Allow me to demonstrate my feelings on Aristides Aquino over the last 12 months:
“Meh, he’s got some swing and miss tendencies, but I guess you can pick him up if your league is deep enough.”
“Wow, Tuffy Rhodes ain’t got nothing on this guy.”
“Yes, absolutely pick him up!”
“Oh em gee, Aristides Aquino is the greatest GOAT of all-time. I will now call him The GGOATOAT!”
“I want The GGOATOAT to have my babies.”
“Will I have baby GOATs with The GGOATOAT or Baby GGOATOATs?”
“Hmm…The GGOATOAT is starting to swing and miss a lot again. That could be a little bit of a concern.”
The preceding was the tides of my thoughts in only two months of his playing time. Then, this offseason:
“The GGOATOAT is going to be way overpriced, but I still do like him.”
“Wow, he’s not overpriced at all, I wonder if he’s worth a sleeper post?”
“Wait a second, he still has a starting job, right? I mean, this Shogo Akiyama signing won’t kill that, right? Right?! Answer me, Internal Monologue!”
“They signed The Greek God of Hard Contact?” Extremely worried, “Um, can Nick Castellanos play shortstop?”
“Sorry, Cinderfellas and five Cinderellas, I’m dropping Aristides Aquino way down in my rankings since he will never play in that crowded outfield.”
“DID SOMEONE SAY UNIVERSAL DH?!” So, what can we expect from Aristides Aquino for 2020 fantasy baseball and what makes him a great dart throw?
I don’t want to el oh el all over the place, but the Reds still have Nick Senzel, Josh VanMeter and Phillip Ervin, who(ms) could all universally DH. Your mileage may vary on VanMeter and Ervin, but they’re there (stutterer!) and Senzel would seem to at least get some looks at DH when he’s not platooning with Winker and/or Akiyama, which is why Aristides Aquino is simply a dart throw and not a guy I’m moving back up 200 spots in my rankings. Aquino showed last year what he can do if he gets hot — hitting 19 HRs, .259 in 56 games. Give this guy 82 to 100 games, and he’s going to break Bonds’s single-season home run record. The power is real — he hit 47 homers in 134 games last year between Triple-A and the majors. The Ks could be a concern. Last year’s 26.7% in 56 MLB games doesn’t tell the full story. Once pitchers had licked their index finger and turned the first page of The Book On Aquino to learn his weaknesses, he had a 30.9% strikeout rate in September and hit .196. (I shuddered thinking about someone licking their fingers without a finger condom on, and how are they licking their fingers while wearing a mask? Hmm…?) Concerning too that Aquino was weakest on fastballs, because if baseball returns with pitchers not quite comfortable yet with their offspeed stuff, they might chuck up multiple fastballs. Usually they’d get hosed, but Aquino might be the one all wet there. Hard to say on that, and I can see the other side of it, with pitchers not trusting their fastballs yet, not being up to speed, so offspeed. But, and here’s one for the people writing off Aquino, why are we assuming he can’t readjust to MLB pitching? Isn’t it the usual career track for players to start hot, lose their shizz when pitchers figure them out, then for the hitter to readjust back and do damage? No idea why the prevailing attitude is Aquino can’t readjust back. For Aquino’s current price, which is essentially free, I’m squinting one eye, placing my weak hand behind my back and throwing a dart with my other hand.