Here at Razzball we don’t believe in protesting a fantasy baseball trade, but we do fully support passive-aggressive, sarcastic belittling.  So if someone in your league passed a trade that makes you wish they passed a kidney stone, you’re in luck!  Here’s a Mad Libs-type tirade to post in league’s messageboard because when met with pettiness, retaliate with more pettiness.  Simply copy the below and fill in the appropriate words.  You may use this post to antagonize your closest friends, enemies or frenemies with the express written consent of  Also, feel free to post your version in the comments.

To Those That Passed That (adjective) Trade,

Hi, (Name) here.  Just wanted to state my thoughts on the trade of (Player(s) Traded Away) for (Player(s) Received).  I contemplated vetoing the trade.  Instead, I decided to voice my disagreement on this messageboard.  Though I do question the two trade partners’ ability to read something that isn’t scribbled in crayons.  On the bright side, the two (plural derogatory name) who were involved in the trade can use this post to practice their reading comprehension.  It’s not too late for that GED!

Since no one has the courtesy to respond to my trade offers, I figured you were too busy (verb) in your Mommy’s basement while eating hard candies like an addict freebases (drug).  Alas, I overestimated both of you.  You managed to put your collective (low number) IQs together and lower the integrity of the league like you have to lower your standards to date (plural farm animal).

So, doucetards, I have an idea.  How about the next time you two (plural derogatory name) get together you figure out the best way to do nothing with your (adjective) lives?  I hear Subway might have an opening to spin a sign on the street corner.  Then again, for that to work you probably have to know the meaning of clockwise.

The Guy Who Is Going To Beat Both Of You Like Your Step-Daddy Should Have,


P.S. Anyone need a closer?

  1. @poontycoon: Have Mauer @ C so dont really need Inge….dont see myself getting better value than maggs for him….yes, maggs had a slow start but he can still have a nice rest of the season?

    any other thoughts on inge and nyjer morgan for maggs? thanks

  2. Grey

    Grey says:

    @matthole: I don’t like Mags. Is there no one else to get?

  3. @Grey:

    Sure…experience in being crap, hes got lots of that. He just hasnt been any good since coming over, only reason hes on the roster is a lack of a better option. Really dont see it…and even if he was the closer I don’t think he’d be worth it, he’s just not good.

  4. Joe Cooper says:

    Yeah, I thought about posting something like this around week 2 when a guy in my league traded away Vlad and Valverde for Wandy and Jenks. I just about blew a gasket when I saw it was approved by both people and the league. Now I don’t even know what to think. Was he a lucky idiot, a crazed genius, or maybe his cat approved the trade by falling asleep on the keyboard.

  5. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Elijah: He got two saves about a week ago. He’s not the best option, but neither is Keven Gregg in Chicago.

    @Joe Cooper: Wow, crazed genius.

  6. Greg says:

    What if I offer Verlander\Hardy for Wandy Rodriguez\Rollins? Do you think that is fair?

  7. Andy says:

    I actually think that only the person who did the duping, not the dupee, should be yelled at. I am in a (not serious obvi!) league with my wife and the jerk commish of all people got her to trade Chris Carpenter at the beginning of the year for Melky Cabrera. While of course my wife got a gentle chiding, I did not want to risk my continued feeding and living in clean clothes, so I really did a number on the commish. Rarely do I make 13-year old boys cry like 10-year old girls. Rarely, but not nevar. This time, though, I did. The key is 3 parts mother-dissing, 1 part weight-mockery, and a smidgen of heterosexuality-questioning; that did the job quite nicely.

  8. BermudaTriangles says:

    Who do you prefer the rest of the way, HTH league: E Jax or R Wolf?

    And, is it close or is it not close? (I would have to trade for E Jax, vs signing Wolf as a FA)


  9. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Greg: It’s fair. I’d want the Rollins side.

    @Andy: Ha! Nice recipe.

    @BermudaTriangles: It’s close, just pickup Wolf.

  10. Doug Ault says:

    I’m getting an itchy finger wanting to move Damon and Inge.Damon I would flip for another OF’er,(cuz I think he’s peaked) Inge for much the same reason,but no specific need.What kinda return should I be aiming for with either of these two?

