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Oh how thangs are-a-changin’!  The Brewers have the talk of the town!  The cock of the walk!  No not Brad Peacock, who I got laughed at on the Podcast for begrudgingly dropping in our Perty Perts RCL, I’m talking about the legend himself Eric Thames!  Hey, I gotta derail the NL intro somehow, because the boring ol’ Nationals continue to dominate.  Thanks to Coors Field allowing Trea Turner a cycle and like, a bajillion RBIs!  The AL is much more interesting though, with yet another new front-runner emerging with the Mariners this week.  James Paxton for president!  Wait, he’s Canadian.  Paxton for Canadian president…  I’m running out of steam with the intro!

Here’s how week 4 went down in the 2017 REL League:

REL Dynasty – NL
Nationals 136 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $100 n/a
Cubs 106.5 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $98 n/a
J.T. Marlin 99 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $100 n/a
Cincinnati Reds 99 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $70 Patrick Kivlehan Cin – OF $0, Carlos Estévez Col – RP $0
Pirates 91.5 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $89 Phil Gosselin Pit – 2B,3B $2, Steven Okert SF – RP $2, Joan Gregorio SF – SP NA $0, Joe Blanton Was – RP $0
San Fran Giants 89 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $98 Chris Stratton SF – RP $2, Christian Arroyo SF – SS (called up)
Diamondbacks 86 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $92 n/a
Knoche’s Rockies 85 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $84 Pat Valaika Col – Util $2, Luis García Phi – RP $1
Brewers 79 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $28 n/a
 Eric Thames has put my team on his burly shoulders, and has gained me a ridiculous 25 points since last week.  Hopefully his hamstring isn’t too hurt with all this carrying!

The Brewers bats are on fire!  Even though I’ve traded away a good bit of my regulars to rebuild, the whole offense is humming.  Huge bounce back from Hernan Perez, and the Brewers catchers man!  .384 16 R 5 HR 14 RBI.  That is just unreal, and makes me feel good for overspending a little FAAB to be sure I own them.  I’m still not competing this year, but man it would feel good to finish top-half after losing Junior on opening day and Alex Reyes at the beginning of camp.  It’s really only my pitching holding me back, which has been my goal all year.  I have some premium prospect bats, but need to keep hitting the pavement for some arms.  Archie Bradley looks effing great though, and I don’t mean only physically!  Love his shaved head and beard!  But his velo looks awesome and his curveball looks great again.  With Shelby Miller likely out a longgggg time, they might be ramping up Archie to start again, sooner than later.

What else is going on in this very coherent update…  Jason Heyward looks like he’s back, that’s been more than welcomed.  Andrew Toles is really letting me down man, after posting some huge SB numbers in his weird on-and-off years in the Minors, he’s got none right now.  If I had steals and pitching, I might legit be 100+ points and competing.  But I’ll wait for Victor Robles before I rush out and look for speed.

Got a Brewers off day this afternoon, so this might be my peak in the standings for a little bit.  I’ll always enjoy being ahead of the Cards in the standings, as long as I can have it!

Phightin Phils 75.5 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $62 n/a
NY Dodgers 69.5 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $95 n/a
Mookie Mets 63.5 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $99 Matt Albers Was – RP $0
Cardinals 61.5 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $90 Gorkys Hernández SF – OF $1, Zach Duke StL – RP DL $0
Well, Well, believe it or not the Cardinals are sitting in 13th! Been and interesting week. Carpenter had to take a seat one game for “ump bumpin.” Waino made a turnaround with a 9K game against the Brewers. Leake showed he was a human and allowed more than a run but still got the W. His ERA is all the way up to 1.32! Real life Cardinals bested the hot Brewers in Miller Park by winning 3 of the 4 games. Thanks Brewcrew, needed some wins. Waino and Leake also played offense combining for 1 R and 6 RBI during that series, none of which I put towards my stats.

