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Finally, a trade! No team but the A’s could make Sean Murphy into the impetus for a three-team trade with eight players involved. Sean Murphy to the A’s; Oakland gets Kyle Muller, Esteury Ruiz, Freddy Tarnok, Royber Salinas and Manny Pina; Milwaukee gets William Contreras, Justin Yeager and Joel Payamps. Braves turning William Contreras into Sean Murphy, presumably at DH and catcher, is such a why bother for the Braves that I wonder if Alex Anthopoulos just had to trade William Contreras because he wouldn’t agree to a 17-year, $12 million deal. “You won’t agree to being a Braves player for life for $75,000 a year? Then, I’m sorry, you have to go.” We know Billy Beane, Anthopoulos and the Brewers’ GM, whoever that is, don’t play fantasy baseball, because if they did, they’d know to never pick their catcher scab. Ron Popeil, food appliance guru and master fantasy baseballer, once said, “Set it and forget it.” Seriously, I’m trying to figure out the difference between Murphy and Contreras and I am at a literal loss. In Oakland, the will is gone; and in Atlanta the William. Sean Murphy was the 6th best catcher on the Player Rater last year, and, while it looks like he overperformed on average, there is something to a team as bad as the Vegas A’s just rolling a guy like Murphy out there for 150-ish games. It’s Murphy’s Law. In a better lineup, he might lose a few at-bats, but, as said above, he has the DH too. For 2023, I’ll give Sean Murphy projections of 66/20/73/.244/1 in 502 ABs. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this offseason for 2023 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

As mentioned many times in the past, there’s different types of fantasy baseball sleepers. They can’t all be, “Who the H-E-double hockey sticks are you talking about?” Some guys are going to be no dur sleepers. Jake McCarthy is interesting because I think he might be both, depending on what kind of league you’re in. I could see him being a “What the H-E-double hockey sticks” in some leagues with people who are immersed in fantasy baseball all year long. There’s others though, who don’t follow fantasy baseball year-round. and these people are the real freaks. They have lives six months of the year when there’s no baseball? That sounds nuts, to be honest. For those absolute freaks, they might not realize how good Jake McCarthy was last year, and could let him slip in drafts. The slightly hilarious thing is the big box sites like ESPN are in this group, as they also cater to the freaks. I have no idea at this point, as I write this in October, and you read it in December, but I wouldn’t be surprised to see Jake McCarthy ranked around 275 overall at ESPN, if at all. He’s the kind of guy that is just completely overlooked. Therefore, ergo, vis-a-vie, if you’re seeing Jake McCarthy 2023 fantasy baseball sleeper and thinking, “No dur.” You’re right, he should be no dur, but he won’t be no dur for all people. If you’re thinking, “Okay, if you’re writing this for freaks, and I’m reading it, does it make me a freak?” No, you’re reading this in December. You’re no freak. Unless you read this in March. Then you be a freak. So, what can we expect from Jake McCarthy for 2023 fantasy baseball and what makes him a sleeper?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Taylor Ward as a fantasy baseball sleeper feels like one of those:  By March, everyone is going to write at least one sleeper post for Taylor Ward and some people will write two so he will be a sleeper in name only. That’s fine, they can’t all be “Drafted around 300th overall” sleepers. I’ve been wrong about things like this before. Not wrong on whether a guy will be good or not, I’m never wrong about that. Shut up about Adalberto Mondesi! Literally no one is asking you for a list of names I was wrong about. Yes, I thought Jonathan India was a star, and it turned out I was just reading a Star of India takeout menu. Can you please stop listing all of my many mistakes now? Thanks. I mean, I’ve been wrong in the past about whether a player will be hyped as a sleeper, then they’re not. It’s harder to understand what others are thinking than what players will do. All of the stats, that I will get to in a second, show Taylor Ward will be undervalued, but will everyone else see that? My guess is yes, but who knows? Thought it was obvious to not draft starters in the first 15 picks overall, and I’ve been wrong about people catching on with that for about a decade. Last year, Taylor Ward went 73/23/65/.281/5 in 495 ABs. That’s *holds hand over mouth while yawning*, right? No? Ah, you’re one step ahead of me, let me catch up. So, what can we expect from Taylor Ward for 2023 fantasy baseball and what makes him a sleeper?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Aaron Judge grew up in San Francisco. He told associates of mine at the Winter Meetings that he can still remember which Walgreen’s he was in when he witnessed his first shoplifting. He wistfully remembered, “I was by the breath mints, and this man carried out six boxes of Wheat Thins.” Fond memories for Judge that are going to hard to replicate when he signs a 1-year deal with the Giants in ten years. As we all assumed, Aaron Judge re-signed with the Yankees through his age-39 season. Luckily, Razzball has a time machine at its disposal, and I went forward nine years to take a quick pic of Aaron Judge when he’s in that final year. Here it is:

