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Chris Carpenter left yesterday’s spring training game with a strained hammy.  That sounds delicious!  Unless, of course, you’ve drafted him already.  Then you’re like, “Jesus, Carpenter!”  But you shouldn’t have drafted him already.  You really shouldn’t draft until the last possible second in March.  You don’t want to lose your league before the season even starts, that’s not fun/fair.  Not to mention, I wouldn’t draft Carpenter.  I don’t trust him to stay healthy, even if recent history tells us I should.  I also don’t walk on the sidewalk cracks and sometimes check to make sure my door is locked seven times before leaving.  Hey, no one’s perfect.  The Cardinals say Carpenter will be fine in ten days or so.  I still say stay away.  Older pitcher coming off a 235 IP season who is already hurting?  I’m okay without that.  BTW, if you found this site by searching Google for “Jesus + Carpenter + what do Cardinals say?” you’re in the wrong place.  Sorry.  Anyway, here’s some more news for fantasy baseball:

Grady Sizemore – Won’t be ready until the middle of April.  Hopefully he’s taking this extra time to pose for some more nudie pictures of himself.  “Oh, darn, I got something on my pants.  Maybe I should remove them.”  That’s Grady playing coy, the only playing he’s been doing lately.

Nick Johnson – Signed with the Indians.  When the signing was announced, he seemed in good spirits.

Jake Peavy – From the files of Grey Will Never Learn, I’m starting to get excited about Jake Peavy again.  He’s supposed to make an appearance on Friday and should be ready for the start of the season.  All common sense is telling me Peavy will just get hurt again by June, but if he’s throwing well and healthy, I could see moving him up the ranks and drafting him at a discount.

Brandon Webb – News sounds positive about Webb throwing bullpen sessions.  Terrific, wonderful, awe to the some.  Whatever, my Peavy enthusiasm doth not runneth over to Webb.

Josh Beckett – Was hit by a batting practice ball and is showing concussion symptoms.  I’m not a doctor — in case you were wondering — but after losing Morneau for ten months to a concussion, I think this is just another reason to avoid Beckett.

Lance Berkman – Will DH for a bit because of a sore throwing elbow.  Sounds like minor news, but if this problem continues into the season, where’s he playing for the Cardinals?  Not 1st base.  I have a feeling all of those people drafting Berkman who are hoping for a bounce back are going to be yawnstipated.

Chris Iannetta – He hit a home run yesterday.  Already went over catchers to target, where Iannetta got some face time (Do I have to pay Steve Jobs a nickel for saying that?).  Oh, and I’ve already drafted Iannetta on one team.  Why won’t you draft him?  Afraid of success?  Aw, you underachiever, you.

Matt Thornton – February Grey waffled about whether Thornton would be the closer.  “Ooh, I’m February Grey and I can’t decide on the White Sox closer or what to eat for a snack.”  Eat Cheetos and draft Thornton with confidence.  Thank God that February Grey guy has a short month, huh?

Kyle McClellan – Looks to be the frontrunner for the fifth spot in the Cardinals rotation.  My take is Dave Duncan will sprinkle some of his magic dust on McClellan and he’ll be a valuable mixed league option by the end of the year.  He won’t be drafted in most leagues though, and I wouldn’t go against that outside of NL-Only leagues.  In NL-Only leagues, he’s the kind of pick that can help you win your league.

Brian Wilson – Dealing with a back issue of Men’s Health.  He says he’ll be all right.  I believe him.  Guy might be bonkers, but he’s got heart.  Still being drafted too high for me, so there’s that.

Corey Hart – Will be sidelined for two weeks with a strained abdominal muscle.  Don’t worry, the Hart Foundation will get its revenge!

  1. Steve says:

    Carp probably wishes it was yesterday once more.

