Adam Eaton went 2-for-6 with a run yesterday as the Diamondbacks called up their outfield prospect, and hit him leadoff. The move is to fill in for Krispie, who’s out with a sore quad. Krispie could return (he won’t go to the DL because with 40-man rosters, there’s no need to), but Eaton’s not coming up to play in one game a week. The Diamondbacks are taking a look at players. Getting them on the ol’ catwalk (hey, I can’t forget our 4 female readers). To give you the brief summary up front about Eaton: Imagine Pedroia in the outfield with more speed and less power. He’s got spark plug written all over him (in invisible ink, so not to creep anyone out). At five foot-eight soaking wet, he’s not the biggest of players. (“Soaking wet” doesn’t add much to people’s height, but it’s also not inaccurate. If you don’t believe me, measure yourself in and out of the shower.) But you can’t weigh a guy’s heart on a scale. Unless he has a baboon heart and is portrayed by Christian Slater. In the minors this year, Eaton had 44 steals and only 11 times caught. He also maintained a .375 average between Double and Triple-A, with a .456 OBP. A lot of that was due to a high BABIP, but with his speed that shouldn’t be a huge concern. Scrappy is Eaton’s middle name. The S is silent in most shallower mixed leagues. But where you need steals, he’s a good guy to get to know. Plus, at his size, getting to know him won’t cost you an arm and leg. Anyway, here’s what else we saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Psyche! Before we get into the roundup, I just wanted to announce that this afternoon’s podcast has a special guest…One of the stars of the show, Breaking Bad. Yeah, sook-sook, on that, so check back later. Anyway II, here’s the roundup:
Aaron Hill – 5-for-5, 3 runs, 2 RBIs and a triple short of the cycle. He’s on pace to finish top 3 4 among all MIs on our fantasy baseball player rater. Cano, Hanley, him and Kinsler. One of those guys doesn’t belong. If you guessed Hill, you’re correct. If you said Kinsler because he’s Jewish, shame on you. Unless you’re Jewish.
Mark Reynolds – 3-for-4, 2 runs, 4 RBIs and another homer. Solid when locked in, but you’re probably going to get a few 0-for-4’s with 3 Ks sprinkled in. That’s the Reynolds rap.
Zach Britton – 7 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 8 Ks vs. the Blue Jays. Yeah, it’s easy when you don’t have to face Mark Reynolds. The Jays have now scored more than four runs only four times since July. With the Red Sox lineup looking like the 1927 Padres and the Blue Jays looking like “pitch around Edwin and it’s clear sailing,” who to stream against in the AL East is getting flipped on its head. Stream-o-Nator, “Don’t worry, Number Five is ALIVE.”
Desmond Jennings – 1-for-3, 2 runs and a slam (12) and legs (25). Jennings and B.J. went back-to-back in the fifth inning. (Skip to next blurb if you don’t want to see what a baseball nerd I am; actually, forget it, probably too late.) You ever notice how box scores specify back-to-back homers? Is there a reason? Does this add anything to your reading of the box score? It’s like they designed the box score with the hometown announcers and SportsCenter anchors in mind. Those are the only people who seem to give a rat’s ass about back-to-back homers. You know a box score addition I would like to see? When inherited runs are scored. I’d love to quickly be able to see if a reliever gave up two runs that was tacked onto the starter’s line. Also, I’d love to be able to track that as a stat, right there next to their ER — the Inherited Runs Scored! IRS, starter’s taxes paid for having a lousy bullpen.
Evan Longoria – 1-for-3, 2 RBIs and his 10th homer. Just eight more homers this year and we’re cool.
Alex Cobb – 7 IP, 2 ER, 5 baserunners, 5 Ks vs. the Yankees. Is it possible to like a full AL pitching staff next year for fantasy? Depending on where they go, I might be back in on Shields, in for the first time on Hellickson and liking Cobb with his 3.50-ish xFIP. (Price and Moore go without saying, except to say them while saying they don’t need to be said.)
Fernando Rodney – Recorded his 42nd save and lowered his ERA to 0.71. Vegas wouldn’t have even taken the bet “Rodney’s ERA less than 0.75” because the odds would’ve bankrupted the casino.
Jeremy Guthrie – 7 IP, 2 ER, 7 baserunners, 5 Ks. Won against Texas for his 6th Quality Start in his last seven. Perhaps KC can be the halfway house for abused Rockie pitchers and the Royals can send slumping hitters *cough* Hosmer *cough* to Colorado.
Alex Gordon – 2-for-4 with his 11th homer. That’s awesome (for a light-hitting middle infielder).
Ryan Doumit – 3-for-5, 3 runs, 3 RBIs with a homer while playing the outfield with catcher eligibility. Somewhere, Craig A. Wilson is smiling.
Chris Parmelee – 1-for-4, 2 runs, 4 RBIs and his 3rd homer in the last four games. So that’s where Ruggiano’s hot streak has gone! He gave it to his brother in cheese. Parmelee had 17 homers in 64 games in Triple-A this year and he showed he could hit in the majors at the end of last year, too. His problem comes against lefties. The Twins haven’t bothered to platoon him, but you should try to in fantasy leagues if you wanna pick him up. In related news, Joe Mauer likes to call him Chris Parm.
Brock Holt – 4-for-5, 2 runs. Could get on base and steal a little bit (maybe 4 steals the rest of the way), but his talents are mostly limited to sounding like a superhero’s alias.
