the first level of air, there’s number one outfielders. Ryan Braun, he’s a number one. He’s like a Macy’s Day Parade balloon, big and just off the ground. Then in the next level of air, there’s number two outfielders. We’re right above the world’s tallest buildings […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Phils decided they wanted to get younger for Friday’s game so they’re bringing up this guy from the minors. They say he’s got good power, but he’s been playing first base on a foot stool. At least they could’ve got Ryan Howard one of those giant Rawlings glove bean bags. So Howard’s Achilles is better, […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Nick Altrock was arguably one of the best southpaws in baseball at one time, but a love for malt liquor, and a happy-go-lucky attitude, contributed to his increasing ineffectiveness. Several years after being the hero of the World Series, he found himself struggling in the Minors. Clark Griffith, owner/Manager of the Washington Senators, picked up […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? Mariners Lineup Fails To Show Up In CT Scan
July 5, 2012 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 371 Commentsby: Grey
“That guy looks vaguely familiar.” “Which guy?” “That guy on the mound.” “The Chris Tillman fella?” “Yeah.” “Did he used to serve us coffee at the Blue Danube?” “I don’t think so. That guy’s name was Ronnie. And he had dreads.” “But he was white.” “Yeah, Ronnie was a white guy with dreads. He looked […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? The Razzball Podcast — The One With The Siamese Beaver
July 4, 2012 | All Podcasts | 122 Commentsby: Grey
We talk at length about Tim Lincecum and Roy Oswalt. Then the Brandon Belt subject hits and I lose my cool with Bruce Bochy. Someone needs to shake some sense into that man’s ginormous head! Why can’t they just give Belt a shot? Did Belt make some crack directed towards Bochy that he couldn’t see […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? Today Is Our Independence Day From Tim Lincecum
July 4, 2012 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 139 Commentsby: Grey
Tim Lincecum has a 6.07 ERA. Seriously, we’re in July and Lincecum’s ERA is six point oh seven. There’s ugly. There’s brutal. There’s murderous. There’s the guy with the goiter down the street from you that you talked to at a red light once and now he wants to hang out. There’s what your mother did […]
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Pitcher Profile: Carlos Zambrano is Again a Big Zzzzzz
July 3, 2012 | Pitcher Profiles | 11 Commentsby: JB Gilpin
Heading into this fantasy season, Carlos Zambrano had all the momentum of three red bulls and a pot of coffee. Flashing a high K-rate in Spring Training and a change of scenery to the flamboyant Marlins Park had a lot of sleeper buzz going around the water cooler. And, for the first month and a […]
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The Fugs (Epic Beardmen Division) regained top spot in the Master standings, moving up 5 positions with help from a pitching staff that recorded a 1.70 ERA and 0.91 WHIP. Yovani Gallardo and Madison Bumgarner paced The Fugs, while Gio Gonzalez added 2 wins despite throwing only 11 innings and giving up 8 runs. captainpyper […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?The Pirates announced the time is nigh for Starling Marte. The Pirates equipment manager, Buffalo Bill, has to start making a uniform made from Jose Tabata’s skin. Put the lotion in the basket, Tabata! Tabata, “I wanna go home!” You won’t go home, ever. Because you never get on base, that’s the first step to going […]
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