  2. barker says:

    drafted this squad last night 12 team h2h mock 10 pick — most of the drafters were there 8-10 out of 12 for the most part — yahoo rankings are weird pitching goes way too early in/at yahoo

    C posada 17
    1b a gon 1
    2b uggla 4
    3b wright 2
    ss desmond 11
    OF mccutchen 3
    OF pence 5
    OF bruce 6
    util stanton 8
    util ortiz 13
    SP liriano 7
    SP scherzer 9
    RP k rod 12
    RP kimbrel 16
    P morrow 10
    P dempster 14
    P d hudson 15
    P lyon 18
    BN edwin jackson 19
    BN frank frank 20
    BN sale 21
    BN johan 22
    BN mcgee 23

    probably too many closers but hedged my bets and maybe a little light on stls — the staff is solid if not spectacular — couldnt pass on the DHing posada in the 17th — dont like ortiz but hoping for another 30 hrs — felt compelled to take desmond there is it too early because it felt that way

    what say u grey ?

  3. Doug Ault says:

    Considering how crappy Beckett was last year,I see the bonk on the noggin an omen of a comeback season.I can already hear the ” I think that bonk to the noggin knocked some sense into him” comments, come August……’s just poetic justice ;-)

  4. Trick dad says:

    Morse hit 2 homers the other day, does he get a boost in the rankings? Worth a late round sleeper pick?

  5. NewBVick says:

    While I think Peavy will be good when/if he pitches, that if is just too big for me right now to invest. Who is enabling you in your Peavy addiction? Either way it will probably get fleshed out during the intervention.

  6. Tony says:

    Brian Wilson, if closing fails, has a job in the WWF. Anyone who can talk in 3rd person like that dude has a future….

  7. EarlyBird says:

    Grey, don’t you think by drafting early you can get some value? By the end of March won’t people I’m getting very late (like Tabata, D Hudson, Yo-lease, Frank-Frank) be more accurately valued by the general public?

  8. High Upside says:

    Crunchy or puffs on the cheetos?

  9. Are you avoiding Morneau this season or looking at him as a value pick? I see his ADP dropping and wondering if people are overreacting.

  10. Bartaksu says:

    Elvis Andrus, still trying to figure his ranking out (generally at least like/understand the rest of them). Are you predicting low BA/high OBP or low on both? With the number of runs and SBs you have him down for, I’d figured the average would be better.

    Finally, how high would you grab him in a freshly drafted Dynasty (6×6, standard rosters and cats plus OPS, Holds)?

    Thanks Grey’s mustache!

  11. quimmy says:

    @ALL: in a 15 team 7×7 roto league with OBP and TB+BB as the 2 xtra cats, who are you taking at the rd 2/3 (picks 30 and 31) if u selected PooHoles with the 1st pick:

    Need 2



  12. @quimmy: I took Upton in a similar situation but considering you might need an MIF you might want Kinsler. Uggla and Heyward are good too. Tough decision.

  13. uncdrew says:

    Jebus was a carpenter, that’s why it’s funny…

    I say Jebus so when Jesus scans the net for who’s making fun of him he can’t find me.


  14. quimmy says:

    @frank kim: yeah man. I can’t decide. I don’t know why, but I feel like taking kinsler and JUP back to back is taking a big risk very early in the draft. I have it in my head that I can’t draft both. Arggg.

  15. @quimmy: Forgot you have two picks.

    I’d go JUP and Kinsler. There is risk but Heyward has risk too. Will he improve significantly from his rookie year? He also an injury history including the minors.

    However I must admit I am not including the 2 extra categories, OBP and TB+BB. Heyward obviously shines in BB and Uggla in TB.

    Sorry I’m not helping much. I’d still go JUP and Kinsler.

  16. Tony B. says:

    Hart Foundation will get its revenge! Ha!

    “Here comes the Anvil, there’s the Bulldog! Here comes Owen Hart to help Bret, it’s a 4 on 1 ambush! This ain’t fair, dammit, someone get out here and help!” – Jim Ross

  17. Eddy says:

    @Tony B.:

    Ha! I can hear Jim Ross say that perfectly, his cowboy hat falling off and everything.

