I liked Carlos Quentin going into spring of ’07. Whoa! You got the wrong year there, buddy? No, no I didn’t. I drafted Quentin in lots of leagues in ’07 because of his .940 OPS in the minors. He looked like the real deal. Had pizz-ower, spizz-eed and a good iz-eye. (If Jay-Z plays fantasy baseball, he’s so going to be searching Google for some pizz-ower and spizz-eed.) With a spot in Arizona’s outfield locked up, this guy, Quentin, was going to be a superstar. Then ’07 happened and Quentin was eating from a container of I Can’t Believe It’s Not Better. Then, this season, he finally started to live up to his promise… Wait, what is this? Carlos Quentin, This Is Your Life? You know the deal, he hit well this year. But now he has a fractured wrist. As long as he doesn’t have a setback in the post-season or off-season, I’m liking Quentin. This year was not a fluke. Anyway, here’s some more fantasy baseball keepers for ’09:

Alexei Ramirez – Nothing for nothing, but he wasn’t supposed to be good. He’s about to be a Latin 27, but I’ve often remarked (I’m a remarker, ya’ll!) that he looks a bit like Alfonso Soriano. Just be careful about who you keep Alexei Ramirez over. Remember Angel Berroa won a Rookie of the Year with eerily similar numbers. (BTW, why can’t anything ever be eerily different?  Olbermann and O’Reilly are eerily different, right?)

Kevin Slowey – I try to stay away from keeping pitchers. In certain leagues or certain keeper teams, it’s unavoidable. Then there’s pitchers I actually want to keep; Kevin Slowey is one. This is the 2nd year in a row that Slowey’s trending in the right direction. Not only are his HRs coming down (literally — oofa!) but his Ks are going up. He used to be compared favorably to Radke, he may just pass those expectations. I will tout him more this winter, possibly building a Slowey shrine (from the scraps of my knocked-down Alex Gordon shrine).

Steven Pearce – On Tuesday, Pearce finally flashed some power for the Pirates that he’s shown plenty of in the minors. To burrow an Austrailian phrase, he can wombat with the best of them. (Yes, I meant to write burrow. It’s a pun, people!)

  1. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Shogun: Why doesn’t someone ask that question? You just did. I think others ask that question. Is that a question that needs asking more of? Season 2 was the most off the beaten path and my least favorite. That season seemed like they didn’t know what to do, “Should we continue with McNulty? Should we just highlight Baltimore?” Then after that season, I think they came together and said, “Hey, we had a good thing at first, let’s go back to it.”

    EDIT: Needed an eff.

  2. Shogun says:

    @Grey: Good points. After watching the first few episodes, I thought Season Two would be a disaster for the reasons you mentioned. But I ended up liking it a lot. The stevedore crew had some interesting personalities and the organized crime angle was cool.

  3. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Shogun: When I say it was the worst season, I’m also saying it was still better than 99% of what is on TV. It just felt like if The Wire were a novel or a movie, that part could have been excorsized and no one would’ve missed it.

  4. Shogun says:

    @Grey: Mos’ def!

  5. Baron Von Vulturewins says:

    @Grey: “I Still Can’t Believe It’s Not Better”?

    Damn — it’s mid-September and he’s still at the top of his game. That’s good shizz. If you were a Cheech & Chong movie, you’d be “Still Smoking.”

    Season Two of The Wire was awesome and underrated. The one season that got into blue-collar decay and gentrification in interesting, complex ways. Plus: The Greek!

  6. Baron Von Vulturewins says:

    @Baron Von Vulturewins: Not sure where the “Still” came from. Was it in the commercial? In any case, it’s apparently in my brain.

  7. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Baron Von Vulturewins: Maybe your copy and paste adds words? That would be a fun feature for the kids. “Yo, I programed my copy and paste to add a comma and a ‘cuz’ at the end of all of my lines.”

    I liked Season 2, it’s just my least favorite, cuz.

  8. royce! says:

    @Grey: Perhaps once Shogun has finished Season Four we can debate the merits, but right now I don’t think it’d be possible without ruining it for him. Like you said, though, all of The Wire is better than 99% of other TV.

    Now I gotta figure out what TV show to Netflix next. Any opinions on Deadwood?

  9. Shogun says:

    @[email protected]@Grey: Yeah, I’d love to debate best seasons, best characters, all that jazz, after I finish it up. It shouldn’t be too long. It would make for good off-season conversation, when the headline baseball news is that Joba Chamberlain farted and his ass feels a little sore, but he is day-to-day for winterball. Wait, that kind of reporting has been headline baseball news all season!

