Imagine a very good boy sitting at attention, let’s call that boy, Treat Urner. Treat Urner is looking at you with those doe-eyes giving you all kinds of oxytocin. Your brain is firing off like July 4th over the Hudson. My God it feels good! Stare at me Treat Urner and give me more and more oxytocin! Wag your tail and give me the love! In a baby voice, you lean in, “What does Treat Urner want? Does Treat Urner want a treat? Does he? Okay, to earn one of those treats you need to steal 30 bags, hit 25 homers and hit .300. Can the good boy do that? He can? Aw, what a good Treat Urner this Treat Urner is! Here…” Then I throw the treat into the yard, it lands in the bushes and we spend the next twenty minutes trying to figure out where that stupid treat landed while he licks my ears. Treat Urner was going to be great wherever he went. Landing in Philly gets Kyle Schwarber out of the leadoff slot. Right…RIGHT?! Please someone say I’m right. I don’t want to go to Amoeba Records and scratch Rob Thomas’s name off every CD as an act of deviance vs. the Phils’ manager. By the by, Trea Turner getting 11 years is quite funny.

But, of course, this is for this year, and there’s no one better, when consistency is factored in. Just an absolute lock for great counting stats. Now in Philly, it should help maintain the power, that isn’t top-flight, but good enough for a guy with his speed. Hopefully, he doesn’t pay too close attention to all the other Phils’ fly ball tendencies. “So, you’re saying I should have a Launch Angle of 26? Okay!” That’s Trea Turner at the batting cage with Rhys Hoskins and The Schwammer. No, stay away, Treat Urner! Good boy! For 2023, I’ll give Trea Turner projections of 107/22/101/.293/30 in 606 ABs. That means Treastykakes are the best food in Philly since Chase steaks! Anyway, here’s what else I saw this offseason for 2023 fantasy baseball:

Carlos Estevez – Signed with the Angels. Carlos Estevez is 6′ 6′, and 280 pounds, and appears to be a great signing by the Angels…oh my god, he’s fallen on Trout! NOOOOO! My guess is Estevez is the closer at least 60% of the time with Herget getting 25%, and the field taking the rest, but it’s super early to know how bullpens will shake out. Tentatively, I’ll give Estevez projections of 3-4/3.77/1.30/57, 18 saves in 59 IP.

Justin Verlander – Signed with the Mets. Steve Cohen collects modern art, but prefers classic aces, kinda like A-Rod with women. S0, the Mets add Justin Verlander, as they compose the best staff possible of aces who might remember the 1986 World Series. “Wah-wah, wee-wee, Mookie Wilson.” That’s Justin Verlander’s first words. “Wah-wah, wee-wee, Ray Knight.” That’s Baby Scherzer. Mets are putting together a great pitching staff that won’t at all need the Mets doctors’ attention. Seriously. Because they’re already on Medicare, and can get an in-network doctor. Justin Verlander will likely be thrilled to be looking into that big brown eye once again. Get your heads out of the gutter, I’m not talking about Kate Upton! I’m talking about Max Scherzer’s one brown eye.

If you think about it, the writing was on the wall with Justin Verlander and his wife and the Mets signing:

So, Justin Verlander goes to a new league, though the Astros used to be an NL team. Does that count? No? Okay. The whole league thing is irrelevant nowadays, and the new team does nothing either for a guy like Verlander, except he no longer has to contend with the Crawford Boxes. Oh, wait a second, his HR/9 was only 0.6. His strikeouts were down, but you almost get the sense that he was throwing more to contact (relatively), because he was returning from Tommy John, and knew he wouldn’t be able to throw 220 IP. Him and Scherzer are such reliable stalwarts that the Mets got better, even with the loss of deGrom, i.e., Verlander + Scherzer is better than deGrom + Scherzer. Just for the reliability and innings. Not saying Verlander is better than deGrom inning to inning, but when you need 175 IP more than an insane 100 IP, Verlander is the one. He’s actually The One. For 2023, I’ll give Justin Verlander projections of 17-5/2.54/0.94/196 in 179 IP.

71 Comments
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VinWins
VinWins
1 month ago

Not a Star Wars person either, but I watched And/or on your recommendation. Excellent. A couple slow episodes when our hero’s luck went bad, but then it picked up again.

The other show I have recently enjoyed was SAS Rogue Heroes (IMdB), the story of the creation of the British Special Forces in WWII Africa. On something called Epix, so not sure if you’ll be able to watch it.

VinWins
VinWins
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

I have watched Season 1 of Slow Horses and am looking forward to the 2nd season.

VinWins
VinWins
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

Yeah, I have the first 2 episodes. Figured I might wait for more. Mostly I’ve been rotating through many bad Netflix series that I can only stand watching 1 episode at a time, so maybe I’ll just watch those 2.

