The following details are from secret documents released by RazzAnon in a major investigation, sponsored by Manscaped.
In 2020, New Line Sports apparel -- sick of only selling Fernando Tatis Jr. shirseys -- met in secret with one Mr. Robert Manfred in a Dennys somewhere outside of Taos, New Mexico. The topic of conversation? Ridding the world of hits. "We want people to love Wade Miley, and buy several of his sweatbands," one employee was caught saying on tape recorder. What followed was a year-long effort to rid the world of hits, bat flips, dingers, and dongers. "A no-hitter every game was our ideal, maybe one or two bunts at most," said Carleton Evers, the social media marketing manager. "We just wanted to change the game of baseball into pitching highlights with ball trails on every pitch."
Manfred, no stranger to messing with the game he oversaw, put low-T District of Columbia senator Miles Miller in charge of ending the hit parade. "When we went to Nationals games, we didn't want to see Sexy Dr. Pepper," Miles said to YouTube reporter BurningFastball, "we just wanted to see Erick Fedde whiffing batter after batter after batter. Perfect innings, every inning. That was the plan. Change pitchers every 6 batters or so. The optimal time to stand up, buy a beer and a hot dog, and get an Austin Voth shirsey."
RazzAnon will conduct a meet-up at the baseball Hall of Fame in Canton, Ohio, on June 31st to release more details about what we've found, connecting Manfred to Richard Branson, Carrot Top, and a secret underground cabal of Cuban cigar manufacturers stealing humidor technology from the United States. Stay frosty, friends!
See all of today’s starting lineups
| # |
|
ATH | ATL | BAL | CHW | CIN | HOU | LAD | MIN | TB | TEX | TOR | WSH | ARI | BOS | CHC | CLE | COL | DET | KC | LAA | MIA | MIL | NYM | NYY | OAK | PHI | PIT | SD | SEA | SF | STL |
In the dawn of blurb time, there were single-celled blurbs. They were a simple organism that regurgitated relevant counting stats and percentages, and they survived by eating game scores in the spring and summer months, only to hibernate during the winter. As the eons marched on, the first blurb crawled from one of the oceans onto dry land. These blurbs were more organically complex, including recommendations to pick up or drop certain players, dependent on certain conditions. Some blurbs even survived during the winter months on a diet of trade rumors and roster moves.
And then one day there was an explosion.
I really didn't understand the whole Bo Bichette is greater than Vladimir Guerrero Jr. movement that took place this draft season. That's not a knock on Bichette by any means, but instead an affirmation that Vlad is a very special player that came into this league as the highly touted number one prospect ahead of Fernando Tatis Jr, Eloy Jimenez, Kyle Tucker and Bo Bichette. While it does seem like Bo had a smoother transition into the big leagues, anyone that thought Vlad wasn't going to find his groove likely made a bad decision (or three) along the way. A few years ago there were many preaching that Guerrero Jr. was going to become the best player in the game. Well the hype train has just arrived at the station as he currently leads all hitters in fantasy points. I know Ronald Acuna Jr. has been lighting the roto world on fire, but he still has less points than Vlad. By the way, what's the deal with there being so many top tier hitters with a Jr. at the end of their name? I wonder if I should change my name to malamoney Jr.
Razzball Patreon members receive our weekly podcast where Grey cackles about the funniest news stories we’ve found over the past week, plus you get that warm fuzzy feeling of supporting your favorite fantasy sports site in all the land.
It’s your favorite hour of the week!
I Can’t Believe It’s Not Not News is back again with all the Billy Hurley jokes and Grey Albright cackles you can handle. First up, a drunk man at Kid Rock's Steakhouse uses his colostomy bag as a weapon against the police and Billy Hurley is there for it. Then scientists solve the "Giant Penis Man's" origin date but Grey is very skeptical about whether or not the scientists actually know what they're doing. Finally, we head down under as an Australian woman wakes up with an Irish accent after surgery and an Australian diver spots a fish sporting a gold wedding band.
