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I’d like to dedicate this opening paragraph to one of our 2008 faves Mark ‘Mini-Donkey’ Reynolds as he reached 200 Ks and is poised to shatter the previous record of 205 Ks set by the very same Mark Reynolds last year.  (Luckily, he’s also shattering his record for Runs, HRs, RBIs, and SBs too.)  We are tempted to call up MLB to ask how much it would cost to sponsor a Razzball Windmill of the Year Award.  It’s got to be hard to fail that much and still have the overall success that Reynolds is having this year.  It’s like that guy in the bar who comes onto 10 girls out of his league and then scores with the 11th.  You have to be impressed with his triumph but the 10 failures are, in their own way, more impressive.  Anyway, kudos to the Grand Diamondhack and onto the rest of what’s going on…

Derek Lowe - D-Lowe forfeited a favorable start tonight when he left after two innings (and 3 ER) with a blister on his ring finger.  Luckily the blister isn’t on his little finger or his thumb or he’d really be in dire straits.

Gavin Floyd – He saw D-Lowe’s 2 inning start and saw him one inning better before leaving with a bad hip.  A 4th inning might’ve qualified him for a Win…..if you used the Joba Rules.  Decent chance he’s toast for the season so don’t waver to waiver.

Hideki Matsui - Hit his 25th HR of the season as part of a Yankee win.  I would’ve thought Matsui would’ve needed to move back to one of those glorified Little League stadiums they have in Japan to ever clear 25 HR again.  Luckily the Yanks built one instead.

Ian Stewart - Returned after missing most of the last week with a bad back to hit a 2-run HR.  He’s now 7-for-30 in September with 5 HRs and 14 Ks.  He’d be a 50 HR threat if they ever triple the size of the ball or the bat barrel.

Jonny Gomes - Hit his 20th HR of the season in 254 ABs.  Incidentally, that’s 2 more than Jay Bruce, 18 more than Chris Dickerson, and 19 more than Willy Taveras.   Hitters moving from the AL to the NL must feel like that kid whose birthday fell a day after the Little League cutoff and got to play an extra year.

Francisco Rodriguez & Brian Fuentes – The former and current Angel closers continue to bedevil fantasy owners with blown saves last night – adding to their already 5.00+ ERAs in the second half.  Like a bunch of Latin Lidges.  If they are still available in your league, lock in their backups – Kevin Jepsen for the Angels and…um…uh…never mind on the Mets.

Franklin Morales – Closing the circle of blown saves, the interim closer of Fuentes’ former employer gave up 3 ER in the final inning of a 4-0 game.  Kazaam!

Roy Oswalt – Being shut down for the season due to lingering back issues.  Half price sale on Astros.com for “Roy & Wandy then starve our chances of winning like Ghandi” T-Shirts!

Braden Looper - Improved his record to 13-6 for the Brew Crew despite a near 5.00 ERA.  Manny Parra is 10-10 with a 6.42 ERA.  Parra is obviously just about 1 1/2 earned runs per game from being a dominant pitcher.

Bartolo ColonCleansed from the ChiSox roster today.  If I was Vince McMahon, I’d sign him and Sidney Ponson as a tag team christened as the Piñatas.

41 Responses

  1. Frank Rizzo says:
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    I’m not sure I understand. Yahoo didn’t charge me anything for Morales’ Kazaam. Just an “INF”.

  2. Nate Marcum says:
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    Grey,

    I am trying to decide if I want to spot start Wade Davis today vs. the Orioles…H2H semifinal game and I am close in both era and whip, but need to keep the gap in K’s reasonable and could use a W….That is if the Rays decide winning is more fun than losing…

  3. dodgers dog says:
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    espn has him down for 1 ER

    good one on the dire straits pun, took me a second. we got to install microwave ovens, custom kitchen deliveeeerayayayas. that video was awful. they made up for it with “walk of life”

  4. Tony says:
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    Razzball Windmill of the Year Award, lol

    I can build you one. I think I mentioned my site before:

    claytrophies.com

    I’m an art teacher, you name it i can build it out of clay.

    TY

  5. Mr. Rickey says:
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    Bad pitching is chipping away at my once commanding lead in the final weeks. Replace Oswalt with Pedro, DLR, Arroyo, Zito or none of the above?

  6. VanHammersly says:
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    Mr. Gamble in the house! It’s pretty amazing how great a fill-in Jorge de la Rosa has been for Peavy this season. I’m somehow in 1st right now in my RCL after losing Beltran and Peavy, my 2nd and 3rd rounders, and replacing them with a revolving cast of crappy outfielders and de la Rosa. From June 1 on, the dude has made 20 starts and has received a decision in all but 2 of them. Here, Grey would likely say something humorous about Randy Wolf calling and wanting his Wins back.

  7. Nathan says:
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    Okay, fun game. Let’s travel back to April 2009. Find the nearest Red Sox fan and tell him “On September 16, Paul Byrd will start at Fenway against the Angels, after having sat out most of the season. The Sox will be missing their regular 3 and 4 hitters, and will be down 3-0 after 5 innings. Then your backup shortstop, your injurred shortstop, and your shortstop from 2005 will bat consecutively in the 9th inning and the Sox will win. Oh, and your starting shortstop plays for St. Louis.”

  8. Nathan says:
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    @Mr. Rickey: Arroyo! Every time he starts I think to myself, “Is *this* the start that his incredible run will end?” But it never does. His ERA since the AS break has to be under 2.

  9. @Frank Rizzo: INF basically means he had an INFinity ERA and WHIP because he didn’t make an out. You can also pretend it means Infidel or Infestation.

    @Mr. Rickey: I like Pedro or DLR

    @Tony: Let us think about it. If it was cheap enough, it might just be fun to send them out in the hopes one of the winners ever talks about it.

    @VanHammersly: What up, VH. Yeah, I know we dabbled with DLR on at least one team but we had Rockiephobia and didn’t hang on. After the years he, Ubaldo, and Marquis put up, Rockiephobia might be dead. (And, yeah, I’m still bitter about Randy Wolf having only 11 wins – he really should be at 15-16 given he’s on a 1st place team).

    @Nathan: They’d say “Yahr frigin’ nahts!” Coincidentally, Nomar pulled a muscle while sitting on the couch and watching the rally.

  10. mr baseball says:
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    Roy Harvey Oswald just assassinated our fantasy teams by being shut down

  11. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @mr baseball: I think he assassinated more by pitching.

  12. mr baseball says:
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    I am waiting for the word when the Yankees will be shuting down – Sergio Mitre

  13. Nathan says:
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    Would you pick up AJ Burnett against the Mariners tomorrow? On the one hand, he’s been utterly craptastic for a few weeks. On the other hand, the Yankees are unfairly hot and it’s the Mariners.

  14. Simply Fred

    Simply Fred says:
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    The Rudy Wagon rolls again! His Greyness has been pulling a pretty heavy cart. Will we see more of you two stallions pulling together?

  15. Nathan says:
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    Ok, so I went with Burnett, dropping an excess batter. Now I have Burnett (vs. Sea), Buchholz (vs. Bal), and Sanchez (vs. LAD) going on Friday. Would Duensing (Det) or Padilla (SF) or maybe Tim Stauffer (Pit) be better than any of the three I already have? My goal is ERA.

  16. Simply Fred

    Simply Fred says:
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    @mr baseball: Best line of the morning. From your lips to God’s ears.

  17. Simply Fred

    Simply Fred says:
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    @Nathan: Burnett has an ERA over 6 each of the last two months. Can’t be good for your goal. Padilla gave up 0 earned through 6 at SF on Sep 12.

  18. Simply Fred

    Simply Fred says:
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    @Nathan: Duensing with a 1.39 ERA in recent 4 as starter. Detroit not that heavy a hitting team. He faces Verlander, but if win isn’t a must, wouldn’t he better better than Sanchez (tough to project, hot recently but did give up 5 earned to LA earlier)?

  19. Simply Fred

    Simply Fred says:
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    @Nathan: Edit: Sanchez gave up 4 earned in 4.1 to LA on Sep 12 (the same game that Padilla was giving up 0 in 6).

  20. @Simply Fred: Ha. I’m just an occasional contributor. Grey is still the master.

  21. Simply Fred

    Simply Fred says:
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    @Rudy Gamble: No, question regarding the master. Still, we love you and want as much as we can get.

  22. Simply Fred

    Simply Fred says:
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    @Nathan: RE: Burnett vs Seattle. Yes, he could wake up against the light hitting Mariners. However, just as likely that he will get burn-ed by the Big Fragu going deep twice with men on against such soft pitching.

  23. kwak says:
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    H2H semis, all pitching categories close. I’ve got two potential spot starts available for the weekend, do I grab

    Joba @ Mariners
    Carmona @ A’s (ewwwww)
    Tejeda @ White Sox
    Stauffer @ Pirates
    Sean West @ Reds
    Davies @ Tigers

    Thoughts?

  24. Tony says:
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    @Rudy Gamble: LOL, i can do a small one, don’t look at the prices, if you get my humor, i’d do it for the fun of it…. let me know.

    moneywise i’d almost do it for cost and shipping just for the hay of it….

  25. Adam says:
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    Pick two starts to take me to my maximum for the week…Edwin vs KC (Greinke), Sanchez @ LAD (Padilla), Bills vs SF (Penny) or Penny @ LAD (Bills)? I’m currently up by a small amount, if that matters

  26. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @kwak: Tejeda, West…

    @Adam: Sanchez, Penny…

  27. Nathan says:
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    @Simply Fred: I agree completely. The problem is that because of Gallardo and Pineiro this week, I’m down big in ERA (the H2H tie-break catagory), and now have to swing for the fences. A bunch of 5IP 2 ER outings aren’t going to be good enough, unfortunately.

  28. Nathan says:
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    Curious what you think, Grey. Pick 3 of Burnett, Buchholz, Sanchez, Padilla, Duensing, Stauffer, Smoltz for tomorrow. Emphasis on trying to lower ERA in a hurry.

  29. Adam says:
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    @Grey: Thanks…would you put Padilla vs SF, Hammel @ AZ, Ohlendorf vs SD or Smoltz vs CHC above either of them? Those are the schmohawks on the waiver wire

  30. Simply Fred

    Simply Fred says:
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    @Nathan: Am curious about Grey’s advice as well. Just trying to help. Still, don’t see how Burnett’s 7.67 ERA in less than 6 IP per game over his last 5 starts will really provide the miracle.

  31. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Nathan: Burnett, Sanchez, Duensing…

    @Adam: Nope

  32. Simply Fred

    Simply Fred says:
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    @Grey: O.K. What are your thoughts regarding Burnett?

  33. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Simply Fred: Seattle’s a terrible hitting team.

  34. Simply Fred

    Simply Fred says:
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    @Grey: Good enough. My learning curve is (not surprisingly) higher than I thought. Actually, would like to see something get Burnett on track. Maybe this will do the trick.

  35. papasmurf says:
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    F-More wasn’t the only Morales stinking last night. Kendry, K-More, was indeed kaying more.

    He’s really been crap through 2 weeks so far this month. By far his worst month this yr.

  36. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Nathan: Just realized I missed Buchholz. I’d go Burnett, Buchholz and Sanchez…

  37. kwak says:
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    Thoughts on Maholm Sunday @ Pirates? Better than the West or Tejeda match ups? (reds and wsox)

    Seen Stubbs’ line this week?
    5r 2hr 5rbi 3sb

    I hate that guy. Had him for 3 0-fer days last week and comes back with that line. Jerk.

  38. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @kwak: I’d prefer Maholm over West. I have seen Stubbs line, I own him in a league where I need speed and not power. Jerk, indeed.

  39. Nathan says:
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    Miguel Olivo for the win!

  40. peter says:
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    Through 3 innings, E. Jackson has given up 5 runs to KC. If he can’t do better against the Royals, it’s time to cut the cord. Not that it matters, as it looks like this start might be costing me the championship anyway.

  41. mr baseball says:
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    Sources have informed the Chicago Tribune’s Paul Sullivan that the Cubs are shutting Rich Harden down for the rest of the season.

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