Less Bunts, More Schwarbers

February 21, 2022 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 71 Comments

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Ron Blomberg, the first DH known to man, stood in a parking lot, outside Parsippany, New Jersey’s Ramada Inn, sipping a coffee and eating a donut. Mr. Blomberg was there to meet new recruits for the National League DH. A starry-eyed, Paul DeJong stepped up for a badge to Ron’s seminar, and to chat with Ron.

“I’m a big fan, Mr. Blomberg.”
Ron looks Paul DeJong up and down, not thinking much of him, “Of course, you are.”
Paul tries a new tact, “When you’re DH’ing, the electricity coursing through your veins, the fans at a fever pitch, it can’t be that hard to come off the bench, right?”
“It’s easier to get come off a towel,” answered Ron, as he handed DeJong his crumbled up napkin, holding his donut crumbs, and walked into the Ramada.

As expected when I started my 2022 fantasy baseball rankings, the DH is coming to the NL. Personally, I’m pumped, like I was Ron Blomberg myself, who gets a nickel for every DH at-bat, because Ron Blomberg invented the DH. His income just doubled. Have you seen the latest Fortune magazine with Ron Blomberg on the cover with the title, “Nickelaire?” Sorry for all the old schoolers who think pitchers hitting is sacred. I think it’s a sacrilege to hitting. Tomato-tomato-pronounced-with-a-different-emphasis.

You, a thoughtful person, “But NL pitchers have been working on their bunt for 47 years!”
Me, a person who doesn’t give a flying eff, “Pull the plug!”

If Paul DeJong’s first taste of being a DH isn’t a success, there could be upwards to 550 more chances this year. Dot dot dot. If the Cardinals want to have the worst DH in the National League. All of my 2022 fantasy baseball rankings are currently accurate as far as DHs in the NL, but once guys start signing, things could change dramatically. I’d guess at least half the NL teams go out and sign someone, and the Brewers cut half of their DHs. Hey, the Brewers used to be in the AL, right? So, is that why they already have five DHs? Maybe they can give one — say, Rowdy Tellez — to the Cards. If I were the Cards, I’d be on the lookout for anyone. Yes, I’m suggesting they pass on the DeJong, while he gets the Grey poop-on. Tomorrow, I will start a multi-day forage into the newly minted NL DHs, going through each NL team and their perspective DH, as I try to find a truffle in the pig shizz. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this preseason for 2022 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

An End To The Best Baseball Season Of The Decade

October 4, 2021 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 166 Comments

by: Grey

You emerge from mother’s basement, holding your hands up to your eyes to block the sun, and scream, “Ma! I won my fantasy league! Ma!” You stop to look around; it’s a fiery landscape reminiscent to an apocalypse. You open further the basement door, and it falls off its hinges. Scared, you whisper, “Ma?” There’s no walls anymore on your house, which gives you a vantage point to the entire surrounding area that smolders. Coming up your once-tree-lined street is a posse of thousands of–An army from another country? Another world? Who are these people? What have they done with your family? Just as the questions dissolve over you, a warrior spots you and grunts for you to get in line. You reach for the only weapon you can get your hands on, a Lou Pinella commemorative mini-bat from a 1981 stadium giveaway, and join the post-apocalyptic army. As you scuttle into position behind the marching forces, you see a group of warriors carrying your mother’s head on a pitchfork. Overcome with emotion, you run up and scream, “Ma! I gotta tell you about the fantasy league I won!” In this scenario, I am your mother, and the army is Razzball. You’re welcome! Today is the day when you realize you’ve spent 27,000 man hours this summer beating eleven other strangers to win a virtual trophy, and it feels great! That’s if you won your league, if you came in 2nd or worst, you get an A for effort.