  10. Grey

    Grey says:

    @royce!: I watch all MTV reality shows, all Bravo reality shows, Survivor, ANTM, a bunch of VH-1 reality shows and Entourage. Some other shows I might be skipping, but what I’m getting at is I don’t watch much scripted TV, and never saw Deadwood. I’ve been thinking about grabbing Mad Men cause my friends keep talking about it, but I haven’t yet. Also, haven’t watched a sitcom since Arrested Development/Extras/Curb/The Office (British).

  11. Season 1 and 4 of the Wire were my faves and 2 and 5 were my least favorite.

    But still loved every season….

    BTW, can you believe they never paid off that throwaway scene in Season 3 when they show Rawls at the gay bar?

  12. Shogun says:

    @Grey: Do yourself a favor and watch Mad Men. It’s one of the better series I’ve ever seen. Also check out It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia. There’s some pretty funny, irreverent stuff there. I started Deadwood but never got into it.

  13. Shogun says:

    Venture Bros. is pretty funny too if that kind of show is your thing. I kind of dug the first season of Dexter, too, but that’s less of a shoe-in as a likable show.

  14. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Shogun: Actually, I’ve caught some of IASiP and liked it. Just never felt the need to see every one, ya know?

    @Rudy Gamble: Rawls loves men like you love Juan Pierre. Apparently.

    What was up with them not paying that off? I mean, it’s one thing to have a throwaway line or scene to layer a character, but that was a little too much to just ignore.

    EDIT: Every one is two words.

  15. Baron Von Vulturewins says:

    @Shogun: I’ll be especially interested to find out what you thought of the giant atomic explosion that wipes out Baltimore in the end.

    Oh wait, that was Sum of All Fears.

    @Rudy Gamble: Word.

    @all: Deadwood is excellent. I guarantee you’ll like it. It’s much better than, say, Dexter (which I like) — Ian McShane tears it up. (That sentence would read a lot differently if it said “Ian McShane tears up.” Whole other show.)

    I guess this is what happens in the season’s waning days… people start plotting how to fill the hole for 6 months.

    Speaking of which: Fantasy Football is to Fantasy Baseball as checkers is to chess. Discuss.

  16. Your analogy is close…Rawls likes men for cheap feels…I like Pierre for cheap steals….

    I like how Wire alumni just spring up on random TV shows like Michael on the new 90210. I saw Daniels on the trailor of some new show.

    How has one of the 11 CSIs now picked up Smooth Lester Freeman?

  17. Shogun says:

    @BVV: Haha. Some of the police probably thought that nuking B’more would be the only way to solve its problems.

  18. SoS says:

    I need one of these losers for a spot start. Need a win. [email protected] LAA, Greg Smith vs. Tex, Francis vs. LAD. It’s alright. I know punt is the answer, but humor me.

  19. Grey

    Grey says:

    @SoS: Francis or Smith, I don’t mind either. I’d probably lean towards Smith because of how hot Dodgers have been.

    EDIT: Dodgers have been hot. My bad.

  20. wassup says:

    Whos the best spot starter for tommorow that wont kill my ratios and will get the win. Scott Baker against the Orioles(Cabrera had a 7.71 august era), gil meche (facing cliff lee),matt harrison against the a’s, or olsen against the nats. Im leaning towards harrison because he is 7-3 and the a’s have the worst team ops against lefties (.643 ops) but im not sure. Your ideas on who the best is or can u narrow it down to the top 2. thanks in advance.

  21. knighttown says:


    re: your edit.

    “Everyone” is just fine.

  22. Grey

    Grey says:

    @wassup: I like Baker and Meche, in that order.

  23. Grey

    Grey says:

    @knighttown: BTW, did you see your entry made it into the glossary?

  24. knighttown says:


    Ah. I wasn’t paying close attention to the context as you were discussing TV shows I don’t watch. I thought you were saying everyone was not a word. Now I understand, and actually, I didn’t know that. Probably the best information you’ve given me since the time you told me that my Polanco/O-Dog blah-toon I had at 2B wasn’t the shizz I thought it was.

