If Pirates played fantasy baseball, their league wouldn’t be all that different than the Razz30. There would be a fearless leader, as debonair as he is handsome. Let’s call him Captain Ralph Lifshitz, you know, just for Lifshitz and giggles. He would of course need a quality first mate, a tricked out pirate ship, and an army of ruthless heathens ready to snap at a moment’s notice. Our Jolly Roger, the Crab Army logo, would fly proudly above our vessel, as we sailed from port to port pillaging all we see. We are the Crab Army, fantasy baseball’s largest and most fearsome battalion of bandits. A consortium of like minded trolls, pranksters, and freaks from the fringes of society. Our reputation for ruthless commentary is only rivaled by the cleanliness of our gooches. With our sponsor Fresh Balls in tow, we press on through another month of top notch dynasty baseball action, and debauchery. May was a wild month, as The Army moved in on unclaimed territory, and took it for their own. We partied it up with Cowboy Cheerleaders, compared real and fake Topanga’s, and talked coffee. It’s the monthly update for the bad boys of Razzball. It’s the Razz30 Update. Two Claws way Up for my peoples.

Please, blog, may I have some more?