You’re Pants-less today, and as luck and a muggy morning would have it, I’m pantsless today too. Don’t overthink this, please. Dan Pants needed the day off, so I’m here to step into his, uhh, pants, and deliver you the roundup you knew you didn’t want but didn’t know you needed.

Speaking of what we need, we need more Aaron Judge home runs. Last night Judge walked three times, as the A’ss gave him their best Barry Bonds treatment, but also like Bonds when Judge got a pitch to hit, he sent it into the seats for his 49th homer of the year, a 3-run job. He’s currently on pace for 63 HRs, which would be an AL and Yankee record, and the most HRs since Bonds hit 73 in 2001. His pace is still well off of Bonds’s pace, but, you know. It’s still exciting for baseball and a fun storyline to follow as the Yankees lead their division by approximately the same number of games as Judge has homers.

Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:


Bryan Reynolds – 1-for-4, HR (21), 2 RBI. Reynolds rapped one over the fence when Bailey Falter’d in his pitch execution.

Oneil Cruz – 0-for-2, triple-slashing .197/.250/.394. Cruz out here making Rodolfo Castro (2-for-4, triple-slashing .246/.312/.421) look like a superstar by comparison.

J.T. Realmuto – 0-for-4, SB (16), batting .272. Realmuto giving his owners what they drafted him for, that sweet, sweet, catcher speed. J.T. standing for “Just Thefts.”

Rhys Hoskins – 2-for-4, 2B, 2 runs, hitting .247. No homers for the Phils in this game vs. Pittsburgh, but Rhys, Nick Castellanos (2-for-4, 2B) and Alec Bohm (2-for-4) all had a pair of hits for the balanced Philly attack.

Brad Hand – 1 IP, 0 ER, 5th save, ERA at 1.86. Gotta Hand it to Brad, he’s been danged good at the back-end of the Philadelphia ‘pen.

Cade Cavalli – 4.1 IP, 7 ER, 6 Ks. Cavalli’s first start brought some good news (6 Ks over 4.1 IP), but the bad news was about everything else. I hope you weren’t counting on him to save your H2H week.

Mike Minor – 7 IP, 2 ER, 7 Ks, ERA at 6.10. Everybody, and I mean everybody, is a good start vs. the Gnats.

Jonathan India – 2-for-3, 3 runs, hitting .250. Is India doing good things on days when Grey doesn’t write him up going to be a thing? I kind of hope so, mostly so we can see if he (Grey, not India) goes more and more insane each of the last month-plus of Saturdays, sort of like a baseball version of the Tell-Tale Heart or something.

Donovan Solano – 2-for-5, 2 runs, 2 RBI, batting .335. It’s only 176 ABs for Solano, but it’s barely been more (191) for Cruz and we Cruz owners are burning old wiffle ball bats at night as sacrifices to the baseball gods for some Solano-like production from him. Just me? “Hoove, just point on the doll where Cruz hurt you.”

Luke Voit – 1-for-4, HR (17), hitting .225. Voit has twice as many homers with Washington as Soto has with San Diego (4 to 2), and Washington also got top-shelf prospect James Wood. Yet another team taking advantage of A.J. Preller at the trade deadline.

Reid Detmers – 5.1 IP, W (5-4), 0 ER, 5 Ks, ERA at 3.47. The Angels scored seven runs in the first three innings and Detmers cruised to the win on the I-victory coast.

Mike Trout – 1-for-5, 2 RBI, HR (27), hitting .271. Trout hit his homer off of Yusei Kikuchi, so we’re awaiting word from MLB on if they’ll actually count that on Trout’s official stats.

Jo Adell – 4-for-5, 3 runs, 3 RBI, HR (2), hitting .235. Adell hit his homer off of Whit Merrifield, and we’re awaiting word on if–*puts finger to earbud*–MLB just informed us that Adell’s home run off Merrifield is actually more legit than Trout’s off of Kikuchi. Last week when I wrote this column I said “Adell just isn’t going to hit, is he?” and even if you take away his hit off of Merrifield, he was still 3-for-4. Is it too late to apologize, Adell? Wait, wrong singer.

