Have you heard of the RazzSlam? Rhetorical question. Of course you’ve heard of the RazzSlam. It’s only the biggest thing to happen to fantasy baseball since Grey Albright interviewed Jose Canseco. Which was not only the greatest interview in the history of fantasy sports, but arguably the greatest interview in the history of the multiverse. As for the RazzSlam, there’s no shame in being the #2 fantasy baseball event in history.

Before I signed up for the RazzSlam, girls didn’t want to be near me and guys didn’t want to be me. Then I signed up for the RazzSlam—the sign-up is at the bottom of this page if you’re impatient—and everything changed. I was suddenly knee deep in chicks. Like Frank Thomas after he started taking Nugenix. Anyway, for those few poor souls who are just now discovering the RazzSlam, here’s what you’ll want to know:

Please, blog, may I have some more?