So Grey lost his stache in a tragic sparkler related accident, but did manage to partially recover the remnants and is having them reattached as we speak, so I’m going to fill in for him on this sacred of holidays, July 5th.

If you have ever seen or heard of the NFL or smelled a jock strap at any point, then you might want to check out what is going down over on my side of the tracks. We’ve got all kinds of hootenannies and shin-digs about to be gettin up and gettin down, so don’t just hole up over here! Venture out into the world and stop by and and take a load off on the Razzball Football porch, there’ll be lightning bugs and we’ll be drinking rot gut out of a mason jar.

Now that the self promotion is over, read my invaluable thoughts on what happened in Major League Baseball yesterday:

Freddie Freeman: Freddie freed the ball from it’s oppressor, the stadium, twice to celebrate Independence Day. Grey’s pick for NL Rookie of the Year is on pace to be in the running. Those were his 10th and 11th homers so he’s on pace for 78 home runs, oh, let me go over those numbers again, make that, hmmm, so if they play 164 games he’d be on pace for 22 home runs, and if you lop off those 2 games in which he would probably have hit like 8 homers, that would put him on pace for 14.

Mark Reynolds: Mini Donkey hit 2 homers yesterday and just missed a third and is as hot as a donkey can be sans the Tijuanian hooker. Five donks in the last 3 games is ok if you are into that kind of thing.

Rajai Davis: Could the call up of Travis Snider have set a fire under Davis? Well, two games in and you’d have to say yes. And with that kind of sample size there’s no way you can go wrong! I had high hopes for him before the season started and my hopes continued to get lower and lower until they got lower than a slug’s belly, so he can’t really go anywhere but up and going 5 for 9 with 4 stolen bases in the last 2 games is up.

Troy Tulowitzki: He strained his quad and looks like he will be out a couple days. The last time I was at the quad it was to do a little hacky-sacking. Right now they are looking at a couple days rest, but you never know! Be afraid!! Or not, it’s just a game.

Travis Snider: He was called up and quickly hit 3 doubles. Three triples would have been more poetic, but hey, you take what you can get.  But be careful, this dude has a TCAP Stache.

Alex Presley: With Jose Tabata out, Alex has yet to leave the building and the with the way he is playing he may not. He is 12 for 33 since being called up with 6 RBIs and 2 stolen bases. Tabata should be back in a week-ish so don’t get too googly-eyed, but you two could have a magical week together! Send me a postcard.

Pablo Sandoval: The panda dog seems to have gotten his power back. He went 3 for 5 with a panda donk yesterday and has hit in 15 straight games and an extra-base hit in 9 games in a row. And if you find a picture of a panda dog wearing sandals give me a holler.

Emilio Bonafacio: Emily Facebone (rough translation) is sagnoffin like crazy. He has 6 stolen bases in the last 6 games and he happens to be hitting a little as well, which probably helps him get on base and thus steal bases. He is 10 for his last 28.

Adrian Beltre: Yesterday he went 2 for 5 with a home run and he’s gone  9 for his last 16 with 5 runs and 7 RBIs.  If you add all that up it spells, well, nothing because numbers don’t usually add up to words.

Brian Duensing: In his first 4 starts he gave up an America, Eff Yeah-sized 21 runs in 20.2 innings. A run an inning does not look too good on the resume. Since then he has given up 10 runs in his last 7 starts for a much more career builder friendly 2.45 ERA, and a 4-2 record. The competition has been somewhat iffy, so he’s still in spot starterville, but I’m keeping my eye on him.

Ricky Nolasco: He has RickNolled anyone who even thought about owning him, but he has looked better of late. It’s a good sign that he held the Phillies to one run yesterday, but of course the Marlins don’t really care to score runs that often.

Danny Valencia: O Valencia! He’s setting the city on fire! He’s 11 for his last 25 with 2 homers and 9 RBIs in the last 6 games. Will he keep this up? Hmm, maybe, maybe not. What am I, some kind of psychic! But I picked him up in a league where David Wright is taking his own sweet time coming back. Third base is a gaping hole of doom.

Adam Dunn: Big Ass decided to go all Big Donkey for the night and hit a home run and got his second hit off a lefty all season (that raised his average against lefties to .036). This of course coincides with me dropping him. I’m skeptically pessimistic.

