DraftKings – Another Win Means Stepping Up From A Roadkill Dinner

August 14, 2013 | DraftKings | 14 Comments

Two top ten finishes in a row! You gotta stop letting me doubling up Razzball Nation! Now I can leave the roadkill rest in peace and afford to make SPAM or canned sardines gravy on my big biscuits. SPAM is pretty much good on everything, right?

We’re back with another RAZZBALL EXCLUSIVE CAN YOU BEAT RUDY GAMBLE contest, getting you one step closer to the $100,000 Sweet Spot for a shot at a $20,000 top prize – which is like, two million cans of SPAM. Tickets to the Sweet Spot are $100 otherwise, so you’re winning a huge value if you can can the Razzball players. First time I’ve ever said “can can” without meaning the dance, which according to Wikipedia is “physically demanding.” After years of malnutrition and roadkill dinners, I guess it’s “can’t can’t” for me… It’s the usual game, $5.00 an entry, up to two per person, and you can only get in through our exclusive link. Spots 2-10 double up, and get you enough money to start eating healthier…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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See all of today’s starting lineups

#	MLB Starting Lineups For Fri 8/15
	ARI \| ATH \| ATL \| BAL \| BOS \| CHC \| CHW \| CLE \| COL \| DET \| HOU \| KC \| LAA \| MIA \| MIL \| MIN \| NYM \| NYY \| PHI \| PIT \| SD \| SEA \| SF \| STL \| TB \| TEX \| TOR \| WSH \| CIN \| LAD \| OAK

You Get The MSG? Choice Chen Peking Late

August 14, 2013 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 635 Comments

by: Grey

WHO ARE YOU BRUCE CHEN?! I demand answers immediately. I know, yesterday was just against the Marlins, so we can write off the 7 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 6 Ks game. But when I put into my supercomputer (that has a mustache too) that Chen has a 1.62 ERA in 72 1/3 IP, my supercomputer walks out the door…And it doesn’t even have legs! If you woke from a season-long coma and saw Chen’s ERA, you’re liable to have a sudden case of Toxic Shock Syndrome (I might be confusing diseases here). So, can the Chen man keep wokking and rolling like he’s Martin Yan? No way in this giant-lush-covered-in-water-thanks-to-Al-Gore planet. He’s not a sub-2 ERA pitcher. He’s barely a 4-ERA pitcher. As a sabermetrician altered license plate in New Hampshire reads, Regress or Die. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The Razzball Podcast — The One Where Spencer Witte Stops By

August 13, 2013 | All Podcasts | 332 Comments

by: Grey

Oh, him! Yeah, you’ve never heard of him. That’s okay, we have and you should. Spencer is co-founder and CEO of Classic Baseball, LLC whose business is pitcher injuries. That’s right; they know what you wish your local GM knew when he signed that kid with the funky delivery to the bajillion dollar contract. They basically watch a ton of tape and look for mechanical flaws. Kinda like how JayWrong watches a ton of porn and looks for mechanical flaws. Or how Tony Gwynn watches a ton of Food Network shows. Spencer consults directly with six major league teams about which pitchers will get injured. His success rate is above, say, Verducci and his eponymous nonsense. I’m going to try and get Spencer on again before next season to see if we can’t get some insider information about which pitchers are trouble areas for injuries, but right now Spencer is promoting a real-time baseball app that you use to try to predict outcomes of the game when you’re in the ballpark. For instance, you’re in San Francisco and Lincecum’s on the mound, so you predict he’s going to get out of the inning in three batters and take four bong hits between innings (bong hits may or may not be included in the game). Watch out, Candy Crush! The real question is, with all these talents, can Spencer write blog posts? I’m serious. Everybody’s fired. Me included. In other podcast news, I’m on talking about Jason Heyward, Chris Davis, Yu Darvish, Jose Fernandez and Matt Harvey. All the sexy names you know and love, plus Heyward. Heyward can go *bleep* bleep* bleep* in his *bleeping* *bleep*. Anyway, here’s the Razzball podcast (now with some doode who went to Oxford — la di da!):

Please, blog, may I have some more?