    And Hell yeah, I noticed I made the glossary. I’ve been telling everyone I see, and the response has been “eerily similar”. It goes like this:

    “What the fuck is razzball and what kind of loser spends time randomly typing words that rhyme with or have beer as part of them into Google, combined with baseball, in hopes of finding soemthing that could morph into “beerer goggles”.

    vandermeer goggles
    speer goggles (floyd)
    deer goggles (rob)
    beers goggles (clarence)

    The answer? This kind of loser, bitch. And then I stab them in the eye because they all look like Karabell.

  25. Grey

    Grey says:

    @knighttown: Wow. That’s a automatic nominee for Comment ‘O Week.

  26. BigFatHippo says:

    @Grey: I’m looking for a reason to sit Webb tomorrow against Cincinnatti but can’t come up with one. He’s gotta get his 20th sometime doesn’t he?

  27. knighttown says:

    On an unrelated topic, I’m not pleased with what I’m getting from Aviles (MI) lately and I’m not sure he’s healthy b/c he’s been pretty steady all year. No Kelly Johnson available and Wigginton seems to have taken a turn for the worse. Or a “tern for the worse”, as my father says every time he sees a fucking tern, which is a river bird fairly common up here.

    So, looking for avg=runs=rbi only (others don’t matter) who do I like out of:
    F. Lopez

  28. Shogun says:

    @knighttown: Props on that comment. And did you coin “blah-toon” too? Whoever did is a genius.

    That’s a craptacular list of options. I’d probably keep Aviles and hope he breaks out of his slump – I have him on two teams, so I feel your pain – but if you’re determined to drop him I’d pick up Asdrubal or Lopez.

  29. Grey

    Grey says:

    @BigFatHippo: You can’t sit Webb, no matter how tempting.

    @knighttown: Asdrubal, DeWitt, Velez, punt.

    This is obviously advice that could change in two days. But at this point in the season, you should be ready to stream MIs.

    @Shogun: Um, blahtoon is mine. Thank you.

  30. BigFatHippo says:

    @Grey: Just looking for a reason, I have Bills and Hamels going too. Lots of innings but could be very tasty results.

    Wish you could see the RCL standings, only 8 pts seperate the top 5 teams right now.

  31. Grey

    Grey says:

    @BigFatHippo: re: RCL — Wow, it’s that bunched up now?

  32. Big Mike says:

    God bless those in Ike’s path, but my Berkman, Soriano, Soto, Zambrano, and Marmol stats for Fri/Sat are also in jeopardy of being blown away. I’m in a 5X5 H2H league and this is the 2nd week of the playoffs. My opponents’ team is unaffected by Ike (no Cubs, no Astros). If I lose the matchup this week, my season is over. Would you pick any of these or would you simply ride out the storm? Hitters: B.Wood, C.Ross, Kendall, Lind, SniderPitchers: Marquis, M.Harrison, D.Purcey, McCarthy Thanks … again!

  33. BigFatHippo says:

    @Grey: Yeah, in real time (aka Stattracker) it’s 7 but we all know how quickly that can change. And no, the Fightin Hippos is not one of them.

    As of yesterday…

    No Glove, blah blah blah-126.5
    JOB squad-125.5
    and my darkhorse candidate Sandlots Finest (the Kid) 125

  34. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Big Mike: You have to fill in for as many guys as you can. I’d drop Big Z and Marmol. Not sure what categories you’re most in need for, but I’d lean towards Wood and Ross, with all things being equal, if you need offense. If you need pitching, then Marquis, McCarthy then Purcey, in that order. I’d hold Soriano and Berkman, just in case you get through this.

  35. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Big Mike: Oh, and Soto would be a drop if you need pitching. I wouldn’t worry about him either.

    @BigFatHippo: Thanks for that update. I can’t believe how close it is this late. Very cool.

  36. BigFatHippo says:

    @Grey: “I can’t believe I’m not better” and that’s me quoting you, poorly but somewhat close.

    Actually it’s unreal, NoGlove obviously quit as he’s -216 IP but didn’t get killed by injuries. JOB Squad is -93 so I’m not sure he’s playing either.

    It should come down to p0rk, Cruisin and Chase.

    I don’t know who to root for>

    The silent, mysterious chick, (who may or may not be a hottie, but certainly FBB is a point in her favor)

    The kid, (who should be studying for his first exam or cheerleaders panties, not necessarily in that order) or

    The Other White Meat (who could boot me from the league if I say I’m rooting against him)

  37. BigFatHippo says:

    @Grey: Not to change the subject, ok, to change the subject.

