Me watching Lance McCullers:
The genius thing in that gif is the moment where Tom doesn’t seem like he knows which way to twirl the pool stick, looks about to mess up, and crack a smile, then spins and starts walking away. Scorsese likely had cleaner takes, but it brilliant that he uses a slightly flubby take because the character Vince is so full of himself even when he shouldn’t be. There were no such flubs in Lance McCullers’ start yesterday (6 IP, 1 ER, 7 baserunners, 7 Ks). May your God strike me down if this guy isn’t so butter that I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter sees him and says, “You are more butter than I can ever hope to be,” then I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter bows repeatedly, backing out of the room, saying, “Your butterness, I am not worthy.” As I said repeatedly in the preseason, I was thisclose to putting McCullers in my top 20 starters overall, but his health deterred me. Well, de-turd this, because he looks healthy and I wish I owned McCullers everywhere. If he throws 180+ IP, he could be a top ten starter. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Brian McCann – 1-for-3 and his 1st homer. McCullers? McCann? How many Mc’s must get kissed?
Hisashi Iwakuma – 6 IP, 2 ER, 7 baserunners, 2 Ks. Fun fact! When Hisashi is shopping at a Japanese supermarket, he grabs a bag of udon noodles and sassily says, “Don’t judge, udon know me!”
Seth Lugo – Has a slight tear of his UCL. For a pitcher, a slight tear of the UCL is like saying someone is slightly dead.
Joey Gallo – 2-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 1st home run. Did you see his shot? Gallo is boxed wine strong.
Delino DeShields – Didn’t start again. As our podcast guest and Top Chef winner, Harold, emailed me, “Delino is like a bad dry handjob in middle school.”
Carlos Santana – 2-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 1st home run as he hits leadoff. There’s a renaissance of stupid that’s been going around the league for the last year-plus with sluggers hitting leadoff. I get it, Santana has good oh-bee-pees, but you can’t tell me all of the runs lost through the year due to him knocking in less runners since he’s leadoff is better in the long run. Put Jose Ramirez at leadoff and move Santana down!
Carlos Carrasco – 5 2/3 IP, 2 ER, 5 baserunners, 7 Ks. I set out to watch Carrasco for the better part of his start, and I did until the pull of McCullers came over me — the McPullers? The sweet allure of McCullers — McAllurers? My crush, McCullers — McCrullers? Carrasco looked fine, overpowering a solid lineup, and got caught on a pitch that Gallo golfed to high heaven. Went in hoping Carrasco’s health was good, and it looked it.
Jose Quintana – 5 1/3 IP, 6 ER. More like Jose Hextana. Have you seen the White Sox park is now called Guaranteed Rate Field? More like Guaranteed Rake.
Tyler Saladino – 2-for-4, 1 run as he hit leadoff. Goodbye, whoever I have in my MI spot! Hello, Saladino! I had Raul Mondesi, but hitting ninth vs. leadoff is a no brainer. No brainers are my specialty!
Ian Kinsler – 2-for-3, 2 runs and his 1st home run. He celebrated his home run with a very refrained jog around the bases where he mumbled to himself, “Notice my boredom, my Latino brothers.”
JaCoby Jones – 1-for-4, 3 RBIs with his first career home run, and the season’s first slam (1) and legs (1). You know what else has a Hard C? The bat crack, baby! I just screamed that like I was Dick Vitale. Nothing changed from what I said on Monday about JaCoby, but sometimes guys who are really trying to prove they belong in the majors are worth a flyer for upside.
Nick Castellanos – 1-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 1st home run. Could this finally be the Year of ‘Anos?
Justin Verlander – 6 1/3 IP, 2 ER, 8 baserunners, 10 Ks. Ten strikeouts was his best ever for an Opening Day start. If he would’ve done it topless while covering his nipples with his arm, he might’ve made the cover of SI. (Sports website rule 17A, paragraph B: Always work Kate Upton or allusion to Kate Upton into any mention of Verlander.)
Justin Upton – 1-for-3, 1 run but left early with a knee contusion. You know who else’s knees hurt? Oops, sorry, filled quota in previous blurb.
Ronald Torreyes – 1-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 1st home run. First time I ever saw him was yesterday and Torreyes has an unmistakable look.
Chase Headley – 2-for-4, 2 RBIs and a slam (1) and legs (1). He had a three-hit game in his first game. Yup, you guessed it, hot schmotato!
CC Sabathia – 5 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 2 Ks. CC’s on a worse yo-yo diet than Oprah. Wasn’t he thin? I mean, he used to be fat, then thin, then fat, then thin, then…I’m getting a headache. Choose a weight range and stick to it, I can’t even with you.
Steven Souza – 2-for-4 as he hits leadoff vs. lefties. Or as some call them, alt-right.
Jake Odorizzi – 6 IP, 4 ER, 9 baserunners, 4 Ks. Well, he went against the Yankees. Wait, that means nothing anymore.
Junior Guerra – Expects to miss at least 6 weeks. Or as Edwin Starr would say, “Guerra, what’s he good for? Absolutely nothing for a month and a half.”
Adam Wainwright – 5 IP, 2 ER, 5 baserunners, 6 Ks. Stream-o-Nator was like, “Aw, heck no on Wainwright,” though I’m not sure it will ever like him.
Stephen Piscotty – Will be evaluated for a concussion today, after being hit in the head when running the bases. When he came to, trainers asked him where he was, and he said, “Piscotty doesn’t know! Piscotty doesn’t know!”
Jake Arrieta – 6 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 6 Ks. Sell! Kidding (not really).
Patrick Corbin – 4 IP, 2 ER. No fear, it’s always 47 months after Tommy John surgery when pitchers return to form.
Paul Goldschmidt – 1-for-3, 2 runs and his 1st homer. Au Shizz!
Jake Lamb – 1-for-3, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and his 1st homer. He’s a baaaaaaaaahd man!
Denard Span – Sat yesterday with a sore hip. Oddly enough, 500 miles away, Ben Revere booty bumped shut his refrigerator door and hurt his hip.
Brandon Crawford – 2-for-5, 2 runs and his 1st homer. Never really been a huge fan of Crawford. Though, I don’t love Eduardo Nunez (2-for-5, 2 runs), Buster Posey (0-for-3), Joe Panik (3-for-4, 2 runs), Gorkys– Actually, Gorkys Hernandez (2-for-5, 1 run, 4 RBIs) seems a’ight.
Johnny Cueto – 5 IP, 4 ER, 8 baserunners, 5 Ks. The Giants got out to a huge early lead, and Cueto cruised to the W at the Ivictory Coast.
Kenta Maeda – 5 IP, 3 ER, 8 baserunners, 4 Ks. Pretty unremarkable start, especially when you consider the opponent was the Padres, who take from the rich and return a poor team. A modern day Robin Hood and the Friars Suck.
Yangervis Solarte – 2-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 1st homer as he hit cleanup. On most other teams, he’d be in the cleanup slot only if the clubhouse was messy.
Clayton Richard – 8 IP, 0 ER, 7 baserunners, 5 Ks. Best start of the year and it’s from a Padres pitcher who is likely on waivers in every league? Fantasy baseball: because you really want an ulcer.
Sean Manaea – 6 IP, 4 ER, 7 baserunners, 4 Ks. Was a popular sleeper starter in the preseason for many people. He wasn’t for me. I don’t trust him. Well, I don’t trust skinny Samoans, in general, but I don’t trust Manaea for other reasons too.
Ryon Healy – 2-for-3 and his 1st home run. Bummed I didn’t draft Healy on any teams this year, think he could have a huge year and end up a top 50 pick next year. Fo’Healy.
Jed Lowrie – 3-for-4, 2 runs and his 1st home run, and two hits in the first game. Hot schmotato alert!
Ryan Dull – 1 IP, 3 ER and the blown save. Apparently, the C is silent when pronouncing closer for the A’s. So, one down, three more to go to solidify the A’s closer job. Who’s up next? Doolittle? Madson? Casilla again?
Cam Bedrosian – 1 IP, 0 ER and the save. Andrew Bailey pitched the 8th inning, so it looks like The Sciosciapath made the right move at closer. (Until he makes the wrong move.)
Gerardo Parra – 3-for-5, 1 run, 3 RBIs. Each time Parra was drafted in the last round of very deep leagues, I had the same reaction, “Damn, I forgot about him!” It’s like staircase wit for fantasy baseball.
Mark Reynolds – 2-for-4, 1 RBI. I mentioned this on the podcast yesterday, but after seeing Reynolds easily homer in the 1st game, I fell in love with the batty call. As a rapper might say, you shouldn’t make a batty call your wife, but I may hold Reynolds until Desmond returns (or until Reynolds goes 0-for-4 in two straight).
