I didn’t want to open this post with just any old sentence. I needed to come up with an unbelievable opening. Something that screamed brilliance. Something that truly captured my feelings for Andrew Benintendi. I held off on really gushing about him in an opening, because the time needed to be right. You know popping his opening cherry, so to speak was special stuff….(WOW! those were some words you could quote me out of context on, and it would look real bad on my part.) The time is here! So off we go, let the trumpets blow, and hold on because the driver of this mission is a horse proctologist by the name of Jan Wilbury. Is that my real name? It shall remain a mystery!! Oh yeah, Andrew Benintendi was promoted to AA Portland on Monday. The long and the short of it, or the “those Grey readers who just read the openings to other posts and scoff” version of why you should care. He’s a future 5 category, 6 if you’re in OBP leagues, contributor, and he’s going to be in the Boston outfield in short order. I suppose he could be in someone else’s outfield too, if there’s a …..gulp….trade. I’d just like to suppress those thoughts for today.
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If you walk out that door, you’re going to miss a great comeback. Hunt Stevenson kicked ass. And even though he didn’t actually meet the goal of 15,000 cars So Yamamura was so impressed with Hunt’s efforts that he declared his team successful. Just another example of a great 1980’s movie. Modern technology be damned, the 80’s was awesome. Speaking of awesome, let’s talk about the third baseman you’re going to wish you stashed on your DL if you don’t own one of Manny Machado, Nolan Arenado or Josh Donaldson. I refer to them collectively as the “Big 3B”. And no, there is no “Big 3A”. There’s the “Big 3A-holes”. That would be Justin Upton.
Please, blog, may I have some more?
I remember a time not long ago. A time when the #Barves were the Braves. I think said time predates the hashtag phenomenon which makes it, like, sooooo old. Before Fredi got Fired and even more importantly, before Freddy Got Fingered, you could count on three things: death, taxes, and the Braves reaching the playoffs. From 1991 to 1998, three Braves pitchers won six Cy Youngs. and the 90’s and early 2000’s were filled with Braves bats you’d love to roster in the current DFS world. Fred McGriff, David Justice, Andruw Jones, Chipper Jones, and Ron Gant, just to name a few. The Braves looked like they’d never come down from their perch…and now enter the dystopian future of Atlanta. Nick Markakis is your leadoff hitter. Retreads like Chase d’Arnaud and Gordon Beckham solidify your infield. Your most feared hitter is Freddie Freeman who is good, don’t get me wrong, but he bats like Adrian Gonzalez and Gonzo is eight years his senior. It’s a team that lacks identity, cohesion, meat in the middle of the lineup, pitching…yeah, we’re looking at the bleakest roster in MLB right now. Man, that’s depressing, I need something to cheer me up. I know, I’ll start a pitcher against their sorry a$$es! Those double dollar signs are me telling you you’re gonna rake in the dough starting Francisco Liriano tonight against these #Barves. They are bad and they only get worse when facing a lefty so gear up for a potential banner night for Francisco. But now that we’ve covered that, we need to move along so let’s do this. Here’s my nobel prize winning taeks for this Wednesday DK slate…
New to DraftKings? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well reserve your spot in the 25 Team Razzball Exclusive League set to run Monday May 23rd to wet your DK whistle. Just remember to sign up through us before you do. It’s how we know you care! If you still feel helpless and lonely, be sure to subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays.
Please, blog, may I have some more?