  11. Teef says:

    Who do you want the rest of the way (#1 bench option) Bj Upton or Maggs

  12. Scott says:

    @Teef: Upton, not even close.

  13. Kris says:

    @Grey: Thoughts on CC+Frank sq+Hawpe for Votto+Holliday+Kuroda? I’m giving CC, need Rs and HRs badly. should i ask for escobar?

  14. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Kris: I’d want the CC side. How about Frank + Hawpe for Votto?

  15. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Kris: Actually, I’m not sure I would even do that. Hawpe could beat Votto’s numbers. But you’re definitely giving up too much.

  16. SRM says:

    @Grey: Love the P.S.

    Also, who wins: Haren/C Davis vs. Miggy

    Haren vs. Gallardo

  17. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Kris: To give you an idea, Rudy traded Uggla and Cordero (might’ve been Franklin, I forget) for Votto. That seems fair. Obviously, depends on needs.

  18. Grey

    Grey says:

    @SRM: Miggy then Haren — But close.

  19. sean says:

    K. Escobar to start on Saturday. Worth a pickup?

  20. nick m. says:

    on the votto side of things, i just offered bruce and n. johnson for votto and jenks (or hoffman) to the same guy who i traded k.rod away for markakis, leaving me with only frank frank for saves. he just had sizemore go down further sapping his outfield, is plugging in derek lee at first, fighting with chipper’s toe at third, and waiting for soto to come around. not sure how desperate he is, but i figured i’d throw it out there. my 1B is a. gonz so i can wait on votto til his head is right then plug him into my util spot.

  21. Greg says:

    I have to drop one of these pitchers to get K. Escobar: Happ, Scott Baker, or Nick Blackburn. Also, start Escobar vs. DET or wait until a good start or two?

  22. mgeoffriau

    mgeoffriau says:

    With Dukes coming back tonight, should I drop Milton Bradley for Thome? He’s been crushing the ball the last week or so.

  23. martin says:

    what do u think of hairston from SD? can he be a breakout ludwick like player?

  24. mgeoffriau

    mgeoffriau says:

    @Greg: I’d drop Blackburn….limited upside compared to Happ and Baker. I’m going to watch at least 1 start before playing Escobar, as he wasn’t sharp in his final rehab start.

  25. Kris says:

    @ Grey: As always, thanks for the input. I just have a really itchy trigger finger and am starved for HRs. Maybe I’ll go all out for Howard…

    Also, the Mama Fratelli is great, but your “Owen doesn’t have a friend” was the funniest line i’d read all year.

  26. Grey

    Grey says:

    @sean: Sure

    @mgeoffriau: I wouldn’t drop Bradley.

    @martin: Search Hairston on the top left.

    @Kris: Hehe… Thanks!

  27. IowaCubs

    IowaCubs says:

    Your postscript is one of the finest I’ve ever read. It’s up there with “P.S. The condom broke” and “P.S. I love your sister more than you.”

  28. nmdunkel says:

    Grey, I really needed that laugh. Thanks. That’s worth a martini right there.

  29. ThePoonTycoon says:

    @matthole: you trusting mauer to stay healthy? inge can be a serviceable C, 3B, CI, UTIL backup/fill-in should injuries hit. unless you just have a need elsewhere that you are filling by trading inge, i wouldn’t trade him just for the sake of trading him.

    i’m like grey, i wouldn’t touch maggs.

  30. Anthony G says:

    HAHAhahaha… sleep with plural farm animals

  31. Bob says:

    @Grey: Your post is hilarious. I wish I had it for the Lester/Kendrick for Ian Kinsler trade that went through in one of my leagues this year.

    Speaking of trades, I’ve negotiated it to my Votto, Ryan Franklin and Juan Pierre for his Berkman and Abreu. He may want me to sweeten it with G. Soto, but this is the one catcher Yahoo league where I also have Russell Martin. What do you think?

  32. Chase says:

    @Grey: I haven’t read the comments in a while, but it seems to me that people either ignore or havent heard of the Razz forums.