Travis Shaw – 2-for-4, 1 run, 2 RBIs, hitting .500 thru two games. As my underwear reads, beware the small sample size, but we could have a little schmotato action here.
Eric Thames – 0-for-1 as he sat out of the starting lineup yesterday. ‘Member when I only projected him for 415 ABs in the preseason and JB was like, “Dude, you’re dumb, he’s going to play every day.” How dumb is dude now, JB? How dumb is dude now?!
Zach Davies – 4 1/3 IP, 6 ER. Davies is working through The Kinks.
Josh Reddick, Kevin Kiermaier, Nomar Mazara, or Ryon Healy?
@breadnbutter: Maz
@breadnbutter: Maz
Eddie Felson: You’re some piece of work. You’re also a natural character.
Vincent Lauria: I’ve been telling her that. I got natural character.
Eddie Felson: That’s not what I said, kid. I said you are a natural character. You’re an incredible flake. But that’s a gift. Guys spend half their lives inventing that.
@Matt: Haha
Grey!!!
Excellent write-up.
a. Thankfully it’s still early in the season – are we still only in week 1!!! – so most of us can right the ship with a little effort.
b. Busy again so…….
John Rambo Quote of the day for April 5
Rambo: ‘This junk in my pocket! Here…here it is. That’s me, that’s Danforth, Westmore, Bronson, Ortega, and there’s Delmare, right in the back. We had to put him in the back because he’s so big, if we didn’t, he’d take up the whole picture!’
Cheers,
Ante
@Ante GALIC: Nice quote!
@Grey: Grey!
Thanks a lot!
a. Had a question. Could you ask Rudy if I could be appointed as Razzball Ambassador to Chad? My idea is to upload to you tube or vimeo an appeal to either Tracy Morgan (via a message with my boss who is his doppleganger and me) to be on the podcast or Kobe Bryant (via a message with my Senior Protection Officer and me). I swear to you, the guy who looks like Kobe Bryant is exactly the same with the exception that he’s one head shorter (about 12″). What do you think?
b. Basic script…This is a message for Kobe Bryant and all of his followers. As Razzball.com Ambassador to Chad and in the name of all at razzball nation, we would be thrilled to hear your voice on the razzball podcast. You can contact the razzball leadership on their twitter account or via their facebook page.
c. What do you think? Just an idea. I’d do it even without the Ambassadorship appointment in the name of all at razzball nation.
Cheers,
Ante
A. Great idea! Do you have a uniform with frilly shoulder pads like all great ambassadors/dictators?
B. Yes! Do this, please!
@Grey: Grey!
a. I don’t have any similar uniforms that ambassadors before me have used. I’ll do my best to present myself and represent razzball nation in the best light possible. For the Tracy Morgan video, I’ll have my boss say one of Tracy’s jokes (a clean one – rare to find – or just one that my French-speaking boss doesn’t understand too well).
b. If you saw this Kobe Bryant look-alike I swear you’d eat your shorts! The only thing missing in this guy’s repertoire is that wide, wide smile that Kobe has. But we’ll improvise somehow. Maybe I’ll have him try to spin a basketball with that Harlem Globetrotters song in the background (‘Sweet Georgia Brown, I think it is).
c. Ok, am on it.
Cheers,
Ante
A. This would be awesome, if you’re serious, I could get a video to Tracy B. Hilarious!
@Grey: Grey!
a. Am serious. Have the SNL episode from a few years back (I think 5-6 years) when he hosted. There will be goodies there for sure. Hope my boss will be up for it.
b. Have like 4 more pages to go of my 7-paged translation assignment from French to English. We have an office in Chad where no staff speak English, AT ALL!! And the information for our 2018 plan has to be keyed in to the system in English. Am sure in 50 years there will be an AI interface that will do it for them. Another office hired a translator to do their job for them (another office with no English speakers to speak of). Of course, the translation came out like Shakespeare translating Russian using a sea shell. The translator they hired didn’t speak the same ‘shop language’ that we do and a lot of what he translated came out garbled. Ga! So others are translating THAT offices work to. My friend from Chicago (who fell and hit her head and got malaria in the same week) solicited my help and I’m a sucker for that so, Frank voila.
Cheers,
Ante
A. You’re the best! B. This is amazing!
@Grey: Grey!
Off to supper. Completed my translation assignment!
Cheers,
Ante
Awesome!
my league is shallow so many good SP in FA.
Drop Jose Quintana for McCullers?
@Wilson:
Who else could you drop..Quintana can’t be your worst player, is he?
@Wilson: you definitely want McCullers. How many bench bats do you have?
I am in a 9-team shallow league so most starters are streamed.
I have bench bat and got McCullers already however just curious that who (McCullers or Quintana) is worthier to be owned. Kindly advise. Thoughts appreciated.
@Wilson: Agree w/ others, Quintana is not your worst SP
Grey sir! Fantastic recap.
McCullers, Cullers, Cullers… We should all own him if we went by your ranks. Are you trading him for anyone in your top 20 starters if we can get them? Say Duffy, Salazar, guys of that ilk?
And I’m definitely going home and watching the “Stand Up and Win” SNL clip tonight. An old favorite!
@JakeTPE: Sorry, I’m back! Grey, you had McCullers 28th and JB had him 27th.
I think my Salazar and Duffy suggestions are about right. But you had Gerrit Cole 20th. I’m not sure I’d give up McCullers for Cole right now.
(Stand Up and Win:
@JakeTPE: Nice clip!
@JakeTPE: I’d consider Salazar since both have injury concerns
man he’s such a character, a colossal flake. i had NO IDEA that was a scorsese movie.
@Aubrey Plaza’s Pillow: So good!
@Grey: and i’ve seen that movie many many times to not have known it was scorsese.
My exact re action when I picked up McCullers after someone already dropped him my league. Thanks for the advice Grey!
@Andrew: Nice!
If you had to keep either bird or beltre, who would you choose? I’ve got an agreement that if I include bird in an offer, I might be able to snag darvish. I’ve got power to spare and am looking to bolster my pitching.
@Mike: If you can get Darvish for either of those, go for it.
@Mike: Take Darvish
@Mike: Meaning Bird and who?
@Mike: Beltre
Thames droppable in a shallow league? I want nothing to do with a platoon unless it has Tom Berenger in it. Would you swap him for Castellanos?
@Pousse-Pousse: Yup
@JeF WiTh 1 F: But the Steamer projections!!!
@Pousse-Pousse: I’d go Castellanos
Cruise gifs always excited me! Mcullers looked great. All of his hits were infield
Are you starting Paxton tonight???
@J-Hova: Yes
@J-Hova:
I’d sit Pax tonight
SON has him at -7.3
@Malicious Phenoms: Fuck SON …start him
@JeF WiTh 1 F:
Dammit, I’m torn. Era and whip are so fragile early BUT i pay for the Mlb package and my wife goes to bed early so it may be worth starting since I’ll watch the whole game
@J-Hova: Ha
@J-Hova: Start’em!
@JeF WiTh 1 F: word
@peacecoast: Up
@JeF WiTh 1 F: Haha. Agree. I didn’t draft him to sit him out of the gate.
@Cram It: Yeah cant trust the machine yet …Hes starting for me on about 4 teams tonight…never thought to bench him.
@Cram It: What Cram said. Too early to be cautious or worried about ratios. Plus, what’s the fun in benching a sleeper you love?
@Duda Want to Build a Snowman?:
It’s also nice to get a bashing over with early. It makes me less gun shy for future streams. I remember a Rodon hammering early last yr that ruined my April whip & Era but opened my streaming flood gates.
@JeF WiTh 1 F: hahah
@J-Hova: I know, he looked awesome, better than the line indicates… I’d start him
Grey! Yeah, Carrasco looked fine, even good. A couple tight spots, where I wished I wasn’t watching him… but that just means he’s in mid-season form!
@Tigres: Agreed!
Boy am I glad some fool dropped McCullers last week.
@Mike: what are you in an 8 team league?
@peacecoast:
Nope, just probably an overreactive manager.
@Mike: Nice!
Love your Ray Davies reference there, Grey. I will remain forever by your side, to get your obscure late 70s/early 80s pop culture references.
@Rabbit: That was actually Rudy
Are we starting Salazar tonight?
@Anon:
I’d start him.
SON has Sal at 0.4
You gotta start your aces..
@Anon: Yeah
Have you cooled on Max Kepler???????
@Tehol Beddict: Never!
@Grey: He’s batting 2nd today. Let’s see what the young German can do.
He looks lost as of now
@Grey: But will you deal him for another talented Twins hitter and a starter you don’t want to own? It’s like Sophie’s Choice only you kill everyone.
I’m encouraged by Buxton’s 2nd 3-strike strikeout, he only swung twice
@Grey: Who knows he might swing at 3 pitches next time!