“Hey, I’ll take two home runs from Khris Davis and be more than happy. Oh, who am I kidding? I’ll take one homer. Gently farting in your direction, Prince Fielder. Three homers? Well that is too much for my little old heart.” So began the monologue I told myself in my mirror last night. I was wearing a fedora with a feather in it and no pants. That’s added color for you to understand the scene. Then, it was the ninth, the A’s in the lead and Davis’s night looked over with two homers until. Dot dot dot. Ian Desmond homered off Ryan Madson and sent the game into the bottom of the ninth inning. Khris Davis came up to the plate, bases loaded, already with two homers on his scoresheet, could he hit one more? Could my monologue presented to my reflection come to fruition? Could my neighbors stop screaming for me to put on pants? Yes on all three! Finished the night with 3-for-5, 6 RBIs and three homers (9, 10, 11). I had Davis ranked around eight rounds higher than anyone else because I thought he could easily hit 30 homers in an age when 30 homers doesn’t come that easily. Has anything changed since the preseason? Yeah, the date. Dur. I love Khris Davis and right now looks even better than his namelganger, Chris Davis. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
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One Man’s Trash: Jackie’s All Grown Up
May 17, 2016 | 2023 Fantasy Baseball | 61 Commentsby: Big Magoo
Does anyone remember the sitcom That ’70s Show? It was a harmless enough little show, despite the fact that it unleashed Ashton Kutcher upon the world and led to several high profile movie roles for lead actor Topher Grace (why?). Perhaps most notably, it also introduced the public to a young actress named Mila Kunis, who portrayed a character named Jackie Burkhart. Jackie was young, cute, and full of potential, but man was she annoying. Her whiny, shrilly voice was like nails on a chalkboard. It was enough to make you want to hit the mute button or just change the channel entirely. Until recently, this week’s most added player, Boston Red Sox outfielder Jackie Bradley Jr. (84.2% owned; +54.5% over the past week), was just like the early version of that Jackie. A young player with solid upside who possessed a few annoying tendencies. Sure he could take a walk, but what good is that in fantasy (outside of OBP leagues) if there’s no stolen base or counting stats resulting from it? Think of the fantasy ramifications, dammit! Fortunately, JBJ has been more aggressive at the plate this season (48.3% Swing% – up from 43.7% in 2015), and it has paid dividends for him. His K% is down to a career low 21.1%, and his .962 OPS (14th in MLB) and .257 ISO (18th in MLB) are currently among the league leaders. Over the last two weeks, he’s produced a .423/.444/.769 slash line with 5 homers and 17 RBI. This version of JBJ is like That ’70s Jackie muted and wearing a coconut bikini (sorta NSFW). Expect the RBI pace to drop off a bit (30 RBI – 7th most in MLB), but he looks like a viable OF3 for the immediate future.
Here are a couple of other interesting adds/drops in fantasy baseball over the past week:
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RCL Update: The Week That Was, Week 6
May 17, 2016 | Our Leagues, Razzball Commenters League | 22 Commentsby: MattTruss
Are you feeling a little like Jose Bautista as the page turns to week 6 of the fantasy baseball season? Perhaps you aren’t sure where you are, how you got there and/or where you’re going. Dazed, confused, you look around for someone to hold you up. Oh good, there’s Adrian Beltre, he’ll keep me from falling down. Pretend to hold me back while I shake this off, would ya. With any luck you’re more on the Rougned Odor side of things and you’re landing a mean right hook on the rest of your league. Most of us are probably Sam Dyson though. We’re lurking in the background, just waiting to spear tackle Russell Martin. Underrated and underpublicized, we’ll be there in the end when it matters with a big play, hopefully ending on top. Grey is surely feeling a bit like Joey Bats this week after taking a mean punch in the grill from Rudy. He’s icing his ‘stache as we speak. Rudy is picking his ‘fro and giving JB the business. Punches were thrown all over the Razzball Commenter Leagues this week. Jump on down with me and see who else landed haymakers in the week that was, week 6.
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The amount of elite pitching available on Tuesday is absurd. First off, it’s Kershaw Day and that means you have to decide whether you want to take roughly 28 percent of your salary and invest in the only sure thing on the slate. Other attractive options include the head-to-head matchup between Max Scherzer ($12,700) and Noah Syndergaard ($11,400), both of whom should receive your exposure in selected spots. While I love all three pitchers on Tuesday, it’s hard to pass up another ace in Madison Bumgarner. Everything about this matchup is so perfect that MadBum will probably give up nine earned runs in 0.2 innings pitched and completely tank your line. JUST KIDDING! Bumgarner is safe and will be a chalk cash game play, but that’s okay. All we care about is results. This could very well be the first game of the season where Bumgarner goes the distance. Even if he doesn’t the strikeouts will be plentiful and a win seems likely.
New to DraftKings? Well reserve your spot in the 25 Team Razzball Exclusive League set to run Monday May 23rd to wet your DK whistle. Just remember to sign up through us before you do. It’s how we know you care! If you still feel helpless and lonely, be sure to subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays.
Please, blog, may I have some more?
All of Razzball Nation is feeling punchy this morning after a nice and violent weekend! On today’s show, Grey and I talk the Texas brawl, Grey gives it to me on Joe Ross, then I give it to him on Delino DeShields. So much going wrong! But then things start getting so much right-er as we talk Jackie Bradley Jr. on fire, Danny Valencia‘s power-fueled weekend, and some Super 2 prospects that could make an impact in a few weeks. Hurray for Pirates pitching debates! Here’s our latest edition of the Razzball Baseball Podcast, now with more karaoke stories!