VinWins
VinWins
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

Hadn’t really considered it, but I’ll give it a look.

Will
Will
1 month ago

Padres supposedly offered Judge 10 year and $400 million. What is AJ Preller playing with, Monopoly money out there in SD? That would have been over $1 billion committed to 3 players.

Will
Will
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

Well it was Bobby Nightengale reporting it so take that fwiw

frankgrimes
frankgrimes
1 month ago

Judge is over rated anyway….

LennyDykstraIsJustMisUnderstood
LennyDykstraIsJustMisUnderstood
1 month ago

Love having turner in philly and can’t imagine him NOT leading off over schwarber……….i think the phillies are adding years to spread cost so they can make other moves, his money will be (relatively) inconsiquential in 11 years

LennyDykstraIsJustMisUnderstood
LennyDykstraIsJustMisUnderstood
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

who is projecting that ? seems they are just looking for clicks i’m sure he will be leading off an hoskins will be 5 hole when harper is back ….although schwarber would only be leading off once a game i don’t have the stats but the bottom of the order was pretty good last year schwarber came up with runners on alot…thinking turner, JT, scwarb or turner, schwarb, JT

The Great Knoche
1 month ago

That turn went well.

frankgrimes
frankgrimes
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

It’s easy Just look at my team!

frankgrimes
frankgrimes
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

It’s a bold strategy lol some of these early picks seem a bit “reachy” to me but I’m dopey af

frankgrimes
frankgrimes
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

Would you take Ohtani in this format?

frankgrimes
frankgrimes
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

Oh great now you tell me!
I didn’t expect him to fall. I was leaning yordong Bo or Vlad.

Dave D
Dave D
1 month ago

BTW, I wouldn’t be shocked if the Angels went after a legit closer like Jansen. I like Esteves signing I guess, but I’d be suprised if they go with him as the solution there. I don’t think they’re done with bullpen.

Dave D
Dave D
1 month ago

Had to go Varsho with my pick. I thought about Clase, but couldn’t pull the trigger on a closer that early.

Dave D
Dave D
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

Yes. My strategy was to just to grab who I thought was top bat available for first two picks.

Dave D
Dave D
Reply to  Dave D
1 month ago

Since we have CI and UT I figured position is sorta irrelevant first few picks.

Dave D
Dave D
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

Haha!!

Dave D
Dave D
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

Yeah, didn’t really want to take a CL at 55, but Ive been without a CL a few times in a draft and hold and basically its a kiss of death. I’ll pray for Romano. CL looks even more sketchy than usual this yeat.

Dave D
Dave D
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

Me too, but I pulled the trigger nonetheless.

frankgrimes
frankgrimes
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

Not having a closer always seems to F me. I say never again but here we are and I can’t bring myself to grab one. I hate closers!

Dave D
Dave D
Reply to  frankgrimes
1 month ago

Yeah the only thing worse than picking a closer early is not having one with no free agent additions all year and watching someone like Hansel Robles or Ryan Braiser blow their third and last save opp for the year.

Dave D
Dave D
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

Congrats on finally getting a 1B!!!

Dave D
Dave D
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

Not bad, as long as he finds 20+ homer power again in HOU. If not he’s a normal year Gurriel replacement of 10-70 .300

Dave D
Dave D
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

Thanks! I always align with you on pitching philosophy. Your #7 starter counts just as much as your #1 starter, especially in this format. Depth is king.

The Great Knoche
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

Might not make a pick today.

Dave D
Dave D
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

Finally got my 2nd in just now. Went for SS, was wavering between Adames and Edman, went Adames.

Dave D
Dave D
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

Kewl. Cannot have too much power nowadays.

Smitty
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

ABSOLUTELY!

JasonH
JasonH
1 month ago

Hey Grey,

Got my toughest keeper decision yet and would love your input!

I can keep 6 total, and only 1 free agent hitter and 1 free agent pitcher who would count as 6th or 7th rounders , they are labeled FA, thanks in advance.

Goldschimdt 3
Teoscar 6
Swanson (FA -6)
Nathan Lowe (FA-6)
Martin Perez (FA -7)
Rasmussen (FA -7)
Patrick Sandoval 11
Joe ryan 12
Varsho 14
Jordan Montgomery 17
Eovaldi 18

The Great Knoche
Reply to  JasonH
1 month ago

Goldy, Teoscar, Swanson, Ryan, Varsho, Jomo for me.

The Great Knoche
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

Sure did.

Dave D
Dave D
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

Yeah, went for bat over position.

Dave D
Dave D
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

I was about to draft Swanson but the guy before me did, so I went Schwarber.

Dave D
Dave D
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

Id like to see him batting behind Trea which can give hime another 20-30 RBI.

goodfold2
goodfold2
Reply to  Grey
1 month ago

yeah, but he already had those crackers in there last year.