Hello, again. Hope all you Razzballers enjoyed my takes on how some bats in the West might be impacted by the DH. This time around I’ll take you through each team in the Central. Remember, folks, I’m not here to guess who will DH necessarily. I’m looking at the overall boost a player might get because of the likelihood of an extra hitter in the lineup being a thing. Think more along the lines of guys who would have platooned or had questionable status entering the season.

Welp, let’s jump right in, shall we?

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Let baseball return with the craziest shizz they got! Robot umps? Check! 7-inning games? Why not? Divisions changed? Sure! No shifts! No foul balls! Everything is in play! Pitchers have to throw with their wrong hand! Hitters have to stand on one foot! Mascots get stockpile of vaccines and choose who gets one! I don’t care! Just let baseball return! With all that said, universal DH is being thrown about like that somehow fixes baseball post-Covid-19. Has anyone on this green earth that Al Gore is eating his way through asked why? This is one that keeps coming back after every discussion about restarting baseball like they’ve already unplugged it and blew in the cartridge. Could someone, preferably a journalist, ask WHY? Why does a DH make things better for restarting? I’m guessing no one asks why because they know there’s no reason and it would just make Manfred uncomfortable. Shame more journalists don’t ask questions to make people uncomfortable. Not to go down that rabbit hole too far, but too many sports journalists (and maybe other types) are so concerned with access they refuse to ask tough questions, then they go on Twitter and make fun of the subject. Twitter is bad for a lot of reasons, but this is the reason number one for me. You see reporters say point blank about how stupid something is, but did they pose the stupidness to the actual subject? No, never. Prolly why I couldn’t make it as a journalist. If Manfred said to me about universal DH, I’d ask, why, and minds would be blown. Any hoo! Assuming there is a universal DH, our writer, JKJ, is going over a series of hitters who would benefit from it. I don’t want to go over what JKJ has said already, but Tyler O’Neill…O’Well, he’s too juicy to ignore. So, what can we expect from Tyler O’Neill in 2020 fantasy baseball and what makes him a great dart throw?

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Hello, again. It’s nice to be back in the saddle, writing up some fantasy baseball tidbits. I took a little hiatus after my COVID-19 Bargains series, but I’m kicking off a new one for yinz. If what’s on the grapevine is true, then we’ll finally get what I hope all of you have been waiting for: a DH for National League teams! I know you old-schoolers out there hate the idea – and trust me, I consider myself pretty old school in a lot of respects – but I don’t give two soggy turds about watching a pitcher try to hit a baseball. Some can do it okay, but the overwhelming majority cannot. It’s largely a meaningless at-bat, as far as I’m concerned. And let’s not even talk about pitchers running bases.

The 2020 fantasy baseball season is going to be a strange one, no doubt. I keep seeing this whole thing about 100 games and only three divisions total. Will these games be played in Spring Training parks? Regular parks? No one knows for sure. Are we gonna get doubleheaders like crazy? *shrug emoji* The latest proposal suggests regular home parks without fans, but we’ll see. For the sake of my sanity, I’m going to treat this series as if we’re gonna get regular home parks, and I’m going to categorize each team in their regular divisions, since that’s what we’re (read “I’m”) used to. Yes, Cardinals hitters facing more aces than just what the Cubs, Reds, Brewers, and Pirates would throw at them certainly changes things, but that’s true for every lineup if this proposal comes to fruition. I’m not going to sit here and analyze how Tyler O’Neill might fare against Matthew Boyd. I’m just going to point out some NL bats you might want to pay attention to since they may become regular instead of platooning. Capeesh? Obviously, if this division re-alignment happens, there has to be a universal DH. Either that or make the AL teams use a pitcher in the lineup. Who wants that? I sure as hell don’t.

Bear in mind, I’m not necessarily focusing on each team’s potential DH. This series is more about which NL bat benefits the most on each squad due to said DH. Could be because said bat might be said DH, or could be because said bat might be a better defensive option for another bat who could be said DH. Capeesh?

So, without further ado, here are my biggest risers were we to indeed get the lovely universal DH:

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Maybe the real-life baseball season has stopped, but that doesn’t mean fantasy baseball has to. It’s all we have these days, really. Fantasy sports while we fantasize about real sports coming back. I feel bad for my fellow fantasy hockey folks – I get the feeling it ain’t coming back, even if regular hockey does. I’m not about that fantasy basketball life (I dabbled in my younger years – Tracy McGrady anyone? Had to have him on all my teams), but I fear it’s the same fate. Only fantasy football is unscathed…so far. Wild stuff happening on that front, too. Brady to the Bucs? Da BUCS?! DAFUQ! Gurley and Newton RELEASED?! Hopkins TRADED?! Maybe Watson, too?! Madness, I say!

Anyway. This is a fantasy baseball article. Almost forgot. It’s an important year for the fine ladies and gents here at Razzball: the inaugural season of RazzSlam! Big shoutout to the NFBC peeps for hosting it. Give ’em a follow on the Twitter at @TheNFBC. I had the honor of being accepted into League 2 (of 18). Some scrub ass writer for CBS is in it. Big deal. I’m kidding, he’ll probably whoop my ass.