Mike Napoli: He’s off the DL and got a hit in his first at bat back. That’s good news.

  1. Racehorse says:


    “Skeptically pessimistic” … hahaha, that’s a keeper. The royalty checks are in the mail.

    Do you (or anyone) know Juan Nicasio’s ceiling?

  2. Racehorse says:


    One more… I keep seeing that, despite the good start, the long term prognosis for Alex Presley is that he’s a 4th outfielder.

    What about Charlie Blackmon’s ceiling?


  3. 626 Jack says:

    Doc, nice work.

    What are your thoughts on Vance Worley?

  4. SpecialFNK says:

    unfortunately Bonifacio got ejected in the 5th or he could have done even ore damage.

    is Freddie Freeman good enough to be a starting 1B for the rest of the season? or should I trade for someone better? not much better on waivers. Mark Trumbo is there, would he be better? I could drop Eric Thames(or Freeman) for Trumbo. there’s also Mitch Moreland, Matt LaPorta, Brett Wallace, Ike Davis, Derrek Lee, Anthony Rizzo. the only other person I could really drop is maybe Danny Espinosa since Brandon Phillips is my 2B, but I’d rather trade Espinosa.

  5. MrHappyTime says:

    Bernadina, T Snider, E Thames, or Bonifacio ? Also J Weeks or Ackley for MI? Thanks!

  6. Scott says:

    Pence/Stauffer or Ethier/D.Hudson?

  7. AL KOHOLIC says:

    good job DOC

  8. joe says:

    Bartlett, Bonifacio, casilla, or A.Escobar at SS?


  9. joe says:

    Or Furcal?

  10. Will says:

    Valencia or Moustakas for ROY? I need someone to play while Zimmerman is struggling

  11. Trevor

    Tggq21 says:

    Love it Doc!

  12. timSTi says:

    Doc, we think alike. I snagged Boneaface & Valencia off waivers yesterday. Might be the first time I’ve one-upped the razzball daily writeups!

  13. Salty Balty says:

    Would you start Chacin tonight in Atl? His recent struggles leave me with some doubts . . .

  14. Steve Stevenson says:

    Would you deal Votto for Holliday and V-Mart? Holliday would replace Votto at Util, V-Mart would replace Iannetta. Having the extra OF would also allow me to drop Swisher for Espinosa as my bench bat/Utley insurance. Shallow (10-team) H2H league with limited pickups, but no limit on trades.

  15. Chris says:

    I was offered Jose Valverde, An Sanchez p fl, and ryan roberts for colby rasmus and trevor cahill would you make that trade? 10 team keeper head to head. I would drop latroy hawkins in the rp spot. We can keep 12 players.

  16. stynyr says:

    Possibly looking to deal Rollins for Gallardo. What are people’s thoughts on Reyes? Rollins is great to slot in for Reyes but if Reyes is fine and continues his hot season, I’d prefer having a possible 200 K starter to having Rollins on my bench.

  17. stynyr says:

    That said, Grey, Rollins for Gallardo?

  18. Wilsonian says:

    Doc, I’m wondering your opinion on a couple things. I’m in a shallow 8 Team H2H keeper league where you typically win by not playing the best players, but the hottest ones. We also keep 5 of whatever you want (which would be Fielder, Longoria, Kemp, CarGo, Verlander as of now).

    Right now I’ve got Espinosa, Longoria, and Heyward forgetting that they’re supposed to use that wooden club thing to hit that little white leather ball where those other 9 guys aren’t.

    Valencia, Kelly Jo, and Hill are hanging out on the WW right now. I’ve got 4 closers for the time being (K-Rod, Walden, Santos, D.Hernandez). Would you drop any of Espinosa, D.Hernandez, Heyward for Valencia, Kelly Jo, or Hill? I’ve tried dealing Heyward, but I’m getting no bites at all.

  19. stynyr says:


    Give up Rollins for Gallardo?

  20. Matt (Cleveland) says:

    12 team mixed league, I traded Hanley for Jered Weaver….Is this another mistake by the Lake? I sorely needed pitching.

  21. Morgan, Freddie's Brotha says:

    Valencia has been giving sneaky good value at 3B this year, very underrated at a position as deep as a July 4th kiddy pool.

    Drop, Trade, or Hold (Stash) these following players?
    Billy Butler, Max Scherzer, Ricky Nolasco, Francisco Liriano

    12 team 5×5 h2h.

