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Ayo whaddup it’s ya boy Grey Albright aka the Fantasy Master Lothario aka The Guy Who Eats Takis Every Day aka The Guy Who Cool Sculpted The Fat Off His Stomach After Eating Takis Every Day aka The Guy Who Started A ZZ Top Cover Band Named The Gay Beards And Had To Explain To Everyone I Meant Gay As In Happy And Beards As In Beards aka The Guy In Starbucks Asking For The Bathroom Code While Carrying His Entire Wardrobe aka The Guy Who Goes Oop All The Time aka The Guy Still Vaping aka The Guy Standing Behind You aka The Guy Wondering Why Lumberjacks And Lesbians Both Wear Flannel aka The Guy In Charge Of Moseying At Your Local Frontiertown aka The Guy Typing This With His Pinkie Toe. I’m here with 2020 content, snitches! Okay, I need to sit down, I’ve exhausted myself in the excitement of it all. Well, the joke’s on my butt, I have nowhere to sit! A quick preamble about the 2020 fantasy baseball rookie series that is coming from me over the next few weeks. Rookies could get a post if they meet MLB eligibility requirements, less than 130 ABs or 50 IP. That means no Bo Bichette, no Aristides Aquino, no Kyle Tucker (just missed at 131 ABs), and no Trent Grisham. In 2012, the first player I highlighted was Mike Trout. That wasn’t an accident. I said in the Mike Trout post, “He’s ranked number one for me. Numero uno. The Big Mahoff. He’s the big Statue of Liberty in New York, not that girly one in Paris!” Since then, I’ve attempted to make the first rookie post about a prospect that will be the top rookie for fantasy the following year. Last year that honor went to Vlad Jr. Yes, it’s an honor, don’t be so condescending. The year before it was Ronald Acuña Jr. This year the top fantasy prospect isn’t no ordinary man, this is the prospect I be seeing in my sleep. Luis Robert will be your number one 2020 fantasy baseball rookie. Will Lou Bob be named to the All-Century Team in 80 years or edged out by a robot with grabby hands named the Hitter-Tron that my great-great-nephew will sue, due to trademark infringement, only to find out it’s the same Hitter-Tron that once graced this little fantasy baseball blog called Razzball? Can Lou Bob be a top 50 overall player in 2020? Will Luis Robert even get enough at-bats? Let’s stop the questions and start the answers! Okay, one more question… Anyway, what we can expect of Luis Robert for 2020 fantasy baseball?

On Prospector Itch’s top 25 prospects for 2020 fantasy baseball (not clickbait at all!), Luis Robert Wuhl ranked 2nd overall behind Wander Franco, who seems assured of spending almost all of the 2020 season in the minors, so if you were wondering why no Wander — Wandering? — that’s why. On the other hand, we got Louie Bobby. RIP Cougs’s grandma who died of that. Or was that Lewy Body? Okay, moving on! Last year in the minors, Robert went 44/16/39/.297/7 in 202 ABs, and, as we know by now, Triple-A is harder than the majors. I kid, a little. To me, the majors are number one and Triple-A is 1A. Like many hitters nowadays (I say nowadays like I’m super old!), the ball rockets off of Robert’s bat. Here’s one of the sexier clips I found, his 1st Triple-A hit (leave the sound on for one of the more hilarious home run calls; how do you even confuse him for…that?!):

He kinda looks like Eloy in that clip. However, Eloy has the speed of a large man in a chair with wheels going uphill. Luis Robert (great name, by the way) can swipe 20+ bags. The strikeouts and lack of walks might hinder him a little, in at least the average department.  Not for nothing, the mannequins in the average department are a real bore. So, solid power, great speed, bleh average and I want him on all of my 2020 fantasy baseball teams. Can I get a giddy and an up? The last question after that last question is how early do we see him? The Paler Shade of Sox might just be my early pick to make the 2020 World Series. They are built for now and Luis Robert is 100% ready to go. I don’t see many rookies being up on Opening Day, because MLB is damaged and there’s no incentive for teams to win with their best team on the field, but remember Eloy started the year with the White Sox, and I could see the same for Luis Bobby Ricky and Mike, I like Luis Robert who cares who you like. For 2020, I’ll give Luis Robert the projections of 78/22/59/.248/24 in 514 ABs with a chance for more.