Pay By Shane Bieber

I could have written a sleeper post about Shane Bieber, and almost did, but ultimately chose not to. However, if you all paid attention during the offseason and drafting season you likely noticed a trend with my work. Shane Bieber kept showing up here, there, and everywhere. He’s my bold prediction, my AL CY award pick, featured in my article about soon-to-be free-agent players, and has shown up on nearly all of my drafted teams. It has been no mystery that I am a Belieber.

This offseason (prior to free agency) Bieber went to Driveline to work on his pitching mechanics and has found a way to regain his velocity. Up to 93 mph for the first time since 2021. And more importantly, increase the separation between his knuckle curve (and slider) and his four-seamer. That’s what was so successful for him in 2020 and 2021. And now his cutter has turned into a weapon too. It has nasty cut (duh) that runs in on the hands of lefties and leads to misses and easy ground balls. And the slider, it’s as good as it ever was. He’s on a mission.

Last night Bieber shut down the Mariners with a line of 6 IP, 6 hits (0 BB), 9 Ks after piling up 11 Ks the week before against the A’s. There were a few flyballs that looked dangerous, but all-in-all Bieber is looking great and is now off to a stellar start of the season with 12 IP, 20 Ks, 1 BB, 0 Runs scored. His command looked impeccable as he was dotting the outside corners and dropping sliders for whiffs. He had 11 swings and misses as a part of his 9 strikeouts with 7  against LHB. Why is that important? Take a look at these splits.

Season	Hand	K/9	BB/9	HR/9	K-BB%	AVG	OBP	SLG
2023	vs L	7.98	3.53	1.53	11.0%	0.288	0.350	0.483
2023	vs R	7.14	1.43	0.52	16.4%	0.220	0.257	0.335

Last season lefties hit him hard for a combined .288/.350/.483, that’s not good Bob. But this year already feels different. And those 7 Ks against lefties last night are a step in the right direction. Aside from the velo bump, something just feels different. He’s got his swagger and confidence back. Now I’m sure you might be thinking he hasn’t played any strong team yet; but, his division is pretty weak and the league as a whole is not trying to win much as there are only maybe 6 teams that are actually trying. I don’t make the schedule, I just look to exploit it.

The stars could not have aligned any better for a player to have a big resurgence year. Shane Bieber is coming up on his first free agency after what feels like a decade of being oppressed by his rookie contract under the Cleveland Guardians. Even after winning a Cy Young award, he didn’t get paid what he deserved. But now, the time has come and I don’t think he’s going to stay in Cleveland. He wants to get paid (especially seeing that Yamamoto contract).

[Chorus]
I throw the same pitch harder than I ever could
You missed the change, looking fastball like you should
I know you can’t with me on the mound, its true
I need that pay, need you to pay, hey (Oh)

[Verse 1]
I vowed to dominate, with every throw precise
No rival on the mound can compare to me
Each pitch, a masterpiece, a deal for the price
Oh, I’ll hit that upp-er corner with a strike-three

[Pre-Chorus]
Oh, ooh-woah (Oh, ooh-woah, ooh-woah)
Oh, ooh-woah (Oh, ooh-woah, ooh-woah)
Oh, ooh-woah (Oh, ooh-woah, ooh-woah)
Oh, I’ll hit that upp-er corner with a strike-three

[Chorus]
I throw the same pitch harder than I ever could
You missed the change, looking fastball like you should
I know you can’t with me on the mound, it’s true
I need that pay, need them to pay, hey
I throw the same pitch harder than I ever could
You missed the change, looking fastball like you should
I know you can’t with me on the mound, it’s true
I need that pay, need you to pay, hey

[Verse 2]
Don’t let me get away, 93 I can touch (Ooh)
You know that I know how to shove
I’ve been good I know this much (Ooh)
And I know my slider carves ’em up
Show some cash and my jersey is branded
‘Cause this Cy Young arm is right-handed
And you know that I know that I can’t pitch without you
So, baby, just pay

[Pre-Chorus]
Oh, ooh-woah (Oh, ooh-woah, ooh-woah)
Oh, ooh-woah (Oh, ooh-woah, ooh-woah)
Oh, ooh-woah (Oh, ooh-woah, ooh-woah)
Oh, I’ll hit that upp-er corner with a strike-three

[Chorus]
I throw the same pitch harder than I ever could
You missed the change, looking fastball like you should
I know you can’t with me on the mound, it’s true
I need that pay, need them to pay, hey
I throw the same pitch harder than I ever could
You missed the change, looking fastball like you should
I know you can’t with me on the mound, it’s true
I need that pay, need you to pay, hey

[Outro]
Woah-oh
I need that pay, need you to pay, hey

I hope you drafted Shane Bieber on your team(s), because that buy window is slamming shut as he looks primed for a big season that everyone had a chance at after pick 100. It’s going to be a good one. So what am I expecting from this re-energized Bieber? I see him putting together 178 IP with a 3.24 ERA, 1.10 WHIP, and a 9.8 K/9 on his way to his first big payday.

If you want more Coolwhip to top off your baseball experience, fantasy or otherwise, you can follow me on Twitter: @CoolwhipRB.