This week we’re starting a new weekly column that will be here every Thursday afternoon, it will be all about 2012 fantasy baseball keepers. The column will then move to Friday in the offseason.  Since many fantasy baseball keeper leagues don’t decide on their keepers until the start of the new season, I figured I’d go over some fantasy baseball keepers from now until next spring.  These aren’t guys that are obviously keepers.  You won’t find Braun or Pujols here.  These are guys that you might’ve been able to grab in deep leagues and hold onto for next year on the cheap.  Who doesn’t love a bargain?!  My dead grandmother loved a bargain.  Her death and bargains were in no way related.  Filene’s Basement was completely acquitted in that case.  Though me and Grandpa we believe.  We believe…

Mike Stanton is gonna be a Hall of Famer in 25 years.  Me, you and the Mayans may not be around to see it, but if a tree falls in the forest does it not make a sound?  It does when Stanton bumps into said tree, picks it up and uses it as a toothpick.  I was too distracted by drugs, girls and hormones to fully appreciate Frank Thomas coming onto the scene back in 1991.  But let’s say I wasn’t, let’s also say I had a webblog back then when they didn’t exist and, finally, let’s say my web admin was Al Gore.  I would’ve wrote this, “Instead of Herman, you’re inside Frank Thomas’s head, here’s what you’d see.  A cobbler with crooked fingernails and stumpy legs writing on a chalkboard the equation for the perfect swing.  You’d also see hitting coach Charley Lau bitching out Yeardley Smith for her outright refusal in letting Frank Thomas eat a whole cow.  Finally, you’d see this Hank Azaria guy who might have a big future if I could just hear him and not see him.”  And that’s me fabricating me!  Stanton’s Frank Thomas without the stupid walks (no offense to real baseball) and it’s not like he can’t take a walk, but what he does is mollywhop with his pony sticks.  He could hit 40 homers with ten steals as early as next year.  The average may stay in the .260 to .280 range, but whatever.  Next year, he’ll only be 22 years old.  For keepers, that’s a slam dunk.  Whether it’s 2012 fantasy baseball, 2013 fantasy baseball or 1991 fantasy baseball.

  1. chata says:

    the basement could get brutal , at times .
    hope your gramps is ok .
    call him .

  2. VinWins

    VinWins says:

    C’mon, Grey, there’s no such thing as Santa.

  3. chata says:


    looking forward to this column .
    hopefully it will help me get it through my thick skull not to
    keep guys like tommy hanson .

    this afternoon’s agenda :
    a) root for the brew crew
    b) learn my e-mail address

  4. Grey

    Grey says:

    @chata: He went out on a date with a girl 30 years his junior and he popped 150 milligrams of Viagra, so I think he’s doing fine.

    @VinWins: Hehe

    @chata: Hanson will be fine next year. Nice on B.

  5. Commish Cauda says:

    16-team, H2H-Points Keeper League

    We can keep two minors players for free in 2012 as long as they are still in the minors Aug. 31st.

    Typically, you want to keep near-MLB guys who can contribute in 2012, or big name prospects to use as trade bait.

    Pick two from the following:

    Devin Mesoraco
    Jerry Sands
    Travis Snider
    Will Myers



  6. Tommy the D says:

    ROS – Freese or McGehee?

  7. Boomer19 says:

    I have Votto, A-gon, Tulo, Braun and J-up for next year. 14 team mixed roto. Keep six. Should I target a pitcher to keep or maybe a top third baseman? Who do you rank for top 5 pitchers? Halladay, Kershaw, Strasburg, Felix, Lee?

  8. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Boomer19: Halladay, F-Her, Kershaw… Strasburg is not a top 5 pitcher. Go for a pitcher.

  9. Boomer19 says:

    What tier of pitcher should I target for Ryan Zimmerman and Bourn?

  10. jared says:

    who do you like better for tomorrow?
    W. rodriquez vs giants
    matt harrison @ white sox

  11. MattTruss

    MattTruss223 says:

    Youk to the DL – Lavarnway called up and in the lineup tonight – FYI

  12. rvde says:

    Stick with K Johnson at 2B or move to EY, Jr?

  13. Grey

    Grey says:

    @rvde: Young

  14. Jeff says:

    With Youk on the 15 day DL, I’m looking to trade him for a 3B that is playing. He’s a 9th round keeper in a 16 team league so has quite a bit of value. Who are the top 3B in your view for the rest of the year and what would be the lowest value you would take in return (i.e. the 10th best 3rd baseman for the rest of the year)? Not much out there on the WW.

  15. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Jeff: Bautista, Wright, Longoria etc. Maybe for Aramis, Young or Sandoval…

  16. tripleds says:

    Think Maybin might rate as a sneaky keeper? How about Trumbo?

  17. Chris says:

    Get big, Kershaw! Get big!

    The Brew Crew sure aren’t scoring much in the way of runs for having won something like 20 of their last 23. 3 runs or fewer in their last 6 games…

  18. Steve says:

    If my daughters were older, I’d be happy for one of them to marry Clayton Kershaw.

  19. Eng says:

    Furcal or Giavotella ros?

  20. Grey

    Grey says:

    @tripleds: Sure on both, depends on leagues.

    @Chris: True

    @Steve: I plan on adopting a daughter just to have him marry her.

    @Eng: Giavotella

  21. Steve says:

    @Grey: Imagine being able to call up your son-in-law and point out what he needs to do to help your fantasy team.

    As much as I moan about my hitting in the RCL, my pitching is pretty much the polar opposite. For example, had Cueto, Morrow and Kershaw goingt the last day or so (Morrow and Cueto claimed off waivers).

    Saw some video of Morrow last night. He was just repeatedly throwing it at 97-98 straight past guys.

