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The title of this post is more indicative of what the fantasy baseball season does to us than to what this player will do for you. How nutty was week 1? I’m loving drafting Adrian Gonzalez in the 4th round of the Razzball Pert’s league, and pissed at myself for not drafting J.D. Martinez anywhere. I really liked J.D. coming into the year and yet got sniped on him every time I was ready to draft him. Same goes for Matt Harvey. I heart you two and will look to trade for you at premium prices if I must. Wait! What? No I won’t. Yes you will. Okay, maybe I will, but sometimes you have to pay a price to get the toys you want. The bills on my Impala can attest to that. Before I move into this week’s creeper, I want to thank all the commenters that came out for the Easter Creeper. What a great kick off to the MLB season…thanks guys. It was a great opener for the baseball season.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Back in your humble-but-nonetheless-handsome Guru’s R-O-C-K in the U.S.A. days, I was working for a famous writing Mainer who also happened to own a radio station that doubled as a house of horrors. I was later fired for playing “The Lesbian Dating Game” and “doing things unbecoming of an employee” in the station’s van. Allegedly. But I digress. The job was cool and so was the “king”, but the program director was the kind of vertically challenged guy that put the double SOB in the word boss, if you know what I mean. I won’t mention his name either, but we called him “The Little Bastard”. He got that nickname one night backstage at a John Mellencamp show when he called the original little bastard “The Cougs” and got a face full of bourbon. *Puts pinky to mouth* come on baby, you make it hurt so good. I was never much of a fan of Mellencamp – Please, Mommy, don’t send us to Mellen Camp again there’s Mexican’s there –  but after watching one Napoleonic sufferer destroy another, I’ve been in his corner ever since. I fight authority and authority always wins. Thus concludes the Guru’s 432nd edition of (insert echo effect here) “Brush With Fame”. Next time we’ll talk about Aerosmith, black nail polish, and Liv Tyler – the statute of limitations has long expired me thinks. Today’s little ditty on our jam or cram has us looking at some of last week’s chart toppers and trying to decide if they are one hit wonders or Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductees. We’re not talking about running Albert Pujols or Jose Fernandez through the ol’ jammer crammer machine© here. What we are looking for is whether or not those players that rocked last week (and are under 50% owned) are worth a hand to hold on to. Now that I’m fresh out of John Mellencamp references it’s time to jam it or cram it.

Please, blog, may I have some more?