The last hurrah, it’s been a long, strange trip. Insert your own cliché. The last week of fake baseball is here and if you’re still fighting for a championship, now is not the time to get cute. Because it will cost you. Play who is hot, that’s the best advice I can give, guys are getting shut down left and right. Take all your allegiances to high draft picks swallow your pride and start guys who generally wouldn’t be playing. For pitching, however, the last week is kinda sketchy, as I wouldn’t trust too many 2 start guys that are going this week, so I’ll give you the abridged version of who I would go with. It’s been a great year and I hope that I have helped or, if you’re in a league with me, hurt your chances at winning. For the last time in 2010, here are the 2 start pitchers for fantasy baseball that will be semi useful, good luck.
Dallas Braden (@Ana vs. Haren) (@Sea vs. Hernandez)
He can’t wait for the season to be over so he can go on the professional bridge tour with his grandma. He is a guy who will get more love than he is worth next year. Sneaky good ERA, not enough Ks. 1-2 on the year vs. ANA, 1-1 vs. Sea.
Carlos Carrasco (Det vs. Galarraga) (@ChW vs. Jackson)
Hasn’t allowed more than 3 ER in any start. Quickly rising up the ‘Shhh Chart’ for next year. ERA at home is halved, only 2 starts though. Great makeup of pitches and will only be 24 next year. Sounds good to me, where does that line start for next year?
Tim Stauffer (ChC vs. Zambrano) @SF vs. Cain)
Any SD pitcher looks awesome right now. They are in pennant race and all pitch to miniscule numbers. Only 3 start sample but has allowed 5 ER in 17 innings. Will steal you 5K’s a start. Game vs. SF may be a all hands on deck affair for the Fathers so keep that in mind.
Brad Bergesen (@TB vs. Davis) (Det vs. Galarraga)
I was high on him in March. Took about 6 months to figure it out. Last 5 starts 3-1 1.54 ERA, holy hell. That includes 2 starts versus the Sawx and one versus the Yanks. No K’s, will get slapped around hit-wise.
Nick Blackburn (@KC vs. O’Sullivan) (Tor vs. Rzepczynski)
Sounds like an Air force pilot or a spokesman for skin cream. Anywho, .213 BAA, 1.81 ERA since late-August. Minny is coasting into the playoffs. Side note is Morneau taking forever to come back from a concussion or what?
Alex Sanabia (@Atl vs. Minor) (Pit vs. Morton)
On here as my favorite ‘crappy pitcher good matchup’ for this week. ATL is mailing it in ala St. Louis, and well Pitt is Pitt. 2.59 ERA last 3 starts. Caveat: 2 bad defeats against ATL.
So far in this month of September, Troy Tulowitzki has 11 homers and 27 RBIs. This is Hungrybear9562 owning Tulo in a H2H league this month — It’s a DOUBLE HOME RUN! All the way across the sky! OH. MY. GOD. A double home run. Wait, is this a triple home run? No, it’s a double home run. It’s beautiful. *cries* The only thing ever holding Tulo back is health. If Tulo can stay healthy for an entire year… Well, look at his 2009 stats — 32 homers, 20 steals and a .297 average. Next year, he’ll only be 26-years-old and hitters tend not to peak until the age of 27. Yum with a double shot of gimme. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Eric Young Jr. – 2-for-4, still got love for him and am still willing to go to PTA meetings for Eric Young Jr. Jr., but it’s worth noting that he now has three errors in the last two games. Barmes may see more time in the 2nd half of games as a defensive replacement.
Jorge de la Rosa – 7 1/3 IP, 5 ER, 7 baserunners, 7 Ks and his line looked even better before he left two men on for Beimel to let score. He gets the Diamondbacks next and I’d start him there sans hesitation. Or sansitation, for those that enjoy a good portmanteau.
Adrian Gonzalez – 3-for-4, 5 RBIs and 2 homers. Now hit ten more homers before the end of the season and we’ll be cool.
