Until we go over the top 20 closers of the 2009 fantasy baseball season, this is our last closer ranking. Too bad, so sad. For those in very deep leagues, I give you the name Matt Lindstrom. Not so your friends now call you that. No, I give it to you as an example of what can be found in September closers. Teams who fall out of the race (Indians), or teams that can’t afford to lose a lot of games (Phils) sometimes flip the script in September. With the Indians, for instance, they may realize watching Wood be meh isn’t as exciting as giving the ball to a potential closer of the future (Chris Perez). Now during the daily roundups and Buy/Sells, I’m sure I’ll mention closers to watch, but keep in mind guys that don’t have the job, but may get the audition. Anyway, here’s all of the closers for your fantasy baseball team, as of right now:
You know that restaurant your girlfriend/wife/what-have-you likes to go to that charges, like, $12 for a salad? Please, blog, may I have some more?
Chad Qualls is probably done for the season. The closer shituation isn’t going to be pretty in Arizona, unfortunately. We’re looking at a closerousel. I’d list the candidates in this order: Juan Gutierrez, Clay Zavada, Esmerling Vasquez, Daniel Schlereth and Blaine Boyer. Reading those names again, I vomited into a trash bin and the ghost of Hoyt Wilhelm materialized and said in a British accent, “Be careful, Grey. Gutierrez is iffy at best and Zavada can’t see past his mustache when he pitches from the stretch.” Because times are lean for saves in a few of my leagues, I’ll cop to grabbing the first two guys. Careful about going with any of them if you don’t need saves. But really, who doesn’t need saves? Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Krispie Young – In America, everyone gets a 2nd chance — John Travolta, Michael Vick and the police officer from The Village People. Maybe people get 2nd chances in Kathmandu. I don’t know. I’ve never heard anyone say, “Everyone gets a 2nd chance in Kathmandu.” Krispie returns to the majors and should be play nearly every day. What can we expect? Nothing. How’s that optimism? But what can he do? Well, he’s been hot in his recent Triple-A stint and he had a decent 2nd half last year. Absolute ceiling of expectations would be 4 homers and 4 steals in September. It’s not going to save your team, but it could help. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Before we get into today’s Buy/Sell, I want to clear something up. Last week someone commented that my Buy/Sell post only had Buy guys in it for very deep leagues. This is sorta true. With only a little over a month left of the season, just about every league’s trade deadline has past. So I could tell you to buy Manny Ramirez, but how are you going to do that? I do believe in the last month of the season, there’s something else you should be doing. Or actually not doing. You should no longer be waiting around for production. Jermaine Dye‘s put up fine stats this year. You guys going to get a room in October and talk about his great May? If Rajai Davis is on your waivers and you need steals and don’t need power, forget Dye’s previous production and go for the here and now. You’re up against the clock, fantasy baseballers (<–my Mom’s term). You only have so much time to make this shizz happen. If it’s going to happen. This is more or less for one year leagues. In keepers, you need to be prudent about who you can drop. Oh, and bee-tee-dubya, Jermaine Dye was dropped to fifth in the order and has one homer in the past month while batting .187. Cut the umbilical, doode. You guys are done. Anyway, here’s some more players to buy or sell for this week in fantasy baseball:
Jack Cust – Wait, I know a better title for this post, “How To Bore The Crap Out Of Your Readers With Boring Ass Names?” Random italicized voice, you seem like you have a bit of a chip on your shoulders. No, not at all. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Nyjer Morgan was back in the lineup to steal two bases in the first inning, then he left with a broken hand. Bunt, go feet first and get back in there! One of my ‘pert teams was pulling too far away in power, so last week I made a trade for steals and saves. Two categories I usually just play the waiver wire for, but in a 16 team league, it’s slim pickins. I traded Prince Fielder for Heath Bell and Nyjer Morgan. Stab me in my eye! Shove hot coals in my pants! Hot poker my heart! I still won’t miss Prince, but Nyjer’s broken hand… Well, I’d like to write on Nyjer’s cast, “Amputate,” as you should be doing with him on your teams. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Tim Hudson – He’ll be returning on Monday to face the Marlins. The good news, he gets a decent 2 start week next week. The bad news, he wasn’t exactly lights out in rehab. The moderate news, he’s worth a flier in 12 team leagues where you need an extra starter. Just don’t expect him to be anything more than 5 IP, 3 ER. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Before I cover Adam Lind (with words, not a blanket), I want to clear something up about these Thursday keeper posts. I like Lind, but between him and, say, Hanley, it’s no contest. I’m talking about potentially marginal keepers here. Not slam dunks. I could see some people worrying that Lind may not be able to repeat his 2009 season. Contraire, Robespierre. Adam Lind took a while to get going in the majors, but he’s always had this pedigree. In five seasons of the minors, he had a .380 OBP and a .318 average. In his fist full season of the majors where he’s actually seemed to be comfortable, he’s headed for a 30/95/.300 season. Next year, he’ll be 27 and should be able to take a slight step forward. Think 35/110/.310. Also, he’s been batting third a lot recently. If he can get off to a hot start next year like he did this year, he could cement his place in the three hole for the better part of the season, which will help his counting stats. Have You Lost Your Flippin’ Mind predictions for 2010: 100/35/120/.310. No steals, which is a shame, and no great shakes on his eligibility, but those numbers aren’t far off from 2nd round-type numbers. (BTW, you’re reading a fantasy baseball site that alludes to Linda Ronstadt. Don’t you feel dirty?) Anyway, here’s some more fantasy baseball keepers for 2010:
Aaron Hill – Do I smell a theme? Please, blog, may I have some more?