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Please, blog, may I have some more?A Duvall hasn’t looked this good since Popeye starring Robin Williams. You thought I was going Robert Duvall and I steered it into Crazytown with Shelley Duvall. By the way, don’t look at current pictures of Shelley Duvall. She’s a Shelley of her former self. I have a theory. She had to do everything just so for Kubrick in The Shining, to the point where she couldn’t even think for herself, then she started working with Robert Altman, who was like, “Do whatever you like, improv,” and going from one extreme to the other drove her crazy. I’d put money on it that this is the biggest update on Shelley Duvall you will ever get on a fantasy baseball website. Any hoo! Adam Duvall (1-for-4, and his 7th homer, hitting .284) has been crushing the ball for the last two weeks. Now seven homers in 33 games. Fluky, right? Not so fast, Cousin Sweatpants. Duvall hit 26 homers in only 100 games in Triple-A and 27 homers in 91 Double-A games. He was always a power guy, just never really had a chance to play. He’s now getting that chance and proving he can continue to hit homers. Will he hit anything besides homers? That’s yet to be seen, but I’d grab him in all leagues where I needed power. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more?Nothing is a better, giant surprise than a Rubby in the morning!
Rubby De La Rosa has always been a guy with a power fastball and plus slider, but it’s never been enough. Ks haven’t been there, he couldn’t get lefties out, and he’s looked more and more like Nathan Eovaldi rather than “the next big thing”. But after yesterday’s outing, Rubby has somehow limited lefties to a .162 average and only allowed 1 homer in 87 LH batters faced. Compare that to last year, when lefties murdered him for .315 and 20 homers in 410 batters faced.
After a pretty brutal start – including 3 relief appearances due to the D’backs bullpen being overtaxed – I really didn’t think too much about Rubby and his upside. Kinda thought “he is who we thought he is!” Wait, that’s a different Arizona sports team… His last 5 starts have been really good with solid Ks, but I thought for sure the Giants with their bevy of lefties would crash the party. Alas, we got a Giant surprise! Here’s how Rubby looked yesterday afternoon in Zona against those Gigantes:
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You know how that should go. Countin’ money you know how it goes. Pray the real live forever man. Pray the fakes get exposed.
Couldn’t have said it better myself, Drake. We’re six full weeks in and I’m just gettin’ tired of these fakes taking up roster spots due to their name value. Ya know? Pray that real live forever, man! Ok, well, I don’t really pray about fantasy baseball, but I hope that some of the bigger names turn it around and come back to life for the sake of our fantasy baseball teams. When it comes to ranking the Top 100 hitters in terms of rest-of-season value, though, it’s time to cut bait on a few. And, honestly, I may even be late by a few weeks in bringing out the scissors. You’ll see a lot of names at the bottom of the rankings this week that dropped out. Don’t freak out. Don’t get emotional. Look at the stats, even the deeper stats, and you’ll see it’s more than time to get the hotter players in your lineups regardless of name.
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SAGNOF Report: Smoke Show Stealing The, Well… Show
May 16, 2016 | Closers, Steals | 19 Commentsby: Smokey
You see that old rocking chair in the corner? That’s me, mister reliable. Made of wood and literally been around these parts since the dawn of time. I may not be the smartest fella, or the fartest smeller either, but I dig baseball. I get the stats and the hub-bub surrounding the intricacies of deeper stats. Relaying them in a manner that makes sense on paper and conveying them to you in a way that makes us all put away our Casio calculator watches is my style. This report covers similarities from what I touch on the regular in my bullpen post, so for the normalcy of life, I will add some of my usual middle relief spice into the streaming world of stolen bases. Sound good, grand glad we could agree. Rostering established stolen base guys is all well and good, but is a better feeling when you stream an option and he gets one that wasn’t normally accounted for. Kinda feels like stealing, in the actually stealing sense and not just in the statistical sense. The world of streaming swipes is becoming harder and harder as stolen bases are a stat best left for the dudes hitting dingers. The more a pitcher lets players get on base with SB opportunities, the increase for SB’s grows… sometimes. This is my first attempt at this post, so I am starting it my own way. So let’s look at this weeks options to stream stolen bases and the trends for which to follow for streaming ideas. Cheers!
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