Chris Young – Will start on Saturday vs. the Cards in The Lou. Would like this start better if it was in Petco. Young had a 7.82 ERA in Away games last year and 5.27 in 2008. Both years his home ERA was below 3. Unless you’re desperate, I’d let him pitch from my bench. Remember though, if he’s on your bench, don’t sit anyone short behind him.
Carlos Zambrano – 6 IP, 1 ER, 7 baserunners, 3 Ks. I’m not a huge fan of Big Z, but he hasn’t thrown a bad start since he returned to the rotation on August 9th. Really should be owned in every league.
J.A. Happ – 4 1/3 IP, 5 ER, 9 baserunners, 5 Ks. He obviously wasn’t a sub-3 ERA pitcher. His luck was bound to run out in the landmark case of Sooner vs. Later.
Brandon Lyon – Well, the closer role in Houston got murkier yesterday. Lyon gave up a run and blew the save then Lindstrom came into the 10th and gave up two runs. Houston, we have a shituation.
Rickie Weeks – 2-for-5 with his 27th homer. Weeks has more RBI than Fielder and more homers than Braun. If I’d known that going into the year, I’d have put my life savings on the Brewers not making the playoffs.
Brian Duensing – 6 IP, 2 ER, 10 baserunners, 4 Ks. He was in last week’s borderline starters and next week’s is coming this afternoon. How’s dem apples? Delicious!
Kyle Drabek – 6 IP, 3 ER, 12 baserunners, 5 Ks. I would’ve loved to watch him, but my Direct TV cut out during the pregame (which is not pronounced like edamame). So going on the box score, looks like Drabek wasn’t fooling anyone. He’s young, doesn’t change how I feel about him for keepers or next year. To gaze at my Kyle Drabek fantasy, go there.
Brad Bergesen – 9 IP, 1 ER, 7 baserunners, 3 Ks. Even a broken clock is right a few times a season.
Jered Weaver – 7 IP, 0 ER, 1 baserunner, 7 Ks. More incredibly, he actually got run support. A’la Vicki Lawrence as Mama, “Well, I’ll be!”
Russell Branyan – 1-for-3 with his 25th homer. All he does is hit home runs! No, really, that’s all he does.
Homer Bailey – Left the game with dizziness after allowing 3 earned runs and 5 walks. Hey, maybe Oliver Perez is dizzy.
Drew Stubbs – 2-for-3 with his 18th homer. You may want to put away sharp objects when you read this next line. According to ESPN’s Player Rater, Stubbs has been as valuable as Matt Kemp.
Jason Bay – Said he’s feeling great and free of any post-concussion symptoms, but he’s still not coming back this year. Canadians — Bay and Morneau — had a bad year for concussions. What’s it called when a Canadian misses extended time from work? A maple leaf of absence. *sad trombone*
Jenrry Mejia – Left yesterday’s game with a strain in his shoulder. Likely shutdown for the year. No word if the injury happened when he was trying to roll the R’s in his first name.
Wilson Betemit – 2-for-3, 4 RBIs and his 2nd straight game with a homer. Yes, you should pick him up. Yes, now.
Mike Minor – 5 IP, 4 ER, 5 baserunners, 6 Ks. Really was just a victim of an ill-timed grand slam to Maxwell, who is one sexy piece of chocolate… Wait, wrong Maxwell. I’m still going to like Minor next year. I know, up the down staircase, Sandy Dennis, but that’s how rookies do.
Phil Hughes – 6 2/3 IP, 4 ER, 6 baserunners, 5 Ks. I’ve been saying this for about a month now. You can do better than Hughes off waivers. Duensing, for instance. He’s been better.
James Shields – 6 1/3 IP, 1 ER, 10 baserunners, 8 Ks vs. the Yankees. I was about to write how no one got sonavabenched because no one owns him but then I looked and saw he’s owned in 93% of leagues. Are you people crazy? He has a 1.41 WHIP and 4.86 ERA after this solid start. Even after this start, I’d drop him.