  33. Doug Ault says:

    @Grey: I offered Inge plus Beltre for Ludwick

  34. Ham says:

    Sending John Maine for Scott Downs sound about right?

  35. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Chase: I think sometimes it’s just easier for people to get a quick answer in the comments.

    @Doug Ault: Cool

    @Ham: Yeah, sounds fair.

    EDIT: Words.

  36. Tom says:

    That was awesome. Thanks for the laugh. Long long ago, when I asked about the Francisco for Valverde/Downs, I was thinking Frank Frank, but I do have Liriano. My league is Closers-Crazy, so they love those gaudy numbered effective closers a lot. Frank Frank has looked good.

  37. @grey: he wont trade dye/cruz…seems like maggs or nothing (re: n.morgan and inge for maggs)….

    i dont start morgan or inge and would start maggs…or would u hold off another few weeks or so…trades hardly happen and roster changes are weekly….


  38. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Tom: Ah… I’d stick with Frank-Frank.

    @matthole: Mags is better than two bench guys, so if that’s your only option, go for it. There’s no other teams to trade with?

  39. SamYo says:

    There’s this trade in my league, Lackey & Price for Chone Figgins.
    He rejected my Lowe/Sandoval offer.

    by the way, great stuff, funny post.

  40. martin says:

    @grey- i search hairston… so how would u rank k.johnson, hairston, and ja haap. I have hill at 2nd and my pitching is decent and my OF is solid

  41. im either in a shitty league or im just a lot more competitive than everyone else…guys near the bottom of the standings havent made pickups in a bit, but strong 8 out of 12….

    also, everyones convinced that their players are all awesome and legit and easily rip apart or discount other teams guys….ie someone has scutaro and wont trade him for less than a stud…counters with an offer for haren and says i wont pay much for him bc hes known for being a second half slumper….they twist it so it works out for them….so essentially you have to “lose” a trade if you really want to get a guy

  42. Grey

    Grey says:

    @SamYo: Thanks! I’d prefer the Lackey/Price one too.

    @martin: Apples and oranges, but Hairston for UTIL.

    @matthole: Yeah, this happens. I have a ‘pert league where a guy is in last place and refuses to part with his closers even though he’s starting Brent Lillibridge.

  43. Tom says:

    What about Frank Frank and Kubel for Bailey and Victorino?

  44. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Tom: I’d want Victorino.

  45. James says:

    Hal MaCoy, a Hall of Fame baseball writer, who covers the Reds doesn’t seem to think this latest injury to Volquez is serious. Apparently, it only happened during one pitch, and Volquez was able to finish the inning using his curve ball. In his opinion, he was taken out for precautionary reasons.

  46. James says:

    Edit: McCoy

  47. Grey

    Grey says:

    @James: Is it required Hall of Famers are called that, like maestros? Hopefully, Hal’s right. And not wrong like he was for Griffey coming back to Cincy and Votto only being out for a day or two. Guess we’ll see.

  48. James says:

    No, but it sounds nicer doesn’t it?

    Votto seems to be dealing with issues other than his ear infection, which McCoy couldn’t be expected to know about.

  49. Grey

    Grey says:

    @James: He’s a hall of famer, he’s gotta know everything! (Insert appropriate emoticon)

  50. SamYo says:

    So I lost out on figgins, are there any other speedy infielders I could target ? (The players I’d prefer to trade are Jurjens, David Price, Ibanez)

  51. James says:

    @Grey: Well, Hall of Fame indicates he has been there for a while and thus would probably mean he knows everything. Right? Are you having a bad day or something? I was just trying to inform anyone who read what I saw that this guy isn’t some rookie reporter who doesn’t have access.

  52. James says:

    @Grey: Sorry if my post wasn’t helpful – ill make sure not to post anything in the future if this is the type of response I receive after just trying to help everyone out. Good luck in the future!

  53. Andy R. says:

    Hi Grey. Long time listener, first time caller…

    With Mauer at C, what do you think about a Wieters for Cantu trade?

