by: Grey
I asked ChatGPT this great philosophical question, “If mom says don’t play ball in the house, and when she said it she was in the Brady House, and Brady House plays ball, is he making mom mad?” ChatGPT didn’t say anything in return, but smoke rose from its robot ears and started sputtering. I defeated […]
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by: Grey
In the year 1225, there was a 700-foot statue of Max Muncy in what is now commonly referred to as Lithuania. The town’s name was Muncy and the statue was named Max. For 800 years, the people of Muncy chipped away at this Max statue. Each rock they chipped off this statue, they named a […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Here’s what I wrote in November of last year, “Went back and searched my posts for every mention of the word “sleeper” until the All-Star Break. So, if I said, “(player’s name) was going to be a 2025 fantasy baseball sleeper,” I made note of it with a slash. By the time I was done, […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Hey, Tone, it’s your nephew Christopher. The city’s a mess. I went in there and they charge congestion pricing now. Can you imagine this? Charging me to sit in freakin’ traffic. How about Satriale’s charges to stand in line for gabagool? Paulie said you don’t have to pay the congestion pricing if they don’t see […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Bubba Chandler is ready. When the Pirates will call him up is your guess = my guess. Jac Cannoli is ready and the Royals could use hitting, but where is he going to play? I don’t know. Roman Anthony is ready, but he’s more “Where is he going to play” than Cannoli. At least Jac […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
“So, this is one of those restaurants where I buy an empty plate for $18 and I tell you what I want on it, and I can choose anything from this list? Sweet! Okay, first I want a corner man. Then I want ribbies. Better put some pickles on it. I do like ranch, ya […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
There’s plenty more “exciting” names to talk about in this opening than Josh H. Smith. There’s plenty more exciting names to talk about without the scare quotes. Sometimes, we have to be mature adults when we’re playing fantasy baseball and eat our vegetables (vegetables we don’t enjoy, such as Brussels sprouts, and not good vegetables […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Roman Anthony is objectively a cool name. Perfection, no notes. Not like Nick Kurtz. No offense to his hitting, but, if I were to critique that, I’d say it’s too close to Dick Hurtz. It should’ve been Dick Kurtz to clearly nod at the groin allusion or they should’ve went with, like, Jerry Kurtz. Jerrish […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Explain baseball to an alien? Can we start with this: What if all those Bubbas were in the majors at the same time? Would you be worried? How would it make you feel? Would you think, “Am I baseball fan or,” considered pause, as you turn to the mirror and continue, “A Bubba watcher?” I […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Martha, I hope this letter finds you well. I’m stationed in SacTown. Currently, I’m sweating and having a fight with myself in a mirror when I receive a telegram from a young Harrison Ford. I have to get Kurtz out of the jungle. No, not Vietnam, I said SacTown. That is literally this city’s name. […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
I hold a few blades a grass up, then toss them to test the wind. They just sorta fall to the ground and I’m not sure what that tells me. People in the stands are confused why I’m testing the wind to hit a baseball. I don’t know myself, to be honest. I step into […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
When the Netherlands landed on the ABC islands in the Caribbean, the Dutch made three requirements of all people, when farting in bed, pin the sheet tightly to the bed surface to not let any smell emit; all restaurant checks must be split in half with all attending parties, and, finally, all names must have […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?