  18. papasmurf says:

    I just wanna gloat a bit that I was on the Brian Wilson bandwagon before most people back in preseason ’09. (I was also perennially high on Kearns back in the good ole days when ‘iPad’ meant “I pad” as in stuffing one’s bra/pants, not some fancy jiggamagoo gadget, so this was luck more than anything else. But do allow a smurf to have one moment of glory.) Now that Wilson’s gone from undervalued to overvalued, I wouldn’t pick him.

    I am on the KROD bandwagon this year. Just keep old man Carlos’ face away from his fists of fury!

  19. Steve Stevenson says:

    @quimmy: I’d go J-Up and Uggla. Upton and Heyward are basically a tossup in that format, but I’d go with Upton to balance Uggla’s lack of steals. Uggla is a beast in this format. I’ve played in an OBP league for years and he’s always returned great value, and the addition of TB further inflates his value, both because he scores well in that category and because the addition of the category dilutes the hit of his negative value in SB and AVG.

  20. Wilsonian says:

    So I’m struggling to pick my last keeper in an 8 Team H2H money league. We have the traditional 5 categories and also have Hits and OBPS. Right now my keepers are:

    Fielder, Longo, Wright, Kemp, CarGo. I’m trying to deal CarGo before our deadline tonight at 7:00 p.m., but if I can’t, I’m struggling on whether or not I should even keep him. The issue is: I have Holliday that I could keep as well.

    If I go by your rankings, I should keep Holliday, but I’m at a loss. I have the 8th and 9th pick and would assume that Holliday would have a better chance at making it back to me over CarGo (knowing my leaguemates), but I’d ‘preciate some advice from the Razzball Nation out there.

    Thanks gentlemen (and lady).

  21. trick dad says:

    I have Beltre at 3B but really want to upgrade. Not sure I’m comfortable with him. I also have Votto and Tex at 1B… Should I trade away Tex for Zimmerman? Am I giving away too much if I give Tex and Beltre for Zimmerman and VMart?

  22. quimmy says:

    @Steve Stevenson: thx. i am on the same side of thinking as you as far as coupling JUP and Uggs. what about Grey’s thinking that Uggla and Hill are almost the same player?

  23. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Steve: Hehe

    @barker: I think if there’s only 8-10 drafters it’s far from accurate results. With that said, team looks light on average, and your pitching is pretty weak.

    @Doug Ault: True

    @Trick dad: Does he have a starting job?

    @NewBVick: Ha

    @Tony: True

    @High Upside: Crunchy

    @Frank Kim:

    @Bartaksu: I’m predicting .270 average and 95 Runs, don’t think I’m low on either.

    @quimmy: You can’t go wrong with any of them, Heyward, Kinsler…

    @uncdrew: Ha

    @Tony B.: Ha!

    @papasmurf: Yeah, K-Rod is a good value pick this year.

    @Wilsonian: Stick with CarGo in a keeper over Holliday.

    @trick dad: I’d do Tex for Zimmerman.

  24. @Grey: Love your rankings. Using them religiously. I was just wondering if the latest news is making you more or less nervous about him.

  25. Steve Stevenson says:

    @quimmy: I think Hill will bounce back too, but there are 2 things I’d say to that argument. 1) In your league format, if they both have a good year, they will have close to the same stats, with the glaring exception of OBP–Hill will top out around .330, while Uggla’s always in the .350-.360 range. In my OBP league (12-team, 3 OF), it usually takes about .375 to win, and average is in the .350 range, so it’s hard to be competitive if you have more than one OBP drain in your lineup. 2) There’s something to be said for consistency, especially in your 3rd round pick. I’m much more comfortable with Uggla there than Kinsler, though if you could get a soon to be 3B-eligible Youk there and take Hill late, that’s not a bad tradeoff.

