While I would love for you top just give me all your money and draft your daily team over at DraftKings, I can not in good faith just take your money with out giving you a free pen like the deaf people at the airport or mall cafeteria. So last week was my first shot at learning you good people some of my picks for Saturdays games, I did ok. I am not going to go back and see because I am like Magellan or De Soto and have the expression ever forward. We here at Razzball provide you with all the tools necessary like the Hitter-Tron and Stream-O-Nator that you will need to construct your team. We unfortunately don’t offer common sense or crocheting tips however so you are unfortunately out of luck. Over at DraftKings they have games for all comers; size, smell, and upright walking status are not discriminated against. You got the loot, they have the league. So check out their Sweet Spot contest, along with a cavalcade of other emotion daily roller coaster that the have to offer. Good luck on the days games.
Jose Quintana ($9,700) – The Texas Rangers pitching is awful when Darvish isn’t on the mound. He isn’t so a great 2nd P option here. Colby Lewis looks about as hittable as the beer league softball pitcher that usually has a nicknamed like Sully or Butchy.
Edwin Encarnacion ($4,200) E5 heats up can’t cool down, you got me spinning round and round. Abracadabra, not just a code word when you are in trouble with Sampson either. When do you see a top 15 ranked player pre-season this cheap, I’ll tell ya when. Never. Apache, jump on it.
Omar Infante ($3,800) – Great career numbers for the human Whip machine known as King Kong Correia to the tune of 6 hits in 17 AB’s. Fun fact neither about Infante or Correia, Kathy Lee Gifford used to be the singer for name that tune. You’r welcome, now tell the world you learned something useless yet groundbreaking today.
Hunter Pence ($4,400) – There is a trend that I use when making out my roster for DK. History, and these small squirrel bones that I keep in a Yahtzee cup. I spill them out on my driftwood table with 11 candles burning and the bones speak to me. It’s either them or the Rice Krispies. Career wise he rides Stults like he is a brand new Bugatti. 3 HR, 9 RBI’s and OPS’ing 1.039 in 26 Plate appearances.
Matt Garza ($9,400) – He is pitching against the Wandwagon, I really shouldn’t need to say much more than that but I like throwing stats at ya so you will listen to everything I have to say. 36 K’s in 28 career innings in 3 starts vs. the Pirates. On the year has been a little unlucky in the win department, things change my friends.
Trevor Plouffe ($4,000) Plouffe goes the dynamite all over the Panamanian’s face, here some twin city love in your eye there Bruce. 3 taters in 25 Ab’s and an OPS of 1.235. I don’t speak french but Rosetta stone here I come.
Ryan Braun ($5,700) – When I say he owns Wandy Rodriguez I mean that he literal owns everything about him. Wandy’s dog is named Braun that’s how far it stretches. In 54 career AB’s he has 4 Hr 11RBI and is OPS’ing 1.271. Start with Braun for the night games and go chincy someplace else.
I’m Only Happy When it Rains
It’s looking like a beautiful Spring day for day drinking. Nothing looks in danger of weather threats, but stranger things have happened.
Doing Lines In Vegas
I’ll take for the day:
Braves -135
Over on the Milwaukee/Pirates O/U 7.5
Over in the slugfest in Beantown Boston/Bal O/U 9
And a cheeky Prop bet on Ervin Santana at plus 6 K’s against the Mets for $100
