When Kennys Vargas first arrived on the major league baseball scene, people were like, “Is he a switch hitter or are there two of them?”  Then when it turned out there were multiple Kennys, people started gossiping like they were in a sewing circle, “Is it fair if there’s more than one Kenny in the batter’s box at once?”  To those people I submit, it could be worse, they could’ve stayed Siamese twins.  Did you know both Kennys got in a fight when a reporter asked them if they’d seen their slash line lately?  They pointed to their Siamese twins separation scar and said they see it every day.  (I’m just going by what I saw on the latest Ken Burns documentary.  If Kennys is one person and was never a Siamese twin, I sincerely apologize.  By the by, never trust anyone who says they sincerely apologize.  They’re trying too hard to be believable.  I saw that on another documentary.  Netflix’s motto, “We Prove People Will Watch Documentaries.”)  Last year, Kenny/Kenny hit 9 homers and .274 in 53 games.  Crown Kenny-slash-Kenny the new Babe Ruth and name multiple candy bars after them.  “I’m Heath and I’m Skor, and we’re the same but separate.”  That’s the Kennys in a commercial.  Okay, so 9 homers in 53 games isn’t exactly the meow’s cat, until… Oh, no, here comes The Prorater!  Run, it’s The Prorater!  Four women and children first!  The Prorater tells me that Kennys would’ve had 27 homers in a full season, and that would’ve just about led the league.  Damn, that last part didn’t sound like The Prorater but more like Hyperbole Man.  So, what can we expect of Kennys Vargas for 2015 fantasy baseball and what makes him a sleeper?

Well, dur, he’s not being drafted until the last rounds.  That goes a long way to being a sleeper.  If he can stop swinging at everything, that would also go a long way to helping him.  For players with 230 plate appearances last year, he had the 25th highest swinging strike rate.  Having a high swinging strike rate is a good way to have a shizzy average.  C’mon, Kennys, get it together — that’s not another Siamese twin crack.  Swinging at balls outside the strike zone can also hurt, and he does that too.  Adam Jones, Jose Abreu, Carlos Gomez were as equally ‘bad’ as Kennys.  Though, those (almost stutterer!) guys do make better contact with pitches outside the strike zone.  (Hit a ball outside the strike zone and it’s not usually hard contact, but at least you’re hitting it.)  His ability to make contact with balls inside the strike zone is just above league average, but, when he hits it, the ball goes a long way.  The good news is at one point he had contact issues in the minors too.  In Rookie ball, he had a 26.2% strikeout percentage, then the next year he had 22% then 20.2% and finally in Double-A it was 16.8%.  That’s right, he never even played in Triple-A, so it’s understandable he struggled in the majors.  Oh, and as mentioned in the intro paragraph, he didn’t struggle that much; he did hit .274 (though with a high BABIP).  You didn’t hear much about Kennys before his call-up, because he’s not that exciting in real baseball terms.  He’s got the agility of a drunk sloth, and is slated to DH.  In fact, he won’t have 1st base eligibility in ESPN leagues, because he only played there 13 games last year.  He could get it during the year — who knows what will happen with Joe Mauer — but he’s just a UTIL bat in leagues that need 20 games played at a position.  Since his power is real and beautiful, I definitely like the late-round gamble on him.  For 2015, I’ll give him 74/25/83/.251 with upside from there.  Just don’t ask him about his slash line.

  1. Nimrod says:
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    Happy Holidays to you Grey and Cougs. During the coarse of the pre-season, could you do a blog about the strategy on drafting for a start two at each position (C,1B,2B 3B,SS) five outfielder league format. We draft 15 position players and 10 pitchers plus 4 reserves in a weekly format. It’s a competitive high stakes 12 team money league with standard scoring plus OPS. With pitching wins and net wins as two of the pitching cats I adhere to your thoughts that pitching is deep and draft hitters for the 1st 4- 5 rounds. Thank you.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Nimrod: Thanks, Nimrod, you too! I’ll see what I can do since you asked so nicely…

  2. Lville Jim says:
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    Had some trouble connecting to the Razzball site earlier this morning. Thought maybe you had made some disparaging remarks about Kim Jong Un recently.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Lville Jim: Haha… Yeah, there was some issues but now it’s resolved…

    • Mantis Toboggan MD says:
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      @Lville Jim: it was out for a few hours there starting in the middle of night hours (maybe somewhere around 2 central is started)

  3. El cuñado says:
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    Grey, others, hello! I can keep two of Trout, Rizzo, Jones, Rendon. I’m considering NOT keeping Jones for Rizzo. That crazy?