He actually hit the ball last time up, miracle!
@Ralph Lifshitz: good god you just can’t stop. I’m getting a restraining order. He has Kepler ranked higher than BUXTON and it’s been one game so why are you acting like it’s insane I’d think he’d accept the trade? Relax
@Tehol Beddict: You still don’t get the format 5 years later…..LT!
BTDubbs, Piscotty was hit 3 times during that inning:
https://twitter.com/BellyUpBetting/status/849439870091235330
@John Baeten: It was one of the craziest things I’ve seen in baseball!
@John Baeten: Haha
@Grey: Also – any idea why my actual name showed up on the first comment? It seems like since I purchased the stream-o-nator I need to log out frequently to appear as Felidia Featherbottom again.
You’re Felidia now
Laughed so hard (then cried a little) at the once-again-DeShit-not-DeShizz line. I smell a Top Chef guest column!
Also, how about the subtle line that Story had last night? 1 for 2 (single), 2 walks, 2 runs, 1 SB. That’s the kind of sneaky value that I think a lot of other people are overlooking, esp in OBP leagues. He’s not just homers and strikeouts!
@Duda Want to Build a Snowman?: I know, I wish I owned Story somewhere
@Grey: Literally have him in every league + team name thanks 100% to your writeups last year . . . a tasty tasty $11 keeper in one from trading for him after his momentary slump in early 2016, and managed to draft him in a new keeper this year, OBP OPS, for $23 ($26 in 2018 – not too shabby at all esp. with that format).
Sincerely,
Finding Story, A Story of Bryce and Fire, and Rougned One: A Star Wars Story
Haha, nice!
CJ Cron, Reynolds, or Para for 1B?
Who’s starting Bundy vs Toronto? I’m leaning no.
@bigbear:
SON has Bundy at -7.1.
Leave him on the bench for this one.
@bigbear: Cron and Bench for me
@bigbear: Take that back…I’d go with Parra for now (hes off to a hot start), Cron long term
@bigbear: Cron and Start’em.
@bigbear: Reynolds for a few… I wouldn’t start Bundy
Oh, also – Schoop is still over Saladino even though Saladino has a better lineup spot, correct?
@Duda Want to Build a Snowman?:
yes Paul 417B, Scoop over Saladino.
@Malicious Phenoms: Laugh every time I see this!
@Duda Want to Build a Snowman?: Go Schoop
@Grey: Is schooping a saladino kinda like tossing a salad?
Haha
@peacecoast: haha!!!
Swapped Nola for Gerrit Cole.
Thoughts?
@lackeydrinksonme: I’d want Cole
@lackeydrinksonme: Cole throwing 99 mph, should be good. Had a bad inning versus BOS when they bunted against the shift (wtf shift on Sandy fucking Leon) with two outs that then got away from him (homer Benintendi).
@lackeydrinksonme: Agree w/ F
Phelps or A. Bradley for SP-elig reliever I’m seeking for Ratios, Ks. Outside chance Bradley gets a look at the 9th inning if he keeps this up?
@jon: I’d give Bradley a shot, off to a nice start
@jon: I’d go Phelps
Start Garret Richards against Oakland?
@breadnbutter: If you aren’t starting him @ A’s when are you starting him? Start him or drop him.
@Spinoza: Start’em…Oakland stinks.
@Spinoza: Agree w/ others
Grey,
I am slaughtering this dude week one. Odor, Duffy, McCullers, SAGNOF waiting on closers, story stealing bags, even Vogt coming through. Thanks is all. Who is starting slow that I have to send trade offers for so far? Tanaka was mentioned but anyone else?
@Lt: I would check on the Cole owner in your league if you are looking to buy low on a panic. Bryant is 0-9 with 4K’s.
@Lt: Yeah, maybe Cole
@Grey: Slow [email protected]Lt: Slow down there, you can’t talk starting slow after 1 game.
Yeah
Current team
C Sanchez
1B Goldy
2B Odor
3B Rendon
SS Correa
OF Trumbo
OF Benintendi
OF Kiermaier (Desmond on DL)
UTIL Freeman
UTIL Pujols
My team is light on SB, if I could Trade Freeman for Tre Turner would that benefit my team or just hold with Freeman?
@WDH: Good trade but I’d rather hold freeman and get cheaper steals ..SAGNOF the Kiermaier spot in the OF…or maybe try and move Pujols for some speed.
@WDH: Agree w/ F
@Grey: Thank you both!
No problem
Hey Grey,
Who do you like tonight. Pineda or Taijuan Walker? Thanks.
@Schwab: Coin flip…I’d lean towards Pineda
@Schwab: https://razzball.com/streamers/
need to pick six starts for this points league where wins count as most pts..
skaggs vs OAK
Paxton vs HOU
Morton vs SEA
Happ vs BAL
Gausman vs NYY
Nola vs WAS
Lynn vs CHC
Fulmer vs BOS
Steven Wright vs DET
Eduardo Rodriguez vs DET
Nova vs ATL
thinking: Nova, Paxton, Happ, Gausman, Skaggs, Morton….???
@Nick: What does SON say? https://razzball.com/streamers/
So, with Lugo on the mend, is it Rafael Montero time or is he still not worth gambling on?
@Clint: Not worth it
@Clint: Agree w/ F
Grey in mid-season form. I look forward to January Grey every winter, but nothing beats the daily write-ups. Thanks for the cackles every morning. Do I actually start looking at Richard in a deep league(deep as in, he’s at the top of the wire along with Amir Garrett, Josh Hader, & James Shields)? Seems like a decent streamer at Petco at least, though his K-BB% frightens small children & pets.
More importantly, who are you riding with in your MI slot from here on out, Saladino or Tim Anderson? I have both…been figuring I’ll just play whoever is hot.
@Lunchbox: Thanks! I’d try Richard at Petco — Saladino
Good stuff as usual. No love today for Holland, though? Worth it to burn my #1 waiver on Bedrosian? Someone already dropped him in our 10 man league. My other closers are Melancon, Holland, Maurer. Thx.
@Synyster: Everyone who gets a save needs a mention? Weirdos.
I’d grab Cam.
@Synyster: I wouldn’t use your #1 waiver on him.
@JeF WiTh 1 F: Waiver priority is overrated IMO. Unless it’s a 15-team keeper league where you’re waiting for the next Trout to hit the player pool.
@Cram It: True but there will be some idiot who drops someone starting cold and he’ll be kicking himself for using it on a closer he really doesn’t need
@JeF WiTh 1 F: Oh, I don’t play with idiots so I’m not familiar with this facet. Makes sense t hen.
@Cram It:
Well this section really took off! I don’t know I think hes worth a mention as the new closer. No one really had him ranked as a great closer for obvious reasons but hes got two saves three games into the season. Small sample size but who knows. Anyways, thanks for all the comments fellas!
@Synyster: Right, so like I said, just take him!
@Synyster: Agree w/ Cram
Drop either Broxton or Kepler for Saladino?
Lackey worth a start today against the Cards (SON 3.6).
Danke!
@John Lott: 1. Hold (Would depend on roster make up though)………2. Start him.
@John Lott: Agree w/ F
Is Mazara going to bat 3 all year? is Mazara going to be a thing this year?
@John Lettiere: He was a thing last year, and no probably not. When Beltre comes back he’ll move down in the order a bit
@John Lettiere: Agree w/ Ryan
Is Mazara going to bat 3 all year? is Mazara going to be a thing this year? you like him better than Bruce?
Sup Grey,
Just dropped Skaggs to pick up Holland. Current closers are Jansen, AJ Ramos and Holland. Do I package and try to trade AJ Ramos and Kipnis for a mid- level pitcher or do I just keep AJ for more depth? What mid-level pitcher names come to mind that I should target to get for AJ Ramos and Kipnis? Also who do you think has higher upside Bundy or Daniel Norris? Thanks in advance.
@Illuminatty: Trade for a SP if you need one, better do much better than Bundy or Norris tho, McCullers would be my aim
Morning,
Would you move Hanley and A Reed for Gausman and Ozuna? Qs and Obp 15 teams, Hanley in my util spot also have Votto. Could use some Of flexibility and Ozuna qualifies in all 3. Also Reed likley droppable in a couple of weeks
@Nightpandas: Think you could do better for Hanley
@Nightpandas: Agree w/ F
Great GIF! Ha
Daily roster moves. Assuming all play today which one sits?
Cain @ MIN Broxton vs COL Thames vs COL
Also, are we starting GRichards @ OAK and Pineda @ TB?
@Huddy: Cain — I’d start them
Need closer help, can you rank in order of who is best to stash: Storen, Ottavino, Kelley, Street, Jones.
@armcurls: Jones is the best bet to have a full time closer job this season. Might be June before that happens tho.