  22. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Steve: Imagine if it wasn’t always a good convo, “Hey, Russell Martin, love what you’re doing with the house with my daughter, but I really need Jesus Montero to get called up. Think you can pull a hammy?” Morrow was dazzling in his last start, Cueto’s charmed, and Kershaw is always dazzling.

  23. Steve says:

    @Grey: Or “my opponent’s just ahead of me in average and you’re on his team. Go 0/5 and I’ll babysit the kids for a week.”

  24. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Steve: “Is your dad mad at me?” “You walked someone in a 5-0 game and he lost WHIP. He doesn’t know why you don’t trust your fielders.” “Because you slept with half of them!”

  25. Steve says:

    @Grey: You nailed it right there. I’m not sure I can think of a baseballer I’d want within a million miles of my daughter.

  26. Oilcan Giuseppe says:

    @Steve: my h2h opponent started Cueto and Morrow last night.I was angry…..then I realized he is apparently not so bright because he also started Nolasco @Coors.

  27. Oilcan Giuseppe says:

    Grey:start Vanimal tonight @home vs AZ?

    also,Guerra or Parnell?….12 team 5×5

  28. Steve says:

    Joe Mauer is playing right field tonight according to Rob Neyer. Kubel has some family business (not the HBO show kind) and the backup cupboard is bare.

  29. Wilsonian says:

    @Grey: @Steve: unfortunately for your future daughters/adopted daughters, he’s already married (I checked for my step-daughter).

    I honestly only know this because a pretty incredible video of his choreographed dance with his wife was on YouTube. However, it was removed. Which is complete BS. Otherwise I’d share it with you now.

  30. SwaggerJackers says:

    Youk went down. GREAT. Which of these bums should I pick up?

    Moose, Chipper, Nunez, Turner, Scott Sizemore, Jose Lopez, Ian Stewart

  31. Steve says:

    @Wilsonian: @Grey: Oh man, a 23-year-old stud MLB pitcher is married? Dude should be out there cutting a swathe.

  32. Wilsonian says:

    @Steve: you never know, it was from earlier this year. He’s famous, good chance he’s divorced by now…

  33. Oilcan Giuseppe says:

    Grey:I have to replace Youkilis at 1B.Should I….

    use Napoli at 1B and grab Arencibia for catcher OR….

    p/u Hosmer/Goldschmidt/Moreland?

    12 team 5×5


  34. Random Collmenter says:

    This saturday some other baseball-obsessed pals and I are driving down to Petco from LA for the sole purpose of seeing Stanton take BP then hopefully hit 17 home runs. I’ll report back after watching to let you all know just how beautiful it was.

    Marlins v. Padres! Yeah!

  35. AL KOHOLIC says:

    @Random Collmenter: cool,hope he hits a top row broken bat shot

  36. Steve says:

    Ugh, Kennedy.

  37. Steve says:

    @Steve: Double play, please.

  38. royce! says:

    @Steve: Turns out Hughes, who was supposed to play RF, showed up to the wrong airport gate.

  39. royce! says:

    @Random Collmenter: Should stick around until Sunday- they’re retiring Hoffman’s number before the game. I think they figured they had to do it while he was still the all times saves leader.

  40. Steve says:

    @royce!: Confirms what I said in comment #27.

  41. Steve says:

    Kipnis out of the lineup again, despite being listed to start. Booo!

  42. royce! says:

    @Steve: Ha! That’s perfect.

  43. Steve says:

    @Grey: How do you like LeBlanc at home to the Marlins tomorrow? It’d be in H2H…

  44. Oilcan Giuseppe says:

    this PHI/AZ rain delay is killing me….”Vanimal” looked really good so far.chances are he either wont come back out,or else wont be as sharp.

  45. Steve says:

    @Oilcan Giuseppe: Kennedy owners are hoping for a rainstorm of biblical proportions.

  46. Steve says:

    I can’t imagine too many more unlikely home runs than Morneau off Sabathia.

    Just as well Howard is out, otherwise Neau-mor wouldn’t even have been in my lineup :-)

  47. Steve says:

    @Steve: Overturned. Booo!

  48. Wilsonian says:

    Damn, SF’s offense is PATHETIC. Timmy should not lose this game (I have him in a losses league).

  49. Steve says:

    Come on Pestano, you shithead.

  50. Steve says:

    Bet I won’t be drafting Ricky Ro’ in the 21st round next year.

  51. ruah says:

    In what order would you add this speed: Constanza, Tabata, Revere, Gwynn. Thanks

  52. Steve in NYC says:

    Umm… I don’t know if there’s a deeper NL only league out there. It’s a $280 cap auction league, for 25 players on 11 teams. (Usually 12, but we decided on leaving out the Pirates this year. May be the Mets or Astros next year).

    We can keep a player for 3 years, but after the 2nd, we can sign him to a “long term contract”. This means an extra $5 for each year.

    Stanton was picked up, and the owner will probably give him a long term deal. Heck, Jeremy Affeldt was given a long term deal last year!

    Which day doesn’t have too many readers? Tuesday? Sunday? Could you devote one day to a very deep NL (or AL) column for this? For example, is Nathan Eovaldi a keeper? What about Jordan Schafer? On another team, Strasburg is in his option year, so his owner will either have to give him a long term deal or have to dump him after this year? In that situation, would you sign him to a long term deal? 2 or 3 years?

    Thanks! :-)

  53. Max says:

    “These aren’t guys that are obviously keepers. You won’t find Braun or Pujols here. These are guys that you might’ve been able to grab in deep leagues and hold onto for next year on the cheap. Who doesn’t love a bargain?!”

    C’mon, Stanton is an obvious choice. For new keeper leagues in 2012, he should be a 3rd round pick or so. So, I’d keep him in 3 players keeper league and would think it even in 2 keeper leagues.

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