Dan Johnson – 2-for-3 with 2 homers. The Pride of Coon Rapids! (BTW, there was discussion in Minnesota about changing the name of this city. Some felt it was derogatory. I think it’s too vague. Change it to Coon Rabids.)
Emilio Bonifacio – 2-for-5 as he continued his hot hitting. Own players when they are hot. That’s my mottofacio.
Gaby Sanchez – 2-for-4 with his 18th homer. Not doing a whole lot, but now has two homers in the week, i.e., two more than Prince Fielder.
Brad Lidge – 1/3 IP, 1 ER. Kazaam, as he generated a save for Jose Contreras. Manuel changes his underwear more than he changes closers and that’s not a whole lot.
Raul Ibanez – 3-for-5, 2 Runs and 2 RBIs. Hitting well over his last ten games and worth riding while hot.
Gavin Floyd – 5 1/3 IP, 6 ER, 11 baserunners, 4 Ks. After the game, he tweeted, “I pitched. #sucky”
Chris Sale – 2/3 IP, 1 ER. Of course down 6 runs Ozzie pitches the guy who he just said was his closer. Of course he does! Why wouldn’t he? I will now don a potato sack and walk into traffic.
Jaime Garcia – Early yesterday, the Cards announced that Garcia would be shutdown for the year. Later in the day, the Cards announced he would be skipped one turn and be reevaluated. Much later in the day, I wrote this. Today, you’re reading it. Tomorrow is Friday. Yay!
Ryan Franklin – Heading home to deal with some personal issues. I know what it meant when a girl in high school would go home with ‘personal issues,’ so I’m guessing Franklin has cramps and/or is pregnant.
There are two weird trends going on this year. The amount of 1-0 games and the desperate creepiness of Carl “Purple Pie Man” Pavano’s mustache. Both completely weird me out in different ways. Fantasy wise 1-0 games suck, unless you are like me and like to dry hump starting pitching. The Pavano situation is awful. He reminds me of a guy with an endless supply of candy, that drives to the game in a van with an airbrushed wolf howling at the moon under the tinted windows. Just plain creepy. We are oozing to the playoffs with about 4 weeks to go. Now is a better time than never to make every attempt to go 7-3 rather than 5-5. So buck up and start streaming like you own it. Worse case scenario you get “smushed.” Have a look-see at the least likely owned 2 start options for this week of fantasy baseball.
Daniel Hudson (Cin vs. Arroyo) (Col vs. Francis)
His picture may be going in my locker soon. Shows great stuff, I just hope he doesn’t do too well, I don’t want to overpay next year. ERA in the mid 3’s, 6K’s/start. Run to pick him up… Stop, tie your shoe first.
Brad Bergesen (Sea vs. Fister) (Tex vs. Lee)
Huh, a complete game. What the Buck? It actually was a nice game pitched for all 55 people in attendance. Don’t get too excited, he is now done getting complete games for the decade.
Mike Minor (Was vs. Olsen) (ChC vs. Wells)
Future number 3 in the ATL. Decent four pitches, changeup is a plus pitch, seems to short arm it a little. BAA comparable to Jeremy Sowers. Yeah, I just cancelled my subscription.
Kevin Correia (@ ChC vs. Gorzellany) (@Mil vs. Narveson)
You’re going to say, “Smokey, two road starts for a Padre?” My rebuttal is, they have to show some moxy. They are in a playoff hunt. Check the numbers, he isn’t that great at home either.
Chris Volstad (@Pit vs. McDonald) (Hou vs. Rodriguez)
Is only as good as the Marlins offense. He is 6-8, maybe he rides the pine for the Heat and gets a ring. Half of his wins against the Nats. Which isn’t really helpful info for this week. Previous bad outing vs. the Pie Rats.
Dallas Braden (Tor vs. Morrow) (TB vs. Garza)
2 complete games in last 3. ERA half run better at the home. Morrow may have shot his load, expect a disaster.