    • Baezaworldseries says:
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      @El cuñado: First base is thin. If you keep 2, the draft should be loaded with OF. I would keep Rizzo.

    • JeF With 1 F says:
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      @El cuñado: Im keeping Trout and Rizzo

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @El cuñado: Trout, Rizzo sounds fine,, you can’t go wrong with Trout and any of them…

      • El cuñado says:
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        @Grey: Thanks gents!

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          No problem

  4. nick the dick says:
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    I’ve been saying it for years and i’ll say it again…Heath bar doesn’t hold a candle to Skor bar. It’s hardly even close.

      • J-FOH says:
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        @Grey: heath bar!

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Skor!

          • J-FOH says:
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            @Grey: I skored a heath bar?

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              On the grill?

              • J-FOH says:
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                @Grey: with a knife

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  Ha

      • nick the dick says:
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        @Grey: You heard me. I stand by it til death.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Why the love?

          • nick the dick says:
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            @Grey: Top 5 chocolate candy bar. Write it down, take a picture I dont give a fuuuuu!

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Haha, wow, passionate on that… I won’t even mention Almond Roca…

              • nick the dick says:
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                @Grey: Dont you dare! Haha… stunts, blunts, and skor bars!

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  Ha!

            • Sky

              Sky says:
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              ‘Skor’ is Swedish for ‘shoes’. Just sayin…

              • Grey

                Grey says:
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                Mmm…Toffee feet…

                • Sky

                  Sky says:
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                  C’mon Grey, portmanteau dat!

                  • nick the dick says:
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                    @Sky: big missed opportunity

                    • Sky

                      Sky says:
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                      I need the ‘factual’ and ‘accurate portmanteau – Facturate – to become more heavily used.

                  • Grey

                    Grey says:
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                    Oh, my bad!

              • nick the dick says:
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                @Sky: everyone loves hand made things, why not feet made?

                • Sky

                  Sky says:
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                  I’ll take my wine grapes pressed that way. Not sure I want any extra flavors in my chocolate.

    • JeF With 1 F says:
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      @nick the dick: they both suck

      • nick the dick says:
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        @JeF With 1 F: You’re way off. Way way off.

  5. nick the dick says:
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    Upton to the Padres now too, holy moly

    • Baezaworldseries says:
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      @nick the dick: Who will play center?

      • nick the dick says:
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        @Baezaworldseries: Probably put Myers in left and put both Kemp and Upton in right and just pitch to the corners

    • Montezuma's Revenge... right now says:
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      @nick the dick: wow ATL really going all the way with punting this year, huh? they still haven’t moved c.johnson yet though.

  6. gareth says:
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    Padres on record to say they are happy with starting either Kemp or Myers in center field. Yikes!

    I just read a rumor that the Padres could flip Myers for Profar.

    Padres and A’s are transaction crazy this offseason!

  7. Challenge Guy says:
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    Wow crickets on a Twins topic. Shocking. Whatever, Kenny Squared has a pretty clear path to a lot of ABs either at DH or 1B for the inevitable “its too taxing for Mauer to play the field” stage of the season. K2 is a beast; slow and probably won’t age well but shows enough power to get over at Target Field. Definitely on my radar.

    • Baezaworldseries says:
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      @Challenge Guy: Twins topic is where I got this shirt. You can’t see it, but it is overly aggressive with shiny stuff.

  8. Baezaworldseries says:
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    It has been a great week for Padres fans. Do they still have those?

    • @Baezaworldseries: Based on my 10 years in SD: No, they really don’t have “traditional” fans as most of the residents there that follow baseball are transplants. But…if there gonna actually be good, people might start going again.

  9. JeF With 1 F says:
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    Well now i wont be touching J.Upton this year

    • KB says:
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      @JeF With 1 F: I was planning on keeping or trading him this offseason but now his value has plummeted.

      • Montezuma's Revenge... right now says:
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        @KB: why, BP has SD park factors (3 year) only slightly below ATL’s. And now SD’s lineup is at least as good as ATL’s (remember them being 2nd worst to SD in runs last year). Biggest difference is that there’s 2 good stadiums for road games COL/ARI vs only one in divisional games for ATL (PHI). I’m going from BP 2014 obv, since 2015 isn’t out yet. NYM/WAS/ATL/MIA are awful parks for offense in general. SD is only slightly worse than ATL and COL/ARI are a lot better than all the others except PHI. PHI is quite a bit ranked higher than ARI by these metrics though.

      • JeF With 1 F says:
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        @Grey: Yeah i dont think hell be bad…just not what i was hoping for.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Agreed

      • JeF With 1 F says:
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        @Grey: Would have loved him at METCO instead of PETCO

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Mets are gonna get Tulo and watch as him and Wright are injured half the year… I’ll never understand the Mets…

          • JeF With 1 F says:
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            @Grey: Oh God NOOOO

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Hehe

  10. Sky

    Sky says:
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    No one talked about him, eh? My recollection of me says different! I had him as a deep league talk with Nick around the All-Star break. It’s probably an unfair comparison, but many were talking about how his swing reminded them of David Ortiz in the organization. So if that’s true, he’ll have a couple of so-so years with them and then go onto a team that actually wants to win and he’ll start hitting 30+ bombs a year while simultaneously starting to look like Florida Evans. Fun times!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Sky: I meant no prospect hounds talked about him in the prospects… Cause he does nothing but hit the ball far… I.e., he’s more of a fantasy guy than real baseball…

      • Sky

        Sky says:
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        Ah gotcha. Big boys with big bats also mature slower typically. Might be that people don’t consider him worthy of interest until he’s closer to his prime years.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Yeah, that could be…

  11. royce! says:
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    Now there’s talk of the Padres sending Hanigan to BOS for Middlebrooks…This is turning out to be the most exciting Padres off season ever. I half (er, maybe wholly) expected them to call it a day after obtaining Barmes. I don’t even think I give a crap about whether all of the trades will prove to be wise, and it appears that the term Hodgepadre might not see much use this summer, but who cares, because I might even try to pay attention to the game when I go to Petco!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @royce!: What’s got into your Padres?

      • royce! says:
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        @Grey: It’s highly suspicious…

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          And exciting for you, Padre-heads!

          • royce! says:
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            @Grey: I prefer to call Padres fans Pad People, a la Invasion of the Body Snatchers

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Oh, yeah, that works…

    • J-FOH says:
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      @royce!: new ownership trying to make a splash and wn back fans is nothing new. Enjoy the excitement and pray they bring back the brown and mustard

      • royce! says:
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        @J-FOH: It’s something new for the Padres, I assure you…I think the last time they did something like this was trading for Kevin Brown prior to the 1998 season.

      • royce! says:
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        @J-FOH: And I fully support bringing back the brown…not sure if the mustard is necessary, but at least the brown

    • JeF With 1 F says:
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      @royce!: your right ..it would be nice if all of the moves worked out but even if they dont, they are a far more interesting team now.

  12. Alcibiades Escobar says:
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    Grey,

    Would Upton to SD make you reevaluate keeping him? Here’s my list of keepable players. 10 team 6×6 H2H (obp and avg.) league, keep 5 forever.

    Upton
    Adam Jones
    Carlos Gomez
    E5
    Altuve
    Kluber
    Soler
    Machado

    I could also keep fewer than 5 and get extra picks at beginning of draft. Thanks as always.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Nah, I’d still keep him

      • Alcibiades Escobar says:
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        Thanks Grey. Would you consider keeping 4 in order to go for Kris Bryant with what would effectively be the the 50th pick? No guarantee he’d be there…

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Nope

  13. Bye Felicia says:
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    How about them Padres!
    Lol, I’m really impressed that they all of the sudden grew balls. Starting to like a semi contender out west. Now if they can move in the fences, staff stays healthy for a season, they can possibly stay relevant next year.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Considering they signed Morrow and Johnson, the stay healthy thing is likely huge…

  14. Gonzo_The_Great says:
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    Great post as always. It’s funny- at the end of the season I wrote down my sleepers I wanted to remember to draft next year and you’ve already managed to hit half of them.

    Either I read too much Razzball or you’re doing some kind of advanced telepathic Kung-fu on me. I think it’s obviously the latter.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      It’s all about control…My telepathic kung fu…

  15. Wake Up says:
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    You can’t hit you’re way off the island…but you can walk on water if you’re Heyzeus…and you can run on it, if you’re attached to Kenny’s…actually maybe there’s not two of him, and he is always implying that everything is his…Who’s Vargas is it? Kenny’s. Who’s being super diacritical? Not me. All the apostrophe’s are Prezzii’s…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Ha… Prezii does have a monopoly on them…

      • JeF With 1 F says:
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        @Grey: Did he go off to college or something

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Who? Prezii?

          • JeF With 1 F says:
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            @Grey: Yea his baby face has been MIA

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Totally

        • Prez says:
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          @JeF With 1 F: haha! colege…nice… im posting a pic of me with my newly grown beard! babyface my ballsack snitchesssss

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Ha

    • Wake Up says:
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      @J-FOH: Hahhaha…that reminds me off 3 boobs…mmm, 3 boobies!

      • J-FOH says:
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        @Wake Up: mission accomplished

    • JeF With 1 F says:
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      @JeF With 1 F: And this one goes out to Nick and J-FOH

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Haha, oh man… Ha…

          • JeF With 1 F says:
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            @Grey: I got the rarely seen Oh Man Ha on that one

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Yeah, I enjoyed that…

          • nick the dick says:
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            @Grey: hey im confused by the humor here. All these links are doing is sending me to the app. What am i missing?

      • nick the dick says:
        (link)

        @JeF With 1 F: im not sure I follow. Youre just showing me this app?

          • nick the dick says:
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            @Grey: oh im not seeing it. Alrighty then!

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Look at the one below too…

              • nick the dick says:
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                @Grey: same thing, brings me to the play store to install the app is all. Maybe cuz im on my phone idk

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  Hmm, yeah, not sure… That’s likely it, I’m on my ‘puter right now…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      HA! Nice call on the avatar faces…

  16. Ante GALIC says:
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    Grey!

    Gr8 stuff and gr8 banter on the Padres from all. Hopefully it means at least 1 run more for each pitcher (including Kennedy et al) of run support. This will only enhance the chances for success of your ‘only Padres pitchers and only Rockies hitters team’.

    1. It’d be cool if Kennys could morph into two players in the batter’s box at the same time every time he comes up to bat. Right?

    2. My big question is where will the Braves’ pitchers get any run support from? I don’t see any player adds to the Braves’ offense. Are they ‘REALLY’ planning to bring back Chipper Jones?

    3. I used to be a Braves’ fan until they let the the wrong Upton go. This lineup is just the worst – downright offensive!. I’d rate them the worst in MLB.

    4. The Braves should trade FF for Gaby Sanchez and clinch the number 1 pick in the 2016 June draft. Awful team!

    Cheers,
    Ante

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      1. I know, right?! 2. Braves are punting this year for some reason 3. Yeah, it’s awful 4. Yup

      • Ante GALIC says:
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        @Grey: Yeah, like an adult version of the Wonder twins! Sry for the ’76 flashback!

        Cheers,
        Ante

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Ha, nice

  17. Wake Up says:
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    Eovelocity to the Bronx…trying to help Carnac win his fantasy league…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      HA

    • JeF With 1 F says:
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      @Wake Up: Captain Eo in the bronx is not good for him…but good for me, i have a few jackass yankee fans in my Dynasty league who drink the Kool Aid on whoever the yankees get….ill be sure to pick him up and fleece one of them after his first good start

      • nick the dick says:
        (link)

        @Grey: @JeF With 1 F: As much as I was all over the Nasty Nate train for the first half of the year, I think that was a stupid move to trade prado. I don’t get it. I know they need pitching but shit Prado can play everywhere.

        • JeF With 1 F says:
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          @nick the dick: I agree and Nate fell off in the national league…now in the AL east in that stadium…id rather have Prado

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Eovaldi has more upside, Prado is whatever… Maybe he made more sense for the Yanks, but they’re not competing this year, so it’s a decent deal for them…

          • JeF With 1 F says:
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            @Grey: all i saw from this was “They’re not competing this year”

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Ha, yup

          • claw dog says:
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            @Grey: Yea I’m in agreement that it was a good move for the Yanks. Also frees up space for Refsnyder to play 2B. Now the infield besides Tex isn’t very injury prone so we don’t necessarily need prado as a backup at every position, even though it was nice. Jones can be backup for Tex and Beltran, so in my eyes this was a great move. The minor leaguer Domingo German looks like he’s been pretty good in the minors as well. Don’t know why people are freaking out saying this is dumb

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              I think people expect the Yanks to get older not younger so it confuses them…

              • SteveNZ says:
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                @Grey: Jones in Yankee Stadium could be kind of interesting…

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  As a drop and pick up waiver guy? Definitely… Gotta watch when he’s in the lineup, prolly a straight platoon…

                  • SteveNZ says:
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                    @Grey: Yeah. I suppose in a sense he’s no more interesting now than he was before, but I guess he has that park factor thing going for him.

                    You know, that park factor thing that has so far failed (in the face of all the hype to the contrary) to turn any of the Yankee LH hitters into Babe Ruth…

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Haha… Yeah, plus Jones will platoon so he’s hard to hold indefinitely…

                    • Prez says:
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                      @SteveNZ: tuesdays and thursdays are no longer colby rasmus days!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      HA… Was waiting for that! Nice…

    • Wake Up says:
      (link)

      @JeF With 1 F: That one made me laugh!

      • Jef with 1 f says:
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        @Wake Up: I apologize for leaving you out….clearly your moves are worthy of inclusion

        • Sky

          Sky says:
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          Wake has them moves like Jäger

          • Jef with 1 f says:
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            @Sky: ha…I can tell by his lingo he’s got flava

          • Wake Up says:
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            @Sky: Hahaha…I am a master hunter!

  18. KC says:
    (link)

    Hey Grey,

    15 team dynasty league. 6×6 (Standard + OPS and Holds). Would you rather Harvey & Alex Gordon or Votto & Salazar?

    Danke

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Gordon

  19. Wake Up says:
    (link)

    EVOO: I’d say that’s it’s a pretty good move by Cashman. Pretty bad for fantasy dolphins. Very good for the Carnac…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Wake Up: Yeah, I tend agree up until the end… Carnac’s in the league with him so it’s bad for Carnac…

      • Wake Up says:
        (link)

        @Grey: A: No, it’s good for him in a fantasy league since his opponent gets Eovalverde in that park

        Q: I forget how this format works?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          A: Whipped cream
          Q: What A-Rod’s been eating too much off of manly strippers?

          • Wake Up says:
            (link)

            @Grey:
            A: EVOO

            Q: What is ARod rubbing in Nate’s belly button?

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              A: Sony hack
              B: A-Rod swinging outside of Sony studios.

              • Wake Up says:
                (link)

                @Grey:
                A: North Korea
                Q: What will ARod and Kanye name their adopted daughter?

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  A: Kim Jong-un
                  Q: Who was A-Rod’s sex tape with?

  20. de nachos says:
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    This has been approved as a Top Chef spoiler free zone, I may now enter. Show is playing às I write this. Also is anybody watching Banshee? Best cheesy violent show out there, like Tarrantino meets Anime meets Mexican soap opera plus the gratuitous patented Skinamax sex scene.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Never seen it… Good episode, the last one…

    • J-FOH says:
      (link)

      @de nachos: better than Z nation?

  21. de nachos says:
    (link)

    Haven’t seen Z but gotta say yes. Amish mafia, Ukranian crime bosses, hot women, Asian cross dressing techno-geek assassins and a black bartender with a heart of gold named Sugar. It’s good stuff.

    • J-FOH says:
      (link)

      @de nachos: I saw cheesy and went immediately to the syfy channel. It’s got to be one of the cheesiest show I have ever scene. They had a Zombie baby, nado, bear, dog, nuclear, nami…

  22. Pat says:
    (link)

    Hi Grey,
    Quick story. My friend Nick and I, who met you at the San Diego Razzball football draft, went on down to the Tuesday night winter meetings at the Hyatt. I wasn’t expecting much, just wanted to check out the scene. Well, after about 2 minutes in the lobby we saw over a dozen folks that only a baseball nerd could love: Kevin Millar, Ken Rosenthal, Jon Hyman, Matt Williams, Ryan Dumpster, etc. But the real treat was seeing Jim Leyand just hanging out talking to two (stutterer!) other gentlemen. After a moment, Leyland excused himself and went outside. To my great joy, I got to watch the old man sit down on a bench and light up a smoke.

    Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, and happy new year!

    Pat

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      That’s amazing! Dammit, I totally would’ve went down to San Diego if I had known it would be that easy to see wonderful…

    • J-FOH says:
      (link)

      @Pat: That’s awesome, I would of gone and had a smoke with Leyland. How is your league from that tour stop draft?

  23. Kahreem-Mahpants says:
    (link)

    I love all the great info on this site! What do you think will happen with Alex Guerrero now that the Dodgers picked up Kendrick? He seems to have a major league ready bat…but not ear

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Ha, thanks! I think he’s gonna be traded elsewhere or act as a utility man bouncing around the field… Definitely not getting everyday at-bats as I once thought not that long ago…

      • Kahreem-Mahpants says:
        (link)

        @Grey:

        Thanks for the comment – I love the site, happy holidays!

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          You too, nice username, btw…

  24. J-FOH says:
    (link)

    I found that gift guide from Adam Carolla’s days on KROQ, I think it’s from like 97. him as Mr. Birchum

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Ha, awesome, I didn’t remember this at all…

      • J-FOH says:
        (link)

        @Grey: probably because you weren’t living out here yet. Thats when Jimmy Kimmel was the sports guy. This was like 96

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Ah, gotcha

  25. Wake Up says:
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    153!

    • J-FOH says:
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      @Wake Up: 153i

      • Prez says:
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        @J-FOH: that a beamer?

    • Prez says:
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      @Wake Up: 164!!

  26. Wake Up says:
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    (pssst…don’t tell naybody out there……but, I’m a litle tripsy…and just about to start….mmmmmmmmmmmhhhhhhhhhhhuuuuuuuuuuuuaaaaaaaaaaaa)

    • J-FOH says:
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      @Wake Up: pack your pretzels and water

      • Grey

        Grey says:
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        Be safe!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      HA! Enjoy!

    • Prez says:
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      @Wake Up: visit the shaman in the forest?

  27. Prez says:
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    padres move the fences in and make the playoffs. mark it down!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Bandwagoner!

      • Prez says:
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        @Grey: who would have ever thought that one day you would mention banwagoner and padres in the same sentence…

        • Prez says:
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          well, you didnt say it in the same sentence but.. ya know? like you were implying that.. feel me? MAN, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEANT!

          • Grey

            Grey says:
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            I hear ya, brah!

            • Prez says:
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              @Grey: hang ten, grey! *does little pinky, thumb shake thing*

              • Grey

                Grey says:
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                You too, brah!

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Haha, right?

  28. Alex says:
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    Grey, do you like Billy Butler or Adam Lind going forward?

    Thanks

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Butler

  29. Jef with 1 f says:
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    PREZ!!!! What up daawwwwwg…glad to see your alive

    • J-FOH says:
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      @Jef with 1 f: I didn’t realize you two are so close

      • Grey

        Grey says:
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        Everyone loves prezzii!

