by: Grey
When Jim Edmonds was a trending topic on Twitter, I figured he died. Turns out he was just taking the Casino Bus to Cincy, though that might be a riverboat. Edmonds will continue to be a part-timer, gaining no value. Maybe one day he’ll garner 25% of a HOF vote and the interwebs will go […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?This week we’re starting a new weekly column that will be here every Monday afternoon, it will be all about fantasy baseball keepers. The column will then move to Friday in the offseason. Since many fantasy baseball keeper leagues don’t decide on their keepers until the start of the new season, I figured I’d go […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Brandon Morrow lost the no-hitter but pitched as well as any pitcher this year. 9 IP, 0 ER, 1 Hit, 2 Walks and 17 Ks. Though not everyone was impressed. When reached for comment after the game, Adam Lind said, “If you gave me 27 outs, I could strike out 17 times.” Did Morrow go […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?The Cuban legend goes that Aroldis Chapman once threw a fastball so hard that it caused Fidel Castro to say, “I haven’t seen something so beautiful since a young Charo.” Knowing that Fidel is a huge Charo fan, that’s not mild praise. (Fidel co-wrote Charo’s unauthorized biography, “My Cuchi-Cuchi” with Kitty Kelly.) The problem with […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?J.P. Arencibia was called up by the Buckless Jays. In Triple-A, Arencibia hit 31 homers in 379 ABs. That’s-a one spicy prospect! To go all Latin America on you, there’s a caveat. That was in the PCL, which is like playing on the moon with an aluminum bat. He’s not quite the prospect of Wieters, […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Thumb up the jam, thumb it up! While your feet are stompin’! Sorry, hard to stop that once I start. Kevin Youkilis was placed on the 15-day DL with his jammed thumb. Thumb up the jam, thumb it up! Youkilis was diagnosed with a tear of the muscle that helps contract the thumb. It’s a […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Now it’s time for everyone’s favorite game, Fantasy Baseball, Fun With Numbers. Ding, ding, ding… Bassoon… Triangle! Triangle! Triangle! Cow bell! More cow bell! One last ding. In today’s installment of Fantasy Baseball, Fun With Numbers, we’re going to look at some players for the last month and try to figure out if maybe the […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
You know that slo-mo video of Homer Simpson taking a cannonball off his belly? This looked more painful. When Carlos Santana, the future of the Indians franchise, went down in this collision, his knee said, “I wish I were Joe Theismann’s knee.” To stay in the world of The Simpsons, you can see the exact […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Matt Capps got traded and kept his job, Rauch didn’t get traded and lost his job, Octavio Dotel got traded and lost his job, Brian Wilson didn’t get traded but is moping because his shoes are no longer shiny. It’s the bullpens, ya’ll. Just yesterday Lindstrom was out with a sore back that he hurt […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
What I never understood about the trading deadline is why wait until the last second to make a trade? Did the Padres really wake up on July 31st and think they suddenly needed a bat? Wasn’t this apparent on April 2nd? I understand you don’t trade for pieces if you’re out of it, but the […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?The save vulture is a scavenger bird. They see weakness in others’ misfortune. A closer goes down or struggles and the save vulture swoops in and gnaws on the closer’s handcuff. Peck, Brandon League, peck. The save vultures are indigenous to rural and metropolitan areas, especially if a trade is in progress. Goodbye, Rauch. Hello, […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Roy Oswalt agreed to be traded to the Phillies after his son, Roy Oswalt Jr., broke it down to him, “Dad, the Astros suck, Ed Wade’s toupee’s been at half mast for years now and Ryan Howard Jr. promised to protect me from bullies.” Well, the first thing you know ol’ Roy’s a millionaire… Kinfolk […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?