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Without a doubt, the greatest movie ever made is Martin Scorsese’s Gangs of New York. One of my favorite scenes is when Jenny (Cameron Diaz) ventures into the rich part of down to rob the affluent blind while dressed as a maid — a practice referred to as being a “turtle dove” in the film. As she pickpockets a flirtatious man’s wallet before getting off at her stop, he begins to get forward with her, asking if he may speak but trying to not be too ambitious with his remarks.

JENNY: I might like, sir. But I can’t say now.
MAN: Why?
JENNY: Because this is my stop.
MAN: May I walk with you a little, then?
JENNY (firmly): That — would be too bold.

At that point, Jenny exits and proceeds to rob countless New York City mansions blind. Absolutely classic. Now, think of today’s post the same way. We are going to be seriously bold, but we won’t be breaking bread with strangers. This is our Opening Day. Our chance to be the turtle dove and rob our leagues like none other. Be daring, but on your own accord. As long as no one recognizes you or gets wind of your plan, we’re in the clear. Luckily, the five players we’ll break down with bold predictions are former college starts turned MLB youngsters still waiting to make a name for themselves in The Show. Many are sleeping on them, but not us. Not today.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The end of the world. No, I’m not talking about WWIII, the continued collapse of the US Dollar/economy, or the next predicted apocalypse conspiracy. I recently spent the weekend in Montauk, celebrating a dear friend’s wedding. Montauk is colloquially known by Long Island residents as the “End of the World” because it is the easternmost […]

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Last week, we hit the top 10 prospects for 2022 fantasy baseball, and now — we’ll navigate into the top 20. It’s filled with Q-Bert references, jokes about dinner plans, an homage to hippie culture, my new rendition of a Lorde song, and more. It’s what you need to keep your wits about you when trying to figure out which prospects will garner enough playing time to be fantasy relevant in 2022 in the midst of the ongoing lockout. Who makes the top-20 cut? Who gets omitted like chicken in a McNugget? There will be no shortage of fiery opinions here, and the piece is somewhat lengthy, so let’s get into it, beginning with one of the more fascinating names on the list.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Sunday was not your typical deadline. Any time you get an elderly man from Sacramento at odds with a front office run by the richest MLB owner with the most-perfectly oval-shaped head in pro sports, things are bound to get interesting. And that’s precisely what happened on the August 1 MLB Draft-signing deadline, when two of the premier prospects in all of baseball were left without pro contracts. One went unsigned by his own choosing: Jud Fabian. The other as a result of the aforementioned scenario: Kumar Rocker. That makes the elderly man mentioned above none other than the infamous Scott Boras, who was looking about as youthful as Eustace Bagge from Courage the Cowardly Dog if you happened to catch a glimpse of him these past few weeks. Botox is like $350, just sayin’. For Rocker and Fabian, the future remains tremendously bright, albeit drastically different from the path we anticipated just one month ago. Now, we get to sift through the fallout and ramifications as it relates to both of these future stars — and while we’re at it, we’ll check in on some of the top prospects in baseball.

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It is I, Hobbstradamus, here to predict all things as it relates to the 2021 fantasy baseball season! Well, rather, here to make eight detailed predictions about the upcoming campaign, all of which have played some role in how I constructed my onslaught of 2021 fantasy teams. What if we call it Baseball Hobbspectus? Any better? No? Okay, I’ll keep trying. But no matter what we call this or how creative I try to get, in the end, these are not empty predictions. I have stock in all of these. While some are much bolder than others, all of the statements to follow, if true, will translate to a varying degree of success across my teams this year. So, close your eyes, walk slowly towards the creepy humming sound reverberating through the walls, and enter the void with me as we run through some of my favorite and more interesting predictions regarding the upcoming season.

Please, blog, may I have some more?