Speaking of Brewers, Matt Garza was activated of the DL. He made it 4 innings. I think owning Garza is going to be more trouble than I care for but I’m going to try it.

Peralta and Span hit the DL. Oh boy, this is getting tough. I picked up Gorkys again with Span on the shelf and then the Giants promoted everyone from Triple-A. Gorkys might not find much playing time.

With the PPD for yesterdays game the Cardinals have a doubleheader today which should hopefully give me a few extra stats so I can possibly say next week that I’m in 12th. GO CARDS!

Braves 29.5 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $76 n/a
Padres 29.5 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $95 Nick Kingham Pit – SP NA $0, A.J. Cole Was – SP NA $0, Drew Stubbs SF – OF $0
REL Dynasty – AL

Mariners Trade: Ervin Santana (SP), Chih-Wei Hu (SP) to The Tribe for Albert Pujols (1B), Joakim Soria (RP)

Astros Trade: Chase De Jong (SP), Daniel Mengden (SP), Collin McHugh (SP) to Motter Marvels (MIN) for Carlos Beltran (OF)

Devil Rays Trade: Jacob Faria (SP), Jake Bauers (1B), Justin Williams (OF) to Royals for Andrew Triggs (SP), Jacob Barnes (RP), Jose Leclerc (RP)

Mariners 118 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $41 Ryan Goins Tor – 2B,SS $17, Josh Rutledge Bos – 3B $0
I have to applaud the Mariners on their hitting this week even though they can’t get a win in actual baseball. Their hitting did propel me into 1st place this week albeit by the slimmest of margins. Hard to believe a last place team in the standing is leading in the fantasy equivalent….but that’s where we are and I will take it.

I escaped the majority of the pitching damage this week as players I do not own were responsible for the 19 run debacle against the Tigers. Only picked up a single win but collected close to 60 Ks over the last 7 days. The injury bug has hit this week as I lost Haniger and King Felix to the DL and a benching of Seager for a few days to recover from his ailment. Feel I have the bench depth to ride out injuries but hope no more occur. Picked up a couple players off of waivers (Goings and Rutledge) and hope they get some playing time due to injuries their teams. Lastly, Houston PLEASE keep playing Aoki.

The Tribe 117.5 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $73 James Hoyt Hou – RP $15, Taylor Rogers Min – RP $0
Well things are settling in nicely as we close in to the end of the first month of the season. We are currently bouncing back and forth in the top two spots. The bats are producing nicely and the pitching is starting to show some signs of life. Corey Kluber and Carlos Carrasco were great this week and we were able to make a trade for another starting pitcher in Ervin Santana who had a nice start for us as well.

Our trade this week was Albert Pujols and Joakim Soria for Ervin Santana and Chih-Wei Hu. When we finalized the trade the Mariners stated that we won the trade. I like the trade for the needs of my team since we had 3 first basemen Pujols was expendable but Pujols is still an RBI machine and Soria is quietly having a nice start to the season. They will help the Mariners this season. Santana is off to an amazing start and while I hope it continues I just need him to be a solid 3/4 for my team. I worry about my pitching staffs health with Carrasco and Danny Salazar never going a full season and Santana gives me that depth. I traded a lot of pitching prospects last season so it’s nice getting a solid prospect in Hu. I don’t expect much from him this season but I think he could be a nice pick up over the next couple of years. To summarize I do feel like I was able to do what I set out to do which is take my depth at 1st base and RP to add a solid to above starter. Adding the prospect was a nice bonus.

I do see a roster squeeze coming as my team continues to get healthy. I have put players like Mike Fiers, Whit Merrifield, Austin Jackson, and Abraham Almonte on the block. I’m looking to deal them for minor league guys. I am obviously not looking for top level prospects in return. We’ll see if I can get anything.

Go Tribe!