Matt Holliday – Left yesterday’s game with back stiffness. He’s day-to-day. That’s not much of a Holliday.
Jaime Garcia – 7 1/3 IP, 0 ER, 9 baserunners, 5 Ks. He looked great when he first returned from the DL, then just decent not great, then he looked terrible. If he looks just decent not great again next time out, I’m calling his tell.
Jose Quintana – 1 1/3 IP, 7 ER. That’s two more than his last name suggested. Looks like the rookie surprise is toast for this year. The only crazy thing was that he didn’t even have the worst line on his team this game (Humber went 1/3 IP, 8 ER in relief. It feels like yesterday he was throwing a perfect game, if you’ve been in a coma for the last three and a half months.)
Justin Masterson – 6 IP, 2 ER, 5 baserunners, 4 Ks @DET. He’s unSONable.
Dan Uggla – The Braves announced that Uggla would not be a starter for the final month. But how will Braves rallies end now? Who will step up to get outs? Brian McCann can only do so much! This is obviously terrible news for Uggla owners– Wait, strike that, this is the best news Uggla owners have got all year. You have an excuse to drop him. You’re welcome.
Jordan Pacheco – 2-for-4 with his 4th homer. He’s now batting near .400 in the last week with two homers. The Rox aren’t home but Pacheco is showing three Yakuzas, flashing a sign, “Gigglepot!” (I don’t know what the Japanese Pachinko slot machines show, but three Yakuzas and calling it a ‘gigglepot’ seemed about right.)
Jay Bruce – 2-for-3 with his 31st homer and 91st RBI. I think we can safely call off the Ryan Ludwick vs. Jay Bruce fantasy value race. Ludwick got a flat, pit stopped and Bruce took the checkered flag. Sorry, Ludwick, fantasy baseballers draft Bruce, not you or Cole Trickle.
Mat Latos – Solid start at home (Win, 7 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 6 Ks) and is now 11-2 with a 3.42 ERA, 1.12 WHIP and close to a 1 K per IP since May 1st. Dusty is softening us up for next year when he throws Latos and Aroldis a combined 500 innings.
Kyle Kendrick – 6 IP, 2 ER, 7 baserunners, 3 Ks. Last time he pitched, I said I’d give him a looksie. I’d double down on that and give him a little how’s your father?
Emilio Bonifacio – Marlins made official what we speculated on last week. Bonifacio was shut down for the season. Sad trombonifacio.
Norichika Aoki – 2-for-5, 2 runs, 3 RBIs and his 7th homer. Yesterday, February Grey paid me a visit. He wasn’t wearing a shirt and it looked like he hadn’t showered since last February. He came to tell me he ranks Aoki just outside the top 60 outfielders and a bunch of people think he’s too low. Then April Grey showed up and he was wearing a tostada salad shell for a hat and he said by April 15th there’s at least 20 comments asking about dropping Aoki.
Jeff Bianchi – 1-for-4 with his 3rd homer in the last week. That’s more homers than he had in 499 plate appearances in Double-A in 2011 and he only had 5 homers this year in Triple-A. Bianchi is Italian for aberration.
Kenley Jansen – Dodgers announced that Kenley can return to the club for the September 18th series. This is great news. Well, not great as in he’s returning, but great as in now you know you can cut him. What’s he gonna return for ten games? Maybe 3 save opportunities? Maybe he has a setback and can’t even pitch. I’d grab League or Belisario, and move on.
Jeff Samardzija – The Cubs announced they will discuss shutting down Samardzija. When? They can’t figure out a good time to discuss this? They busy plotting an “accident” for Alfonso Soriano? They need to synchronize their iCals?
Ian Desmond – 2-for-5, 4 RBIs with his 20th homer. At Nationals Park yesterday, it was Free Cortisone Shot Night. There were six homers in total. Ryan Zimmerman hit his 18th (grr); Jesus Flores threw a hail mary for his 5th and Tyler Moore threw his hat in the air for his 8th.
Adam LaRoche – 4-for-4 with two solo homers. He’s at 25 homers and 85 RBIs this year and now qualifies as the boringest 1B to ever have five seasons of 25 HRs/80+ RBIs. Mazel LaTov! You might’ve seen this Arby’s commercial, it’s about how they’re introducing a turkey sandwich. That it’s the best thing since their roast beef sandwiches. If Arby’s roast beef sandwiches are Adam LaRoche, their turkey sandwiches are Andy LaRoche.
Luke Gregerson – Got the save yesterday in the 11th inning. If there’s ever a sign a guy is the closer, it’s when the manager holds him until there’s a lead in extras. Oh, and Street’s about a week or two away. Should be great for the Padres playoff run!
Brandon Moss – 1-for-4 with his 16th homer. The A’s have 10 more homers from ex-Sox OFs (Reddick, Moss) than the whole Red Sox OF this year. Without those two A’s, it makes it tougher for the locals to pronounce Boston.
Cody Ross – 1-for-4 and hit his 20th homer. Kathie Lee and Frank Ross must be so proud.
Ryan Vogelsong – 3 1/3 IP, 6 ER. Bochy used eleven pitchers in 11 innings yesterday. He’s like the anti-Dusty. By the 18th inning, the bat boy would’ve been pitching. As for Vogelsong, I told you to drop him last week.
Franklin Gutierrez – Hit a home run then left the game with a tight groin. Someone got a little too excited during his home run trot.