@armcurls: Jones, Storen
Day 2 and Kepler is in the 2 spot. Going to be a roller coaster early season.
@sall goooood man: True but itsall gooooood man
@sall goooood man: Still early
Brother Grey, you’re the Folgers to my mornings!
I know its a bit early to be dropping players I drafted but in one league I ended up log jammed in OF (shallow league and I have Trout and Springer with only 4 OF slots).
Already can tell I need pitching/streaming slot. Who would you drop/sell low between: Buxton, Kepler, Khris Davis, Duvall? Or, do I just hold tight and see who gets hot?
@Marty Janettey_Was Set Up: Thanks! Trade one, maybe Davis? Only one with real value right now, I’d think
I said a mig-mop,
A miggy to the @Marty Janettey_Was Set Up:
http://i.imgur.com/MJPQi7A.gifv
Damn, how’d he not connect with that
@Roger Podacter: haha, I just had a horrible flashback of my childhood being crushed seeing the Rockers disband, seconded only to the death of Optimus Prime in the Original (and best) transformers movie.
No question today. Just wanted to say that I’m glad baseball season is here and I have my daily reading material. Keep up the great work.
@kenly0: Thanks!
Currently running Hunter Renfroe out there at UTIL. Would you drop him for Kepler or Travis Shaw? Thanks! I always appreciate your feedback.
@Sparty Scott: If you want a hot bat, but only a hot bat, you could grab Shaw, but then you might miss out on a 30 HR guy in Renfroe, assuming someone else grabs him and that he in fact hits 30 HR. The same could be said about Kepler. But maybe they both stay available so you could get the best of both worlds. Then again, maybe Renfroe and Kepler both suck, so you add Shaw until he cools off, pick up one of those guys, and then come back a week after that asking if you should pick up some other hot bat for either Renfroe or Kepler. All the while Shaw was actually the guy hitting 30 HR’s. It’s just madness I tell ya, madness.
@Cram It: Pretty cut and dry
@nick the dick: Exactly
@nick the dick: Ha!
@Cram It: it all feels like a wash. If that’s what’s available it’s a sign your league isn’t deep and there will be replacement bats all year long.
@J-FOH: That’s what I was saying, basically, “won’t matter”, in not so few words.
@Cram It: you should just give them a WMSL… won’t matter shallow league
@J-FOH: That’s a good one. I was going for confusing, though.
@Cram It: I actually do like helping people but with a less desirable tone
@J-FOH: I actually like helping people too. But I equally enjoy calling people idiots without actually saying “you’re an idiot.”
@Sparty Scott: Agree w/ Cram
Now every time I look at Deshizz Ima think about getting a dry dry handy. Kinda like what Odor’s little brother was pulling off as “Hazing”
@Ryan Kearney: OSB, Delino needs to play, talk to someone
Is Delino pronounced like it rhymes with Dino, the Flinstones “dog”, or Dyno, as in Dyno-mutt?
@El Famous Burrito: Haha
Fantasy Master Lothario,
Thanks again for all of the sleeper picks this year. My team is rocking out of the gate with Buxton (0-5, 3Ks) and David Peralta (0-9). I kiiid, I kiiid. I actually think Peralta has looked good at the plate even if the results haven’t been there and Buxton, well, I can’t quit him because I’m a Twins fan and who else am I going to own on that team?
Anyhoo, my question is about pitching. I was recently offered Taijuan Walker for Kenta Maeda and I rejected it. But, I’m thinking of seeing if he will still do it after one start of Maeda was uninspiring.
League is H2H Categories 5×5 and here is my staff:
Verlander
Salazar
Maeda
Lackey (like you, I own him everywhere. Please form a prayer circle to keep him safe)
Nova
D. Norris
Severino
K-Rod
Dyson
Maurererer
Would you do it? Or does it tip the scale a little too far to the risk side?
@Prettaaay, Prettaaay, Prettaaay, Pretty Good: Whoa, whoa, whoa. You’re going to hold Maeda’s 1st start against him, but not going to see what Walker’s 1st start brings? You’re living on the edge, my friend.
@Cram It: Hi Cram. Appreciate the comments. My thought was to get the trade done before the first start. If Walker goes out and dominates, the price will go up. (I guess on the other hand, if he gets rocked, I may be able to buy low)
@Prettaaay, Prettaaay, Prettaaay, Pretty Good: Hold
McCrullers? Sounds like McDonald’s is selling pastries now.
@Cale: Ha, yes!
Even in the A’s bullpen there is no C! Speaking of C’s great GIF. I need a fire emoji to put in here
@J-FOH: Such a great gif, I simply put it in here
@Grey: such a great movie. I think I saw that in the theater with my dad. And considering we had a pool table in my garage growing up yes I have done that gif scene more than once…. and broken the tips off some pool cues doing said scene… more than once.
Haha, love it!
Was that you that made the play on words with McCullers and Ice-T’s “Colors” last year, or am I more creative than I thought? Great write-up.
@Slimcompoop: It was me
@Grey: I figured:)
I just read your posting where you use Tom Cruise and the Balabushka pool cue as a lead in – I was in stiches and on the floor – why?? I am George Balabushka’s son, Gregory. My father made that cue. and they mention his name throughout the movie. I was there for part of the filming just in a watching capacity, Hope you enjoyed the movie. I do enjoy all of your postings.
best to you
Greg Balabushka
@greg balabushka: That’s awesome! Love that movie!
Dropped Strahm to pickup Dull, cause ya know thought he’d get a chance to close after a 3 K performance Monday.
FMFBBL
@The Great Knoche: Ouchies
I have this feeling that Buxton is going to totally suck this year.
@Pousse-Pousse: I have this feeling too, but we shouldn’t panic after one game
@Grey: He’s already struck out twice today on seven pitches in two at bats! He look terrible!
Awful
Drop deshields or grill forhammell? 9×9 league good on closers but grill could help win saves this week, deshields has upside already have rajai
@josh: Huh?
@Grey: want to get hammell back on the team but don’t wanna get burned dropping deshields drop him or grili
Delino
Man, rope-a-doping JB at the end there. Cold blooded.
@Hugman: The bigger they come!
@Grey: Whoah. TMI, dude!
*blushes*
In a 12 man league with total bases, OBP, and slugging percentage – trying to see what categories I need help in
Would you make any swaps ?
1b rizzo
2b Baez
3b Justin turner
Ss correa
Of polanco, Stanton, and springer
Util – ozuna, drury
Bench – Kiermaier
Dl beltre
I
Free agents – schimpf, Joseph, parra, kepler, semien
@Peanut: Kepler over Kiermaier
Max Kepler – our possibly Jewish mensch (forgot the glossary term!) batting in the 2 hole today, that’s more like it!
@ERad: Zimmermania
I stated Syndaguard and Arrietta already. Its limited innings so I dont have to start all my pitchers. I still have
Lackey vs st louis
Bundy vs Toronto
Norris vs CWS
Wacha vs Cin
Should I bench one for this matchup. Or just play them all.
@mike: if I start five starters a week ill be ok but if its not a bad matchup I could always use strikeouts and wins.
@mike: Lackey’s not throwing today — check SON https://razzball.com/streamers/
@Grey: still its season long stats. Limited games and innings. Should I start bundy. I think I will
Good luck!
Would you deal any/all of Cueto, Cole, or Carrasco for Polanco in a keeper league? I’m good on pitching and need help in the OF.
@Jon: Cole
@Grey: Should I take Carrasco and Cueto off the table, or would any be a good deal?
Yes
Hey there Grey!
Deep league question: it’s not quite an apples-to-apples comparison, but who do yo prier as a DL stash between Houston Street and Jorge Soler?
Thank you!
@Eric J Lyman: Soler
12 team H2H, need a backup at 1b. I’m looking at Reynolds, Duda, Morrison, or Shaw. Thanks, Grey.
@Filkarri: Reynolds for now
Grey! As always your the man, followed the rankings to a stellar team.
Need to get rid of one of these dudes to add another pitcher, 10 man standard points league
Outfield got a little thick…need to get rid of someone
For a reliever, I have…
Springer
JBJ
Buxton
Pederson
Duvall
Ozuna
Thanks maneeeee
@Mr. Trench: Ozuna, but should trade
Drop leonys or delino for gallo
Delino
Cubs v Cards and Tigers V Pale Hose, both games are rained out for today..
Sucks
@Grey:
Phillies v Reds 79% of rain at game time..
That’s so crappy
I’ve been trying to figure it out for years, but I still can’t, so can someone please explain the “Piscotty doesn’t know” joke to me? Sorry for having to ask, but it’s making me crazy.
Also, I just dropped Davies in exchange for Pomeranz in one league, because I like pitchers who make me unhappy.
@Murray:
@Abe Froman: Holy crap…I’ve never even heard of that movie. I do now, though. Thanks; my restless nights are over.