Kevin Millwood (Sea vs. French) (Tex vs. Hunter)
Yeah, he is really bad, but Baltimore is hot. Still, far from a safe bet in either game.
Jon Niese (@ Hou vs. Happ) (@Pit vs McDonald)
Fry Pan is pitching well just no run support/bullpen. The Mess are atrocious. He is going to be a good buy low guy with an innings warning next year.
Bronson Arroyo (@ Ari vs. Hudson) (Col vs. Francis)
Still under a 4 ERA for the year with 12 sneaky wins for the contending club. Still hate the pitching motion, looks like a ballerina wearing stirrups.
Francisco Rodriguez was arrested for assaulting his father-in-law. That’s going to make for awkward holidays. Or maybe they’ll skip Christmas and celebrate Boxing Day. Fred Wilpon needs to put some rubber bands in his beard and get K-Rod and Tony “Shirtless” Bernazard into the squared circle. During the fight, Johan was seen comforting K-Rod’s wife. Johan, “She was looking for the changeup, and I went with the heater.” K-Rod will probably miss a few games while he responds to attorney emails. Oddly enough, K-Rod isn’t the easiest guy to handcuff. His backups in no particular order: Bobby Parnell, who I believe is the little black kid from Role Models, isn’t very good, Manny Acosta isn’t much better, Elmer Dessens is the guy who sells fresh corn on the side of the road when you’re driving through a rural town and Pedro Feliciano is related to Pedro Feliz, I think. Frankly, I’d avoid the whole Mets mess. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Miguel Montero – Was a part of a back-to-back-to-back-to-back homer job with Adam LaRoche, Mini Donkey and Stephen Drew as they did work on Bush. Hey, Googlers of back-to-back + Bush. Betcha this isn’t the kind of fantasy site you were looking for, was it? And for those that found us by Googling Donkey + Bush –> I’m kinda skeeved.
Daniel Hudson – 7 IP, 2 ER, 8 baserunners, 9 Ks. I picked him up when he was traded into the NL with the expectation that I’d only own him for one start, but I haven’t seen one red flag yet.
Pat Burrell – 2-for-4 with his 2nd homer in ten games as he bats .357 this month. It’s Pat the Bat and he’s swinging, ladies.
Andres Torres – 2-for-3 with two steals and has 4 steals in the last week. He stops hitting homers; he starts stealing bases. What’s not to love?
Cliff Lee – 6 1/3 IP, 4 ER, 8 baserunners, 11 Ks. The Adverb now has 137 Ks and 9 BBs on the year. Incredible Lee.
Brandon Lyon – 1 1/3 IP, 5 ER. Why is God punishing me? Was it the cat I kicked in college? I was on shrooms and Mr. Wigglenose said, “Freakin’ furball,” but I thought I heard, “I’m a free kickball.” After the cat landed, we laughed about the confusion. Mr. Wigglenose forgave me, why want you?! Why?!
Matt Lindstrom – Will be out for a few days with a sore back, which could turn into a longer absence. Well, maybe Lyon’s not so bad. Oh my God, I have a sickness for vulture saves.
Mike Stanton – 5-for-5, 2 Runs, 4 RBIs and his 11th homer. Next year, you’re not going to be able to get anywhere near Stanton for a reasonable price so enjoy him now while you can.
Logan Morrison – 3-for-4 with 3 Runs. Hitting .283 and zero homers in his first two weeks in the majors. It’s okay; there’s time. Power will come and, unlike Stanton, the average will be fine.
Ian Desmond – 2-for-5 with 2 homers. Now has 9 homers and 12 steals on the year. He’s going to end the year around 12 homers and 15 steals and suck me right back in again next year.
Ryan Raburn – 2-for-4 with his 2nd homer this week. Ryan Raburn is soooo valuable– Wait, that’s Gene Raburn. Raburn’s playing every day, has pop and he should have 2nd base eligibility in your league. If he doesn’t, fire your commissioner.
