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Please see our player page for Matthew Liberatore to see projections for today, the next 7 days and rest of season as well as stats and gamelogs designed with the fantasy baseball player in mind.

Yesterday, Wander Franco was placed on administrative leave until further notice as MLB continues its ongoing investigation. So, what does this mean? It means he should step into a rocket, aim it at the sun, and we should press “launch.” He could come back in September or not at all. My guess is he’s at least done for this season. Hoping his name is cleared and he returns, because, in that scenario, no children were harmed. Reading the tea leaves, it does not feel like that scenario is the most likely one. It feels like Wander’s not coming back any time soon, if ever again, as the Rays took down all signs of him from around their park. That’s right, the Rays ‘Poochie died on the way back to his home planet’d him. Because the Rays have a never-ending supply of top prospects, the turnstile, uh, turned and entered Osleivis Basabe going 2-for-5, 2 runs, 4 RBIs and his 1st homer. I can spell just about every name without blinking. Put me in an MLB spelling bee and watch me walk away victorious. With that said, I might have to make an auto-fill for the name Osleivis Basabe. If you can get through Osleivis, then you have to fight the urge to write Baseball. He now should have everyday playing time and I’m interested in seeing what he can do. When he came up, there was talk Osleivis could be a Luis Arraez with speed. Call him Luis ThesceneinBoogieNightswithfirecrackers. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Reid Detmers (7 1/3 IP, 0 ER, 1 hit, 4 BBs, 5 Ks, ERA at 4.93) had a no-hitter finishing up the 7th inning at 104 pitches. Then, during the commercial break, he went into the dugout, with a notary public and wrote, “I, Reid Detmers, of sound mind and body, hereby bequeath my shoulder to science, so Phil Nevin will let me throw a 200-pitch no hitter, and I ask that it be called The Last Voyage of Detmers after that weird-looking vampire on a boat movie that is getting terrible reviews.” With that, the notary stamped it, and it was official forever. By the way, you ever walk into a notary and ask them to notarize something and they’re like, “This paper says you’re ruler of the U.S. and China. I can’t notarize this,” and you say, “Don’t make me go to war with your notary store.” No? Meh, guess it’s me! So, Reid Detmers either throws a gem or a dud. While he almost threw a no-no, he knows no in-between. He allowed 29 runs over his last 25 1/3 innings. Then, this. His peripherals look great, like he could be a 2024 fantasy beast, but I also don’t even know what we’re getting from him in his next start. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Liberatore sounds like a work of art by Picasso. “Did you see Liberatore? It’s his answer to Guernica. Masterful!” Or it sounds like something that is followed by a long list of side effects in a brand new weight loss drug commercial. Read really fast, “Liberatore can cause stomach bloating, stomach lining erosion, stomach ooh-oohs, stomach ah-ahs, stomach explosion and the runs.” Liberatore actually causing the runs with his pitching, but not last night! Matthew Liberatore went 8 IP, 0 ER, 2 hits, zero walks, 7 Ks, ERA at 5.72, and showed that promise that was hinted at when he was first called up. Liberatore, also, has some of the worst peripherals in baseball. Could he be good one day? Sure. Matthew Liberatore for 2024 fantasy? I’m interested, potentially. For this year? I have my doubts. I wouldn’t even Streamonator with him. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Brandon Pfaadt (7 IP, 1 ER, 3 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 7.11) returned three starts ago to the Diamondbacks’ rotation so has there been any changes? First off, his ERA of 7.11 doesn’t play here, cuz. We are *claps hands* Wawa! We are *claps hands* Wawa! We are *claps hands* Wawa! Coursing through my veins is Type O, no, you dint. That 7.11 Slurpee-ass ERA is deceiving. His last three starts: 3.37 ERA. Also, and more importantly, 16:2. That’s the most important ratio. No, not Jon Snow’s Golden Ratio of his butt. That’s his K:BB in 18 2/3 IP, and that plays. This is for this year, but I’m already getting worked up for Brandon Pfaadt’s 2024 fantasy hoo-ha. Remember, he was supposed to be an ace. That didn’t disappear because he struggled in his first call-up. Don’t make me go back to how even Kershaw looked pedestrian in his first call-up. Let me just go there while saying I won’t go there. In fact (Grey’s got more!), starters tend to take three years to get their footing in the majors. Either way, the command has been there since his recall, so hold off on rasberrying your lips at Brandon Pfft. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The last two weeks I’ve said some variation of, “Pablo Lopez (9 IP, 0 ER, 4 hits, zero walks, 12 Ks, ERA at 3.89) is the biggest Buy Low.” Prolly called him Pab-Lo, but the sentiment remained the same. Buy Low, I said, as I stood below your window, waiting for you to lower your hair so I could climb up and whispering why Pablo Lopez was a Buy Low. His K/9 is 11.2 and his BB/9 is 2.4. I did a Zoom call with those numbers and talked dirty until they called me a Toobin and hung up. His xFIP is 3.45. That’s SHE upside down on a calculator. You need more info here? Really? Everything looked perfect on his perfs, the only thing that was poking out and ruining things was his unlucky LOB%. Once that corrected itself, he was going to be an ace. Ya know one way to avoid a LOB problem? It’s to leave guys on freakin’ base! That was going to be the easiest thing to correct for someone with a 11+ K/9. He is no longer a Buy Low. Hopefully, you got in on Pab-Lo before he became Pab-Properly-Priced. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Royals called up insanely fast speedster,  Dairon Blanco (1-for-4). He’s so fast he just ran in your room, mussed your hair and ran back out without you even seeing him. His name translates to “Strike while the iron is white hot.” Roughly. I’m not a linguist. Dairon has 47 steals in 49 games in Triple-A, which is absolutely hilarious. Oh, and he’s 30 years old. Okay, so the Royals have one of those teleporters like in The Fly, and Rajai Davis was in it when a cheetah entered. They got zapped together and out walked Dairon. Idea Alert! Every MLB team should be required to have an 80-steal burner. Like they all have LOOGYs, they should all have Billy Hamilton clones. This isn’t an idea, this is a must-have. If your fantasy team’s steals are anemic, Dairon is your answer. Otherwise, I’d prolly wait to see the next guy to come out of the cheetah teleporter. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Reds’ manager, David Bell, who is commonly known as Dumb Bell, not because he’s the dumbest motherf*cker to ever manage a baseball team — Phil Nevin is dumber than him — he’s known as Dumb Bell, because he’s the 2nd dumbest MLB manager. (It’s a 29-way tie for 2nd.) Imagine having five top 100 prospects, all under the age of 27, and thinking, “How do I get Kevin Newman into the lineup?” This perplexed Dumb Bell for countless hours. He took a trek to visit a Buddha statue in downtown Cincy (it’s outside Buddha’s Mongolian BBQ) to ask the Buddha what he thought he should do, and the Buddha said, “Look deep within for the knowledge you possess,” so Dumb Bell dropped his pants, bent over backwards in front of a mirror and tried to find that knowledge deep within himself. Sadly, the only knowledge he now possesses is he needs to wipe better. So, Dumb’s got a new piece to play with as Elly De La Cruz was called up. Just gave you an Elly De la Cruz fantasy. Yes, he’s a pickup in every league. Oh, and “yes” reminds me of something: Where the Helly is CES? Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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After the game, the Cards’ front office called Willson Contreras in. He just went 2-for-5, 6 RBIs and notched his 4th and 5th homers — two three-run homers. They wanted to have a word with him. Congratulations, Contreras thought. They could just send a bottle of champagne back to his room, he figured. Maybe they wanted to give it to him in-person. A gesture, that would be welcome. Contreras sat down in front of Oli Marmol and John Mozeliak. “Willson,” they started, “You had a big game today. Do you have any idea how that made Adam Wainwright feel? He’s got a 5.74 ERA, and you’re out scoring that many runs? That’s gotta take a toll on him. Jack Flaherty was in that dugout, and every time you crossed the plate, you could hear him mutter, ‘I give up runs like that.’ Steven Matz looked on the verge of tears! Poor Matzy! This is why Yadi knew best! He knew not to hit home runs. It’s too much showboating. That’s not the Cardinals’ way.” With that, they dismissed Contreras to go back and apologize to his teammates for performing so well. Hopefully he learns his lesson. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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Think Buck Showalter is old. That’s not bad, in general. Some of my favorite people are old. I’m a Cougar Hunter. I have radar for hard candies. The problem with Showalter is he’s got old thinking. He’s platooning Brett Baty. He thinks Thomas Phamily is still a thing. He’s not following the latest in baseball which is: Play your kids! The Braves have been winning with the formula: Play your kids! for a few years now. So, with that said, the Mets called up their next great hitting prospect, Mark Vientos (1-for-4, 2 RBIs) as he hit his 1st homer. Can Vientos play outfield? Absolutely not. Can Vientos steal at-bats from Baty? Ugh, maybe. Can Vientos run? His speed has been described as “an 80-year-old baby crawling with tennis balls on its knees.” Can Vientos hit bombs? To the freakin’ moon! He kinda reminds me of a young Evan Longoria. Now take everything you’ve thought about Longoria over the last seven years, scrub it from your brain, and think about Longoria as if this is 2016. Your brain in 2016, “Rays should lock this Longoria guy up for another ten years! He’s amazing! Wait! They let Longoria walk? Wow, what a mistake! They just let a perennial 30+ homer, .270 hitter go! Rays will be in last place for the next decade. What a bunch of losers!” So, your 2016 brain is kinda remembering correctly. Your 2016 was also a big dumb brain, but that’s only in hindsight. Longo was good at that point. Mark Vientos can be good too. For what it’s Wuertz, Prospect Itch has been down on Vientos for as long as Vientos has been down on the farm. For this year, do I want Mark Vientos in a redraft league? Absolutely, but back to the Buck shituation. He’s going to play where? DH? Okay, and Vogelbach is being benched indefinitely? By the  guy who is still playing the Phamily? No. That leaves Vientos, the Metsmaker, in a platoon. By the way, regarding the title: It’s because it causes Coke to explode. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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Domingo German was coasting once again, had the line 3 IP, 0 ER, ERA at 3.75, when he was ejected for sticky substance. Oh, Domingoo, you giant freakin’ moron. What’s the German word for hearing the Jays talk about the Yankees cheating and thinking, “Hey, that’s a good idea?” Fadenfraud. Also, this whole “touching a guy’s hand” to see if there’s anything on it is so hilariously stupid. Like touching a guy’s hand is scientific. The Handump’s Tale, a dystopian story of how one umpire touched things and was able to discern what on earth was on someone’s hand. “That’s chewing gum and the adhesive from a baby’s diaper.” Umps touching pitchers’ hands is like Name That Tune, but with touching. Domingo German, though, this guy’s a real bumbling idiot:

He’s like the kid who has ice cream all over his shirt then says, “I didn’t eat ice cream.” You’re covered in it, you absolute ding dong! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?