@Murray: Eurotrip. Very funny move with a very hot Michelle Trachtenburg.
Morning grey ! Hey in a 12 team al nl points league -1 for a K h2h would you rather have Kepler, parra or margot at least for this 1st month to see what happens. This is my current OF piscotty, polanco, odubal ? What do ya think. Thx grey. Cheers !!
Kepler
Only have one closer in 14 team h2h, need another solid one. Have been offered feliz for my Kepler (6th OF), selling too low? Better to ask for K-rod or Robertson? or hold?
Thanks
I’d take Feliz, other two are slightly better, so can try for them first
“Davies is working through The Kinks.”
You beautiful mustachioed bastard. You know fantasy baseball, but your true talent is the art of the pun combined with deep pop-culture references that border on alienation of most of your audience. *slow clap*
Ha, that one was Rudy
@matthasideas: This is for any of you fantasy baseballers who don’t know much about The Kinks. Go and listen to their masterpiece album “Arthur” for starters. It will make your life better. After that try Village Green Preservation Society. The Kinks are sadly one of the most underrated bands of all time.
>Jake Arrieta – 6 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 6 Ks
The stat line of the beast!
Haha
Looking to fill utility spot and wire very thin Reynolds or Parra ? Thanks O’Wise 1
Reynolds
JB is sooooo sad about Thames and Davies. What’s going to happen when Broxton is hitting .213 come May 15th?
Don’t forget the painting he’s working on, its working title, The Sadness of Guerra
@Grey: The next in line to his previous masterpiece “The Duality of Braun”
Who can forget his series of Hallmark Mother’s Day cards featuring Bill Hall
@Grey: Mom you’re the utility of my heart!
10 years later and she’s still wondering why I drafted Hall all over in 2007.
Who can forget his one panel comics starring a vegetarian Prince Fielder?
@Grey: I prefer his Cecil Cooper fresco in Robin Yount’s Turkish Bath House.
I like his Gorman Thomas country-western belt he wore during his Texarkana phase
@Grey: damn I missed this but I would say: our lady of Guerra fresco in his master bathroom
@Grey: Rob Deer “Art of the Mullet” Wig Display on showcase next to his Nascar commemorative plates.
Don’t forget how he holds his paintbrush, just like Craig Counsell
I have too many bench bats for what I like to do (which is stream)
I have one streaming spot I used for cc sabathia, and I like his second start.
so. Who do I drop for mccarthy tomorrow:
Rajai Davis
Ender Inciarte
Yuli Gurriel (only 3b elgible in yahoo have him behind franco and frazier)
Aaron Judge
Start 4 outfielders I own Trout, Marte, Piscotty, Kepler that I don’t want to drop.
(keep going with the scotty doesn’t know references, I love that movie)
Rajai
Great article!!
I’m currently going without a catcher in my deep h2h points lg and options are thin- D’Arnaud Zunino Castro Cervelli Hedges avail and none may be impactful. To add any of them I would have to drop a nice bench piece, either Haniger Morton Snell or ERod to pick one of them up.
What’s your advice?
Lose Morton for Hedges
I traded J.D. Martinez and Tulo for Jean Segura… right or wrong? :P
Sounds fine
Anos means anuses.
Even better!
Might I suggest a Razzball sponsored contest where commenters attempt to reenact Tom’s scene with the pool cue?
Haha, love it!
Here we go boo, our first installment of deGrom vs Grey tonight…get your popcorn ready
I’m sure deGrom will be fine if he’s on the field, staying on the field is my concern
@Grey: That’s my concern with every pitcher lol
True, but more so for deGrom (for me, at least)
@JeF WiTh 1 F: @Grey: “Does he pitch for the Mets? Then, he’s probably hurt” Winston Churchill
@Ralph Lifshitz: That sums it up
I remember that quote in The Crown
Rev. Run’s youngest has serious flow.
https://www.facebook.com/tripletheseven/videos/1759823470953495/
You thought he didn’t?
@Grey: The oldest is garbage, so I just assumed. Bad assumption. He might have had the best verse in the whole cipher, even if the Kurpt impression Cube’s youngest did was entertaining.
True this
Brandon Drury or David Peralta ROS?
standard league
Peralta
drop Dry handy Deshizz for Parra?
drop Mitch Moreland for Mark Reynolds?
drop Naquin for either Pearce, Jankowski or Grossman? ( and if so, which one? )
Thanks in advance for advice and thanks in reverse for my last draft on Sunday morning ( Got McCuellers for 15$ and would’ve kept going thanks to the love he got on rankings ) Also have Odor in that league. Who needs deodorant when you have Roughned Odor? MVP MVP MVP !!!!
Delino for Parra — Haha
Loving all these “Should I drop player X (drafted in the 7th round) for Jed Lowrie-type ” questions. First week jitters!
Haha
Bye Felidia!
@Grey: From Blackstool, I’m charmed, I’m sure.
HA
10 team Yahoo H2H (Max Acquisitions per Week: 6)
Batters: R, H, HR, RBI, AVG
Pitchers: W, L, SV, K, ERA, WHIP, QS
(1) C: Martin
(1) 1B: Rizzo
(1) 2B: Odor
(1) SS: Semien
(1) 3B: Rendon
(3) OF: Harper, Springer, Bradley Jr.
(2) UT: Abreu, H. Ramirez
Bench: Longoria
(1) DL: Rodon
(3) SP: Carrasco, Duffy, McCullers
(2) RP: Betances, Johnson
(4) P: Lackey, Gausman, Walker, J. Gray
Bench: (Ray, Hammel, Hellickson, Nova)
Available SPs: Iwakuma, Pomeranz, McHugh, Garcia, Lynn, Snell
Available RPs: Kelley, Bedrosian, Rodney, Grilli, Neris, Benoit, Street
With Rodon on the DL would you use the extra spot to pick up any of the pitchers above? Thinking of streaming that spot or trying to chase saves…
Bedrosian
@Grey: Thanks Grey!
Also I know you said I don’t need to trade yet but I want to try and float some offers out there before people get to attached to guys on their team. So considering I’ll probably be light on SBs and my SS position as me worried I was wondering which player(s) to bundle with Semien since I know this bench bat thing is going to bug me heading into our first H2H week next week.
1) There’s a team with Villar at 2nd, Russell at SS, and Pedroia and Andrus at UTIL and Travis on the bench. He’s only got Jose Ramirez at 3B and his OF is Mookie, Melky, and O. Herra. I wanna make him an offer and see if he bites so who should I trade away for which of those guys?
2) Also anyone from my team you’d trade with Semien in return for maybe Segura to help my SS position?
1. Longo for Villar 2. Nope
I just referred to him as McKKKKKKKullers last night (let’s hope he always has more than 3K’s a night or that might be taken the wrong way). The new GF was at Camden Yards for Trumbomb’s walk off on opening day. #jealous#keeper!
Haha… You dating Caren Ripken?
@Grey: HAHA! Nailed it. Yeah she’ll be moving out here permanently after the summer. I’m hitting up the O’s/Jays series the weekend before Memorial Day (1st time at the Yard) . She’s been out here 4 times already, so I figured I should go out more than once. HA!
When she comes out here, we’re gonna have to double date!
@Grey: She was just out here when you were in NY, she’ll be back on the 20th-25th. Let’s do it!
@Teddy Heater: Didn’t get a chance to ask you about my 12 team yahoo draft 6×6 holds and OPS. We reset the keepers, so it was a fresh draft
C-NA
1B-Rizzo
2B-Odor
3B-Rendon
SS-Semien
OF-T Turner
OF-Stanton
OF-JBJ
Util-Pujols
Util-Hanley
Bench-Buxton, Deshields, Mazara, Gyorko, T Shaw
Carrasco
McCullers
Salazar
Gray
Shoemaker
Puke Soup
Giles
Treinen
Storen
Glover
Jenmar
Does your girl play fantasy?