So, Aaron Judge on the Yankees is more of the same. *claps hands, all done* No? Okay. Not sure how many people heard this, but it was reported the other day that MLB used three different baseballs last year. One of those balls was more batter-friendly. It was found only at the All-Star Game, Home Run Derby, postseason and Yankees games. This sounds like a joke, but the jokes ended with the guy walking out with Wheat Thins. I’m being serious now. Yo, jai alai called, it wants its “this sport is a joke” moniker back. MLB embraces gambling and institutes cheating by way of different balls. It truly is incredible.

Last year, Aaron Judge went 62/16/.311, guys and five girl readers, and that is the best line of all-time. 40/40 is nice; 50/10 is butter; 60/5 is nomnomnom, get in my belly; 62/12? I mean, c’mon. Seriously, c’mon. C’mon, c’mon! C’mon, c’mon, c’mon! It’s ludicrous. It’s mind boggling. Thesaurus, give me another synonym! It’s BREATHTAKING!!! He always had power — he’s a freakin’ giant, of course he has power! — but he’s never hit .300 or stole more than six bags in a season before. Also, being a certified giant (and not a Giant, as was rumored), he’s prone to injuries. That year of 62/12 wasn’t just a career year, it was the career year of career years. How’sever, if he goes 40/10/.280, it’s still very doable and a great. For 2023, I’ll give Aaron Judge projections of 109/41/102/.283/10 in 548 ABs. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this offseason for 2023 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Imagine a very good boy sitting at attention, let’s call that boy, Treat Urner. Treat Urner is looking at you with those doe-eyes giving you all kinds of oxytocin. Your brain is firing off like July 4th over the Hudson. My God it feels good! Stare at me Treat Urner and give me more and more oxytocin! Wag your tail and give me the love! In a baby voice, you lean in, “What does Treat Urner want? Does Treat Urner want a treat? Does he? Okay, to earn one of those treats you need to steal 30 bags, hit 25 homers and hit .300. Can the good boy do that? He can? Aw, what a good Treat Urner this Treat Urner is! Here…” Then I throw the treat into the yard, it lands in the bushes and we spend the next twenty minutes trying to figure out where that stupid treat landed while he licks my ears. Treat Urner was going to be great wherever he went. Landing in Philly gets Kyle Schwarber out of the leadoff slot. Right…RIGHT?! Please someone say I’m right. I don’t want to go to Amoeba Records and scratch Rob Thomas’s name off every CD as an act of deviance vs. the Phils’ manager. By the by, Trea Turner getting 11 years is quite funny.

But, of course, this is for this year, and there’s no one better, when consistency is factored in. Just an absolute lock for great counting stats. Now in Philly, it should help maintain the power, that isn’t top-flight, but good enough for a guy with his speed. Hopefully, he doesn’t pay too close attention to all the other Phils’ fly ball tendencies. “So, you’re saying I should have a Launch Angle of 26? Okay!” That’s Trea Turner at the batting cage with Rhys Hoskins and The Schwammer. No, stay away, Treat Urner! Good boy! For 2023, I’ll give Trea Turner projections of 107/22/101/.293/30 in 606 ABs. That means Treastykakes are the best food in Philly since Chase steaks! Anyway, here’s what else I saw this offseason for 2023 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

“You can spend any amount of money, but it has to be in the months of November and December, then from the months of April thru October you have to stink.”

Rangers’ GM, the 8-foot tall Chris Young shakes his head, lowering the last will and testament of the Rangers’ crazy aunt Mary, who just passed. Finally, Young says, “This is more convoluted than Brewster’s Millions.”

Don’t fully understand it, but the Rangers print money in December of every year, then set it on fire all summer long. It’s not clear how, why or any other question you have. All I know is the Rangers have made this their MO. It truly is impressive if you stop to think about it. I’m glad they’re spending money, but real questions: Where is all this money coming from and are they ever going to win anything? So, the latest spend was on Jacob deGrom, giving him $222 million. Good for him. As I said at one point last year, when he’s healthy, he’s one of the best pitchers in the game. Speaking of which, as frequent contributor, Coolwhip, reminded me: What will deGrom’s health be like without the Mets’ trainers? 220 IP incoming! I kid, I think. No, I don’t think deGrom will suddenly be the model of good health. He has a better chance of being a cover model on Men’s Health next to a topless Bartolo Colon. Speaking of the Mets:

