A little about me:

I am old and cranky.

I know way more about baseball than you.

Many people automatically get four college credits simply for reading a single column of mine.

I am the only person to see the rookie years of both Ty Cobb and Bryce Harper.

I can steal signs from the catcher merely from feeling the breeze produced from his fingers.

I am so respected I have two Hall of Fame ballots each year.

I am a switch-hitter, ambidextrous and tri-sexual. Yes, that’s correct. I often have sex with a tricycle.

I am a vegan and will only play ball with a mitt made of cucumbers and lettuce.

I will see you next week…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

You read the title right. So, I guess I might have some splainin’ to do at the end of the year, but I’m proud to throw out the wildest, aka BOLDEST predictions out there. Trust me, these will all be two-drink minimum statements I’ll be laying down. But we ain’t calling this bold because I have a grudge against italics. And I’m not just spouting crazy for crazy’s sake… which I know, brace yourselves, is much different than you’re used to. I’m also going to be sharing evidence to support my claims. And everyone does 10-lists, so I’m going to be one better, cause that’s how I roll. Right down that hill over there. Hey, you want to punch that guy 10 times? Here I am, pushing you out of the way to hit him 11 times. Then I’m quickly running, cause those be sirens I hear. So, you’re going to eat 10 of those hot dogs? Well then, challenge accepted, I’ll eat 11 hot dogs, and then eat 11 Tums to wash it all down. You ain’t got nothing on me!

Please, blog, may I have some more?