RCL Update: August 13

August 13, 2013 | Our Leagues | 18 Comments

by: VinWins

A Hill O’ Beans is back on top after a couple of weeks in 4th place, nudging MasterofGrond down to second. They hit .311 and scored an RCL-best 60 runs, and also had an ERA under 3. There are still many teams in contention with seven weeks to go, so it should be a fun stretch run.

Check out the Master Standings (you can also access them via the Leagues menu up top) to see where your team ranks in comparison to the other 767 teams through Sunday. The page now includes sortable stats.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Pirates Helped Lambo Make The Leap

August 13, 2013 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 248 Comments

by: Grey

Yesterday, the Pirates called up the Frozen Tundra, Andrew Lambo. The Pirates should trade Lambo to Milwaukee (Green Bay) for Yovani Gallardo (arrr!). Or give Andrew a whistle and call him Coach Lambo-ardi. If you’re confused by any of this, you’re not alone. Rudy came up with the title and then spent twenty minutes on IM explaining it’s football stuff and most people would get it. Only a real man rocks a mustache and knows what a ronde jambe is but not a Lambeau leap. (If football is your bag, there’s our fantasy football section of hazarai.) Lambo’s worth discussing because he has big time power — 31 homers in the minors this year. Lambo mercy, you’re so power thirsty. He used to be a top prospect in the Dodgers’ farm system, but was suspended in 2010 due to taking hits from the bong, then never really got started in 2011. His playing time with the Pirates is debatable at this point — he’ll play; no, he won’t, yes, he will, less filling! At worst, the Pirates should play him against all righties. He’s 25 years old, so his upside is limited, but he could be like a Ryan Ludwick-type. I’d definitely take the flyer in just about any league where you need power, and especially in deep-ish keeper leagues. Wouldn’t surprise me at all to see him pull a Han Solo and cement himself into the lineup. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Pitcher Profile: Martin Perez Dispenses of Astros Like A Pez Dispenser

August 12, 2013 | 2013 Fantasy Baseball Draft | 30 Comments

by: JB Gilpin

Razzball Nation!

The Pitcher Profile corner is back after an off-week of profiling. If you listen to the Razzball Baseball Contest, I was indeed in Oklahoma but it was the exact opposite of Nick’s rendition. I think Nick is just mad at my Canadian bashing. Here is how I would describe his normal weekend:

It’s icy today. Fishing?

Pail. Cut hole.

Wait.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Melvin Upton: Back and Running

August 12, 2013 | Uncategorized | 9 Comments

by: Mike

B.J. Upton is having one hell of a bad year and he recently hit bottom with an adductor injury that sidelined him through the All Star Break. There were some whispers during the first half of the season that the Braves were going to send him down to figure things out, but it never happened. The injury may have been a blessing in disguise, though. Maybe it gave him the time and the means to work on issues that he otherwise wouldn’t have gotten to if he had stayed healthy. His ownership dropped to around 40% at one point, but it’s recently surged back up due to a handful of multi -hit efforts since his return and 3 steals. For our purposes here, the steals are what I want to focus on. There’s good news and bad news here. The bad news is that the three stolen bases since his return came against the Phillies and Nationals, two of the worst teams in baseball at controlling the running game. So, before we get too excited and decide that BJ is going to rattle off 20 steals over the last 6 weeks of the season, just keep that in mind. Ready for the good news? He gets the Phillies and Nationals again this week! I wouldn’t be surprised to see him swipe a couple more with those match-ups. Here are some other speedsters I think might help your stolen base numbers this week:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The King Offs Beers

August 12, 2013 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 637 Comments

by: Grey

Felix Hernandez is the pitcher to pitcher when you’re facing more than one Brewer. *sips from frosty mug* Ah…. Almost as satisfying as a good porgasm, which is the ecstasy reached when you finally find a rest stop after you have to pee for about two hundred miles. Yesterday, F-Her threw eight shutout innings with 9 Ks, lowering his ERA to 2.28. He’s not even close to how good he was his Cy Young year. He’s MUCH better (caps for emphasis, not so the guy who’s reading over your shoulder can see better). He has a career high strikeout rate, which is like, “Hey, this Filet Mignon can’t get any better– Oh, wait, I don’t have to pay for it either?” And it’s not because you cut out a chunk of your hair and put it on the plate. F-Her also has a career low walk rate and a career low xFIP, which tells us his ERA isn’t even fluky. He’ll probably be overshadowed by Yu Darvish or Max Scherzer in the offseason, but F-Her is finally coming into his own at the ripe young age of 27. In 2014, when people are going Kershaw and Darvish and Wainwright, there F-Her will be again coming at a discount because of some perceived weakness due to win potential. Bunch of Murray Chasses (Chassi?), every one of you. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Jam it or Cram it: Smoak on the Roster