  26. Frank Rizzo says:

    I’m not that fond of anyone on this list other than Thornton and probably won’t own any of them. However, I was wondering about Berkman as a flier at the very end of the draft. I’m not expecting any of the old numbers he put up but from what I’ve read, he could be swapping spots in the order with Rasmus based on LH and RH pitching….so he would be batting either 2nd, before Albert, or 5th behind Holliday. There’s got to be some value there, wouldn’t you think?

  27. Commish Cauda says:

    Speaking of you NL-only auction, I see you selected Chris Dickerson in the reserve rounds. Was he just a flyer, or do you like him to win the OF job more than Carlos Gomez?

  28. Al-D says:

    what pick/round of the draft would you start looking at closers?

  29. Carl Spackler says:

    Grey couple questions about closers out there. Is Farnsworth or McGee the guy to have in TB? Frank Frank in Toronto? Gregg in Baltimore? Also I thought I read last year that Ryan Franklin was retiring? Do you forsee Motte taking over anytime soon? Last one, is Rodney the man for the Halos?

  30. johnny says:

    Money league 5×5, We keep 10. 10 Teams
    c,c,1,2,3,ss,mi,ci,5OF,x,x 10 Pitcher
    mccann, Tulo, Longoria, Kemp, Braun, Sizemore, Ubaldo
    Cory Hart, Andres Torres, Carlos Santana, Paul Konerko, Desmond Jennings, Dominic Brown
    After the Ubaldo, which 3 do I keep

  31. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Frank Kim: Not yet.

    @Frank Rizzo: If it were the old Berkman, sure. It’s not though. You’ll be lucky to get 130 games from him and 22 homers.

    @Commish Cauda: Carlos Gomez sucks at baseball, so yeah I do like Dickerson in NL-Only leagues.

    @Al-D: Around 100 to 120 overall.

    @Carl Spackler: Farnsworth, Frank Frank, Gregg, Rodney and Franklin… All are closers as of right now.

    @johnny: Hart, Santana and Konerko…

  32. FishMan says:

    Grey, no mention of the Utley MRI? What are your thoughts on him for this year, or is it just too early to tell yet? How can you do injuries and neglect a guy who has dropped the F Bomb twice on TV? F me? F U! And mommies all over Philly are still naming their kids after him.

  33. jim says:

    Got a draft this weekend, Move peavy to around 60th SP?

  34. Grey

    Grey says:

    @FishMan: I’m obviously in denial. We’re still a month out until games matter, hoping he’ll be fine. Also waiting for some concrete news.

    @jim: Depends on how his Friday game goes, but 60 sounds about right.

  35. AJK says:

    after this injury, in what order would you draft cain, carp, latos, buchholz and marcum

  36. Commish Cauda says:

    Speaking of Peavy…

    20-team, H2H-Points, Salary Cap Keeper League
    $70 cap
    11 bats/9 arms (5SP, 4RP)

    Would you trade Sabathia $7 for Peavy $2 and Porcello $2?

  37. Nathan says:

    Dear Grey,

    I wanted to thank you for all the work you’ve done on this site. I’ve been able to dominate my friends in out league we started up two years ago. I’ve won two years in a row!

    Anyway we started up a keeper league last year and I was wondering who I should keep We get 6 and I know I’m keeping Pujols, Hanley, CarGo and Heyward. For the last two spots I need to decide between Phillips, Rasmus, Bruce, Ubaldo, Liriano or Josh Johnson. And advice?

  38. Grey

    Grey says:

    @AJK: I wouldn’t draft Latos or Carp.

    @Commish Cauda: Nope

    @Nathan: No problem. Phillips and Liriano… Tough choice on the last one. Would definitely go with an SP though.

  39. J says:

    As always, love the stuff on this site. Sunday morning is dreadful pirate (pun point!) without a little razz. What are your thoughts on McGehee? He is coming off a pretty impressive season – does it continue? Is he for real?

