by: Grey
Two weeks ago, Albert Pujols fractured his wrist. He said he was going to be out for 6 weeks but he wasn’t sure until he went back to his home planet Krypton, where he’s known as Al-El. On Krypton, Al-El had a heart-to-heart with a hologram image of Stan Musial. What Stan told Al-El was […]
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Master Standings are here. The tight battle continues at the top of the standings, with 6 teams totaling 105 or more points. The Pesky Pole Dancers (Trippin’ Baseballs) held on to first place, gaining 3 points to 112. The Dancers made 2 moves, replacing Jose Tabata and Ike Davis with Jason Kubel and Cory Luebke. […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?So Grey lost his stache in a tragic sparkler related accident, but did manage to partially recover the remnants and is having them reattached as we speak, so I’m going to fill in for him on this sacred of holidays, July 5th. If you have ever seen or heard of the NFL or smelled a […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Yesterday was Juan Rivera’s birthday. *giggles like a schoolgirl* Wait, I wanna think about how the Blue Jays cut Juan Rivera on his birthday. *giggles again* It was his birthday! Man, that is rich. The Blue Jays should’ve had someone tell Juan a passage from Ezekiel 25:17. Not someone important just to rub it in […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?I’ve ignored the Padres number 11 ranked prospect long enough, Jedd Gyorko (3B). Do keep in mind he’s playing in the California League (High-A), yet his numbers are still impressive. In 332 at-bats, he is slashing .367/.433/.642 with 53 XBH (18 Hr, 35 2B), 11 steals and a 60:38 K:BB ratio. His swing is a […]
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by: Smokey
Holy hell, it’s July already, cue the fireworks. Roll the stock footage of Bill Pullman from Independence Day, except make it sound cool with a nice fantasy touch, “This week we celebrate our wins above replacement day!” This week’s list is littered with crafty lefties and dudes who wear pseudo-athletic glasses, which are also cool […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Jack McKeon’s got a word for players like Hanley Ramirez — lollygaggers. For 5 years, Hanley’s been riding the crest of natural ability. As I’ve said before about Hanley and Manny, insouciance doesn’t age well. Think about the hot girl who got all the guys in high school then lost her looks ten years later. […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Replacing Phil Coke in the Tigers rotation is Charlie Furbush. It’s about time that Leyland gave Furbush a mustache ride. Furbush also sounds like a character description for someone in a Woodstock documentary. Or a character name in a 70’s porn flick made by Leyland called, “The Marlboro Mandingo.” That was co-starring Virginia Slim. Furbush […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Ryan Madson hit the DL and some Bastardo took over, Broxton is a bastardo and Guerra is getting saves since Kuo can’t watch Lifetime without crying — assuming there are Dodger saves, Rauch was named the closer and Frank2 started getting all the saves, Lyon is out for the season and Melancon looks terrible, La […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Erik Bedard is headed to the DL. The Bedarded they come, the Bedarded they fall. So, he has a sprained knee. “Ow, I think I hurt myself getting onto the examination table to have you check my shoulder.” That’s Bedard at the doctor’s office. Right now, the Erich Bedardens are showing the Bennis Carpensheeters a […]
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by: Stephen
Jake Odorizzi | RHP (SP) | Kansas City Royals | D.o.B: 3/27/1990 | 6’2″ | 185 lbs | B/T: R/R | 1st rd, 2008 | MIL #1 prospect per Baseball America, 2011 | MiLB Player Page The centerpiece to the Royals trading Zack Greinke to the Brewers; Odorizzi coincidentally has been compared to Greinke himself, […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Ryan Madson went to the DL with numbness in his pitching hand. Hello, bullpen? Is there anybody in there? Just nod if you can hear me. Brad Lidge is due back in a few weeks. AHHHHH! Now you feel a little sick. Antonio Bastardo would be the immediate add for vulture saves. That’ll keep you […]
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