August 11, 2013 | Fantasy Baseball Buy/Sell, Sleepers | 78 Comments

by: The Guru

The 2013 Fantasy Baseball season is heading into its stretch run and the playoffs are right around the corner. My fair Razzballers, it seems like only yesterday we were complimenting Grey’s mustache and singing voice in exchange for roster autopsies, trade advice and grooming tips. We were all so young and naïve with big dreams for Ike Davis and Josh Rutledge back then. Now we are just bitter old men (and four ladies), wondering where it all went wrong and yelling at those kids to get off our lawn. If you’re still in the fantasy hunt *high five/chest bump/headbutt* it’s time to drop any dead weight still rotting on your roster. If you are out of it and still waiting for Josh Hamilton to carry your team, Sky would love to hear from you over on Fantasy Football Island. For the rest of us, we are either trying to hold onto first, grabbing some stats to gain on the leader or getting in position for the playoffs. There is no hope and loyalty left at this point in the season. It’s time to drop the duds and find the studs that may carry you to a fantasy championship. It’s time to jam it or cram it.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Creeper of the Week: The Incredible Tenable Venable

August 11, 2013 | Creeper of the Week | 10 Comments

by: Mike

Your regular Creeper columnist, Sky, is taking the week off as things start to heat up over on the football side of things here at Razzball. I know, I miss him too. Turn that frown upside down, though, because I’ve got a nice Creeper for you this week in Will Venable. When I went to write this post, I looked for four things: nice matchup(s), a player who is widely available, somebody who’s actually hitting right now, and a player who can contribute in multiple categories for your fantasy team. Venable fits the bill this week. He’s always been the poor man’s power/speed combo player, but he’s frustrating to own long term due to a crowded San Diego outfield cutting into his playing time and an inability to really hit for average. Even so, I think he’s a good bet this week for some power and speed. As an added bonus, he’s one of a handful of players that wasn’t accused of taking PED’s by Jack Clark…so there’s that.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Fantasy Razzball Update: August 11

August 11, 2013 | 2013 Fantasy Baseball Draft, Our Leagues | 2 Comments

by: VinWins

Fantasy Razzball is the game where the goal is to manage the worst fantasy baseball team possible. You hope to find terrible players who don’t get sent to the minors.

As in the RCL, a team’s points are multiplied by the League Competitive Index. The LCI is based on the total points of the top 8 teams per league. The overall standings can be found below. Points are credited as follows:

Hitters (AB = +2, H = -3, R = -4, HR = -6, RBI = -4, K = +2)

Pitchers (IP = -1, HR = +4, L = +8, K = -1, ER = +1.5, H+BB = +1).

You can find links to the six Fantasy Razzball leagues (along with the 64 RCLs) here.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Minor Accomplishments: Week 19

August 11, 2013 | Fantasy Baseball Prospects | 62 Comments

by: Scott Evans

The White Sox traded Jake Peavy to the Red Sox not long ago — perhaps you remember it. The three-team swap sent Peavy to Boston, Jose Iglesias to Detroit, and a handful of lower levels prospects to Chicago. It also sent 22-year-old outfielder, Avisail Garcia, to the Southsiders. In the aftermath of the trade, I rushed to add Garcia wherever I could, working under the assumption that Alex Rios would also be moved before the trade deadline, which would create an immediate opportunity for Avisail. Well, it took about ten days longer than I anticipated, but Rios is now playing for Texas, and Garcia is now a regular in Chicago. If you’ve been paying attention to my ramblings, you already know that I’m a big fan of Avisail. He has the tools to help across the board in the fantasy game, and high-impact potential in HR, AVG, and RBI categories. Garcia is still a little raw, and his approach needs some refinement, but I’m thrilled to see him finally getting an opportunity to play everyday in the bigs. If you’re in need of outfield help, I absolutely endorse adding him in mixed formats.

Please, blog, may I have some more?