Oh, hello there. I’m not quite sure why I’m greeting you like you’re at my front door, but if you are, well played! Here’s a restraining order OR a certificate of approval. (To be fair, I never know the difference, at least legally speaking.) As the title reveals, the 2015 Baseball season is upon us, and I’m here to just take a moment to give you the insider info of what to expect from Razzball this season. As this series continues weekly, we’ll review what happened the previous week on your favorite fantasy baseball site (and if it isn’t your favorite, just lie to me and say it is), and what to expect the following week. Kind of like going over the lay of the land, if you will. The land of mustaches, math, and, um, well, I can’t really think of another ‘m’ word. Midgets. Yes. The land of midgets. That makes no sense. Regardless, whether you’re brand new to the community, or a veteran among the Razzballian (Razzballer?) readership, follow me after the jump for intriguing and interesting things. Anybody have another “I” word for me? Anybody?

Starting off your Sundays, Mike will have his usual Prospect Report, an in-depth look for all you prospectors out there. Unless you’re mining for gold. That’s not the type of prospecting I’m talking about. Right after that, J-FOH will be getting creepy (DEFAULT POSITION) with the Creeper of the Week, a post covering which hitter to stream for the upcoming scoring period. But there’s more! He’ll also be ranking the Top-100 Hitters weekly, so you can get your knives out to argue over the numerical order of things. I’ve ordered a new set of knives just for this!

On Monday, you’ll get the special treat of not just reading Grey’s insights, but hearing them too on the Razzball Podcast. Oh, yeah, JB Gilpin is there, but you’d be hard-pressed to hear him over Grey’s cackle. Tune in all season, as we’ll have special guests and probably some math lessons from Rudy. Lance will then take you on a SAGNOF journey, so special, we’re calling it the SAGNOF Special. For those not initiated, SAGNOF stands for Steals/Saves Ain’t Got No Face… because they don’t. It would be creepy. Like J-FOH. During this series, Lance will go over some attractive and available options for your team if you are in need of steals or saves. If only he could do that for my dating-life. Rounding up Monday is JB Gilpin…again? What happened here? Special volume rate or something? Just like J-FOH did the day before with the hitters, Gilpin will spotlight a pitcher you just have to know (with GIFs!) and bring you his Top-100 Pitcher Rankings of the week. More knife action!

Tuesday brings some unique OBP coverage from TheHukillEffect (seriously though, hu did you kill, and what is the effect, amiright?), followed up with the RCL Update, hosted by J-FOH. He’ll be following all your leagues and reporting back to everyone that you actually rostered Bruce Chen for the week. Ending the day is the popular series One Man’s Trash, where Magoo will go over the biggest wavier adds and drops and go contrarian on those moves. You’re dropping B.J. Upton? I say yes, but he’s gonna say no. So I guess the lesson here is to never say no to a B.J. friends. (Low-hanging fruit alert!)

Mike returns with even more Prospect content on Wednesday, setting the stage for Paul Singman to do… well, who know’s what he’s going to do? I have no idea. I’m not even sure Paul knows, but that’s what makes it so interesting. Nobody knows anything, so obviously he’ll be talking about politics. The day finishes off with a heavy dose of sexual innuendo, sexual anecdotes, and sexual chocolate with our very own underwear model Tehol. He’ll go over his disgraces and delights, which usually involve Christian Slater and Domonic Brown. And really just them. That’s all he ever talks about.

Blues will bring us back to OBP leagues on Thursday, a growing category in this fantasy sport we play, but just between us, it could use a little more Thelonious Monk. Smokey then comes to you with his Weekly Bullpen Report and recommendations of what to do with all those Closers and Set-up men. He’ll also talk about DonkeyCorns, which is probably my favorite part. We all have fetishes man. Bridging us to Friday, Magoo will go over his animal thoughts in Bear or Bull, one of my favorite series. And it’s totally not because I used to write it. Totally not. Totally. Not. He’ll be spotlighting players that have both short-term and long-term fantasy appeal, and use radical things like numbers and stuff to convince on what kind of animal they are. Sounds like a LSD trip, so get your popcorn ready! (Does popcorn go with LSD?)

Friday brings Malamoney and his army of Excel’s, promising both riches and prosperity in Points Leagues. Seth will follow up with his deep leagues report, properly named Deep Impact. If he can somehow involve Morgan Freeman, I’d faint. Both of these series are the tasty meat in what is the Grey sandwich (yum!), as Grey will end the day with his Buy/Sell post.

