by: Grey
Whenever I think of rookies playing for Dusty Baker, I think of the phrase, “Let them eat cake!” So here we are again with another Reds rookie, Devin Mesoraco. With Mesoraco, Cozart and Juan Francisco, I kinda want to take off my Zubaz and wear the Reds rookies as pants. And following that to its […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Peter Bourjos was one of my sleeper picks last year, so here we are doing our fantasy baseball 2012 sleeper posts with more of the same? Yawn! Hey, Random Italicized Voice, yawning and sleepers go hand in hand. I’m going to ignore you said that. Probably for the best. You know the Sciosciapath on the […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
On Dancer! On Prancer! On Comet! On–Oh, I didn’t hear you come in. Welcome, reader! Grab some egg nog and brandy it up to the fire. The 2012 fantasy baseball rankings are not far away. Right now, January Grey is throwing darts at a board to figure out where to place Matt Joyce. Exciting! In […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Yu Darvish is on his way to the States to pitch for the Rangers. Erik wrote a Yu Darvish 2012 fantasy post already. To pull some quotes from that article, “Darvish was once involved in a “major scandal” in Japan, where he was caught smoking,” “He also goes by the Persian name Farid, meaning ‘glorious,’” […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
When you play in a league where you’re required to draft at least one player that sounds like a dish from a delicatessen, who do you want? Kipnis or the Russian émigré, Kasha Varnishkes? Easy, Jason Kipnis. Even in leagues that aren’t drafted on the Upper West Side of Manhattan, Kipnis needs less selling than […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Before he was called up in the beginning of June, I expected Brett Lawrie would get a 15/15 season in three-quarters of a season. (I also had one of my favorite titles of the season, “Brett Lawrie on Toronto is One Delicious BLT.” Hehe, that still gives me the giggles. BTW, it’s okay for a […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
The Brewers signed Aramis Ramirez to a deal worth between $34-37 million. Wouldn’t you love to make so much money that there’s a gap of three million between what you might make? “Hey, Aramis, you got a second?” “I was just rolling up hundred dollar bills to make kindling.” “Just wanted to see if you’ll […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Ryan Braun tested positive for something. Maybe it was a performance-enhancing drug. Maybe it wasn’t a performance-enhancing drug just one that causes a positive test. Maybe he just drank sixteen bottles of Red Bull and made out with a stripper who had a cold sore. I don’t know. No one knows, but Ryan Braun. Some […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
As reported ad nauseum yesterday, Albert Pujols signed with the Los Angeles Suburb of Los Angeles Angels yesterday. Or the Albertaheim Pujalos, as they should now be called. Something that wasn’t reported, with Pujols going from a Cardinal to an Angel, Dan Brown now has a new book idea. After every home run, Pujols seemed […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?And just like with the Wayan Brothers, the Marlins like sequels. This offseason is a sequel to 1997’s spending spree. We’ll call this one, “Don’t Be A Miser In South Florida While Drinking Your Profits In The Hood.” Mark Buehrle signed on with the Marlins for $58 million. The Marlins are currently acting like they […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Sergio Santos was traded to the Blue Jays for Nestor Molina, no relation to Alfred. Santos will take over the Blue Jays closing job with Frank Francisco being waved away like a stale fart — Stank Fartcisco, if you will. Santos was made for this job. He’s a cyborg. A cyborg of Ks who was […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Oh, boy, Bill James has gone and done it again. His misguided love for all things Chris Davis has reemerged for Paul Goldschmidt. He gives him the 2012 projections of 93/32/99/.266/9. Wow. Maybe after Goldschmidt’s done curing cancer he can also invent a Facebook Dislike button so I can properly grade all of my so-called […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?