Another baseball season is in the books, for our purposes at least — or porpoises, if you’re a dolphin — since no leagues I know of count game 163, and with a baseball season in the books, it means Cody Bellinger’s 2021 is now in the books, and, in conclusion, that is why they should burn books. Any questions? *calls on a white guy who looks zonked* Yes? “If I’m going to IHOP is it MeHOP, MyselfHOP or IHOP, or does it depend on usage?” God damn it, is that you Cody Bellinger?! Stop smoking so much weed! *Cody lowers his head, kicks a rock and walks out of the room* Okay, if there’s no more questions, I have one: how long until next year’s rankings come out?! Wait, I have to write them. When I’m done, I’ll start to put them on our Patreon. Now, one more question, what do I do for the next three months? Oh, yeah, write the rankings! Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

FanDuel: Some Like It Hot

July 27, 2021 | 2021 Fantasy Baseball, DFS, Fanduel | 1 Comment

by: RyanStar

Welcome back to the Tuesday edition of Fanduel DFS here on Razzball. Full slate tonight and almost zero weather concerns. It’s hot and humid across the land, and with not many aces going tonight, I’m expecting plenty of runs to be scored. We have a few solid pitching matchups at the top and not much else that jumps out. The heat gets me excited, particularly in KC and Philly for whatever reason. I’m looking for the overlooked stacks to mix in with that high ceiling semi-chalk.

Good luck tonight, and remember to stay positive and visualize that bank roll spiking. Visualize your success! You HAVE to believe it to be true before it can happen. Go with your gut and do it with confidence. Let’s go!

New to FanDuel? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well, be sure to read our content and subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays. Just remember to sign up through us before jumping into the fray. It’s how we know you care!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Mets Make Harvey Trade Batsuit For Hazmatt Suit

June 10, 2021 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 343 Comments

by: Grey

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First off, can we talk about Mason Williams? Does he show up each day at the park wearing a giant paint can? He’s a mascot for a paint company, right? Every 7th inning stretch, they should have him race a Dutch Boy. That’s just marketing. “The Dutch Boy mascot or an actual Dutch boy?” Damn it, you and your very smart questions. Listen, you have to decide some stuff on your own, but if you can get Mads Mikkelson, you have to do it. So in addition to Mason Williams (2-for-4 and his 1st homer, hitting .250), all the other Mets also got after former Met, Matt Harvey (3 IP, 7 ER, ERA at 7.41). Must’ve been a nice night to be in the David Wright household. “Who’s a cuck now?!” David screamed at his TV. Was there an Albombso? Oh, there was an Albombso — Pete Alonso went 3-for-5, 3 runs, 3 RBIs and his 10th homer. Kevin Pillar (3-for-4, 4 RBIs, hitting .262) hit his 3rd and 4th homer. True to his name, Pillar’s had a lot of columns written on him after taking one off his moneymaker. Pillar deserves it. Finally, Billy McKinney (3-for-5, 3 runs, 5 RBIs) hit his 6th and 7th homer. He’s a stereotypical Brewers’ hitter, which makes it odd they’d let the Mets steal him away. He’ll make lousy contact, hit some homers and would I like him more if his name was Mads McKinneyson? Yes. Billy Madsonney? No. Billy McKinsey? Definitely not. He’s a hot schmotato, pretend you know the haps. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

FanDuel: Manaea Vs Food

June 2, 2021 | DFS, Fanduel |

by: Barrelman

Welcome to June baseball everyone! Typically, I tend to fade games in Coors. Ownership tends to be very high and as a result it’s hard to gain an advantage. However, I won’t call you a fool playing hitters on those nights. If stacking is your play, I think there are some pretty interesting games. Stacking either side or both of the Minnesota/Baltimore game is a strong play. The same can be said about the Washington/Atlanta game.

I like Houston as sneaky stack as well. Nick Pivetta has enjoyed the breakout we’ve been waiting for over the last 3 seasons. However, he is still walking plenty of batters and has a predominantly fastball/slider pitch mix. This isn’t great as the Astros have the lowest K rate in baseball. Moreover, they are 8th as a team against fastballs and 1st against sliders. While I do think the Coors game will have plenty of runs scored, there are good options elsewhere.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Fanduel: Bye, Bye, B(ye)aez

May 20, 2021 | 2021 Fantasy Baseball, DFS, Fanduel |

by: Butters

It’s Thursday and that means its time to win some sweet sweet DFS money. So let’s get right down to it and find some great values like Javier Baez (SS: $3,300) He’s been doing his thing which is hit bombs and steal bases. And the average ain’t half bad either. He’s on a roll right now so get him in your lineup and wave bye bye bye to the the competition.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