    In my league, Wieters wasnt added until after his first game – so its not like I have been sitting on him for 2 months just to trade him. And with Dizzy V down for now I need someone to pair with Miggy since C.Davis isnt cutting it for me.

    Also, I imagine you get MLB Extra Innings or, so who is your favorite announcing duo?

  54. J.P. says:

    The thing about Garrett Atkins is the new Rockies manager is batting him in the cleanup spot, current batting average be damned …

    definately interesting

  55. Grey

    Grey says:

    @SamYo: Maybe Jurrjens for Roberts?

    @James: I was kidding. Sorry it didn’t come across that way. I appreciated the update.

    @Andy R.: I’d take Cantu there. I like the Mets guys a lot, but I’d have to go with Sutton and Grace as my favorite team. Though I don’t think anyone compares to Vin Scully.

    @J.P.: Yeah, Atkins has more upside than Morales too. Obviously wouldn’t have been great to have him this whole time.

    EDIT: Word.

  56. Steve says:

    No Beltran again today. Sore tummy.

  57. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Steve: Ugh, gotta change my lineups.

  58. Steve says:

    @Grey: Same. Mat Gamel, come on down!

    Not in my H2H, though. My bench there? Aramis, Votto, Ianetta.

  59. Ashley says:

    Umm.. So have you heard that Beltran and Maine might have the swine flu??

    The Mets can’t catch a break I guess.

  60. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Steve: Walking wounded, eh?

    @Ashley: Ugh… Really? That’s annoying. I blame Votto.

  61. Ashley says:

    The New York Post reports that a member of the Mets’ TV broadcast team is in a Pittsburgh hospital with what could be a case of swine flu.

    Carlos Beltran is out of the lineup for a third straight game with what is being called a stomach virus, but the Mets don’t believe that he is suffering from the swine flu. We’ll continue to follow this story as more news becomes available.

  62. Steve says:

    @Grey: Yeah. Beats me how I’m 9 games clear in first…

  63. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Ashley: That’s insane. Hmm… Guess I’ll blame Keith Hernandez.

  64. Zebo says:

    is the Harang honeymoon over?

  65. Doug Ault says:

    @Grey: Is Brandon Boggs worth picking up?

    The Rangers brought him up in case Josh goes on the DL

  66. Mr Baseball says:

    I Protest Your Trade – thanks for your response Grey
    P.S. Anyone need a closer? – to make the trade fair – Don Cornelius was just added to the Pot

    # 6 Mr Baseball (86 comments) Says:
    June 2nd, 2009 at 5:47 am
    look at this trade in one of my leagues – It makes you want to throw up! am I overreacting

    Daisuke Matsuzaka and Randy Johnson and Don Cornelius
    for Ryan Howard

    please tell what is there to like about Daisuke Matsuzaka – he has shown nothing so far this year except his love for the DL and the league is hitting .385 against him – I might not be no expect here but he is making everyone look like Ty Cobb with those numbers
    his era and whip is terrible

    Randy Johnson is now a 5 inning pitcher that is inconsistant – yes Randy can give you strike outs but how many will you get for 5 innings of work – and how many wins can you get out of him

    his era and whip is terrilble

    Don Cornelius – the host of soul train – does not have a dead arm

  67. Doug Ault says:

    @Mr Baseball: Is it that lopsided?

    Dice K has had like 3 starts,Sabathia doesn’t even start pitching until june

  68. Zebo says:

    @Grey: you don’t think we are going to look at 2 months of Harangsuckathon?

  69. timSTi says:

    @Grey: Got offered Lincecum & M.Young for my Pujols & E.Andrus. It’s tempting but thats a veto right? I have no worthwhile replaced at 1B and the FA pool isn’t too flooded right now. SS is by far my weakest position though.

  70. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Zebo: Nah, I think he should be okay, unless he gets injured.

    @timSTi: Don’t trade Pujols if you can’t replace him with something worthwhile.

  71. timSTi says:

    #Grey: Thanks. Thats what I needed to hear. Maybe if I substitute A-Rod in Pujols’ spot?

  72. Ashley says:

    Any chance Nolasco returns from the minors new and improved? Should I give him a shot?