Tune in now for all the laughs and Albright cackles you can handle by signing up for the exclusive
Razzball Patreon Club for only $5/month, or upgrade to receive the weekly podcast plus early access to all of Grey's 2021 fantasy baseball buy/sell posts for just $13/month!
Find all of this week's stories here:
Greetings! Hope everybody had a great weekend and a profitable out there in DFS land and wagering land if you do that as well. Hot and Cold for me this week as some teams popped this week (Hello Braves and Giants I see you) that I didn't have too much exposure too so no bueno there if you didn't have any players on those two teams. I have been doing a lot of diversifying players and looking at some park factors and umpiring trends as well to try and make sure I am giving myself the best opportunities to cash in on some nuances that other players might not be utilizing in their lineups. It's been a mixed bag honestly but it's still pretty new so I'm ok with the result so far. Just some things to think about when building your own lineups. All right let's get to it, shall we?
New to FanDuel? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well, be sure to read our content and subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays. Just remember to sign up through us before jumping into the fray. It’s how we know you care!
[brid autoplay="true" video="786119" player="10951" title="RZBL%202021%20WAIVER%20WIRE%20WEEK%208" duration="154" description="undefined" uploaddate="2021-05-21" thumbnailurl="//cdn.brid.tv/live/partners/9233/thumb/786119_t_1621565488.png" contentUrl="//cdn.brid.tv/live/partners/9233/sd/786119.mp4"]
Maybe I’m just a guy that puts feety pajamas on over his head. Maybe I walk into a Subway and ask a sandwich artist, “Do you smell onions?” Maybe I stare at people playing Jenga and try to move the pieces with telekinesis. Maybe I pronounce the D in Django. Maybe I call diner waitresses “Sweetheart” and old guys “Sonny.” Maybe I could be wrong, but
Austin Riley (2-for-4, 5 RBIs and his 8th and 9th homer, hitting .320) feels like he's headed to be a top 25 player drafted next year. In December of last year, I wrote an
Austin Riley sleeper. I have hand eyes like in Pan's Labyrinth, and those hands are pressed up against Statcast. I said in that sleeper that Riley was a guy who could be drafted after 250 and have top 50 overall value. It was December and I wrote that in November, so while I was very fortune tellery to foresee Austin Riley, his ADP was 202th overall in NFBC, not 250. Still huge value if the top 50 value comes to fruition. As I mentioned last week, he flattened his swing a lot, becoming more of a .280 hitter, than the .240 one he was coming into the year. The only question mark now is with a flatter swing, can he still homer? This week's six homers does a good job of saying flatter does not make the ironing bored. Pun...and a miss! Anyway, here's what I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:
Another week and yet again, another No-Hitter. This time courtesy of the veteran Corey Kluber. No-Hitters have somewhat lost their novelty this season for me because of the vast amount of them in such a short period of time. Also, a fun stat, if you face either the Mariners, the Indians, or the Rangers you have just under a 5% chance of throwing a No-Hitter. We've never seen anything like this, so all we can do is embrace it and that is the plan. The last few weeks I have picked a stud pitcher to throw one and seeing how that's not really the trend, we're going to switch it up and the pick this week is...Yusei Kikuchi. We'll get to him later on.
Other Noteworthy news, Jacob DeGrom is set to return Tuesday lining him up for a 2 start week. Kenta Maeda was placed on the IL with an Abductor Strain. Chris Sale has started a throwing program and is pitching off a mound which is good news to hear. Noah Syndergaard's Rehab Assignment in AAA is beginning this week, so if he's still on the waiver wire he's somebody to monitor closely. And lastly, Scott Kazmir pitched last week for the Giants for the first time in over 5 years! What an unlikely thing to say, but who doesn't love a good comeback story. That's the news, and there's a bevy of must-start pitchers this week so let's begin!