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We already gave you the top 50, so here’s the rest… of the top 100 outfielders for 2020 fantasy baseball. How’s that for a little SEO action? I’m a sad individual, I know. Well regardless, Grey Albright runs through his top 100 outfielders from 51-100, and gives you all the deets on who from this group is draftable, who’s too old, and who just stinks and is overrated. It’s Grey! You know you’re getting unfiltered opinions and truth bombs. Sorry guys but this is latest episode of the Razzball Baseball Podcast!

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You might remember ten years ago I drafted in the live LABR NL-Only auction. Okay, you don’t remember, but I do, so you’ll have to take my word for it. It was the first major league I was in. I was sailing on the wind of doves. I thought my feces smelled like Reese’s Pieces. I even joined the Local 564, a railway union, thinking LABR had something to do with that. Ah, the memories…they sure were fleeting! I was booted from the league after one year. Why? I’m not sure, but my money’s on I insulted someone. Well, ya boi’s back and he’s learned his lesson! Though, someone drafted Rhys Hoskins for $28 and I was cackling about that for a good 45 minutes. Yo, just send Rhys flowers and a ball in the dirt for him to swing through; he might respond quicker. For those of you not in the know, this is a 5×5 league with average. (If you want a shallower league, play against me and hundreds others for prizes –> Razzball Commenter Leagues.) Anyway, here’s my LABR 12-team, NL-Only draft recap:

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As we continue our 2020 fantasy baseball rankings, we head into the homestretch of ranking hitters. For those confused, homestretch isn’t when you shoot up in bed late at night, remembering there’s a bag of Doritos under your nightstand and go reaching for them. That is the opening to my short film, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dorito. The main character has just been “Frito-laid off” and is described as Pringley and Ruffled. Last year, this post had Franmil Reyes, Kyle Schwarber, and Lewis Brinson. Well, they’re not all gems. My point (PLEASE!) there is some value to still be found in the outfielders, it’s just a matter of finding it, like in the landmark film, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dorito. Here’s Steamer’s 2020 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Hitters and 2020 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Pitchers. As with the other rankings, my projections are included and where I see tiers starting and stopping.  Anyway, here’s the top 80 outfielders for 2020 fantasy baseball:

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Grey is back in the desert, and we have baseball to talk! After buying a new home in the fabulous Hollywood Hills, our fearless leader and his lady boss, have moved out to the desert while the house that Razz built is under construction. Instead of doing an episode of celebrity house flippers, we talk a little trade deadline. Will Zack Wheeler, Nick Castellanos, or Noah Syndergaard be moved? After we solve every teams needs we move onto some hot bats and arms over the last few weeks, touching on names like Tyler O’Neill (King In The North!!!), Jose Urquidy, Rogelio Armenteros, Asher Wojciechowski, and Ryan Yarborough among others. It’s another classic!

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Let me ask you something, is anyone hotter than Tyler O’Neill right now? Not to answer but to ruminate while ignoring both Gurriels, Ramon Laureano and Oscar Mercado.  The answer is obviously no. That O’Neill can play right!  Sorry, sorry.  One more!  O’Neill won the Nobel because he was out standing in a field!  Okay, okay, one more!  O’Neill picked up for La Stellllllllllllla, and it’s all that I Desire.  Okay, sorry, wrong guy that can play right, I mean, left. Won’t let it happen again. Get O’Neill on your team, and drop your Loman.  Wow, surprised you with my lies! So, O’Neill is playing every day with OZUNA nursing his truck driver’s ‘How’s your father’ finger and O’Neill might just be a hot schmotato for power, but he could also be breaking out. He’s merely 24 years old, and has 30-homer power (okay, everyone does, so maybe he has 40-homer power). His current average will fall, but who else do you want on that Long Day’s Journey Into Night.  I got another one in!  Theater nerd alert! Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

PSYCHE! Before we get into the post, Donkey Teeth and fellow football Razzballers have set up the RazzBowl. It’s played at NFFC, and it’s FREE.  FREE isn’t an acronym too, it’s the monetary cost, as in none.  The gist:  It’s Regular Joes vs. Pros in a Best Ball tourney.  Go there and sign up now!  Anyway II, the Buy/Sell:

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The Magic Genie of Fantasy Baseball says that if I put a baseball card of a player I own in a Dreamcatcher and put the Dreamcatcher under my pillow while I’m sleeping then *gulps* then the Magic Genie of Fantasy Baseball will come in the middle of the night and give my player a Quality Start.  So…*bashfully looks down*..I put Chris Paddack‘s baseball card under my pillow and I’VE BEEN A GOOD BOY!  Holy Hayzeus Lazarus and Pontius, Inventor of Pilates, I had a good start! Yesterday, Chris Paddack went 7 2/3 IP, 1 hit, 1 walk, 1 ER and 8 Ks, lowering his ERA to 2.70.  Please throw 170 more innings this year!  “Don’t be greedy,” interrupts Magic Genie of Fantasy Baseball.  “Hey, Magic Genie of Fantasy Baseball, you sound like a spot remover.”  “Just for that, I’m pushing Marquez back so he starts at Coors next!  Muahahaha!”  So, Paddack had a great start, which tacks onto his season of more-than-we-could’ve-hoped-for.  He currently ranks 25th for xFIP; 23rd for K/9 and 13th for walk rate.  And he’s in Petco for his home starts!  Happy to be the Mohel at his Star Mitzvah.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

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