    I’m currently thinking about dropping Butler outright for Smoak or Hosmer, both of whom got recently dropped. Hold onto Scherzer and Liriano? and try to trade Nolasco?

  22. Matt Damon says:

    I’m debating whether or not to drop Scherzer… I’ve got decent pitching already and there are some decent guys on waivers:

    Luebke, Leake, Vargas, Karstens, Minor, Maholhm (did I really just name 2 Pirates SPs??)…. any suggestions?

  23. EG says:

    Wigginton, Freese or Valencia as a 3B replacement for Wright? Got Wigg in there now. Thanks.

  24. theguarantee says:

    Volqkuez tonight @STL? 16 team league, start or sit?

    And is it ok to put Dunn back in the lineup for Smoak (who also had two hits breaking out of a slump last night) or should I expect him to go right back to 0-4 with 3 K’s tonight?

  25. Steve Jeltz says:

    All opinions welcome,
    I currently have Cargo and Reyes D2D. I could move Carlos Lee to get Alexei Ramirez to fill in for Reyes and Masterson for Boesch to replace Lee/Cargo. Should I make these moves? Or should I stick it out until Reyes/Cargo return? Neither Lee or Masterson are much more then depth on my team.

  26. Hardcore Midget says:

    Napoli activated from the DL last night, and of course he doesn’t draw the start.

    Am I better off with Napoli at C, getting the random starts whenever Washington feels like penciling him in, or do I keep rolling out AJ Pierzynski, who we know will get 5 starts a week going forward.

  27. Fletch says:

    Wigginton or Pagan?

  28. Will says:

    stubbs for Reynolds???

    my current team – wieters, Fielder, Cano, Reyes, Zimmerman, Bruce, Stubbs, CarGo, Morse, Lind, Markakis, Sizemore, Crawford, Tabata, and Moustakas.

    Any thoughts?

    Another thought would be just to drop moustakas for valencia and keep stubbs

  29. Hey Grey, who would you rather have going forward Travis Snider or JJ Hardy?

  30. Will says:

    Also, Cargo or Braun as a keeper?

  31. OaktownSteve says:

    @Wilsonian: If I were consulting on your situation, the first thing I’d ask is are you looking good for the playoffs or is it going to be a struggle. If you’re solid overall and you like your chances, stand pat. How much would you hate yourself if one of those guys was the hot guy come playoffs and you dumped him in July? If you’re on the outside looking in, then you have to chase some hot guys now.

  32. MrHappyTime says:

    Thames or his teammate Snider for the rest of the season?

  33. airweino says:

    26 team dynasty league: I get Kemp with a franchise tag for Josh Johnson, Kendrys Morales and Travis Snider.


  34. joe says:

    Need a SS… should I try to trade away heyward for jj hardy?

  35. Would people go Lucroy or Posada going forward? Think Jorge has re-found his stroke?

  36. Homer Jay says:

    @ Everyone:

    My Wright for his Ubaldo??

  37. Howard says:

    Hi Doc! Furcal or Bonifacio?

  38. Wilsonian says:

    Mini-Mini Donkey could be on way to ATL to play tonight. Thought I’d give ya the head’s up…and now try to figure out who to drop for him.

  39. airweino says:

    12 team mixed keeper league: Goldschmidt or Viciedo for Kipnis?

  40. Racehorse says:

    I guess Doc had to make a house call…

  41. bobbo says:

    Who do you like for rest of season (OBP instead of AVG, and K’s as cats):

    Smoak vs. Moustakas

  42. The Burghler says:

    12 team head to head 7×7 with ops/ks

    Adam Jones or Cuddyer rest of season?

  43. Richie says:

    Albert Pujols has been cleared to play today after fracturing his wrist just 2 weeks ago!

    Holy crap!

  44. Higgins says:

    Receiving ARAM, Beckett and Andrew McCutchen for Miguel Cabrera, Santos and Farnsworth. Need pitching, runs and steals. At the top in saves. Should I pull the trigger?

  45. L-Boogie says:

    Thoughts on Jay Bruce for ROS. Good time to buy low?

    Thanks dude.