Team looks solid on hitting, risky, but decent on pitching, hopefully they hold their shizz together
@Grey: She does DFS, but I’m teaching her the ropes for seasonal. Remember she’s an O’s fan, same league:
C-Wellington
1B-Abreu
2b-Dozier
3b-Donaldson
SS-A Russell
OF-Blackmon
OF-Trumbo
OF-Polanco
Util-Franco
Util-Piscotty
Bench-Kepler, Grichuk, Travis
Cmart
Gausman
Quintana
Gsellman
Glasnow
Wheeler
Urias
Britton
Maurer
Neris
O’day
Givens
Yes you can pick time and place
I like this team a little bit better, because the SPs are a little safer up top, but both teams are solid
Sounds good! We pick the place this time
Hey Grey! Draft results from last night. 12 team 6×6 (standard with OBP+QS)
C-Molina (19-220)
1B- HanRam (6-69)
2B- Villar (4-45)
3B- Seager (5-52)
SS- Story (3-28)
OF- Harper (1-4)
OF- Marte (2-20)
OF- Bradley Jr. (9-100)
Util- Carlos Santana (8-93)
Util- Duvall (13-148)
Bench – Jose Peraza (14-165)
SP- Maeda (7-76) Salazar (10-117) Hill (11-124) McCullers (12-144) Walker (15-172)
Ray (20-237) Hammel (21-244)
RP- Kintzler Feliz Holland Casilla
DL- McHugh Tillman
Missed on a lot of targets by 1 or 2 picks. Votto Odor and Benintindi went one slot ahead when I was ready to take them. Ran it through the war room and with Duvall as a starter, it scores out with 247 HRs, 846 RBIs and a 271 avg. With Peraza in the lineup, the average goes up a bit and he puts me at 173 steals. War room doesn’t include OBP, but going on 2016 stats and Peraza as a starter, my lowest OBP player is .341 (Story). I missed on my high OBP targets in the 2nd round (Votto and Freeman) so hopefully only having Duvall as a low OBP guy will keep me competitive there.
Looks like a solid team, I don’t have any qualms with your hitting, your pitching should be fine, but it’s riskier than your hitting…
@Grey: Thanks Grey! Yahoo’s post draft analysis said it was the worst team in the league by a large margin…haha. I’m not sure how they reach a total score, but my team had a 58 and the best team had a 93. No other team was below 65. I think they score all your bench hitter stats and most teams ended up with 4-5 bench bats. I’m always happy to get your seal of approval as it is all that truly matters since the one true path to success runs through your rankings.
We have 8 moves per week so I plan on streaming pitchers. Hopefully I can take Ws Ks and QSs most weeks with that strategy. My early pitching targets, (Verlander, Carrasco and Martinez) all went crazy early, Verly in the 3rd, Carr in the 4th and Martinez in the 5th so once those guys were gone I decided to wait to try and load up on middle tier guys. I had planned on grabbing at least 1 solid closer but missed on Familia and Melancon by a couple of picks. Hopefully I can grab someone in the first few weeks as jobs are in flux.
Yeah, those post-draft analysis things by ESPN and Yahoo are silly
Grey would you drop Skaggs for Jacoby Jones in a 12 team h2h?
Sure
joe ross, Zach wheeler,or Liriano ROS?
standard league
Ross
You be such a giant hater! Ha.
Haha, much hate!
Your “slightly dead” comment regarding Lugo made me instantly think of Miracle Max ” It just so happens that your friend here is only mostly dead.” And as a Carrasco owner, I too was pleased with last nights performance against a tough Rangers lineup.
Question for ya Grey, who do you like better as my back up SS between Anderson and Saladino? I’m a little light on speed(roster is below) so I had added Anderson but with Saladino leading off, and your comments above, I’m curious which you view as the better fit for me. Appreciate your thoughts…now have fun storming the castle.
10 team ESPN HTH 5X5 w/OBP and QS
C Sanchez
1B Rizzo
2B D. Murphy
3B K.Seager
SS Russell
OF Trout
OF Springer
OF Inciarte
UTL 3B/OF Sano
UTL DH Morales
UTL 2B/OF Zobrist
BN SS Anderson
DL OF JD Martinez
P J.Paxton
P T.Walker
P Carrasco
P Duffy
SP A.Nola
SP I.Nova
RP Giles
RP J.Johnson
BN RP Holland
BN SP G.Richards
BN SP Snell
BN SP Eickhoff
DL SP Rodon
Saladino
@Grey: Thanks, I really thought you’d say Anderson, so glad I asked.
No problem
Grey I followed you pitcher ranks pretty well, Jumped on Yu in the 4th got Quintana, McCullers and Paxton later as well.
Two quick questions with that
Im low on RP so would it be worth it to trade McCullers and Paxton for a stud rp like Chapman, Miller, or Betances.? ……… SV HD league
also a side question.
Is it worth the risk to trade Trea Turner and Marte Partay for Arenado?
It’s a legit trade and I need a power boost and have depth in the SB slot, but I don’t know about giving up that much
Don’t trade for an RP… Hold Trea
@Grey:
Works for Me and thanks for the advice.
I try and follow a lot of your shiz, where I even got screwed slightly by Delino Desomething last year. Which in turn made me crack up on some of your posts this year. I’m buying in on the McCullers and Yu train this year though… at that it didn’t take much convincing for me on Yu
Keep up the good work, I look forward to your articles in the morning for a good laugh and info.
No problem, thanks!
Streaming Robbie Ray tomorrow vs SF?
Or
Snell vs. TOR
Tanaka already destroyed my ratios this week so I’m just trying to pick up K’s and wins.
Thanks!
@PED Inc: Ray 4 me
Ray
As a writer, you should begin to understand the difference between “less” and “fewer” – otherwise, great work as always.
@Jerry: Agreed….Please work on that Grey so we see less or is it fewer of these comments.
Haha
@JeF WiTh 1 F:
Not sure if you’re grey’s forum bodyguard or what but it’s a simple critique that’s easily fixed.
@Jerry: It’s a fantasy baseball blog, relax.
@Jerry: Yes i am his bodyguard…the pay sucks though due to the fact the little guy doesn’t have much body to guard.
Okay
@Jerry: This has always bugged me but I could never figure out why. His use of less vs fewer is like a splinter in my brain.
Imagine the looks I get when I ask, where’s the nearest topfewer bar?
@Grey: I feel like that would be the most polite way of talking Lena Dunham back into clothes.
Haha, awesome
Kepler or Maz ros. OPS league
Maz
I think I perfected the gray drafting strategy I know why you rank people high and exactly where to draft em loving my team so far
C cerveli
1b goldy
2b odor
3b rendon
Ss segura
If Hanley
Of springer, trumbo, maz, inicarte
Utility travis,santana
Bench rajai
P mcullers, pineda, lackey, gray, tajuan, hammell, gsellman
Rp jansen,melancon,neris,giles,betances, grilli
Nice!
Did I just read that Ante is trying to have his Tracy Morgan doppelganger boss dress up in old military garb and tell jokes as Tracy Morgan, all while representing Razzball?
@Dr. Kenneth Noisewater: Why does it seem like a bad idea to have a black guy dress as another black guy for white people’s entertainment?
Could be worse, could be a white guy dressing up as a black guy
@Ralph Lifshitz: @Grey: https://media.giphy.com/media/wOTijsQlvocKs/giphy.gif
@Grey: Bill O’Reilly did that for a Reenactment of his forth coming book “Killing Malcolm X”
@Ralph Lifshitz: Ted Danson finds this offensive.
@Dr. Kenneth Noisewater: The funny thing is O’Reilly wore a James Brown wig.
@Ralph Lifshitz: Oh god, I thought you were joking.
Fake news!
Yes!
Finally getting around to catching up on Netflix joints. I’m in Stranger Things right now, what should be next?
@nick the dick: 2 new Chappelle stand-up specials. First one is great.
@Dr. Kenneth Noisewater: Yeah definitely getting around to that. Just watched Louie’s new one, incredible, he’s my fav
@nick the dick: Yes! Forgot that came out. That might be getting watched by me tonight.
I’ve been slacking on Netflix originals, just finished Stranger Things myself. I mentioned before….big TV month in April. Better Call Saul, Fargo, Veep, Leftovers, Archer.
@Dr. Kenneth Noisewater: That’s a crew of heavy hitters coming back.
@Dr. Kenneth Noisewater: The Louie is so good Noisey, square yourself away…..can’t effin wait for Fargo and Saul!
2nd one not so much?
@Grey: I watched them back to back, so maybe I was spent on stand-up. Watch the second one first and see if you like it better, ha.
I watched the 1st a few days ago… It was decent, not seeing the hype
@Dr. Kenneth Noisewater: Which one is “he rapes but he saves, and he saves more than he rapes”?
1st one
@Grey: I’m not sure I even remember jokes from the 2nd one.
Now I’m not in any hurry to watch the 2nd… You really love 1st one like everyone seemed to?
@Grey: Think I was just excited to see new Chappelle stand-up in general. So yeah I was hyped for the first one.
Yeah, me too…Wasn’t bad, it was just aight
There were a few parts I found myself actually laughing. I thought it was good, but agree, not amazing or anything.
I liked the 2nd half better when talking about transgenders, the 1st half I almost turned off; 2nd half made up for 1st half tho
@Grey: Hey Grey. FWIW I thought the 2nd was funnier.
Ah, cool… I plan on watching it, I was just slightly underwhelmed by the 1st
@Grey: Yeah. Felt same about the 1st
Cool, good to know!