So, Jacob deGrom goes to a great park, but he’s stadium-proof. He’s in a new league, but he’s league-proof. He’s the best pitcher in the game, who can’t get past 92 IP since 2021. He could be one of the biggest lottery tickets in fantasy baseball drafts, but, unless he fell, I won’t be trying to cash it. His 14.3 K/9, 1.1 BB/9, and 1.54 xFIP last year are so ridiculous. In 64 IP or 15 IP, it doesn’t matter. No one is better, it’s just “no one is better” for how many innings? That’s the question. For 2023, I’ll give Jacob deGrom projections of 10-2/2.26/0.83/167 in 107 IP. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this offseason for 2023 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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Last year, Vaughn Grissom went 19/32/.320-ish. That’s “ish” because I didn’t feel like doing the math for batting average. Plus, it’s goofy and those aren’t really his stats. Well, they are, kinda. That’s his stats if you combine High-A, Double-A and MLB numbers. Slightly misleading, but *thinking* Is it misleading? Okay, the major leagues aren’t High-A. I get that, but, and here’s when I say anything very controversial: For hitters, are they that different, when a guy is only 21 years old? If a guy is 28 years old in High-A, then his stats mean nothing. But if a guy is 21 years old, then what’s the difference where he’s playing if he can hit in the majors? Once a guy shows he can hit in the majors, then it validates everything that came before, when he’s young. I keep doing that caveat, because it is very important. A guy who is 30 years old hitting well in the minors may or may not transfer to the majors *cough* Joey Meneses *cough*. A guy, who is 21 tearing the ball up in the minors, is just good no matter where he’s going to play. You see it in all the future stars. It’s not the only path. A guy can struggle, then find something that clicks. But when it clicks that early anywhere in pro ball, he’s has got a high ceiling. That the Braves don’t seem to want to bring back Dansby Swanson implies they know it too. I’m only surprised they haven’t yet locked up Vaughn Grissom in a 12-year, 19-million dollar type deal. So, what can we expect from Vaughn Grissom for 2023 fantasy baseball and what makes him a sleeper?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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Usually not a “Yankees game watcher” but I became a “Yankees game watcher” over the last six weeks of the season, because of the Aaron Judge home run chase, and then the playoffs, so by being a “Yankees game watcher” I became an “Oswaldo Cabrera watcher,” and, as I became an “Oswaldo Cabrera watcher,” I became an “Oswaldo Cabrera believer,” then, slowly, without even trying, against my better judgment, side thought separated by commas, I became an “Oswaldo Cabrera enjoyer.” As an “Oswaldo Cabrera enjoyer,” I’ve been impressed with his outfield defense, his poise in the box against some of the toughest pitchers, and his power and speed. An “Oswaldo Cabrera enjoyer” isn’t something I expected myself to become, but an “Oswaldo Cabrera enjoyer” I am. Quiz me on him, and you’ll see. Any question you have about “Oswaldo Cabrera” I can prove my “Oswaldo Cabrera enjoyer”-ness with just a flick of the finger, as I scroll the Google. Funnily enough, as an “Oswaldo Cabrera enjoyer,” you don’t get that title by just enjoying Oswaldo Cabrera, you have to enjoy him even while he’s not hitting incredibly well. His stats from last year 6/3/.247; 25.7% strikeout rate aren’t bad, but they’re not exactly affixing a match to the bottom of the earth and setting the world ablaze. Then again, I toyed with the autobiography title “IQ of 70” so what do I know? So, what can we expect from Oswaldo Cabrera for 2023 fantasy baseball and what makes him a sleeper?

Psyche! Before we get into the Oswaldo Cabrera sleeper post, just wanted to announce that I’ve begun to roll out my 2023 fantasy baseball rankings on our Patreon. It’s an early Hanukkah miracle! Or late Hanukah miracle, depending on when Hanukkah is this year. The Jews should really decide on one day to start Hanukah each year, and stick with it. It’s better for branding. Anyway II, the Oswaldo Cabrera sleeper:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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Almost didn’t write this fantasy baseball sleeper post. Not because I don’t like Rowdy Tellez. I like him a lot. I almost didn’t write it because I had written a fantasy baseball sleeper for Rowdy Tellez two years ago and I didn’t really want to go back to the same well, like a shook Baby M. After a good think on the subject, and, after meeting with my spiritual advisors (my dog, Ted), I realized I wasn’t writing Rowdy Tellez sleeper because of him, but because of me, which shouldn’t be a reason to not write a sleeper post. If I need to write a Rowdy Tellez sleeper post every year, then so help me I will write a Rowdy Tellez sleeper every year. Nay, as Fonzie’s horse would say, I will write a Rowdy Tellez sleeper post every day. This will be the winter of Rowdy Tellez sleepers. I, Grey Albright, will make one promise to you in my role as your Fantasy Master Lothario (don’t abbrievate), and that’s to write a Rowdy Tellez sleeper post every day for the rest of my life, if you agree to read it. You don’t agree to read more than one Rowdy Tellez sleeper? Oh, great, then this will be the only one. Also, one other reasons why I felt like I just had to write the Rowdy Tellez sleeper was because of how low he was being drafted and every time I looked up stats for another sleeper, I kept seeing Rowdy Tellez doing as well or better. So, what can we expect from Rowdy Tellez for 2023 fantasy baseball and what makes him a sleeper?