  46. Calogero says:

    Which is a better deal? 12 team H2H 6×6 keeper

    A. Rasmus, Desmond and Edwin Jackson FOR Jeter and Tim Hudson

    B. Rasmus for Liriano

    Desmond is my starting SS and sucks, particularly in OPS. My offense has been very good though, so my primary aim is to upgrade at SP. I also have good alternatives to Rasmus in the OF (Boesch, K. Johnson, Freese, Daniel Murphy – 3 are benched right now, so they could all absorb the starts on a matchup basis at OF and Util). Do I try to kill 2 birds with one stone in offer A, or keep it simple and go straight up for SP in offer B?

  47. bogbert says:

    Grey, sit or start – (10-team roto, down in K and WHIP)

    Stauffer @SF
    Carrasco vs. NYY

    Also, drop either for Bills, Morrow, or Liriano?


  48. Joel says:


    right now, in a 6×6 h2h league, I can trade Fielder for Pujols straight up. should I do it?

  49. Brew Crew says:

    Which Side: Utley/Smoak or Bruce??

  50. C.O.C. says:

    Just aquired Kung Fu Panda in a trade, and picked up Furcal to replace the SS I traded. Sandoval seems to be heating up finally after the hand(wrist?) injury, What do you see out of Sandoval and Furcal ROS?

  51. larry says:

    Start Cahill vs. Sea?

    Also Freese, Valencia or Chisenhall?


  52. larry says:

    Forgot to add start Baker vs. TB?

    Thx again for your time.

  53. L-Boogie says:

    Bruce or Werth?

    Thanks dude.

  54. Nick says:

    I was offered Greinke for Lind in a 12 team roto league where I could use some more pitching. Who would you want ROS?

  55. Team Bring It says:

    @Grey, how would you rank the following as keepers for the next 3 years.

    Pence, Heyward, Trout, Harper

  56. herschel says:

    @Grey: roto league, chisenhall or thames?

  57. L-Boogie says:

    Werth/Alexei Ramirez or Bruce/Bonifacio? 5×5.

    Thanks dude.

  58. jack says:

    Nyjer Morgan: he’s hitting well but not running like he has in the past. Think he picks it up on the basepaths? Hoping he can fill Ichiro’s spot for me in the future as I have salary cap constraints and Ichiro is expensive. Am I deluded?

  59. Doog says:

    Dynasty points league — Moustakas and Aroldis Chapman for Cano? The value seems great, but I have Kipnis coming up soon — trade or hold?

  60. dingbat says:

    Any thoughts on whether Strasburg makes it back to MLB this year? I just picked him up to put into a spare DL slot, and the latest updates make it sound like he could start a minor league rehab assignment soon, making a few September starts a distinct possibility.

  61. Sos says:

    Pick one to drop? Bernadina, trumbo, or hafner?

  62. Howard says:

    @Grey I’ve got a decision to make with Albert coming back on who to drop: Presley, Moreland, Domonic, Jennings or Morse?

  63. Oz.J. says:

    Any reason Robertson of the Yanks would be worth picking up as a better option for saves in the short term than Melancon?

  64. ichirosan says:

    Got offered Greinke for Valverde? Take the money and run?

  65. Wilsonian says:

    MMD in the lineup and playing 3rd with Wiggy in left.

  66. BucLover says:

    Grey, In my RCL, my pitching staff is: Matt Cain, Daniel Hudson, Ian Kennedy, Jair Jurrjens, Phillip Humber, Cory Luebke, Phil Hughes (DL), and John Axford, Kyle Farnsworth, Sergio Santos, Frank Francisco. I’d rather have someone to play in Tulo’s spot while he’s out, but to do that, I’ll need to get rid of a pitcher. Do you see one I could do without, or should I sit tight for a day or two and see if Tulo’s return is eminent? I’ve got Michael Morse and Jose Tabata not playing so my wiggle room is non-existant.
    Thanks Grey.

  67. Oilcan Giuseppe says:

    Grey:could you rank these three?….Wells,C. Pena, el Caballo.


    10 team h2h 8×8(TB’s,OBP,XBH)

  68. BucLover says:

    BTW, I’ll probably be picking up Betancourt or M. Tejada to fill in for Tulo.

  69. pipa says:

    What you think about Reynolds for Carpenter. I have Gordon to put at 3rd if I trade Reynolds away.