Not The OA! God no! It’s awful! Hmm… Im watching Peaky Blinders right now, it’s kinda badass, tho I can’t understand half of what they say
@Grey: Eh I feel too backed up, don’t think some marble mouthed Brits is the way to go even though I hear good things. You guys endorse Black Mirror right?…go watch Louie CK’s new standup
Damn, you are behind yeah, watch Black Mirror
@Grey: Grey, mentioned this before to you. Must use close captioning. Accents are crazy.
Dropped Kepler for Parra today. I’ll keep my monocle on him in case he heats up. (I’m keeping Delino in my back pocket because I’m worse than you with him, AND I NEED SAGNOFF. BOTH KINDS!)
You gave up already? Oh, Hugman…
@Grey: I’ll snatch him up again the second he has a good game. Unless Delino is getting playing time and leading off. I need what speed and runs more than what Kepi provides. DeShizz is leading off today!
Hopefully Delino goes 5-for-5 w/ 4 SBs and leaves nothing up to chance
12 team H2H 6×6 OPS
Should I use my #1 waiver on McCann? I have Rupp.
Bleh
I’m two episode’s into S-Town and have zero idea what to expect next. For all the familiar names and places of Crimetown, this is the complete opposite. S-Town might as well be about Estonia, totally foreign country. Crazy to think that’s in the same country I’m in.
BTW hidden bar behind a tattoo parlor in rural Alabama, sounds exactly like every KKK club house I’ve ever imagined.
I love they named the hardware store Triple K, nothing to read into that!
@Grey: Just 3 bros w/ K names. Maybe their dad was Roger Clemens?
Yeah, nothing weird there at all!
@Grey: I’m guessing John B Macklemore has something going on. If that murder didn’t happen something REALLY F’d up is.
You finished the 2nd episode? Was a gut punch right?
@Grey: NO! I haven’t finished yet. I’m about to, only about 25 minutes in.
Cool, won’t say anymore
C- Perez
1B – HanRam
2B – Odor
3B – Donaldson
SS – Correa
OF – Marte
OF – Buxton
OF – Duvall
UTL – Trumbo
Bench – Kepler
Bench – Pujols
Bench – Grichuk
Would you drop any of these for (SS) Semien, (SP) Gio G, Hellickson, Bauer, Hammel, J Zimmerman, Glasnow, Snell, Wheeler, Musgrove, or Foltynewicz?
Nah
@Grey: Thank you
No problem!
Bench Polanco vs Sale today?
I have game limits in this league.
No
Hey, ‘member when Matt Strahm was good? ‘Member? That was awesome.
Rough go of it against the Twins, finally got Buxton off the schneid too!
@Grey: 6 runs in .2 IP over 2 days? C’mon!
Yeah, enjoy your Buxton/Broxton duo. Together they may hit .260…if you ADD both of their averages.
I love how their teams are batting them in lineup spots like they’re good… Gives them a chance to K more!
@Grey: No pressure, kid. Swing away!
Haha
DeShields is in the lineup today so maybe he’ll be like a GOOD dry handjob in middle school.
Yeah, I remember those
@Sky: Ahhh…Memories
@JeF WiTh 1 F: more like ‘ahhhhOWWWW!’ memories but yes.
@Sky: LOL
Drop Cain for any of Kepler Buxton?
No
Texas Rangers are now officially trolling Razzball with DeShields in the lineup. Here’s hoping he goes nuts and steals the gig…before we need to make weekly waiver decisions.
Hope so
12 team 6×6 (OPS/QS)
Both Buxton and DeShields were dropped.
I currently have Kepler.
Which of these three would you roster?
@bobbo: or drop Thames for buxton or deshields?
Buxton
@bobbo: Drop Thames before Kepler
Did you see Springer get thrown out by a *double-clutching* Zunino yesterday? Springer will never steal 20 bags; well, maybe if he attempts 40…
Ha, nah, missed it
Was going to update you on the huge Buxton Off The Schneid News! But alas, I see that you’re all over it. Helluva performance from our boy. Garnering no substantive counting stats from the 3 spot in the lineup, when your squad scores 9 must be incredibly difficult to accomplish. I’m actually hoping that he can draw a walk. It might lead to a stolen base. Or maybe, just maybe a run scored. But, despite the 3 SOs, I’ll take the hit. He’s Off The Schneid!
A solid infield single!
@zombie: On the bright side Deshizz is in the line up tonight
Trade Altuve/Lance Lynn for Goldy/Maeda?
@JP: or Altuve/Edwin for Goldy and Miggy?
Goldy
Goldy, not close
@Grey: Thanks, I’d be offering, so if I revised it to offer Hanley/Altuve/Edwin for Goldy and Miggy, would that push it closer to even?
Bit much now
@Grey: okay, thanks
No problem!
Ok I’m now calling Deshields The Dentist (ya know DDS).
I predict 1 hit, 1 bb, 2 sb, 1 run and he’s on the road to every day abs
Hope so, but I have to admit my enthusiasm has waned in two days
@Grey:
That’s good because whenever you are enthusiastic he pets dogs.
Pets dogs is a very nice euphemism I’m trying out.
Be patient on The Dentist this year. Spidey sense holdin thumb up.
@OaktownSteve:
However, Buxton I do not like at all. He looks like Oil Can Boyd’s skinnier cousin.
His strikeouts have got to be the ugliest things I’ve ever seen… And I was watching some ugly Ks from Broxton the other day!
I hope your Spidey sense is right on, but Rua and Profar will play at least twice a week which hurts Delino, they need to commit to the Dentist
@Grey:
I think The Dentist is going to play his way into the every day job. Run is a 4th AAAA type. Profar has not shown anything.
I think you were just a year early. Could see a lite Dee Gordon season. Failing last year was good for him. His dad was an MLBer so he’s probably a little entitled. I like that the Rangers are making him work and grow
I love the narrative, and love The Dentist, just hoping it happens while trying not to put the cart in front of Carlos Lee
karns got jacked up and i have no idea why he was even used (similar to gsellman the other day, except gsellman still few enough days off to still start), WAS scheduled for saturday.
1. 16 team h2h with QS. 4 moves per week, 3 left this week. hold or start streaming from: perdomo/kuhl/koehler or just grab a.bradley for when he might get corbin’s job
2. 20 team QS dynasty h2h with max 6 SP. have karns (and of course was in lineup in this one), or could stream from: kuhl/brault/m.gonz/m.perez/h.santiago/gibson. K/9 here too
3. same league as in 2. holds, and relief appearaces and relief wins here. which 2 out of hembree (used in 8th last time for a hold),
gearrin (possibly most talented of group, used in semi-leverage thus far NOT the LR he’s listed as in rosterresource)
ross
mcgee (i had him till dunn stole his job for 2 straight games, and dunn was obtained while i had mcgee starting so i couldn’t do anything about it)
jc ramirez (probably best role right now)
l.hendricks (many ahead of him but possibly most talented on list and axford just went down)
sipp
Yeah, saw that…. 1. Hold for now 2. Hold 3. Hembree, Ramirez
Rank for holds gregorson Harris romo
Thanks
That rank looks fine
I was going going to start delino over healey what do you think? I need some speed. Not real bad.
Should I start bundy tonite?
I don’t know who Healey is
@Grey: You’re a prick ha ha
Ha, what? I don’t… Headley? Ryon Healy?
@Grey: Lol..didn’t even think of Headley..Just saw Healy spelt wrong and thought you were busting balls…now it’s not as funny
Is a Glasnow pick up meh in order to drop one of Tim Anderson Broxton Thames if you already have solid pitching (but have daily roster moves within H2H week)?
I’d hold for now
Dumb things managers do:
Power bats hitting leadoff, closer by committee (a night after a guy gets a save with a flawless inning), closer by committee that’s not (theres no way it’s not Bedrosian), sending slow runners against good arms when there’s 2 outs and your team is rallying, and finally, WHO THE BLEEP TOLD GEORGE SPRINGER HE WAS A BASE STEALER?!?
I love me some springer – helped me win my league last year, and you know I have as much man-love for him as I do fat from eating pizza, (ok, maybe not that much, but it’s close) but got damn he sucks on the base paths. It was maddening last year and even worse this year. He’s either terrible at reading pitchers or he’s got a tell that other teams are picking up on, because he was supposed to be a 30-20 threat, and he’s on pace for what, 152 CS? That is simply not acceptable.
On another note, thanks god for McCulters. I was crushing on him hard and his ADP made me take several SP before him that I liked worse, and every time I had to hold my breath. It would be nice he he’d pitch a little deeper, especially when he’s only thrown 88 pitches in a 1 run game, but I understand it’s early and there are health concerns, so I’ll count my blessings that they hung on for the W and will hope for better run support.
I want Springer to attempt steals since I own him
@Grey: that green light’s gonna turn Red awful quick if he keeps running into outs.
