“Who freaking cares.” That’s the question I asked myself as I sat down to write the 1,000th bold prediction article that you’re going to see this coming week. Listen, I love those types of articles. But me writing another bold predictions piece is basically like taking a piss in the ocean. It may feel good but it ultimately gets lost in the vast ecosystem, leaving absolutely no impact. I’m not really sure where my piss would have the most impact but I at least want my last article of the pre-season to be of benefit to you, my loyal reader. That’s why this week we’ll be looking ahead at favorable early-season matchups for you to take advantage of. Hold on a sec, let me go take a leak (in a toilet bowl) and then we’ll get started.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

As pitchers and catchers report we’re beginning to be graced with some reassurances as to who certain teams will use at closer. Those are always nice. Just remember managers don’t feel beholden to what they say in February and situations can change. Not unlike myself and fellow analysts. “I don’t recall recommending Jose Leclerc as a top 10 2019 closer, Senator.” We’re all playing a guessing game. My best advice is to invest lightly and spread your exposure over as many arms as possible.

AL East AL Central AL West

NL East NL Central NL West

Please, blog, may I have some more?