At the start of the season, I was certain Ozzie Albies was the top fantasy second basemen, followed closely by DJ LeMahieu. I was so smart to rank them there and I knew it. Filling out my top five were Whit Merrfield, Keston Hiura, and Brandon Lowe all ranked in my Top 5.
I wish I could say I was spot on about all five players. But if there is one thing that I should have learned in my lifetime, it is that what I am certain about in baseball is not always the way things turn out.
My initial Top 5 currently has only one player still there. Thanks, Merrifield, for living up to expectations so far. The rest of you, ugh. Albies, LeMahieu, and Lowe all struggled out of the gates but have since shown signs of life at the plate. And if you are an owner of Hiura, I'm sorry. I hope you enjoyed the two-run homer he hit for the Triple-A Nashville Sounds the other day. So outside of Merrifield, my Top 5 was completely wrong.
So who is now in the Top 5 and fills out the rest of the rankings? Has Albies done enough to crack the Top 10? Has LeMehieu or Lowe? Let's find out.
All five streamers performed admirably last week! That's been the case throughout the year, though, and I'm ready to keep riding the wave here. With that said, the one-start streamers are much more trustworthy than the two-start guys this week, so don't be afraid to ride those pitchers harder this week. Haha, that sounds funny, but you know what I mean.
Hello again my fellow degens. Welcome back to our Sunday installment of MLB DFS. I finally lost count as to which number this is. It could just be my brain trying to erase these articles from my memory due t0 less then stellar performance as of late. This article is going to be a bit of a look back and then of course some plays to make for todays slate. I want people to feel confident that they are getting quality plays when they come here. Even though I had a good week personally 2 of my last 3 Sunday touts have mostly missed the mark. If you have wagered on the teams in our Lines in Vegas section you feel different because I have been close to a stone cold lock with regards to bets. Unfortunately for me, if not so much for you, this is primarily a DFS article. Before we get into the WHO, I want to talk about the HOW.
New to FanDuel? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well, be sure to read our content and subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays. Just remember to sign up through us before jumping into the fray. It’s how we know you care!
A wave of excitement ran through the baseball community like Bo Jackson bursting for the corner and up the sideline. Our collective breaths were held hostage once again by the state of Florida (why is it always Florida?) as we waited for our Wanderwall to save our batting averages.
Turns out we got Taylor Walls, much to the surprise of nobody who’s followed Tampa for two seconds but certainly to the chagrin of baseball fans everywhere.
But maybe Walls’ll be the one that saves us. Cause after all . . .
He’s good at baseball.
He’s no Vidal Wandersoon, but he’s fine for anyone looking to save some coin, and let’s face it, our fantasy teams are in Tampa’s boat on that front. Everyone loves a price break in fantasy. We probably wouldn’t tap and sap our very souls to get it, but that’s life in the so-it-goes era of Major League fuckery.
Sorry for the detour. I’m putting work into the Top 100 Update and wanted to open the floor to discussion. In this space, I’ll air out some thoughts kicking around as I build the list and invite your thoughts on the season so far. The more minds the better, is my general approach to all things thought and perspective.
This offseason reports were aplenty of Vladimir Guerrero Jr. getting into the best shape of his life and the monster season he would unleash on the league. This is such a common story, that we often dismiss the notion that results could follow. For Vladdy Jr. himself, we also had concerns with his notably high groundball rate driving down the opportunities to put the ball over the fence and ultimately driving in runs. Well, early this season we are seeing the ball hit harder than last year with more flyballs and a bit of luck. That is the perfect recipe for success and a jump into the top 10 of the rest of season top 100 hitters. It is scary to think that Vlad is only 22 and may be only touching the surface of his potential.
There is a lot of movement this week as some hitters have not turned it around after early-season struggles such as Cavan Biggio or Francisco Lindor. Alternatively, there are guys like Mitch Haniger that bring joy to the rankings watching the comeback stories early in the 2021 season. Time to get into the most recent rendition of the Top 100 hitter rankings for 2021 fantasy baseball:
Page 4 of 14« First«...23456...10...»Last »