Tommy Hanson – 7 IP, 0 ER, 4 baserunners, 4 Ks vs. the Wandwagon (7 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 9 Ks) as it was Throwback To 2009 Day at The Juice Box. Hanson hasn’t had a terrible game since June, so it might be a little late for this, but hopefully Hanson drops a few turds the rest of the way so he’s undervalued in 2011 drafts. Could Hanson be better than Lincecum in 2011? Discuss amongst yourselves.
Jerry Hairston Jr. – 2-for-4 and his 3rd homer in the last four games. These guys don’t stay hot forever, but he’s hot right now. Hairston was also my pickup for today’s short schedule.
Chris Denorfia – 2-for-3 with a steal. Now batting .455 over the last week. Another guy that could go cold any day now, but is hot right now.
Jhoulys Chacin – Potential to start on August 20th, depending on how well Esmil Rogers looks in his next start. Esmil Rogers said, “Holy chicken mole, this is a lot of pressure.”
Carlos Quentin – 2-for-2 with a homer in his 2nd straight game. Please stay hot and avoid injury. That is all.
Brad Bergesen – 9 IP, 1 ER, 4 baserunners, 4 Ks vs. the Indians. He strikes out less than 4 batters per 9 innings and he’s on a terrible team in a bad division. In the offseason, Bergesen was hurt while filming a commercial. See, he’s not good at pitching, in every sense of the word.
Brian Roberts – 3-for-4 with his 2nd homer in the last three games. May be a surprising contributor for your H2H playoffs.
Adam Wainwright – 7 IP, 0 ER, 2 baserunners, 4 Ks. Right now, his line is 17-6/1.99/0.97/158. Spectacular, even if Larry King and I both want to call him, Adam Wainwright III.
Colby Rasmus – 2-for-5 with a grand slam. He’s more or less taken a dump since I put him in my Sell column about two months, but Colby’s a Survivor. I’m going to be pushing hard to own Colby next year, but will have to see where he’s going to be drafted. Right now, I’d say he’ll be drafted as a 3rd outfielder, but with a hot finish or a crazy Spring Training he could get drafted as a 2nd outfielder and become a bit too expensive. Though a 30/15 year in 2011 doesn’t seem too far of a stretch.
Chris Carter – 0 for his first 9 in the bigs. It’s tempting to say screw it and drop him, but I’d give him a week in redraft leagues.
Jon Niese – 7 IP, 1 ER, 5 baserunners, 7 Ks. I thought he was hitting a wall, but now I think he might’ve just been showing a blip on the radar. Definitely worth owning again.
Jered Weaver – 8 IP, 1 ER, 8 baserunners, 11 Ks to extend his major league lead in Ks to 182 (in only 163 IP). All of this while resembling the female gym teacher in your high school.
Clay Buchholz – 8 IP, 0 ER, 7 baserunners, 4 Ks, a 2.49 ERA and a Cainian ERA to xFIP difference.
Bill Hall – 3-for-5, 4 RBIs with 2 homers. Guess how many homers he has on the year. Go ahead, I’ll wait. *taps finger, scratches head, swigs from a bottle of Night Train* 15 homers! What? Is that only insane to me?
Mike Lowell – 3-for-4, a day after hitting a homer. He’s in a good position to succeed for about a month if his body holds up.
Ross Gload – To the DL with a right groin strain. Until Howard returns, the area around 1st base will be Sweeney *pinkie to mouth* sod.
Chad Billingsley – 6 IP, 2 ER, 8 baserunners, 3 Ks vs. Roy Oswalt who went 7 IP, 0 ER, 7 baserunners, 5 Ks as I got the dreaded double sonavabench!
Matt Kemp – Didn’t start again in one of the easiest parks to hit in. Does Torre think he’s Steve Kemp? Did Kemp make fun of Torre for picking his nose? Does Torre keep playing Gibbons as an homage to Jane Goodall?