FanDuel: Astros Will Not Be Out Dunn

April 28, 2021 | DFS, Fanduel | 2 Comments

by: Barrelman

Welcome to another quirky Wednesday main late. Jacob deGrom has played his way into plug and play status for DFS. Unfortunately, the main slate starts at 7:05 PM EST and the Mets play at 6:40 PM EST. Fear not though as we have a healthy 10-game slate on tap. Well almost healthy as I don’t expect the Cardinals and Phillies game to be played due to rain.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Vlad Troikas The Nats

April 28, 2021 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 478 Comments

by: Grey

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Every year, Vladimir Guerrero Jr. showed up at camp saying he was in the best shape of his life. He was like a Russian nesting doll of “Best Shapes.” Or a caterpillar. Shed one Best Shape, and reveal another Best Shape. Then another Best Shape gone, and another Best Shape emerged. “I think someone left their earth skin in the washing machine.” That’s the Blue Jays’ clubhouse attendant finding one of Vlad’s Best Shapes. Then, this year, Vlad, the Mini Impala, showed up at camp with his Best Best BEST Best Shape. A Best Shape to best every other Best Shape. And it’s the best. Last night, he went 3-for-4, 7 RBIs, as he hit three homers (5, 6, 7). He’s gonna hit 40 homers and .350, isn’t he? People are going to be talking about Vlad Jr. in a few years the way they talk about Mike Trout. He’s hitting for power without sacrificing average, and it’s gorgeous. Good for you, Vlad. I’m glad he finally is in the Best Best BEST Best Shape of his life. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Nolan Archenado

February 1, 2021 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 109 Comments

by: Grey

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Not usually my style, but we’re taking a break from the 2021 fantasy baseball rankings for a day because of the big trade between the Rockies and Cardinals (and a shizzton of other moves). All the 2021 fantasy baseball rankings, including pitchers, are already up on our Patreon.

So, the Rockies are trying to lose, and they’re a stupid franchise. That is a bad combination. Like burning down your house for insurance money after letting your insurance lapse. The Rockies gave away their marquee player and $50 million. If this is a rebuild, and Austin Gomber is the start of–I’m sorry. I can’t even say Austin Gomber with a straight face. The Cards got Arenado for a Gomber pile of garbage. Bud Black is actually the perfect imbecile to run that team. So, on Arenado’s fantasy value, well…*swallows*…okay, so…*collects thoughts* Yeah, I moved him down in my rankings.

Arenado was traded to the Cards, and I can’t possibly tell you he’s as safe to draft in St. Louis. I don’t think the park change is as dramatic as some are making it out to be. I don’t think he’s suddenly done. I know his road/away splits, but as said many times before, guys are better at home. Even guys who aren’t in Coors. You’re staying at home, you’re surrounded by family and friends, you’re seeing your wife–Wait, are these reasons to enjoy being at home? Right, yes, I kid! Home numbers are always better. Familiarity with the park, just being more comfortable. It’s always like this; there’s stats to back it up, don’t make me pull them out. So, Arenado might not have been great on the road when he played in Coors, but you can’t just say his new home numbers will be his old road numbers. Doesn’t work like that. Trying to see the difference between him and, say, Jose Abreu, though, has become nearly impossible and Abreu isn’t a top 20 overall pick, and neither is Arenado now. I moved Rafael Devers up to the top 20 for 2021 fantasy baseball; Arenado dropped about ten overall spots (but only one spot in the top 20 3rd basemen), and I lowered his projections a bit. His new projections: 88/32/106/.279/1 in 592 ABs.

For what it’s Wuertz, here’s out Steamer projections pre-trade: 103/35/103/.286, 4th best 3B, ~20th overall. Here’s him post-trade: 86/29/85/.256; 8th-10th 3B, ~110TH overall. Um, that’s kinda gross. And, to add fire to the inferno whooshing around the Torenado, look at projections of Austin Riley vs. Nolan Arenado:

Anyway, here’s what else I saw this offseason for fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The Saturday Morning Post: Springer Has Finally Sprung

January 23, 2021 | 2021 Fantasy Baseball | 4 Comments

by: JKJ

Howdy-do, folks. I surely do ‘preciate you stopping by for the latest in the world of offseason baseball.