David Fletcher – 3-for-5, 2 runs, 2 RBI, SB, hitting. 278. David contributed to the rout with a Fletcher Home Run (a double), which is kind of like the little league home run when the crappy team can’t catch or throw the ball at all and you just run all the way around the bases because nobody actually stops you.

Matt Chapman – 0-for-1, 3 BBs. When you get beat 12-0, your best box score line probably looks something like this.

Ryan McMahon – 2-for-4, run, 2B. As a McMahon owner who asks himself nearly daily, “Why do I roster this schmohawk?” it’s great seeing him bat atop the Rockie lineup yet again.

C.J. Cron – 3-for-4, RBI, hitting .270. If I wanted singles, I’d roster Joey Wendle! C.J. must stand for “Collapsing Juice,” though his 84 RBI will play.

Brett Baty – 1-for-4, HR (2) – Brett with the Baty call!

Pete Alonso – 2-for-5, walk-off RBI, hitting .273. Don’t compare Alonso’s season to Cake Batter’s season…unless you’re an Alonso owner.

Mookie Betts – 4-for-6, 3 runs, 4 RBI, 2B, 2 HRs (29), SB (12), hitting .278. Mookie Best! What a season this dude is having, and it is kind of getting lost a little behind the fantastic Au Shizz performance.

Freddie Freeman – 2-for-6, 2 runs, 2B, hitting .326. Freef should be a HOFer; what say you?

Tyler Anderson – 5.1 IP, 1 ER, 4 Ks, ERA at 2.69. Those poor Dodgers with all of those pitcher injuries; why can’t they just catch a break and have some run-of-the-mill guys like Anderson and Gonsolin step up?

Joey Wendle – 2-for-5, 3 RBI, 2B. G’on head, Mr. Wendle! I’m sorry, Joey! I wasn’t trying to insult you earlier. Promise!

Peyton Burdick – 2-for-5, HR (2). I’d like to think that if he ever got in trouble and needed to get a new identity like Saul Goodman/Gene Takovic, he’d go by Robin Schlong.

Yandy Diaz – 3-for-4, 2 runs, 2B, HR (8) hitting .280. Led off the game with a Diaz Dong off of Michael Wacha. I never think of Diaz as a great leadoff hitter, but the AVG and the OBP (.389) indicate I should pay better attention. I should also as a general rule not question the Rays about almost anything.

Jose Siri – 2-for-4, 2 runs, 3 RBI, 2B, HR (8), hitting .196. “Siri, do you think Josh Lowe could do this well?”

Xander Bogaerts – 2-for-5, 2 runs, 3 RBI, HR (11), hitting .301. He’s still going to sign for more money than I’ll ever see this offseason, but his lack of impact this year may take some money off the top of his next contract.

Alex Verdugo – 2-for-4, 2B, 3B, hitting .282. Bogaerts’s 11 HRs is what I’d expect to see from Verdugo.

Enrique Hernandez – 3-for-5. Kevin Plawecki also had three hits this game (in four ABs), and I actually went to their player pages to see if they were the first three hits these guys have had all year. Turns out they’ve had more, though I’m not sure anybody can truly prove it.

Franchy Cordero – 1-for-2, HR (7). A Franchy fly!

Nate Lowe – 2-for-3, HR (21), hitting .298. Could’ve done a lot worse from your corner infield position this year than Brandon’s and Josh’s big brother.

Leody Taveras – 2-for-4, 2 runs, hitting .294. Grey, can you write a sleeper post for Leody next year? One that will say different things than ‘pert sleeper articles written about Leody any time in the last four years

Ezequiel Duran – 1-for-4, 3 RBI, HR (4), hitting .251. Would like to see him hit for a little higher average, but he’s been solid in his time up for the Rangers this year. His 3-run blast off of Tyler Alexander (3 IP, 7 ER) helped open the floodgates early before the Rangers had to fend off a fierce Detroit comeback.

Riley Greene – 3-for-4, 3 runs, 4 RBI, 3B, HR (5), hitting .246. Kinda hope Riley gets hot the last month just to give us Tigers fans some positive vibes heading into the off-season, kinda hope he keeps under the radar so I can buy him everywhere next year. If I were any bigger of a Riley stan, Eminem would write a song about me.

Tommy Henry – 5 IP, 1 ER, 3 Ks, ERA at 3.25. Henry didn’t come through the minors with much fanfare as a guy with great “stuff” but he’s just gotten people out at all levels, and the D-backs may have a little something going forward with this guy. #goblue

Daulton Varsho – 3-for-4, 2 runs, HR (18). Like Grey said the other day, rarely do the “guy with C eligibility who plays all the time at other positions so make sure you draft them for your C!” guys live up to that theory, but Varsho has absolutely been worth it.

A.J. Pollock – 2-for-4, 2B, HR (8). How many Pollocks does it take to keep the White Sox from getting drubbed by the D-backs?

Johnny Cueto – 5 IP, 7 ER, 4 Ks, ERA at 2.98. The fact that Cueto just got smoked for 7 ER and still has a sub-3.00 ERA shows you how useful (terrific?) he’s been for your teams this year.

Kyle Bradish – 8 IP, 0 ER, 6 Ks, ERA at 5.63. I couldn’t be more excited to adopt the Orioles as my non-Detroit team I cheer for this season. These guys were theoretically a year or two away, sold at the trade deadline, and they still nightly get dudes like Bradish stepping up against probably the best team in the AL (Houston) to keep them pushing for a wild card berth. I wanna see Aaron Judge hit pissmissles, but I also want to see the Birds in a wild card series and Camden Yards going crazy.

Ramon Urias – 2-for-4, 2 RBI, HR (14). Just like Earl Weaver used to draw it up–get Urias to smack a 2-run dinger, and that’s all Bradish needs against the ‘Stros.

Alex Bregman – 2-for-4, hitting .269. Wait, no HRs or XBHs? Get Bregman and his wife some Boone’s farm, a private room, and let’s get another bambino on the way ASAP. This guy has been a machine since he became a dad.

Justin Steele – 5.1 IP, 1 ER, 6 Ks, ERA at 3.18. I picked Steele up off of waivers in my dynasty league (why was he dropped?) and then didn’t have the pants-cantaloupes to start him. Didn’t get the win, but still feels kind of like a sonofabench.

Ian Happ – 2-for-4, 4 RBI, 2 HR (15), hitting .280. Happ was literally the entire Cubs offense last night–they had two hits and four runs. And they won!

Freddy Peralta – 6 IP, 0 hits, 0 ER, 1 BB, 5 Ks, ERA at 3.69. The Brewers are still taking it a little easy with Peralta, as he was pulled after six innings with a no-hitter intact. There are bigger fish to fry (beer battered fish, I’d assume, in Milwaukee) to waste Peralta’s bullets right now.

Rowdy Tellez – 2-for-3, 2 RBI, HR (27). Rowdy Tellez-ported a Brandon Hughes hanger into the stands as he continues his chase for a 30-HR season.

Joe Musgrove – 3.2 IP, 8 hits, 5 R (2 earned), 2 Ks, ERA at 2.96. Musgrove continuing to do his “not a good 2nd half pitcher” thing. Eight hits in less than four innings isn’t great, but at least it was just ticker shock for him.

Ha-Seong Kim – 3-for-6, HR (7), 5 RBI. Padres getting a HR and a handful of RBI from their shortstop, just like Preller drew it up in the preseason! The Pads offense exploded for 13 runs last night, with Wil Myers (3-for-5, 2 runs, 3 RBI, HR) and Jake Cronenworth (2-for-5, 2 runs, 2 RBI, HR) also having big nights for the Dads.