Orange Birds 96 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $66 Tommy Kahnle CWS – RP $27, Nick Martínez Tex – SP,RP $5, Jayson Aquino Bal – RP $0
Time to justify a bid of $27 for Tommy Kahnle (besides the fact that it won). After all the high bids on Jordan Montgomery, I thought that I might have to bid a lot to get any good players that are still out there. When I saw Kahnle was unowned, I knew I needed to get him on my team. He lives in the high 90s, hits 100 when he has to (like when he struck out Sal Perez yesterday in a high leverage situation), and has greatly reduced his walk rate. Going back to last year, he has been dominate (in a short sample) and depending on who the White Sox trade in the bullpen, could be looking at the late innings this year or next. My original bid was $9, but I felt it was too low. Someone else would have to bid on him I thought. I was in a similar situation last year with Matt Bush, but did not win him because I was “saving my FAAB”. Turns out only 2 other teams bid on him for $0 and even though my plan worked, I still feel like an idiot. I mean who spends $5 on Nick Martinez

Besides all the players on the DL, the team is still solid. Will definitely be trying to make more trades going forward.

Tigers 95.5 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $89 Donnie Hart Bal – RP $5, Alec Asher Bal – SP $2, Daniel Wright LAA – SP NA $0
Yankees 95.5 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $91 n/a
Full disclosure, wait is there any other type of disclosure? Anyways, I haven’t had this much fun watching the Yankees since the early Jeter years. You know the years were Jeter played solid defense, wasn’t yet the captain or Mr. November and led us to 6 World Series in 8 seasons. The youth has definitely brought a different attitude and exuberance to my nightly television viewing. And it’s welcomed.

Short week for the Yanks with more off days; five in total and a rainout through the first 18 games makes it tough to keep up with numerical numbers, but it will all even out. It’s just harder to swallow when you drop out of first place because of it.

Two big additions to the team this season that I could of only hoped would be half this good this season. First, Judge continues to hit homers, but I think what excites me the most are two things. One, he’s improved his O-Swing rate from 33.6% last season to 24.7% this season, which means he’s taking more pitches outside of the strike zone. Secondly, he’s shortening his swing when he’s got two strikes in the count. Over the weekend in Pittsburgh, he hit a mammoth 475 foot homer, but I was more excited about the two strike single to right field. I know I sound giddy, but it’s been a long time in the making. Plus the Yankee hype machine is not going to slow down touting him as the next king of the Big Apple anytime soon. Member Joba? Member when he was the next king?

The second obvious surprise is how dominant Severino has been. He looks reborn with confidence and an attitude that he has absolute control out there as he leads the team in Ks and innings pitched. Combine Severino with my other two SPs in Pineda and Tanaka and the bullpen horses of Betances and Chapman and we are fourth in ERA and second in WHIP. (Could be one higher if there was an innings minimum and the Twins weren’t exploiting it by benching an entire staff and pen but I won’t complain. Or am I? Maybe a little. No one even knows).

White Sox 88.5 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $83 Anthony Swarzak CWS – RP $0, Dominic Leone Tor – RP $0
Astros 87.5 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $84 David Hernández LAA – RP $4, Matt Belisle Min – RP $2, Preston Tucker Hou – OF NA $0, Miguel Almonte KC – RP NA $0
Power Rangers 78 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $88 Shane Peterson TB – OF $7, Connor Sadzeck Tex – SP NA $0, Anthony Bass Tex – RP $0, Andrew Faulkner Tex – RP NA $0
Motter Marvels (MIN) 77.5 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $77 John Hicks Det – 1B $18, Danny Santana Min – OF $0, Kaleb Cowart LAA – 2B,3B NA $0, Chris Gimenez Min – C $0, Nick Tepesch Min – SP (called up)
Devil Rays 69.5 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $0 n/a
 It’s been a long few weeks for the Devil Rays squad…  I currently have 9 players that are inactive, between the DL, NA, and suspensions.  I addressed some of my issues by trading for two setup men, along with Triggs, but my need for steals still remains.  I’m desperately looking for steals, and possibly a 2b, if possible.  Send me offers if you have any of those available!  Outside of that, my team hasn’t been performing too bad.  The power is there in bunches, and that’s with an ice cold Encarnacion.  My pitching is also off to a slow start, but I don’t have a reason to think that they won’t come around to some extent.  I highly doubt that Holland will be my ace permanently…  Fortunately, there is a lot of season ahead, and a healthy pitching staff, and a promoted Mallex Smith, could mean great things!
Halos 63.5 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $97 Boog Powell Sea – OF NA $0
Athletics 59.5 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $52 n/a
Blue Jays 59 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $35 n/a
Let’s try to do a positive take for once here as there hasn’t been much of that from the Jays to this point.

