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Every year, I put on a David Carradine-limited edition kimono, and walk the earth to ruminate on the perfect place for each player in my fantasy baseball rankings. Mike Rowe from Dirty Jobs called me one year, asking if he could film my feet after one of these “walking of the earth” seshs. I declined, because my feet after 8,000 steps (according to my iWatch) on the sands of Redondo Beach are…*shudders*…I stepped on a half-eaten corndog this year. With mustard! And that’s not a euphemism for Paul DeJong. Do the guys from Yahoo Fantasy don a kimono and walk the earth for a full half-an-afternoon like me to do the Yahoo fantasy baseball rankings? Are they stepping on half-eaten corndogs for you? I highly doubt it. “These Yahoo rankings are not Kung Fu!” I scream into the jetty, as I excavate for starfish, which calms me. So, after I kebab multiple starfishes onto a skewer, I sit by an open fire, dining out on nature, and will now compare my 2022 fantasy baseball rankings with 2022 Yahoo fantasy baseball rankings:

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Hello, or hola, as I learned during my 13 years of Spanish. Welcome to my critique of Yahoo’s 2021 fantasy baseball rankings. Or as I sometimes call it, “I don’t know what they’re thinking, but the longer I think about it the more it hurts my brain, so let’s just shrug through this without acquiring a tumor.” Let’s not have my obit be, “Grey is survived by a much older wife, Cougs, and Yahoo’s fantasy baseball rankings.” We’re gonna bury them, they’re not gonna bury us! Uh, me! See, we’re putting things in perspective, my over-the-internet friend. I have my aggravation ratio down to 3:2. For every three rankings I don’t agree with, I’m only screaming twice. It’s very freeing. I feel light as a feather. A very toxic feather. Anyway, here’s a totally impartial look at Yahoo’s 2021 fantasy baseball rankings vs. my own 2021 fantasy baseball rankings:

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Will get out of the way upfront the compliments. Yahoo isn’t nearly as bad as ESPN this year. (Likely any year.) Here’s my critique of the ESPN 2020 fantasy baseball rankings. ESPN appears to be phoning it in and they haven’t paid their phone bill in six months and they’re in talks with a bankruptcy attorney to get an extension on their bill because, “What defunct are they talking about?” While I don’t agree with all of Yahoo’s 2020 fantasy baseball rankings, I can at least understand what they’re talking about most of the time. For unstints, they have Fernando Tatis Jr. ranked 11th overall vs. my 10th, and ESPN has him at 43rd overall. That especially feels like a joke, much like, “Knock, knock.” “Who’s there?” “An Astros player stealing signs.” So, before this becomes a 360-degree jerk with my new best friends at Yahoo, who I’m guessing not-so-secretly despise me, here’s a totally impartial look at Yahoo’s 2020 fantasy baseball rankings vs. my own 2020 fantasy baseball rankings: