You know how when one girl isn’t into you, you date another girl that is a slightly lesser version of the previous girl? With that in mind, as the World Series winds down, Joe Buck will be seen dating Dan Vogelbach. Late night, when no one is around, Joe Buck will still look at pictures of Kyle Schwarber, but Vogelbach is the only one that will call him back. Then you know Dan Vogelbach and Joe Buck are going to get into some huge blow out at the mall that is going to go like this, “You don’t even love me! You love Kyle Schwarber!” Joe Buck will step against a wall, lowering his head, saying, “You’re right. I can’t lie anymore.” Ugh, such heartbreak! So, should we be excited about Schwarber multiplied by 1/2? Mini Schwarber? Kyle Nickelbach? There’s talk Vogelbach can’t play a position, but he’s penciled in as the starting 1st baseman for the Mariners as of right now, so *raspberries lips* to having no position. He’s always done nothing but hit for power in the minors: 23 HRs in Triple-A, while being somewhat of an Adam Dunn donkey-type. Power, no average and a high OBP. He hasn’t yet earned the nickname Ridonkey, but I really want to give that name to someone, so show me something, Kyle Nickelbach! Anyway, what can we expect from Dan Vogelbach for 2017 fantasy baseball?
The following will be assuming at no point during the Mariners’ 2017 season will anyone mention to Vogelbach what the Spanish word for sugar is and he accidentally eats Jesus Sucre. The Mariners 1st base shituation is a mixture of dire and straight garbage so I buy the idea that Vogelbach can get 450+ ABs if he does what he came to do: hit homers. I do think there’s at least a 30% chance that he hits .170 in April and is sent back down by May. There’s risk with all rookies, but maybe a bit more with Kyle Nickelbach. Vogelbach could have a long, Dunn-like career or he could be Jack Cust. Dot dot dot. Cust kayin’. Nickelbach hit .240 in Triple-A with the Mariners and everything the M’s touch turns to meh. He doesn’t strike out all that much, and I’m going to totally disregard his 12 ABs in 2016 when he struck out six times, hitting .083. Of course, if he does it again in 2017, it’s going to be harder to ignore. He looks like he could be a .250 hitter with his line drives and base-to-base approach. As Prospector Ralph said last year, “It feels lazy to compare him to Matt Adams, but he’s a lot like Matt Adams. The potential development of his power upside could spare him that fate. Speaking of fate, I hucking fate Grey!” Hey, c’mon! I agree with PR’s comparison, and the real reason for Nickelbach’s inclusion in the fantasy rookie series is his inside path to 400+ at-bats. For 2017, I’ll give Vogelbach the projections of 52/19/61/.254/1 in 440 ABs.