Been saying for the last four months it’s crazy anyone would draft Chris Sale this year. Or maybe it was just so brazen, like a guy wearing no helmet on a motorcycle in the rain. You got cantaloupes in your pants, you absolute loon! It was like somehow everyone forgot the narrative all of last year was he lost his velocity and his elbow was bothering him. Like a coconut hit their head and they woke up thinking they were Ginger from Gilligan’s Island and that Sale would stay healthy. Alas, you fruit loops, he will start the year on the IL as he heads for an MRI on his elbow. Next stop will be a lost season for him. The people drafting Sale early on, even with a discount, well, I’ve never seen people convince themselves of nonsense like I see in fantasy sports. “He’ll be fine! It was just the flu! His elbow is feeling great! Great, I tell you!” Use some common sense! You kinda deserve to lose if you drafted Sale in any leagues. Everyone saying things like, “Oh, you’re a doctor now, I guess. You saw this coming, I imagine.” Don’t guess, Goofy McGoofstein! I was pre-med for two months of my freshman year in college! Also, it doesn’t take a doctor to know if a guy missed time due to an arm injury last year, showed up to camp after refusing surgery on his arm, you should avoid him. If only I could’ve placed a bet on whether or not anyone drafting Sale in the first few weeks of drafts would regret it. Damn, I would’ve been a billionaire (assuming I could bet a billionaire dollars and had even odds, but I technically would’ve only made that bet if I were a billionaire already). While singing Happy Birthday twice, I’ve washed my hands of Chris Sale. He’s temporarily ranked in the top 40 starters, but I wouldn’t draft him anywhere (as I wouldn’t have before this), and the next step I imagine will be crossing him out of the top 500 for 2020 fantasy baseball. Anyway, here’s what else I saw in spring training for fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
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With these top 100 starters for 2020 fantasy baseball, I’ve finished our (my) 2020 fantasy baseball rankings for positions. Still coming will be a top 100 overall and top 500 to see how all the positions mesh together like your mesh Redskins jersey that meshes with your burgundy sweatpants. Trust me, when you see how long this post is, you’ll be glad I kept this intro short. All the 2020 fantasy baseball rankings are there. Here’s Steamer’s 2020 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Hitters and 2020 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Pitchers. Here’s all the 2020 fantasy baseball auction rankings. As always, my projections are included, and where I see tiers starting and stopping. If you want an explanation of tiers, go back to the top 10 overall and start this shizz all over again. Anyway, here’s the top 100 starters for 2020 fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Trevor Story hit the IL with a thumb sprain, which is bad news (no dur), but the Rockies are saying there’s no ligament damage, so it could’ve been worse. The good news is Brendan Rodgers was promoted. Is this good news? For Rodgers, I’d imagine it is. For the Uber driver taking Rodgers to the airport? Prolly good news for them. The guy sitting next to Rodgers on the plane having to hear about how Rodgers is not going to sit on the bench for Pat Valaika, this time, things are gonna be different? Doesn’t sound like good news for that guy sitting next to him. What a bore! Okay, so I know, I know, I KNOW the Rockies have burned us all to the point where we shudder at commercials for Burn Notice reruns on USA, but there is a reason why the Rockies have burned us. Because we all want to own all of them due to the stadium. I grabbed Rodgers for that very reason. We shall see, but I put it at 70/30 the Rockies play Pat Valaika, and 30 is for: Rodgers doesn’t play, is sent down and Hampson is recalled to also not play. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
For Mother’s Day, all MLB players use pink bats. On Father’s Day, all bats should be painted to resemble penises. I try to convince MLB of this every year, and every year I’m met with awkward silence. Another Father’s Day, another year MLB didn’t take my suggestion for an, uh, equipment update. How about they use the pink bats again, but with hanging scrotum on the knobs? They could at least call all home runs on Father’s Day “dongs,” or if the player is over the age of 35, then they’re long balls. These are not big fixes I’m asking them to do. So, Edwin Encarnacion took his long balls (see?!) to the Yankees (unintentional pun, but still worthwhile). Turns out the Home Run Parrot on Edwin’s shoulder is a better agent than Kimbrel’s. “Polly want 15%.” This made me chuckle: reporters on Saturday suggesting the new potential Yankees’ lineup had Edwin Encarnacion penciled in as a question mark like he was some mystery-flavor Dum-Dum. It’s because Encarnacion doesn’t really make sense for the Yankees — is he the DH? (Voit? Judge? Stanton?) 1st base? (LeMahieu) — but they’ll find room for him since he was the AL leader in home runs. Clint Frazier was sent to the minors, as he awaits a trade; this will completely kill Gio Urshela’s value, and might hurt DJ LeMahieu’s, as well. With Giancarlo and Judge returning, Gardner’s about to become the 4th outfielder, Maybin’s gonna get DFA’d and Aaron Hicks better make sure he doesn’t slump or he’s going to be benched too. Of course, all of this becomes moot when Judge, Stanton and Edwin all get hurt this week. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Handed down through the generations from Hammurabi to Hammurabi was a code of SAGNOF. It read, “Yo, Hamm-whaaaaaazzzzzup-be?! Don’t pay for saves, dem shizzes are free on waivers.” It read a bit like a text message, tee bee aitch. But that was the code as written. Cut to 14,000 years later, and I received this code in a dream after ingesting a massive amount of peyote. I would’ve discarded it like the iguana I also received, but there was something to this code, and from that day forward I forbade myself from paying a lot for saves. Then March came and Craig Kimbrel was falling and I was like, “Ain’t ever gonna get a price like this again!” and drafted him, and not listening to Hamm-whaaaaaazzzzzup-be really effed me. Thankfully, my long national nightmare is over and Craig Kimbrel signed with the Cubs. Does this negate all the leagues where I have Pedro Strop? *Lisa Simpson grumble* Yes, appizzarently, it does. I’d imagine Kimbrel will need at least two to three weeks of minor league games to get up to snuff, but closers can get stretched quicker than starters, obvi. I wouldn’t drop Strop until I saw a Kimbrel save, but he’s coming back. Finally. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Jose Ramirez fouled a ball off his knee and was carted off the field. *long, painful swallow* Say what now? Thankfully, it turned out Jose Ramirez simply has a knee contusion and was carted off the field because he had reached his steps for the day. *claps hands* “Okay, guys, call me a cab, my FitBit says I’m done-zo.” That’s Jose Ramirez once he reaches 10,000 steps. I hear ya, Jo-Ram! I once sat down on an escalator because I had reached my “floors” for the day. I’m not over-exercising and dying young. Nuh-uh! You don’t mess with age expectancy. I’m already down on Ramirez in a non-sexual way, so this doesn’t change my stance on him, and, if you like him, it doesn’t sound like it should change your feelings either, since he appears healthy. Anyway, here’s what else I saw in spring training for fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Today concludes the fantasy baseball sleepers‘ portion of our program. *nudges homeless woman sleeping on my couch that I tried to get Cougs to agree to a threesome with* No more sleepers, Francine. Meh, I’ll let her rest. Like the outfielders to target, this post is necessary. You need to target the right names at the end of the draft for starters. Last year’s starters to target post included Jameson Taillon, Blake Snell, Charlie Morton, Miles Mikolas, Trevor Williams and Patrick Corbin. All guys who this year are in the top 40 for starters, with two making the jump to my top 20 starters., and, one, well, can you believe ESPN ranked Snell 242nd overall last year? Also, on a side note, Fantasy Pros recently talked about ‘perts who had foresaw breakouts last year, and they didn’t mention Blake Snell (or Jo-Ram or Acuña), but mentioned Jose Urena, Jared Hughes and Wade LeBlanc by three writers from sites that help or support them. Not to get too aluminum-foil-hat-wearing here, but, if you don’t think they have an agenda with who they highlight, you’re not seeing the big picture. As with other target posts, these guys are being drafted after the top 200 overall. Anyway, here’s some starters to target for 2019 fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Every off-season I like to target players who are flying under the radar because they were busts the year before but had quality performances the season prior. Their lack of excellence could have been caused by injury, changing teams and cities, or maybe they celebrated their career year a little too hard and showed up to spring training out of shape and never recovered. Typically, we’re targeting guys in the 6th through 12th rounds that could return top 20 value. I’ve identified 12 players that meet the criteria of having proven success in 2017 but failed to live up to expectations for various reasons in 2018.Please, blog, may I have some more?
I don’t pay much attention to Spring Training Statistics. You never know who the statistics are coming against. Baseball-Reference did, however, have an amazing tool last year that attempted to quantify the quality of opposing pitchers or batters faced during spring training games on a scale from 1-10 with 10 being MLB talent and 1-3 being high A to low A level. This tool is great, but it averages all the Plate Appearances or batters faced. You would still need a deeper dive to see if your stud prospect smacked a donger off of Chris Sale or off of your kid’s future pony league baseball coach. So what should we watch for in March when we’re starved for the crack of the bat? Ignore “best shape of their life” stories and Spring Training statistical leaderboards. Pay attention to injuries and lineup construction and position battles! Also pay attention to where Bryce Harper and Manny Machado sign… Note that those two signings can instantly eliminate some of the position battles detailed herein.Please, blog, may I have some more?
With the top 80 starters for 2019 fantasy baseball, we are so close to the end of the rankings, I can almost taste it! Wait, that’s not rankings I taste, I bit my lip and it’s blood. I wonder if when Dracula bites his lip it’s like when Cougs goes out with her friends and I’m left at home while Emmanuelle is on Cinemax. I’ll go over exactly how to draft starters in a few days, but there are so many ways to skin a cat we should have PETA breathing down our necks. Also, I’m hoping to do the RCL signups next Monday. Stay tuned! Or not, your call. All the 2019 fantasy baseball rankings are there. Here’s Steamer’s 2019 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Hitters and 2019 Fantasy Baseball Projections for Pitchers. All projections listed are mine and I mention where I see tiers starting and stopping. Anyway, here’s the top 80 starters for 2019 fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?