  40. Cain Fan says:

    6×6 keeper league with R, RBI, HR, SB, OBP and Ks for bats. Rank the following OF:

    BJ Upton


  41. Bob says:

    Hey Grey, do you think you can post rankings at each position based on who YOU would draft based on where they’re going in drafts? In other words, value rankings. For example, your top 4 rankings for catchers are McCann, Mauer, VMart, Posey. That’s great to know, but you said you’re not drafting any of those players based on where you would have to take them. So then who are your top 4 based on ADP? Something like Napoli, Montero, Soto, Wieters. If we had like a top 20 or more at each position, I believe that would be an extremely helpful tool on draft day for everyone. Hope this makes sense…thanks for everything!

  42. Eddy says:

    You know, you may be onto something with this Peavy ordeal. His Yahoo! ADP is 303. He’s a guy who has a career 8.93 K/9 and even though he owns a career 3.91 ERA in away games, in the last 3-4 rounds of a draft, you could do MUCH worse. The dude is only 29.

  43. Grey

    Grey says:

    @J: Thanks for the kind words! I talk about McGehee in the 3rd baseman rankings.

    @Cain Fan: Rasmus, Rios, Victorino, Upton…

    @Bob: I feel like I do that between my positional rankings and top 300.

    @Eddy: Don’t fuel my fire!

  44. Eddy says:


    He kind of has been doing this already. He has two posts entitled “2B to target” and “Catchers to target” that details which players HE wants from each position. For the most part they’re in the order he wants them as well, but if you’re unsure, just refer to his top 100 or 300.

  45. Eddy says:


    I can’t help it!

    He had his highest HR/9 last year since 2003, worst strand rate in his career, lowest K/9 since 2003, and worst WHIP since his rookie year.

    I’m still a little cautious about his home park and his move to the AL, but hey, if it’s him or Big Z, I’m taking him.

    Burn, baby, burn!

  46. Wilsonian says:

    @Eddy: dammit guys, you need to shut your mouths when you’re talking to me! Seriously, you keep this shizz up, he’s gonna be the first SP I take in my upcoming draft. (emoticon)

  47. Bob says:

    @Eddy: so then according to Grey’s Top 300, McCann is ranked 40 and he currently has an ADP of 29 according to MDC. Grey wouldn’t take McCann at 29, but he would take him at 40? Is that what I’m understanding with his ranks? Or is 40 still too early if he was still available?

  48. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Eddy: Ha

    @Bob: Preferably, I’m taking a 1st baseman then a 3rd baseman then an OF or MI then a pitcher. That brings us to around pick 60, McCann’s gone so there’s no drafting him. If he’s still there, then sure.

  49. @Grey: Have successfully followed the 1B, 3B, best OF left, then 1st Pitcher in a couple early larger leagues. & I know that it depends greatly on who might fall, but where in a small 10 Team League might you project selecting your first Pitcher? Thanks; & please keep the edgy Jesus-Carpenter stuff spewing as to decelerate your expanding readership!

  50. Grey

    Grey says:

    @zombie: I’d take my first pitcher around the same spot, but I wouldn’t hesitate about taking two number two’s.

  51. JustMatt says:

    @Grey: only days away from your LABR of love weekend. Cocksoft took a page out of your book and just compiled his Ideal Team. He drafted out of the 8th slot and stole Miggy in the SECOND round. Please put the hurt on these tool bags. (p.s. – his Ideal Team still finished second when he compared it against expected league averages)

  52. Grey

    Grey says:

    @JustMatt: I saw the post and thought his team looked fine. It is a bit of a cheat though when your site says something absurd like Miggy should be 13th then you steal him. You can’t steal a guy that you’re ranking.

  53. M.D. says:

    @Grey: GREY?!? whatsup stache! What are your thoughts on the recent news that Duensing is a lock for the rotation (per Gardenhire)? I know his k-rate is horrible, but might be a good value pick for below 4 ERA and decent whip in the late rounds. Would this change your projections for him?