Sorry to pee on your parade while you’re eating Cheerios. Wait, how’s that go?
Anyway, at least he’s getting on base – my Marte hasn’t gotten a hit yet and Enciarte has struck out 137 times already.
Good luck!
Has Moistasskids been picked up in those leagues yet?
Ha, yup
Jason Castro for Frankencatcher today in 2 Catcher OBP league. 0-0, 2 R, 4 BB. Nice!
Haha
I really hope deGrom stays healthy, he looks really good..3 up 3 down in the 1st, 2 K’s and throwing 96 to 98 with ease. He just had a nerve issue last year and had it fixed…he clearly looks better than what I saw last year
Yeah, he looked good last year too until the wheels (tendons) fell off
@Grey: Nah he was off from the start of spring training last year, never showed the velocity from the start.
@JeF WiTh 1 F: He’s fine. The Mets lose 3 pitchers a year to major injury. Last year was Degrom, Harvey and Wheeler, this year it will be Lugo, Matz and Syndergaard.
Degrom is fine.
Haha
@The Great Knoche: I agree deGrom is fine…don’t forget they lost Matz last year too….Stop jinxing the Mets you two
Ha!
@Grey: we are going to get a deGrom no hitter tonight
Adonis looked safe
@Grey: 6 up 6 down
@JeF WiTh 1 F: through 3..5 ks..no hits..
@JeF WiTh 1 F: Aaaand there goes that
Jinxer!
Yeah, I was watching him… He is damn good if healthy
Grey just finished my draft a day before the season started. 14 team head to head, 10 player keeper league(Only 4 can be a pitcher). MY line-up consists of. C-Vogt, 1B C.Santana, 2B Odor somehow he lasted until the 11th round. 3B Arenado, SS- Semien, OF, T.Turner, Blackmon and Sano. Utility- J.Abreu picked in the 13th round. Bench is Profar, Zunino, Kepler and T.Anderson.
Sp- Verlander, C.Carrasco,Bundy, Maeda Roark, McHugh,Liriano,S.Miller and J.Garcia. RP.Kintzler, Bedroaisan and Feliz.
FA pick up is $5 per claim. What do you think of my team?
You look low on AVG, speed and I don’t understand owning Profar… Pitching looks stronger than hitting, until about Roark
@Grey:
Profar was a auto pick, I can also put McHugh on the DL and have a free claim. Any body worth streaming until he is healthy. C.Richard,CC Sab. M.Boyd,Volquez,Brett Anderson,Tomlin and Kohler, any of these guys get your fancy going.?
Nope
If I had to, Edinson
Dozier Happ for Shoemaker Stro?
@rick: Dozier
Dozier
10 team h2h redraft
Would you give up Segura, Melancon, and Britton to get Springer and Villar? I need Runs and Speed. I could work SAGNOF with it being such a shallow league. Pull the trigger?
thanks grey!
ryan
@ryanoger:
Do it!
@ryanoger: Yes….GRIMEY!!!
Sure
@Grey:
So now I think I can move either Britton or Melancron/Segura for Springer and Cespedes still do that right? and I hopefully can unload the other closer for a SS?
Possibly trades I know…don’t eye roll my ass!
@ryanoger:
Possible*
@ryanoger: I’d still do it and give him Meloncon….You’ll get a better SS with Britton IMO.
@JeF WiTh 1 F:
Good deal that’s what I’m trying to work, trying to get Xander or Villar for Britton. Thanks Jef!
@ryanoger: Villar first for me
Sure
The pitchers I drafted decided to pitch batting practice… the disasters so far:
-Quintana
-Maeda
-Gray
-Pineda (so far tonight)
-Dyson
I’m currently praying that Roark settles down
@William Hung: other than Pineda, I feel your pain.
Telling you, this first week is murder
@Grey: it really is…thank God for McCullers last night..even though Dull threw some salt on it for me
Yeah been getting killed early
@Grey: My league counting losses just killing me
Ouch
@William Hung: Yes you are Fucked more than the average man this week
Nomar!
Nice!
@Stephen Lyon: mazouza
Bruuuuuuuuuce!!! LOL
Ha
@JeF WiTh 1 F: lets say Bruce does have a decent April and then May and the Mets are either tied or within +/- 2 games of the Nats for first… do the Mets really go ahead and trade Bruce? I feel like the Mets are going to have a tough decision if Bruce is playing really well. The worst thing is if they do trade Bruce for a pitcher and Conforto shits the bed like he did last season…
@William Hung: I think Conforto will need really good but yeah risky…It all depends on the needs at the deadline and how much they can get for him…Could see him going for a really good set up guy
@JeF WiTh 1 F: *be really good
Too chicken to start Bundy tonight vs. the Jays in Camden.
SONOVABENCH! Luckily I did start Pineda.
FMFBBL
Haha
10 team AL only with OBP over AVG and total bases added
C vogt
1B miggy
2B segura
3B mostsuckass
SS correa
MI miller
CI moss
OF trumbo/k.davis/cargo 2/rajai
util s.smith
BN kim
NA zimmer
drop kim for any of joyce/asche larry/almonte, all of these good side platooners. could also in future maybe stream good lefty bats on lefty days (7 moves per week).
Nah
Great notes as usual Grey, but I think the Sports Website Rule regarding Verlander-Kate Upton is Rule #38DD
In a 10 team h2h points league that counts (-1) for K’s. Should I drop Keon Broxton for Mitch Haniger. Nobody else is really on waivers. I know it’s only a couple of games but Broxton has looked lost and the K’s have me concerned.
Finnegan has sat down 19 in a row and is hitting 96 in the 7th.
Looks good.
@Derrick:
Checks scoreboard… vs phillies.
Meh.
@Derrick: i still dropped e-rod for him in a 28 per roster 12 team h2h money league just now. arguably i could’ve had finnegan first anyway.
@Joey Jo Jo Jr Shabadoo:
Even in his strong 2nd half last year he never showed gas like this.
Is Ron “coked’ up” Washington back in Texas and have a twitchy finger with that lineup card? Why is it they decided to bench Delino immediately following Andrus’ HR in the 7th???
Seriously, what’s the point of that move??? Although it’s making me realize there’s no point to keep on holdin’ DeShields if they’re going to keep jerkin’ him around like this.
You’ll probably say “just about all of them” haha, but who out of these guys do you see as ‘revolving doors’ who could make way for streamers, hot hitters etc? It’s H2H, 14 teams and pitching is quite tightly held…
C-Mart
Cole
Lackey
Gray
Hellickson
Ryu
Morton
@Stephen Lyon:
All but first two for me.
Remember when gray would stay up late?
Comment all night along with us.
Celebrate some aushizz!
Haha.
@FrankGrimes: i play in 14 team h2h’s and you’ll need to hold most of those. in fact right now i’d hold all of them, unless better options out there, which isn’t likely if you own morton. and yeah, grey used to be up till around maybe another 30 or so minutes for those late night
AU SHIZZ’s!
Dyson getting destroyed. Just gave up a grand slam after giving up 2 hits and 2 walks. Who’s in line for saves for Tex if he loses the job? Bush?
Also, Noma Masuza appears to be your early leader for MVP. Dude is killing it.
@letsgobravos: @Grey – so is the rule to not draft Rangers closers anymore? Last year Tolleson did the same crap…
@William Hung: should be bush at first, he was messed up yesterday too though. bush then jeffress likely. dyson/tolleson didn’t have (and dyson never had) good K rates. kela should be back at some juncture as well.
how the fuck is moore on hook for 6 earned when 3 of them came from lamb getting on 1st from an error when there were 2 outs, scoring owings/goldy, and then the next batter yes… many gets a double scoring lamb?
@Joey Jo Jo Jr Shabadoo: fox box score has it right, espn’s just being lazy, but this kinda shit usually only takes like 2 innings max to fix. yahoo’s going off same provider as espn.
watch what’s probably about to happen, i’m gonna luck into a farq save in a 20 team league only from this game being in the 13th inning.
@goodfold2: or i forget what team farq is even on and SEA uses the last guy in their CURRENT bullpen, dude with a porn star’s name.
Is Shaw for rizzle my nizzle or destined to fizzle? Encouraged that he’s crushing lefties – sample size, sure, but ballpark + fly ball rate and he’s hitting in the 4 hole (that’s the left ear, by the way) makes me think he might be more than a hot schmotato….he dotted. Lot of sleeper lists in the preseason – I just grabbed him since I had a spot to play with. Your thoughts? (About Shaw, not the earhole, sicko)
@Lucky Dog: didn’t he start off really good last year too………
@Eli Man Penguin Boy: he did, but was a platoon guy hitting 7-8 in the lineup and in a worse ballpark for his swing (at least according to what I’ve read, but you know those FBB experts can be kinda squirelly)