    I don’t really have anyone to drop though.. Andrew Bailey I guess.

  73. BSA says:

    OK, bring in more gurneys, my DL is overflowing – Reyes, Iannetta, and now Hamilton. Escobar was my own doing to try and scoop before Steve, and Hippo, and Iowa, and….

  74. Grey

    Grey says:

    @timSTi: A-Rod would make a difference.

    @Ashley: If you have room, but I wouldn’t drop Bailey for him.

  75. SamYo says:

    Hamilton could be out for 2 months.

  76. BSA says:

    @SamYo: bite your tongue and hope for good drugs.

  77. Mann of Sandd says:

    Trade Bruce at $3 (can be kept 3 additional years at $+4 a year) and Porcello at $3 (4 additional years, escalating +$4 a year starting in 2011) for Ellsbury at $3 (same as Bruce) and Gallardo at $7 (can be kept one more year at +4) in a keeper? I need steals if I’m going to have any chance to win this year, but don’t know if I can stomach giving up 4 years of Porcello for 1 1/2 of Yovani

  78. BigFatHippo says:

    @BSA: Feel your pain, though if it’s in the groin area I won’t feel your pain, but you know what I mean…

    Reyes, Sizemore and Webb on my DL in the keeper. Ugh

    @Grey: Nice post, just hope someone makes a lopsided deal in our league so I can use it. That oughta shake things up cause nobody is talking right now (cept Al, but he’s always talking).

  79. Greg says:

    Watching Nick Johnson run… priceless.

  80. BSA says:

    @BigFatHippo: That Hamilton ‘formerly of team Hippo’ Grrrrrrr…..
    He’s screwed 1. oblique, 2. ab pain, 3. groin – all connected with no acute spot. Damn!

    I’m not a doctor in real life but I act like it here.

  81. BigFatHippo says:

    @BSA: Don’t know how cute his oblique, abs and groin are Dr Summerdog, I’m just glad he’s your pain in the ……..

  82. BSA says:

    @BigFatHippo: Who is a pain in my….?

    Got any other trades in that head of yours?

    On the wrong day Steve asked about Markakis……

  83. Drev says:

    Which side in a league where starting pitching is a bit more valuable than usual:

    Lincecum and Holliday


    Braun, Josh Johnson, and Huston Street

  84. Steve says:

    @BSA: Yeah, I guess you’re holding him now!

  85. BSA says:

    @Steve: I got nothing else. Still digging rocks out of my knees from slamming into the basement this weekend.

  86. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Drev: I’d take the Lincecum side, but it’s close.

  87. BigFatHippo says:

    @BSA: Don’t know, I’ll check. Need pitching of course. You want Liriano? I’ll trade him for a dozen doughnuts, got a couple cops I need to bribe.

  88. BSA says:

    @BigFatHippo: Liriano would be the cherry on top of it all. I think I am about to drink your beer.

  89. Steve says:

    Crazy old roto. All my team has done so far today is go 0-3 and I’ve lost three points!

  90. big o says:

    asdrubal just popped his left shoulder …. 1st inning .

    nathan for cueto ….. ??
    done deal … need re-assurance .

  91. Grey

    Grey says:

    @big o: Sure, it’s fair.

  92. Greg says:

    Drop Dukes, Bourn, or Reimold for LaRoche who is a 2nd half hitter?

  93. Joel says:

    Randy Wells is pitching well again..

    Is he worth a sniff? Looking at his fangraphs, he seems to have added the slider to his regular repetoire, making him a 3-pitch guy (as opposed to the 2-pitch reliever he was last year). Moreover, the pitch/FX indicates that it’s his slider that’s getting outs.

    His G/F ratio is ridiculous, Derek Lowe-ish. His HR/FB ratio is obviously going to go up (historically ~1 HR/9) but if his G/F is ~3:1 then that really doesn’t hurt him that much. My question is:

    Is the control for real?
    Is the G/F sustainable?
    Worth a sniff?

  94. Steve says:

    Why does Padilla keep throwing at Tex?