  54. Grey

    Grey says:

    @M.D.: I could see picking him up off waivers if he’s going well, I wouldn’t draft him anywhere outside of AL-Only leagues.

  55. Wilsonian says:

    @Grey: I would just like to point out that sometimes after I eat myself silly with some Taco Bell (home of the 33% beef beef [stutterer]) that I don’t hesitate about taking two number two’s…it’s usually the third number two that really makes me think twice…


  56. Steve says:

    Coco nailed for DUI.

    Why didn’t he just run away in 90-foot increments?

  57. Eddy says:


    Austin Kearns as well.

    There has to be some witty joke to explain these DUIs this off season. I just can’t think of one.

  58. Smokey

    Smokey says:

    @Eddy: Maybe they listened to Kim Kardashians new song

  59. Up in this Mug says:

    Grey, are you planning to do any posts on the players with significant gaps between Yahoo!/ADP rankings and yours?

    I loved those last season.

  60. MindiCohn says:

    totally off topic but Mrs Garrett is buggin’ me on this as she keeps debating her keepers…She’s been offered Mike Stanton $11 for her Mat Latos $14…Any by her, i mean me…

  61. Dexter says:

    Hey Grey,
    You mentioned you like to draft 3 guys in your top 40. But in H2H you mentioned quantity over quality. In a 12 team H2H, 5×5. Ideally, how many of those top 40 guys are you shooting for? What rounds are you thinking of drafting SPs? Take 1-2 in the top 40 and then backfill?

  62. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Dexter: In my top 40 of what?

  63. Dexter says:

    Sorry. Top 40 of SPs. I know you don’t need a bunch of higher end SPs. In years past I’ve generally taken 6 hitters then filled in with a few SPs and by pick 15 i’m about 7:7 with hitters:SPs/Closers. I’m just wondering if it should be much more hitter heavy in those first 14 rounds and a H2H.

  64. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Dexter: No, that sounds about right.

  65. GopherDay says:

    @Grey: Don’tknow if you saw it, but Elvis is on the top of all three Yahoo ‘perts “5 Shortstops You’ll Shy Away From”


  66. Grey

    Grey says:

    @GopherDay: That sounds wonderful. Shy away, people. Shy away.

  67. GopherDay says:

    @Grey: How many league drafts have you done so far?

  68. Grey

    Grey says:

    @GopherDay: Actually three, but Smokey drafted one of them.

  69. GopherDay says:

    @Grey: A’ight, how many leagues are you (Razzball) doing this year?

  70. Giggles McGehee says:


    14 team 5×5 (5 OF) roto keeper. Would you focus on OF next few rounds and wait on 2B? Or should I look for value at 2B first?

    M.Cab (k)
    Votto (k)
    D. Wright (k)
    J. Hamilton (k)
    A. Ramirez

  71. Francis says:

    Anyone know if Baseball Monster projections are worth paying for ($24)?

  72. GopherDay says:

    @Francis: I wouldn’t pay for projections when there is so much free information out there… ‘Cust Kayin

  73. Camel Turf Toe says:


    To piggyback on zombie, and not two avoid your taking two number twos, but rather because of a similar small ten team league,

    where might you project selecting your first donkeycorn RPs? More specifically, what round would you start to develop an itchy trigger finger for one of your “you might be able to draft one of these” tier guys?

  74. Grey

    Grey says:

    @GopherDay: Not sure… Maybe 8, I have Pianow’s tomorrow.

    @Giggles McGehee: I have no idea who’s available, but I’d go 2nd base.

  75. Commish Cauda says:

    deep league, MI bench depth…Macier Izturis or Alberto Gonzalez?

  76. go9ers says:

    I almost fell out of my chair when I clicked on the Nick Johnson link! Good work Grey – best fantasy columns by far.

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