        • J-FOH says:
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          @Grey: he’s a hater at heart…we know our own

          • Grey

            Grey says:
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            There is only one F in your name too… I wonder if you guys are secretly related…

            • nick the dick says:
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              @Grey: Oh snap! Buuuurn

            • J-FOH says:
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              @Grey: you know I can literally kick your ass. Besides mine is an acronym while his is like how a girl changes it to be different. “I’m Kattie with a yie”

              • Grey

                Grey says:
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                Wow, so mad!

                • J-FOH says:
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                  @Grey: that’s like comparing me to snafu Larry or Quentin *shakes fist*

                  • Grey

                    Grey says:
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                    Ha!

              • Prez says:
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                @J-FOH: im prezi with 2 i’s! heyyy yall!

    • Prez says:
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      @Jef with 1 f: im back baby!! bullet wound free! well, at least this year…

  30. J-FOH says:
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    Is getting the cougs a cane for Christmas going to get me in trouble?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Not if it’s made of sugar-free candy!

      • J-FOH says:
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        @Grey: always sugar free

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Yup, she can’t digest sugar at her age…

          • J-FOH says:
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            @Grey: then I’ll get her a cane to assist her moving around. Rascal for 2015 Christmas?

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              I just bought gifts and what I don’t get… Why do people buy gifts for each other when they have a joint banking account? What a waste…

              • J-FOH says:
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                @Grey: not spending anything from that account is the greatest gift of all.

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  Yeah, too late for that, she already bought me stuff… Eff me…

                  • J-FOH says:
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                    @Grey: stupid gifts, if its not a personal appearance by Giancarlo then its not a gift

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Jumping out of my birthday cake, exactly!

                  • J-FOH says:
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                    @Grey: hint taken

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Hehe

  31. nick the dick says:
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    Prez with the hold me down, hand me my cake, Dusty Bake activate!

    • J-FOH says:
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      @nick the dick: oh we rhyming today?

      • nick the dick says:
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        @J-FOH: All day err day man

        • J-FOH says:
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          @nick the dick:

          man? you are more like a woh-man
          with those flowers in your head
          put your baby ass to bed
          I ain’t hatin’
          just playin’
          excuse while I start blazin’

          • nick the dick says:
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            @J-FOH: Go start blazin’, your shit aint fazin’ me, im hot like they Cajun seasoned me, no bedtime, i’m never sleeping G, like the way you sleep on me, heavily, like Kirstie Alley the fatty actress on a mattress be

            • J-FOH says:
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              @nick the dick: you like the Alley? her thighs are like a valley to the river styx, I’m serving you up like chips…and salsa. I’m the alpha, woof woof can you hear me? woof woof can you hear me? Oh I’m sorry I must be calling your ladies.

              • nick the dick says:
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                @J-FOH: That aint shit, I go to the Styx for vacation, if you thing you top dog you mistaken, cuz when I use the alpha-bet, I bet I’m the alpha male, and you just a bozo with a blowhole spouting out like a whale, you better duck me, cuz man trust me, it’ll get sicker than Sandusky, with boys in the shower sayin touch me, my flow is nasty, you barely yucky

                  • nick the dick says:
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                    @J-FOH: Ha when keeping it real goes wrong

                    • Prez says:
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                      @nick the dick: not really sure why guys are in the shower trying to touch you… but im feelin it!

          • Prez says:
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            OHHHH kill em! bout to get some prescription bottles and fill em! haters are like pickles, i dont dill wit em!

            * drops mic*

            • nick the dick says:
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              @Prez: Aw sookie sookie now! Boys are in the shower touching Sandusky which is sick and nasty, as are my rhymes. *drops soap*

              • Prez says:
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                @nick the dick: HA! the *drops soap* got me… its relevant to the conversation too! you are a great raper…

                no, that wasnt a typo..

                • nick the dick says:
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                  @Prez: I’m Don Draper with the paper

                  • Prez says:
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                    @nick the dick: im al gore with the whores…

                    • nick the dick says:
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                      @Prez: I’m Bill Cosby with a hobby

                    • J-FOH says:
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                      @Prez: I’m Carlton Fisk at a Brisk

                    • Prez says:
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                      nice one, Full oF!!