We all get busy sometimes, fantasy baseball becomes secondary, that’s okay! Leading of Saturdays (Hey! Just like today!), I’ll be going over the highlights of the week on Razzball, everything you need to know in one post, and I’m going to win a Nobel Peace Prize for it. I mean, how hard could it be? President Obama has one, and he wasn’t even born a United States citizen. Right after, Dan Pants will return with his Friday Round-Up, a recap of all of Friday’s games. Ralph ends the day with all of your Two-Start Pitcher options for the upcoming week.

And then we do the whole thing over and over again. That is, until the season is over. Or you switch for Fantasy Football. Whichever comes first! (Usually me.)

Remember, we’ll have Daily Fantasy Strategy every day of the week as well, helping you set up your lineups with tips, strategy, and boobs. Okay, I’m lying about the boobs, but I feel like that’s the shot in the arm DFS needs…

And, you know, I didn’t mention it, but I don’t think I have to. Grey is here everyday giving you love, laughter, and uh…anybody have another “L” word?

Lesbianism?

SHOOOOREEEEEE…

 

Welcome to the 2015 Fantasy Baseball Season. Welcome to Razzball.

 

 

 
  1. Nathan says:
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    This is my favorite site. Looking forward to the season Jay. Thanks for all you do

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @Nathan: Liar! But totally man, thanks for reading!

  2. Chuzwozza says:
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    First ever fantasy baseball season and I’m getting pumped! This seems as good a place as any to say thanks a lot to you, Grey, Rudy, Smoky and everyone else for all the info thus far. Reckon I’m gonna be leaning on this site a fair bit as the season goes on if I can stick it out.
    Good luck to all!

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @Chuzwozza: Sounds great, and good luck!

  3. Gator says:
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    My league gives us one NA slot for prospects and the like.

    I drafted Buxton to be my NA slot guy but I also drafted Salazar, who just got sent down. Who do I keep?

    • Jason E. says:
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      @Gator: Buxton but Salazar has a better shot to be relevant in 2915…at least that’s my opinion

      • ThreePete says:
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        @Jason E.: Salazar might have finally figured out some consistency by 2915. But he might be a little old.

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @Gator: Gotta go Buxton. Salazar seems broken at this point… but there’s still a bit of hope.

      • Gator says:
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        @Jay:
        @Jason E.:

        Thanks fellas

  4. Baggiejohn says:
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    Love, laughter and licentiousness, sprinkled with libidinous lunacy … that’s our Grey!

    When you list them all out like that … wow! so many great writers, so much insight … and so many nice guys too … hey, I’m choking up here … give me a moment …

    The day I found Razzball was the day I started to really understand Fantasy Baseball (God bless you, Google!). I wish all the writers and the readers all the best with their teams for the season – may all your forearm tightnesses turn out to be non-season ending (looking at you, Alex Cobb)

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @Baggiejohn: Nice “L” usage! And thank you!

  5. Duda Want To Build A Snowman? says:
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    Appreciate the rundown, Jay! This is really awesome. In particular, I love the extra OBP coverage! You guys rock.

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @Duda Want To Build A Snowman?: Definitely a growing category, which I’m a huge fan of. I think HuKill and Blues are going to run with it this season!

      • @Jay:

        I managed to convince my
        League to expand from 5×5 to 6×6, with OBP as the 6th hitting category.

        That was 4 years ago and everyone loves it – walks should count. I bitched about that for 5 years until we finally changed it.

        Now I’ll never go back.

  6. Mac McMacinmac says:
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    The worst thing about this site is that I want to share it with friends but I also do not want anyone else from any of my leagues finding out about it.

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @Mac McMacinmac: Hear that all the time. Just click on our ads 11 times! All will be forgiven. Amen.

  7. Rubik's Pube says:
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    Cargo’s surgically repaired knee is already barking and Weiss took him out of the game yesterday. That didn’t take long.

      • Ra'zbahl Al Ghul says:
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        @Jay: ugh. Yup

    • @Rubik’s Pube:

      Dickerson could be everything we’ve expected from CarGo all these years except with 150 games.

      Wonder if he’ll bat 3rd if CarGo missed any time…hitting in front of Tulo (for the 90 games he plays) would be a boost….

      • Rubik's Pube says:
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        @Lucky Dog: True. Dickerson is creeping up the draft boards lately. If it keeps up, there will come a point where I can’t substantiate burning a pick on him with his massive home/road and platoon splits.