  95. BigFatHippo says:

    @Joel: Shhhh, turn your hat sideways, he’s doing the unspeakable right now.

    Toss salt over your shoulder, avoid ladders and cats, kiss the Blarney Stone, throw pennies in the well, etc……

  96. BigFatHippo says:

    @Steve: Maybe Tex made eyes at his ol lady, I’d throw at Tex right now too. Course, my 55 mph heater wouldn’t do much damage.

  97. sean says:

    Tex is fired up. It’s fun to watch

  98. Swass says:

    @Joel: Why’d you have to say his name?

  99. Joel says:

    @Swass: Apologies, I had no idea what R. David Wells was doing when I posted that.

  100. Ham says:

    Anyone catch why Tulo was taken out of the game?

  101. Ham says:

    @Ham: found it sorry – Troy Tulowitzki of the Rockies left the game in the 4th inning after suffering an apparent hand injury.

  102. I'm Keith Hernandez says:

    @Grey: Don’t blame me loving coke and mexican “escorts!” Also is dropping hart for hairston ok?

  103. sean says:

    @Ham: hopefully the bum hand will stop him from continuing to fist me with his terrible play. is it the same hand as last year?

  104. I'm Keith Hernandez says:

    @Grey: my publicist says “Ladies of the night” Obey my mustache!

  105. timSTi says:

    @Grey: So I’m still trying to work with that guy to get Lincecum. The latest possibility looks like this: Lincecum & Lowell for my A-Rod & either 1 of Bell/Slowey/Volstad/Wolf/Volquez. Any of those guys make the trade less in my favor? We have 2 RP and my team currently has Soria, Bell, & Wilson. Other than the aforementioned SP’s I have Bills and Gollardo. Whatcha think?

  106. Grey

    Grey says:

    @I’m Keith Hernandez: Ha!

    @timSTi: I’d do the trade for any of those guys. I’d rank them Bell, Volstad, Volquez, Wolf, Slowey…

  107. Anyone know if Hanley was taken out of the game because of the blow out or the lingering injuries? Thanks

  108. I'm Keith Hernandez says:

    Howell closing out the ninth in a 6-2 game….. take anything away from it?

  109. timSTi says:

    @Grey: Ok thanks Grey!

  110. brad says:


    You gave me advice a few days ago about my Rios and M. Gonzalez for his Quentin in a keep 6 roto league.

    He’s ready to pull the trigger now, still like it now that Quentin is on the DL?

  111. SamYo says:

    Who’d you start tomorrow, Beltre or Lowell ?

  112. SamYo says:

    and is it safe to start Randy Johnson tomorrow against the Nats ?

  113. Steve says:

    @Grey: I hate starting pitchers.

  114. @SamYo: I have these same two third basemen. I am going to start flipping a coin, I think. Or, some how figuring a rotation of them that is completely out of my control.

  115. Grey

    Grey says:

    @brad: I don’t think you need to give up both guys now, but I still like it. I think Quentin will be fine.

    @SamYo: Lowell

    @SamYo: Yes on Randy, but risky.

    @Steve: Ugh, I know.

  116. Steve says:

    WTF’s happened to Peavy?

  117. SamYo says:

    Mauer homered again.

  118. SamYo says:

    @Steve: Hes going against Bastardo soo .. (bad pun there)

  119. I'm Keith Hernandez says:

    WTF happened to Peavy?!!!!!!

  120. Peavy doesn’t want to go to Philly so he is making sure they realize not to trade for him.

  121. Flu for peavy according to Phillies announcers according to a Phillies blog.

  122. Upton hits the Salami!

  123. Dexter says:

    So, what are people’s takes on Liriano? I have a few Brain Freezes (Hannerhannerhan, Capps, Hawkins and Valverde) and Nathan. Worth trading Capps for Liriano, if I need pitching? I also need MI with speed. Who do you think I should trade/target?

  124. Mike says:

    *16-team, mixed, H2H-Points*

    I own Tulo and Soto. I’m done with them.