    Have you heard anything about the new Spike Lee Joint, “Miracle at St Anna?”

    He hasn’t done anything in a while but I always liked his flicks. This one looks totally different, may be great.

  38. Grey

    Grey says:

    @BigFatHippo: re: RCL — Wow, that is unreal.

    re: Spike — I’ve actually been a fan for a long time and only briefly jumped ship during the Bamboozled era. (C’mon, how can you not like a guy that feels the need to use a floating dolly in every single movie? BTW, look up floating dolly and you’ll know what I mean.) I also really liked his work-for-hire number with Inside Man. Felt like he got (some) game again. But this movie is getting bad buzz from what I heard. I hope the naysayers are wrong cause I want it to be good.

  39. Nick says:

    @BigFatHippo: You really like Slowey next start against Cleveland who he has given up 5 ER’s in each of his last 2 outings against them??

  40. BigFatHippo says:

    @Nick: Why you asking me? Grey’s got the boner for Slowey.

    I know you just clicked on the wrong crooked arrow but had to say it.

    Good point though.

  41. BSA says:

    @BigFatHippo: I don’t know why players have quit. I know it is depressing, “Helloooo? Lucky number 13 here!” Yet everyone was supposed to hate all those whiney bitches who quit in their leagues. I hate to say it but my first Roto experience and I would love to end the year somewhere in the top ten out of 16, but not because of leap frogging players who don’t play.
    I don’t know I am getting slammed at work for professional ethics right now so I figured I’d rant about FBB Ethics. If you can’t play then don’t start! Heck I still blame my third born for my slipping five spots and not recovering. I still roll my shitty team on and off the bench based on who is and isn’t starting. Damn I held onto CGuillen and have been sucking wind trying to find a SS who plays consistently.

    Nuff said! Good to see you back!

  42. BigFatHippo says:

    @Grey: If he can top Mo Better Blues, he’ll have something.

    Not sure about this one though, looks kinda too deep for a Knicks fan.

    re: Floating Dolly

    I felt like that when I watched “Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas.”

  43. BigFatHippo says:

    @BSA: What’s really depressing is the quitters are beating us. But I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, 1/2 season leagues are not a true judge of your prowess as a roto manager.

    Don’t give up on roto, took me 4 years to figure out how to play and I’m well on my way to a 5 bill payoff. Interestingly enough, the commish tried to change it to H 2 H this year but I vetoed and everybody followed suit. Think he saw my keepers and got scared.

  44. BSA says:

    @BigFatHippo: Something to be said for not making too many moves.
    Nah, I won’t give up on it because I am too stubborn. I am better at FBB this year than I was last year so if I can remember some of my moves next year I should start stronger. I laugh as I look back over my draft compared to the teams I have now.

  45. knighttown says:

    Anyone want to argue the fact that Roy Oswalt is making a serious run at the number 1 fantasy baseball pitcher next year. Since he’s got back from that hip thing he’s been flawless. Another 8 inning, 2 hit shutout tonight.

    Tuesday July 1st, I sent Hamels, Ellsbury and O. Hudson to generic Sox fan for Ryan Howard, Manny Parra and the throw-in, Roy Oswalt. TSN turning point right thur.

  46. wassup says:

    Who should I stream out of the Pirates-Cardinals game. Joel Pineiro (worse ratios but better team) or Maholm (better numbers but bad team). Can you base it solely on who has the better odds of the team. Who should I grab out of these 2 for the win?

  47. Steve says:

    (Waves fist at sky) Screw you, Scott Downs!

  48. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Steve: Could you throw in something for Cain?

  49. BigFatHippo says:

    @wassup: Pineiro hasn’t pitched since Sept 1, so not sure you can trust him. We’ll see what Grey says but it could be one of those 2 inning, 5 ER games.

    Much as I hate to say it, Cards tend to fade after meaningful series so Maholm may not be a bad start.

    @BSA: Are you in a keeper league? If so, you should be much better.

  50. BigFatHippo says:

    @Grey: That’s awesome, could be the start of a whole new FBB universe. Serious players only.

    You should get Vegas involved. Remember how lame poker used to be when it was played in your dads basement or somebody’s garage. I do.

    Now there’s this little thing called Texas Hold’em, you may have heard of it.

  51. Steve says:

    @Matt Cain: Grey told me to tell you – “Screw you”

    @Grey: That Wood fella is on fire. Great call on him.

Comments are closed.