  8. royce! says:
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    Jack mentioned doing a 100 hitters post (like JB’s 100 pitchers post) but I didn’t realize it was weekly. That’s just bonkers. Perfect for him!

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @royce!: well, I’m making him do it daily, but just posting it once a week. I’m just that nice.

    • J-FOH says:
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      @royce!: because its bonkers makes it perfect for me? and Jay has anointed me the creepy guy?

      • Jay

        Jay says:
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        @J-FOH: I think you made yourself creepy.

        • J-FOH says:
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          @Jay: I resent that, it’s only relative. Sky in person is much creepier than I

      • royce! says:
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        @J-FOH: By “bonkers” I meant “extremely dedicated.” It was contextually implied.

        In all seriousness, that seems like a lot of work, but holy shizz it could be really helpful. Are you gonna do it by hand? Or just use hittertron numbers for the whole week?

        • J-FOH says:
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          @royce!: a mix of both, I’ll be employing it as a tool for my ranks, but not my ranks

  9. Strolg says:
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    Have an opening in our RCL $100 buy in league as one of our guys doesn’t want to do 10 leagues this year. Just email me at [email protected] and I’ll give you the skinny. Top 5 league last year.

  10. Wallpaper Paterson says:
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    Still not in any leagues

  11. Sky

    Sky says:
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    We DFS writers ARE the boobs, Jay. We have all the needs covered!

    • J-FOH says:
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      @Sky: I think you meant are boobs

      • Sky

        Sky says:
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        @J-FOH: I think you need a cup or three of coffee before snarking

        • J-FOH says:
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          @Sky: Snark off!

          • Sky

            Sky says:
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            You’ve been optioned to snark minors

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Haha

            • J-FOH says:
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              @Sky: I’ll remember that when you need your DFS bullpen arm later in the year because someone needs to be there for their families. *runs down hallway into room, slams door, throws self on bed, sobs*

              • Mike

                Mike says:
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                Jack? It’s Mike. Listen…I know you’re upset right now, but I’m going to need you to open the door.

                I left my Ipod in there and I really need it.

                • J-FOH says:
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                  @Mike: oh thats yours?sorry about that. I might have gotten tears and some snot on it. You might want to clean it

  12. mcBlunty says:
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    short term keeper league, h2h cat league, can only keep guys 2 years, slotted value where player moves up 2 rounds from where drafted, non drafted players are kept in the second to last round, can only keep 2, I am for sure keeping Todd Frazier who was undrafted therefore i get him in the 21st round

    here are my other options and round they would be kept
    Gattis 17
    J Zimmerman 5
    C Blakcmon 20 (was undrafted but already keeping an undrafted guy)
    Kipnis 4
    Alexi Ramirez 20
    Span 20

    thanks

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @mcBlunty: I’m not a huge fan of Gattis, but that value is really good this year. I’d probably go with him.

  13. jal179 says:
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    10 team h2h yahoo redraft 5X5 plus Hits, OPS, Quality Starts

    Drop Oswaldo Arcia (my 7th OF–only start 5… loved the value had to take him…) or Avisail Garcia for Boxberger? Other closers are Holland, Cishek and Rondon.

    Current OFs are Marte, Cruz, Yelich, Martin, Steve Pearce.

    Thoughts?

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @jal179: I like Arcia of Garcia.

  14. Charles says:
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    Anyone know where Rudy’s custom auction salaries will be ready by Tuesday? I’d buy the $20 year if I knew I could use that for my upcoming draft. Need OBP, Hitter Strikeouts, QS, and Losses.

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @Charles: I’ll ping him on it…

    • the custom player rater won’t be done until sometime in late April. Targeting by May 1. Sorry.

  15. Tehol Beddict says:
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    Has anyone seen my pants?

  16. slimbo says:
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    hey, need your help :) need to pick 4 pitchers to keep out of these….8 team league with 14 keepers

    bumgarner, kluber, jordan zimmermann , teheran, iwakuma, cobb, gray, and darvish

    in a tough spot with darvish…i have to keep the guy i take it?

    heres my keepers
    abreau, bautista, cano, rendon, fielder, marte, reyes, frazier, betts, yelich
    also could keep dozier or mesoraco…see any changes you would make??

    thanks for everything!

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @slimbo: I’d do Kluber, Gray, Darvish, and Bum. I’m fine with your batters.

    • @slimbo:

      MadBum, Teheran, Kluber = no brainers
      Cobb is sounding more and more like a minor injury, so he’s tempting.