                  • Prez says:
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                    @nick the dick: ur bill cosby like “please, dont rob me!”

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Ha!

  32. Harry Hardenberg says:
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    first and foremost, grey i owe you an apology, i called you out on your michael brantley love last year, i was wrong.

    secondly,
    i run a h2h league with daily moves, no moves limit, where last year streaming got out of hand. managers were picking up 6+ SP a day to steal all the counting stats.

    any recommendations on the best way to prevent this from happening again? innings limit? moves limit? weekly rosters?

    • nick the dick says:
      (link)

      @Harry Hardenberg: I think weekly moves limit is the best option and set it at 5 so guys can continue to stream a bit but limits stockpiling and makes people less loose with their streaming choices. Puts everyone on the same playing field if they all have the same amount of moves.

    • nick the dick says:
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      @Harry Hardenberg: even 7 moves per week is good so it accounts for moves that need to be made for injured or non-productive position players in addition to streaming

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Sounds like fun, why curb it? Put a moves limit if you must… 7/week…

      • nick the dick says:
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        @Grey: As a rabid streamoholic it does sound fun but unlimited moves in a daily h2h is insanity. I’d drop my whole team everyday

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Yeah, but that could backfire too…

          • nick the dick says:
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            @Grey: True but when theres only a limited amount of guys throwing on any given day to stream, its not really fair that one guy could go grab them all and lock up wins and ks for the week. Personally id love it but its definitely not ideal

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              In theory, it could work like that, not entirely sure it does though… Plus if he’s stockpiling SPs, he can’t stockpile hitters for short days, unless the roasters are also unlimited…

              • Wake Up says:
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                @Grey: Kenny Roger’s Roasters= Always Unlimited!

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  Yeah, know when to hold em, know when to hand feed em to homeless people…

                  • Harry Hardenberg says:
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                    @Grey:

                    the issue was guys would stay up til the rosters set for the next day (3 am) and grab as many as they possibly could (lame)

                    and the thought that the inability of being able to pick up hitters is a negative is a facade.

                    the advantage of picking up a pitcher greatly outweighs the opportunity cost of foregoing a hitter for that day, in my experience in that league.

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
                      (link)

                      Gotcha, yeah, put in move limits per week… I’d go 7…

    • Prez says:
      (link)

      @Harry Hardenberg: we have been doing 4 moves per week for the past couple years in my points league. you have to make ur stream picks very carefully. it sucks when position players get hurt tho. 4 is nice but 5 i feel would be ideal to stop heavy streamers.

  33. Wake Up says:
    (link)

    Ugh…feels like somebody tied a rubber band around my head and I can’t remove it. I am never drinking again!

    Prez…bad news your gerbil died…3 months ago…on the flipside, you now have 100 new pet maggots…

    Jffoh…deep breaths Griz…deep breaths…

    Oh yeah, almost forgot, this one went in to take a shower just as I went to take another shot of Eagle Rare, I then proceeded to go into the bathroom and pee all over her…true story!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      HA! I was waiting for someone to break it to Prez… Damn…

      • Wake Up says:
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        @Grey: The truth and Moses will set you free…

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Well, yeah!

      • Wake Up says:
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        @Grey: Speaking of that…this oil sure is burning slowly…

        • Prez says:
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          @Wake Up: you told me you were a gerbil expert, you bastard!!

          • J-FOH says:
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            @Prez: maybe he was saying girl balls?

            • Prez says:
              (link)

              @J-FOH: ohhhh like brooke? i see..

              • J-FOH says:
                (link)

                @Prez: yes…but don’t see

                • Prez says:
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                  @J-FOH: she ever come around here anymore? id love to sit and talk burgers and best jack off positions with her…

                  • J-FOH says:
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                    @Prez: she…I mean it came by a few times during the season.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          It’s supposed, it’ll be fine…

    • J-FOH says:
      (link)

      @Wake Up: I must have something stuck in my throat

  34. Shaggy says:
    (link)

    Who’s a better crapshoot, Vargas or Jon Singleton? Keeper league.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Vargas

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