I’m looking at my teams pitching so far and what I see is a group that has managed to put up 44 out of a possible 75 points despite injuries and DL stints for my #1 starter, my #2 starter, and my #1 reliever. Only 5 teams are better than those 44 points right now. I’ve also managed to put together the 4th most innings pitched, which in a league this deep can be hugely important.

On the hitting side the Mariners finally had enough of Danny Valencia and his .188 AVG starting every day at first base. So the Sultan of Donuts, Dan Vogelbach, finally (can you say finally in April?) gets the call up. So far so good, as he’s gotten a couple hits and an RBI already. He should get plenty of playing time going forward so I’m hoping for big things here.

On to the farm!

Anthony Alford has looked great so far this year. While he’s cooled down the last few days he’s been putting up multi-hit games and stolen bases left, right, and center. He’s also only struck out once in his last 6 games. The oft-injured catcher Max Pentacost is starting to come around finally. The former 1st round pick has 3 HRs, 8 RBI, and a .368 AVG in his last 5 games. If he can stick at catcher his bat could play very well for fantasy.

Looking a little farther from the bigs we’ve got Vladimir Guerrero Jr who just doesn’t stop. The kid just turned 18 and he’s currently got a 9 game hit streak going which includes 10 runs and 6 RBIs. Overall he’s got more walks than punchouts which is helping with his .996 OPS. Bo Bichette is currently hitting .383 with a .486 OBP and looks like a professional hitter in the making. I wonder where him and Vladi Jr get that from?

As far as non-Jays prospects go, I’m hoping that Tyler O’Neill going 3 for 5 with a HR and a couple runs and RBIs gets him going as he’s struggled for the most part this year. The fact that he’s struck out only once in each of the last 4 games is comforting. Garrett Whitley is a long way off, but he looks like he’s figuring some things out too with a couple games recently where he’s put together big lines.

Red Sox 58.5 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $50 n/a
Royals 36 Waiver Adds and Prospect Callups Past Week:
FAAB Remaining: $92 Yairo Muñoz Oak – 3B NA $0, Brooks Pounders LAA – RP $0
Well, almost one month into the season and my season-long team batting average heading into last night’s games was…drum roll please…, yep, .196! Serious question, at what level of performance does a team lose the right to be called a “fantasy team”. If our wise Founding Fathers of Fantasy Baseball had ever looked into the future at my team, they’d surely have said “NO!!! You totally missed the point dumbass, that’s not at all what we had in mind!” I know batting average is only one category, but kind of an important one. A team can hit .220 and still make some noise in the HR and RBI categories, but not .196, not going to happen…no runs, steals, RBI, or HR’s either when you can’t even hit at the freakin Mendoza line.

More good news from the minor leagues as former top prospect, Kyle Zimmer is hurt again after only 3 games. Shocking news I know, but a workload of 9 total innings this year was apparently a bridge too far for Kyle’s fragile young arm, what a wuss. My only hope now is to trade him off to an unsuspecting owner who might get Kyle confused with his top prospect brother, Bradley Zimmer…hmmmn….nah, would never work in a league like this that’s full of knowledgeable owners, but hey…if I played in Razz 30…