We have reached the quarter pole of the fantasy season. We had our first manager ousting this week in K.C. The two biggest disappointments, team-wise have to be Seattle and Arizona. As we come up to week 7, it is the first week of interleague play, and the first week where all 30 teams play 7 games. Which is fantasy streaming gold in my eyes. It’s not really gold because if it were I would be wearing a miner’s hat and a UTEP t-shirt. Interleague play is a tough call to make for fantasy pitchers, they have to pretend to hit and the NL has the weakest DH guys. Well, let’s get into it; the week 7 fantasy baseball two start guys:
Brad Bergesen (KC vs. Davies) ( @ Was vs. Hernandez)
I was in on him preseason as a sleeper; he disappointed. 5 ER in last 3 starts, doesn’t K very many, which makes him especially unattractive. Gets 2 decent matchups as KC just isn’t very good and the Nats can swing the bats well every other day. O’s playing a lil’ better after dismal start. Good gamble in deep leagues.
Derek Holland (LAA vs. Kazmir) (CHC vs. Wells)
Everyone’s darling pickup of the week didn’t disappoint. Pitched a gem on Wed vs. Oak. Team scores a ton of runs and hitting against Kazmir can’t hurt. Easily could win both starts this week, though one is going to be an ERA bloater. Good K promise as some of his change of pace stuff is nasty.
Kris Medlen (NYM vs. Santana) (@ PIT vs. Duke)
Gets a couple more tries since Jair is still limping. Has shown flashes of breakout. 20/3 K/BB rate is awesome. Great latter week matchup. Could be a Holland type add after this week for most people. I like him for both starts. Good for a win and 10 K’s.
Chris Volstad (ARI vs. Jackson) (@CHW vs. Garcia)
Two great matchups for the big guy this week. Ed-Jax is looking like how he was back in Tampa’s bullpen 3 years ago and Garcia is on his last gasp. Volstad needs to stop walking people as he becomes a completely different pitcher when his rhythm is offset by the BB. Not a big K guy, should walk away from this week with positive add status in mixed leagues.
John Ely (Hou vs. Rodriguez) (Det vs. Porcello)
The guy invented the cotton gin and has decided to play baseball now, awesome. Pitched great last 2 starts, 17/3 K/BB rate is stellar for a rookie. Gets matchups against 2 pitchers who are in similar boats fantasy-wise, (not a very sturdy one at that). I am tempering expectations as he is due to implode and Detroit is murdering the ball offensively.
Clayton Richard (SF vs. Cain) (@ Sea vs. Rowland-Smith)
Has pitched just as good as Latos without the breakout game to put him on the map. Gets a home cooked start vs. the Giants which is good, gets a bad hitting team in Seattle which is better. Good for a win, 10 K’s and an ERA around 3.50 for the week. I’d take that all day.
Jamie Moyer (Pit vs. Duke) (Bos vs. Beckett)
Is just plain old school, wears the uniform like it, doesn’t use batting gloves. Has a “hit if you can” fastball and potent offense behind him. Not going to give you a lot of swing and misses, he could sneakily win 15. With an ERA in the mid 4’s, that’s pretty decent.
Jeremy Bonderman (Chw vs. Danks) (@LAD vs. Kuroda)
Minus one bad start (8ER in 4in), he has been effective. Isn’t who he used to be or who we thought he would be. Doesn’t have the K-rate of old and will walk his share. Has dual RP/SP eligibility, good for a gamble this week in a pinch if you believe in strength in numbers.
Gio Gonzalez (Sea vs. Rowland-Smith) (SF vs. Cain)
Every week he comes up in the questions as a must start for everyone. I don’t get it personally. He is way too hittable for my liking, throws about 100 pitches through 5 innings and, yeah, he gets you 6 K’s a game with a WHIP in the 1.40 range. Has a good first matchup that will prove everything I just said to be a farce.
