by: Grey
Doesn’t Danny Valencia sound like a bad actor’s stage name? “For my audition, I’m going to do the scene ‘Eating the Old 96er’ from The Great Outdoors.” Okay, try not to choke. (Quick side note: My aunt used to date Danny Aiello. But not Danny Aiello, the actor. A different Danny Aiello. It was like […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Ryan Zimmerman has a strained intercostal, which runs along the ocean from Miami to Georgia (I believe). Tough break for those making the drive up the coast and for Zimmerman’s owners. It sounds like he’s donezo. The Nats will have Bowden’s old Segway, that was in storage, man 3rd for the rest of the season. […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Wouldn’t say this is crunch time as much as this is “Your nuts are in a cracker and the season’s closing in and squeezing tight so you better just throw any pitchers that are available because you need stats — stat!” time. The line for last week was 3.52 ERA, 1.22 WHIP, 74 Ks and […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Give that dog a bone! Wait, what? Yesterday, Nick Blackburn went 7 IP, 1 ER, 7 baserunners, 2 Ks. Usually after a team clinches their division, they wake up like it’s Ash Wednesday and they were on Bourbon Street for Fat Tuesday. Not dem Twinkies, I tell ya! (Well, who else is telling you? Am […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Some rejected titles were, “It’s A Not-So-Wonderful Elbow, Andrew Bailey,” “Old Man Potter Gets The Last Laugh” and “Won’t You Come Home, Andrew Bailey? Won’t You Come Home?” but when presented with a Party of Five reference, I turn to mush. If you can wash Po5 out of your hair, you’re a better man than […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Who doesn’t love to show their frenemies their fantasy baseball teams in October and say, “Look at what I won with?” Then they see Mike Aviles and they’re confounded, “How did you win with Mike Aviles?” That is the secret to fantasy baseball in September, young ninja. (BTW, if you’re gonna be a ninja and […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Oh, Hanley Ramirez is Hanley Ramirez, and a guy that will play a bit bruised giving it his all is a guy that will play a bit bruised giving it his all, and never the twain shall meet. (I think a “twain” is a train as pronounced by Elmer Fudd. Don’t quote me on that […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
This isn’t the days when Brady Anderson’s sideburns once hit 2 homers in a game while Brady was out with a broken foot. 30 to 45 homers is a lot nowadays. In the final weeks of September, there’s 4 guys who have 35 homers. I think Sammy Sosa once hit 35 homers in a month. […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?You know it’s September when I’m highlighting a guy that could possibly give you maybe one week of just slightly better-than-average stats. Enter stage left, Mark Ellis. Yesterday, he went 3-for-3 with his 4th homer on the season. Is there a meh emoticon? That’s Mark Ellis. He’s a big bottle of “Um, what the hey, I’ll […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Before the NAAPP, National Association for the Advancement of Polish People, write me, it’s not Polish, it’s polish. Pa-lish. Not Pole-lish… Oh, forget it. David Murphy has a hit in every game this month and, with Hamilton out, he’s playing every day. In the month of September, he has a .380 average, 2 homers, 3 […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Jake Westbrook had everything going against him. No schools in his area had an athletic program. His mother was strung out on drugs. His father was absent from his life. Then he met Sandra Bullock. Wait, those aren’t my notes, that’s the back cover of The Blind Side DVD. Yesterday, Westbrook threw 8 IP, 0 […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Last week’s ERA was 2.44. That’s 22 earned runs in 81 innings. The WHIP was 1.28. That’s 104 baserunners. Had 5 Wins and 58 Ks. (That’s minus Thursday’s Westbrook start because, well, it’s Thursday.) Not too shabby on the ERA considering the schmohawks I recommended last week. Obviously, I’m just as unlucky with Wins with […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?