So I’m now buried deep in last place, but I’m not discouraged. To the contrary, instead of making futile attempts to move up a point or two in a few categories, I’ve decided to embrace my last-placedness (if that’s a word) and focus on the future. Made a major deal with the Rays to pick up three of their top prospects, Jake Bauers, Jacob Faria, and Justin Williams. Hey, now I can cleverly name my team “The J’s”…damn, it looks like that name’s already taken in our league, never mind! So I traded away Triggs, Barnes and Leclerc in that deal. Not a huge fan of Triggs long-term, but I did hate trading away the two young relievers. Believe strongly in both of those guys long-term, but in this stage of a massive rebuild, the bullpen is a lower priority right now. This season, huge advantage for the Rays, long-term, who the hell knows, but love the upside of all three guys I received. The future is definitely bright! (maybe?)


  1. nick the smooth dick says:


  2. Alcibiades Escobar says:

    When does the Razz30 article get posted?

  3. nick the smooth dick says:


    Just terrible

  4. Jaaaaaake says:

    Why are they trying to make REL a thing? It’s not a thing. #RAZZ30 is life.

  5. nick the smooth dick says:

    I’m just glad 22 teams decide not to write their totally uninteresting thoughts on their team for this post. Imagine how long this shit would be! Thanks for having 22 teams who don’t care about this weekly post whatsoever or I would still be scrolling.

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:

      @nick the smooth dick: Bash me all you want, but don’t bash my leaguemates! This is a completely voluntary way for readers to contribute to the site, it’s not a requirement, and I’d bet your weekly recap in a similar type post would be even worse.

      • nick the smooth dick says:

        @JB Gilpin: K. More of a length of post jab. I’m a girth man. It’s all about girth baby.

  6. Ralph Lifshitz

    Ralph Lifshitz says:

    Good job! Good effort!

  7. Jaaaaaake says:

    JB, Imma make this easy on you. Let’s have a friendly bet for charity, REL vs. Razz30.

    My Brewers vs. your Brewers. Regular scoring, whoever has the better score at the end of the year between our two teams donates $50 to charity of the other’s choice. How does this sound? We troll from our hearts, and our crabs. What do you say?

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:

      @Jaaaaaake: Hah but I’m rebuilding! I’m gonna be terrible again! I’d like to start competing a little more by next year, but hell, it’s for a good cause, let’s do it every year!

  8. JRod

    JRodingham III says:

    Man *The Tribe* is doing work… I just pulled off this trade for the Indians in #Razz30 and picked up Nova and Melancon from the Pirates… oh wait, you’re AL/NL only so you can’t do that? Sucks to be you. (crab emoji)

  9. Raider says:

    JB, as Razzball’s resident Brewer’s fan what are your most wildly optimistic expectations for Josh Hader this year? 80 innings, good K’s? thoughts?

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:

      @Raider: Man I wanna go bold and say 90-100! But our persistence in giving Garza starts is so frustrating… I actually love that projection, 80 innings, 85 Ks, decent ERA, bad WHIP

  10. Bull in a Chinese Restaurant says:

    i sure hope you aren’t quitting the pitcher profiles from the troll brigade that’s been around lately smearing their shit on the walls. just take the advice from the departed on feeding the feds the mushroom diet, feed em shit and leave em in the dark. i too agree that complicated dynasty leagues being done in yahoo is silly and there’s no sane reason to have real life trades effect leagues like this at all, but if you got 30 people who DO want to do that, let them do it.

    and while i’m sure that wasn’t ralph’s idea to have those 5-7 twats do that, he certainly didn’t attempt to stop them, but tehol’s the asshole, right… and i doubt even he spends as much time of his life going into somebody else’s post to do that kind of garbage as these sacks.

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:

      @Bull in a Chinese Restaurant: Hah nah not at all, it was just something small and trivial in a long line of grievances that had me want to step away. I didn’t want to leave abruptly either, but I’ll plead the 5th from there :)

      Those guys were having fun and clowning, hell Razz is in the name! But real life just was making it all a strain and it wasn’t as fun for me anymore, so decided to sail into the sunset. Appreciate ya dropping by though for the farewell!

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