  70. Brew Crew says:

    Pick one for UTIL:

    Moose, Hosmer @ CWS (Peavy), or Snider @ BOS (Lester)


  71. Eddie says:

    Pujols is off the DL….
    Rick James thinks that Winstrol is a hell of a drug.

  72. Oilcan Giuseppe says:

    anyone heard about Braun’s status for tonight?

  73. Steve says:

    Oh yeah – and big ups to Doc for a great round-up. Going over the middle for Razzball since, you know, whenever.

  74. AL KOHOLIC says:

    finnaly gave up on jemmings with current DTD guys morse and cargo,picked up byrd and maybin

  75. AL KOHOLIC says:

    jennings that is

  76. Voidoid says:

    Hey Grey- is there a razzball term for when one of your pitchers hits a grand slam off one of your other pitchers? (besides ZOINKS!)

  77. Oilcan Giuseppe says:

    screw you Grandy man….he’s been kicking my ass in multiple leagues all yr and Im sick of it.

  78. Steve says:

    And now I’m glad I sat Carrasco. And Wandy.

  79. black love says:

    is Mauer/Liriano for McCutchen fair?

  80. Steve says:

    Lester out of the game. No idea why as yet.

  81. pipa says:

    who is ROS?

  82. bogbert says:

    This seems like a no-brainer, but maybe I’m missing something, thus the post.

    Was just offered Garza for Vogelsong. Take Garza and run?

  83. pipa says:


  84. Oilcan Giuseppe says:

    is Todd Coffee the fattest player other than Fielder?

  85. Steve says:

    Wolfman getting jacked.

    Ah, that one never gets old. Not for me at least.

  86. Steve says:

    Jeez, I came *this* close to grabbing Karstens for a spot start in the RCL.

  87. Oilcan Giuseppe says:

    wow….Roenike just let Wolf hit after giving up seven runs.I guess he figures there’s more damage to be done to my ERA.thanks Ron roenike.thanks a lot.

  88. Steve says:

    Lester strained his lat, apparently.

  89. fyodor says:


    At this point would you want Chacin, Beachy, or Garza?


  90. Mr. Neutron says:


    Please pick two:

    Fister @Ana
    Dickey @SF
    F. Garcia vs. TB
    Buehrle vs. Minn
    Capuano @SF

  91. Steve says:

    Come on Papelbon, you fool. Finish it.

  92. Wilsonian says:

    Is that a Dan Struggla sighting? 2 hits in one game?!?! No friggin’ way!?!

  93. Wilsonian says:

    Also, Ass-Dribble left with an ankle sprain and Baker left with right elbow shizz…

  94. quimmy says:


    keeper league:

    i just got offered:

    his: pence, n.cruz and srod
    my: cargo, snider and jzimm


  95. Oilcan Giuseppe says:

    the injury situation is ridiculous right now:Reyes,Youk,Tulo,CarGo,Baker,Lester,Gordon,Morse, Madson,Braun,Zambrano,Putz,Victorino,VMart,Danks,Rivera….all within the past week or so.

  96. herschel says:

    @Grey: assuming he gets called up relatively soon, kipnis vs chisenhall?

  97. Steve says:

    Anyone know anything about this Louis Coleman fella who’s been doing work for the Royals of late?

  98. chata says:

    @ Grey and aspiring analcysts :

    why/how isn’t Peavy the same pitcher that he used to be ?

    does he have a chance of recovering his old form , or is this some sort
    of post-operative adjustment to his approach ?

    thanking you , in advance .

  99. quimmy says:

    @grey: accepted. its year one of a 15 team keeper league. we start 4 OF, my 4 now are Kemp, JUP, Pence and Cruz. i it weird of i go to sleep with a chubby tonight?

  100. Steve says:

    And somewhere Murray Chass yells out from the sofa to his wife who is doing the dishes – “I told you that Hernandez fella hadn’t done enough to help his team win.”

  101. GTG says:

    FU Brandon League. They should make you the starter and let Felix blow your effing wins.
    Good night.

  102. Fletch says:

    For fuck sake…I lose a Felix win in the 9th only to exchange it for a Bailey loss in the 10th. I can’t win.

  103. Feeding the Abscess

    Feeding the Abscess says:

    Hot damn, League blew Felix’s win, Bell’s hard at work blowing Stauffer’s win. I think it’s time for scorers to take a stand and stop awarding wins to relievers who blow saves.

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