      But I’d rather have Dozier – 20-20 2B isn’t sucky at all.

      If you’re hell bent on a pitcher, Zimmerman is more reliable than Yu. But then, I’m not a big Yu fan so take that with the grain of bitterness that I harbor.

      Good luck!

  17. My favorite site – love you guys & the humor and intensity you bring on the regular. Not that I know your digestive situation that intimately. Maybe I shoulda used a different word.

    Anyway, thanks again for a great preseason of insight & giggles.

    Thanks in part to you wackos I’ve now got the “all upside outfield” in my 12 team 6×6, with Soler, Yelich, Dickerson, Lagares, & Brantley, with Trout as my only “lock” – 1st time in 16 years I’ve had the #1 pick, so bank on Trout playing less than 70 games. (Knock on wood)

    Y’all were also instrumental in helping me identify bargain pitching – while I got hosed at the bot corner by someone reaching for Arendo at 4.02 (bastard!) it forced me to take Grienke at the 5-6 turn, and then I waited until the 11th to take another pitcher. Ended up with Weaver, Ana.Sanchez, Gio, Wacha, Shelby Miller, Shoemaker, & Hammel – many of those names y”all helped me to identify.

    So thank you for helping me to build what I see as a very competitive team, despite missing many of the players I targeted due to idiots reaching for guys 3-4 rounds early.

    Also, Kris Bryant went in the 4th round. Not a keeper league. I hope Gray is right about June 1st. Then K’s 100 times. That owner needs a lesson.

    Good luck to everyone at Razzball this year!

    Scott

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @Lucky Dog: You’re welcome, and good luck!

  18. jal179 says:
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    Boxberger and Andrew Miller.

    What are each’s percentage as ending up team’s closer?

    • Rubik's Pube says:
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      @jal179: Betances has been getting smacked around pretty good all spring. I know, it’s just ST but his control has been shaky at best . The most concerning thing is his velocity is way down. Now keep in mind, he is still throwing 92-94, but last spring he was touching 98+. If he keeps it up, I can’t see them putting him in high leverage situations that would accelerate a complete melt down. I’d grab Miller everywhere if he is available.

      • jal179 says:
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        @Rubik’s Pube:

        Yeah everything I’m reading says Betances is struggling.

        Boxberger at least will chip in April May but somehow I feel like he keeps the job given how untouchable he was last year….. things change quick I guess

        • Rubik's Pube says:
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          @jal179: I’ve been stashing Miller, Boxberger, and Clippard in every league I’m in. If Miller starts the season closing, I don’t think Girardi will change it mid season unless Miller really struggles. Clippard is going to take the reigns at least until the ASB I would think. Rotator cuff injuries, even small ones, are no joke. I think Doolittle will get eased back into the pen slowly and he would have to prove he can dominate again before he takes over the closer role again. Most likely, they let Clippard handle closing the whole year and then let him hit the road in FA. It will give Doolittle the whole season to heal up, pitch in low leverage situations, and get back to normal. Boxberger I’m not sure about. The Rays are weird with their relievers and McGee’s “elbow cleanup” isn’t going to require nearly as much rehab as Doolittle’s. I say use Boxberger while you can, and get it while the gettin’s is good.

          • jal179 says:
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            @Rubik’s Pube:

            Wish I could stash all 3… cant doer in shallow league tho.

            I can’t dump Avisail… I had him last year and have been salivating since.

            My other 3 RPs are Holland, Cishek, and Rondon– I likely have enough saves already

  19. RotoLance

    RotoLance says:
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    I’m looking for a last minute addition to my home league. It’s OBP, H2H and the auction draft is tonight at 10pm ET. Please let me know if interested. Thanks.

    • Wallpaper Paterson says:
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      @RotoLance: Aww shucks. That is what I am looking for but that auction time,is not good for me.

  20. Bobby says:
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    Who would you rather in a keeper league between Bogaerts, Alex Wood, or Michael Wacha?

    • @Bobby:

      I prefer Watcha. Xander is a cool name but Wacha makes me think of Fozzy Bear, which is worth more to me.

      That and I’m not 100% sold on Xander & Waxha has nasty filthy stuff. I have a thing for young pitchers with nasty filthy stuff.

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @Bobby: Bogaerts.

  21. Bsw says:
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    Great lineup. One question-I know Tom is gone, but no love for ops leagues?

    • Jay

      Jay says:
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      @Bsw: Our OBP guys will be double-dipping into that cat for all to enjoy!

Comments are closed.