Psyche! Before we get into the Rowdy Tellez sleeper post, just wanted to announce that I’ve begun to roll out my 2023 fantasy baseball rankings on our Patreon. Also, I set up an NFBC league that starts drafting next Monday, but it’s a slow draft, so you don’t need to be by computer all day or anything. It’s a 15-team Draft Champions league, so 50 rounds, 4-hour per pick and no waivers. Draft and hold, as the kids say. If you want to draft against me, click this linkie-ma-whosie. Anyway II, the Rowdy Tellez sleeper:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Monday starts the sleepers on the site. Thank forkin gawd, amiright? On Patreon, I’m starting the rankings. Holy schnikes! The best Black Friday sale ever! You’re giving a discount? No, Random Italicized Voice, I’m just saying Black Friday sale because everyone else is. Ah, very cool.

So, the Houston Astros got a bad rap for, uh, rapping on a trash can. I get it. Think it’s pretty unfair, since everyone has tried to cheat. The “Yankees Letter” from Manfred couldn’t have been more ignored by The Sportswriters. People are fatigued by the cheating scandal. Fatigue is pronounced fay-tee-gay, it’s Italian. I get it, I don’t want to talk about it, after apparently talking about it. All I wanted to say is Astros seem to not get the respect they’re due in fantasy, and I think it’s because people are biased, whether consciously or not. The Astros’ pitching staff, for unstints, have they ever had a bad pitcher? Trying to remember. *pinching my temples* Who was their last bad pitcher? Odorizzi? Okay, they traded him away for pen help. Astros, also, don’t develop bad arms. It’s one lights-out guy after another. Framber Valdez, Lance McCullers, Cristian Javier, Jose Urquidy, and Luis Garcia were all developed in-house. Forrest Whitley is like their last big bust, and I wouldn’t completely write him off yet. That brings us to Hunter Brown. Maybe I’m giving him unearned credit, due to other guys who have come up for the Astros, but he went 20 1/3 IP in the major leagues this year with a 0.89 ERA and 9.7 K/9, 3.1 BB/9 and 2.78 xFIP, which came after completely housing the minor leagues: 106 IP in Triple-A, 11.4 K/9, 3.8 BB/9, and 2.55 ERA. Feels like a virtual lock to be yet another huge Astros arm. So, what can we expect from Hunter Brown for 2023 fantasy baseball?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

First off, let’s see what Prospect Itch has said about Eury Perez previously, “Best mechanics I’ve seen from a pitcher in the 6’ 8” range. Might have the best mechanics I’ve seen from an 18-year-old (now 19), especially his ability to repeat his calm, controlled delivery. His fastball gets up above the mid-90’s already, and his changeup stops and drops like a splitter. It’s a nightmare pitch the Marlins have had success teaching a lot of their young arms (see Cabrera, Edward). His curveball is plus too, but it’s the fastball/cambio combo that gives him an inside lane on becoming the game’s top pitching prospect after Grayson Rodriguez graduates, and I want to punch Grey so bad.” All right, not cool. My one question to Itch would be about, “Best mechanics I’ve seen from a pitcher in the 6’ 8” range.” Ha, you see a lot of pitchers in that range? Randy Johnson, Chris Young, Jon Rauch and…uh…Marcus Stroman standing on a stepladder? We (I) talk a lot about Lab Babies, in regards to hitters, but a 19-year-old, six-foot, eight-inch pitcher? Is this real life or is this Vincent Adultman on the mound? It’s real life? Okay, I know you’re saying that, but I barely believe you. What if he has one more growth spurt? Can he pitch in Tampa or will his head hit the ceiling? Does MLB have a rule against putting a foul pole on the mound because I think that’s what we might have here. So, what can we expect from Eury Perez for 2023 fantasy baseball?

Please, blog, may I have some more?