Nick Pratto – 2-for-4, 2 RBI, 2B, HR (4). Pratto is only hitting .176 and strikes out too much, so this line is pretty much like his minor-league story as well–lots of Ks, good power.

Joe Ryan – 6 IP, 0 ER, 8 Ks, ERA at 3.65. Wait, a Twins starter went longer than 5 IP? If I had the ambition I’d look up when the last time that was, or how often that’s happened in the last month, but it’s late, and I don’t, so I’ll just assume it’s the first time since the All-Star Break. Much-needed great outing from Ryan, though.

Kyle Garlick – 3-for-4, 3 runs, hitting .275. “Man, something stinks!” “Nah, it’s just Garlick.” “No, it’s just Jorge Polanco and his .237 AVG.”

Carlos Correa – 2-for-3, 2 runs, 2 RBI, HR (15), hitting .267. He’s earning his money better than, say, Javier Baez is, but for that whole “best FA shortstop class in history” thing, Correa has been kind of underwhelming given all the “Will he get $330 million?” talk.

Alex Wood – 3 IP, 8 ER, ERA at 5.00. This outing gave me the opposite of Wood, Alex.

Spencer Strider – 6 IP, 1 ER, 7 Ks, ERA at 2.87. Just give him the trophy, and please don’t wreck this sweet, sweet man’s arm pushing for the postseason, Braves.

William Contreras – 4-for-5, 2 runs, 3 RBI, 2B, hitting .275. I wonder if William’s mom is as proud of he is as Kyle Seager’s mom is of Corey?

Travis d’Arnaud – 2-for-4, 2 runs, 2B, RBI, hitting .267. Look at the big-brain Braves using two Cs in most of their lineups. I guess when you go 6-for-9 with four runs and four RBI, you roll both of them out there and rack up the numbers.

Tyler O’Neill – 1-for-3, 2 RBI, HR (9), hitting .229. Great 3rd round pick for my NFBC team, Hoove! It’s early May, right?

Shane Bieber – 7 IP, 1 ER, 9 Ks, ERA at 3.02. I owned Bieber in my dynasty league and was 100% freaked out by his big drop in velo early in the year. Figured an injury was to blame after his shoulder issues last year, and sold him for Bregman. I’m not unhappy with Bregman, but Bieber just took the velo loss and still figured out a way to be a top-15ish SP.

Logan Gilbert – 6.1 IP, 2 ER, 2 Ks, ERA at 3.49. Don’t really see top-line with Gilbert, but he’s probably going to settle in really nicely as a guy to give them good quality seasons, with peak of top-20 SP, and a guy you’ll be happy to just plug in and count up the ratios/numbers at the end of September.

Amed Rosario – 2-for-5, 2B, SB (12), batting .286. Always feels like Rosario should steal 30 bags because MLB The Show always gives him really good speed. He and his infield mate (next blurb have been fantastic for the Tribe as they push for the AL Central crown.

Andres Gimenez – 1-for-5, 2B, hitting .304. Maybe you didn’t realize it (maybe it was just me who didn’t realize it), but Gimenez is slugging nearly .500. Last week I asked how many 2B you’d take over Gimenez next year, starting with Altuve/Albies, and then…? That’s still where I’m at.

Julio Rodriguez – 0-for-4, 3 Ks, hitting .267. Can you believe the M’s threw all that money at this guy?!?! Then he rewards them by going hitless with a bunch of Ks. You could’ve paid him Javy Baez money to go hitless and strike out three times! Hope you’ve turned your sarcasm detector on this fine Saturday before blowing me up in the comments for this.

Mitch Haniger – 2-for-5, 2B, run, RBI, walk-off hit, batting .280. What a fun game, and a possible preview of October. I’m not sick of the regular season yet, but these kinds of games/series really get me pumped for playoff baseball. Haniger also had a swim-move slide into second base that would make Aaron Donald jealous he didn’t use the same technique while hitting fools with a football helmet.