The Blue Jays made three exciting signings, only to have it turn into two exciting signings (unless a Tyler Chatwood signing excites you, then you can still call it three) because the Astros swooped in. For a few hours there, the Jays lineup looked pretty damn formidable. I still really dig it, for what it’s worth.

Other things happened, too. Here’s what stood out to me:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Philadelphia Freedom (From Reporting COVID-19 Cases)

July 3, 2020 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 81 Comments

by: Grey

Well, this is icky. I don’t know what MLB is doing by reporting that they’re not reporting Covid cases. I mean, I think I get it. It’s icky and it’s tricky and — “Shut up, brain, don’t start singing Run-DMC.” — and AND and I don’t know! But not reporting it is doing what exactly? They report injuries to Mitch Haniger that make you want to cross your legs. They report injuries about how a guy fell in a bathtub with a deer — hello, Clint Barmes! — but they don’t report Coronavirus? I just…I don’t know. Not sure it’s the answer. With that said, the Phillies placed Scott Kingery, Hector Neris, Tommy Hunter and Ranger Suarez on the IL yesterday without even a press release. Someone just happened to notice the roster moves. Does that mean they have Covid? Again, I don’t know. Since they announce literally every other injury, one can conclude. How serious is their symptoms? Again, no idea. This is gonna be one helluva 60-game season, huh? My solution is, if you really don’t want Covid speculation, just don’t announce any injuries at all. Change the IL to the ILL and whether it’s a hammy or Covid, don’t say anything. Just say they’re ILL. As for fantasy, Neris’s loss for saves could be huge, but we don’t know yet he’ll miss any of the season. I’d hold him. If you want to speculate, I guess Adam Morgan or a committee (which is atrocious for a 60-game season). As for Kingery, again, we don’t know how long he’ll be out (or why he’s out), so hold. This could be a boost to Adam Haseley. He could be a top 60 outfielder with everyday at-bats, and worth a shot. Or not. Wheeeeee! A 60-game season! Anyway, here’s what else I saw for fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Ambulance Chasers Preseason: Testing 1…2…3

July 1, 2020 | 2020 Fantasy Baseball, Fantasy Baseball Injury Report |

by: Hammer

So we’re gonna have a season, maybe, hopefully…..who knows. But we need to be prepping like there’s going to be one. So let’s take a look at some of the specifics that have come down from MLB with the new plan for the season and how it should effect how you handle injuries/Covid related issues going into the year.

First off, the rules. MLB released a list of precautions when they and the players’ union approved the deal for the 60 game season. Testing is the biggest thing we need to keep an eye on. Everyone’s getting tested for active Covid-19 as well as antibodies upon reporting to Spring Training 2.0. They will not be cleared for work until they tests negative for Covid (we’ll come back to this). In season, players will undergo multiple “symptom tests” per day (temp checks and “how are you feeling” questionnaires). They will also be tested every other day.

So what happens if someone tests positive? Well, each team has to put in place their own Covid handling program that meets certain minimum requirements. The biggest thing though is that, in order to be cleared to play, a player must test negative twice within a 24 hour period and show now symptoms for 72 hours. This is a big deal. There’s no real rhyme or reason for how long Covid stays in your system, but even asymptomatic cases seem to last a minimum of 14 days. I looked into some prominent cases that took place over in Europe when Covid hit some of their soccer leagues: Callum Hudson-Odoi, a winger for Chelsea tested positive for Coronavirus at the beginning of March. He wasn’t able to test negative until the beginning of May, despite showing few symptoms. Paolo Dybala, who plays for Juventus, tested positive in mid-March and was asymptomatic. He wasn’t cleared until almost the end of May. Suffice to say, it’s going to be case by case when it comes to each one of these testing scenarios, but I think it would be wise to treat a positive test like a month long or more injury when trying to evaluate how to handle your roster.

Please, blog, may I have some more?