    Trade Lind for:

    (1) Hardy & Doumit
    (2) Zobrist & Napoli

  125. Swass says:

    Sweet Lou pulls Wells with 80 pitches in the 8th, hands the ball over to the Dominican Crazy Horse who did his usual walk and HBP routine, then turns it over to the guy who has 2 first names, but spells the second one in that uppity way. Gregg is the equivalent to Geoff. Long story short…Piniella’s senility has struck again and cost Randy Wells ANOTHER win.

  126. Mike says:

    or (3) Lind for Y. Escobar & Napoli?

  127. Nick says:

    @Grey: Thanks for the advice, benching Peavy! Saved me a headache and Slowey + Bedard are working out well today. Once I get some $ in my paypal I’ll definitely be sending some donations your way. I’m currently in 1st in a 10 team league. 2nd place is 11 games behind! Too bad were not playing for money, just bragging rights

  128. RogerDorn says:

    @ grey:

    i need a replacement 1b for longoria (if he misses some time with hamstring)…or a 1b (as i have miggy cabrera who can play 1b/3b)….

    who do you like thats avail on my waiver wire?

    willy aybar, billy butler, rolen, Ryan roberts(Ari)


  129. Denys says:


  130. Cotton says:

    That P.S. is some funny shizz! They eliminated Save Opps (which was bs) from our H2H scoring this yr, so closers have ONE category. I’m riding all mid RPs for innings and no one’s noticed yet. I’d call them morons, except I’ve been beaten more than once.
    Kinda wish I had a closer to deal… but not that much!
    Son Risin’,

  131. @Grey:

    Happ seems like a good play tomorrow yes?

  132. vinko says:

    Street is up to his usual shizz!

  133. The Gangster of Glove says:

    Frank Frank for J. Upton, or Qualls for Bruce. I would be gettin the hitters

  134. DrEasy says:

    A mild sonavabench to Dice-K, but I’m just glad he pitched well for once. And glad I didn’t stream for David Hernandez!

  135. DrEasy says:

    I’m not sure what this means, but Adrian Gonzalez has as many HRs as Ellsbury has steals (22).

  136. big o says:

    re-posting here ….. ibanez … mvp

  137. big o says:

    disagree on street .

  138. Juice says:

    @Grey: So how about you write me a witty little letter to send to a league mate who just absolute refuses to reply to trade offers and/or rejects and refuses to counter offer. Thank you kindly.

  139. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Juice: Ha, okay, maybe next week.

  140. @Grey:

    Early Schleref report: He’s looking like he’s gonna pitch the 9th instead of Pena?!

  141. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Elijah: Yeah, I’m watching right now. I really hope Pena doesn’t give up any runs though. I’m having a miserable ERA/WHIP day.

  142. DrEasy says:

    If he does though, we’d find out if Qualls is a go.

  143. DrEasy says:

    If he does though, we could find out if Qualls is a go. :p

  144. I still suspect, longterm if not this year, Schleref is gonna be the closer in AZ. He is a 1st round pick and was fast tracked to the majors. MOB (ari) AA 15AP 0-0 1.42ERA 19IP 9h 13bb 21k 3sv 1.16

  145. Grey

    Grey says:

    @DrEasy: Yeah, kinda prefer not to know.

  146. @DrEasy:

    Qualls is officially *not* a go.

  147. @Grey:
    Told ya Pena is Not a Closer.

  148. DrEasy says:

    Doh, bases loaded! (disclaimer: I own both Pena and Qualls)

  149. Here comes Schleref!!!

  150. DrEasy says:

    He better be good, my ERA depends on him!!!

  151. Steve says:

    @Grey: I hear ya.

    Lost 7.5 points in the RCL so far today, mainly thanks to Wolf and Peavy.

    Pena not helping now, obviously.

  152. Steve says:

    So what do we do with Pena now?

  153. Schleref is *ahem* effectively wild.

  154. Greg says:

    Hart – sonovabench!

  155. DrEasy says:

    What happened? Yahoo is slow to update.

  156. @Steve:

    I would drop Pena. I dont know much about fantasy baseball but I know the Dbacks.

  157. Its 5-2 bases loaded 2 out

  158. tie game…

  159. Grey

    Grey says:

    I’m going to stick me head in the oven.