Evan Longoria went 0-for-4 yesterday. He’s been kinda terrible for about three months now. Man, third base is a minefield. Now I’m not putting Longoria in the Wright Sucks Then Gets Conked On The Head box. No, he hasn’t been nearly that bad. But two separate months of an under .240 average and two months of zero steals and tw0 months of 1 steal and this sentence has nearly as many ands as, “In the saying, “Fish-and-Chips,” it’s necessary to have a hyphen between “fish” and “and,” and “and” and “chips.” I’m not ready to proclaim where Longoria should be drafted next year. I’m Grey and I make proclamations! Please, blog, may I have some more?
Here is my claim to fame – Caleb Thielbar. He lived kitty-corner to my house and we played basketball together in high school (which he hated, but was recruited to play division one in college). Either way, he was a two star athlete in Minnesota and went to South Dakota State University for four years and was drafted by the Brewers this summer in the 19th round. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Eric Young, Jr. was in the September call up post, but it turns out he’s a preemie by a week. Young has so many steals in the minors he’s worth a pickup in every league. How many steals, you ask. Well, I was getting there if you give me a second. In the last four years of the minors, he has 87, 73, 46 and 58 steals, respectively. Or disrespectfully, holy effin hey, are you kidding me? In my never-ending rotation of schmohawks (thanks Beltran!), I dropped Alcides Escobar for Young in one league and chucked Drew Stubbs for him in another. Will Young play every day? Seems doubtful. He has been playing in the outfield for at least a few days and will occasionally spell Barmes — B-A-R-M-E-S. I think he’ll see four to five days a week, but for those needing steals, you know the drill. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Johan Santana – Done for the season. This, and his lackluster (for him) season, might actually help Johan come at a discount in 2010 drafts. I wouldn’t reach for him because I don’t believe in drafting pitchers early, but I could see him falling into the 5th or 6th rounds of early drafts. The reason why I specify early is because once Johan looks good in spring training, he’ll bump up a round or two. Then if Johan looks terrible in March, you’ll want to trade him for Nick Markakis. Oh, and your fly’s open. Don’t ask me how I know. Please, blog, may I have some more?
September 1st may mean autumn is around the corner for meteorologists, but you’re not Sam Champion, are you? No, of course you’re not. He’s handsome. For us in the fantasy baseball trenches, September 1st means rosters expand and rookies are called up. Unlike the September hitter call ups we went over yesterday, I’d use kid gloves with these call ups. As Paula Dean might say, pitchers can hurt you, ya’ll. If you need to take a flier on a rookie pitcher, tread carefully, young Razzball reader. Anyway, here’s some potential September call ups to keep your eye on for fantasy baseball, the pitchers:
Aaron Poreda – I’m crazy for HodgePadres, what can I say? Actually, I just said it. But even I’d be careful with Poreda. In NL-Only leagues, yes, please. Elsewhere, maybe home matchups. Please, blog, may I have some more?
The Mets infirmary added a new member yesterday with Johan Santana complaining of elbow soreness. M-E-S-S… Mess, Mess, Mess… I can’t remember another team that has been this Kotchman-bitten. Now pitching for the New York Mets… Angel Pagan. He will also lead-off. I don’t think in spring training when the Mets promised no September collapse they anticipated a June collapse. Johan Santana may need surgery. Or maybe he can return. If you were the Mets, would you press your luck and hope for no whammy? I mean this is more common sense than ‘pert sense. Don’t do anything drastic until we hear more, but, as with anything Mets related this season, plan for the worse. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Jeff Francoeur – Ligament tear in his thumb. Frenchy’s toast? This free swinger says to ball gag that thought. Francoeur thinks he can continue to play. It may be financially motivated… Oh, who are we kidding? No one owns him. Please, blog, may I have some more?