  160. Doh.

  161. DrEasy says:

    No f***** way!!!

  162. Greg says:

    I’m happy that the guy I’m playing against started Pena!

  163. DrEasy says:

    I don’t know about “effectively” wild…

  164. Poor Haren.

  165. Steve says:

    Actually, that’s 8.5 points I’ve lost now.

  166. @DrEasy:

    Well tough spot for a guy in his 3rd game in the big leagues. I like the kid I think he’ll be good.

  167. Elbert says:

    kill me Schleref…

  168. Greg says:

    Ibanez is unreal this year.

  169. DrEasy says:

    Make it two wild pitches… So who’s gonna be the closer now? Should I drop Pena? Or better wait a day or two?

  170. Grey

    Grey says:

    @DrEasy: I dropped Pena before the last earned run came around.

  171. Qualls is gonna be the closer. Hes just out a few days. No one else is worth the risk imo.

  172. DrEasy says:

    Is it Schleref or Schelereth (that’s how Yahoo spells it)? I wanna make sure when I make that voodoo doll later tonight.

  173. Its Schlereth.

  174. Wasnt really his fault Pena walked the bases loaded…

  175. DrEasy says:

    You guys are harsh though. Pena has been great all year. 5 W, 6H, good WHIP, good ERA. Until tonight that is. Is it something you know that I don’t?

  176. Greg says:

    Wieters needs his first HR here…

  177. I like Pena alot, as a setup guy. Hes just not suited to closing games, he gets wild and/or hangs sliders.

  178. @DrEasy:
    If holds count in your league sure, keep him.

  179. DrEasy says:

    The thing is, I don’t like that sore forearm thing that Qualls has. Accardo supposedly had it last year and he ended up missing all of last season. I believe Litsch has the same thing, and he’s been out a month or so. But maybe that’s just JP Ricciardi bluffing about his pitchers as usual.

  180. DrEasy says:

    @Elijah: They do, but then again there’s plenty of fish when it comes to holds. A cursory look in my FA pool gives: Angel Guzman, Stetter, Mujica, Jim Johnson. I just wanted to keep Pena as a handcuff, especially now that there’s uncertainty around Qualls.

  181. Steve says:


    I dropped Madson to get Pana and Madson gets a cheap save.

    I hate this game.

  182. DrEasy says:

    @Steve: Ouch, that’s a double whammy. Yeah, looks like things got a little hairy in San Diego too, but Philly got out of it.

  183. Doug Ault says:

    @Grey: The Bastardo era has begun, behold the glory!

  184. Prince says:

    @Grey, great writeup as usual. Loved yesterday’s especially.

    Who’s the best catcher from here on out? — Ianetta, Napoli, Doumit, Snyder, Baker, Salty. Carlos Ruiz has been playing well but I don’t know much about him.

    Also, slim pickings for UTIL / someone to take Hamilton’s spot. Anyone stand out as being better than the rest? — Juan Rivera, Rowand, Thome, Reimold, Cody Ross, Ben Francisco, Konerko, Rasmus. Thanks!

  185. Griff says:

    @Steve: I’m with you Steve. I was sitting on Uncle Pena’s lap and he….he…touched me.

  186. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Doug Ault: Hehe

    @Prince: Thanks! I’d take Iannetta for the rest of the season. Snyder for right now.

    I’d take Reimold.

    @Griff: Ha!

  187. Rob says:

    which side do you like better in this trade:

    sizemore and votto for a. gonzo and a. bailey?



  188. DJ says:

    My OF stinks. (Ludwick, Mclouth, Pierre so I will need someone in 3 weeks) I have been offered Felix Hernandez and Werth for Lincecum. The King seems to drop some real bombs… or he may win the Mr Young trophy. Wise man says?

  189. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Rob: Sizemore side.

    @DJ: I wouldn’t make that trade.

    *******Take followups to the newest post******

  190. Brandon says:

    Someone used this trade protest post in one of my leagues!!! Grey, you must have a large following…

  191. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Brandon: Ha, that’s very funny. If you want, copy their version into the comments here.

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