Let’s start with the drool. Here’s Nate Pearson:

Wipes sweat bead from forehead, takes a long drawn-out beat, then, “Damn.” Here’s what else he does to hitters:

Wanna know how good a guy is? Watch how hitters attack, or in this case, try to attack him. These two examples of Nate Pearson’s butter don’t even show his 99 MPH cheddar. That cheese, if you will, is the reason why these hitters are looking so bad. Imagine sitting on a 99 MPH fastball, then this filth is dropped into the zone. You can’t hit anything there without guessing. You sit dead-red heat on his fastball, one of the best in the minors, and he drops in an 86 MPH change or a slider or a curve. Batter, batter, can’t touch butter! You can hope he doesn’t locate on one of the pitches, but last year, across three levels of the minors ending in Triple-A, he had a 119/27 K/BB. Yes, that’s beautiful. I guess you can argue that minor leaguers aren’t waiting on a pitch like major leaguers, but have you seen strikeout rates recently in the majors? Pearson’s going to chew up hitters and spit them into a barrel and send that barrel over Niagara, saying, “Get the f*** out of Canada!” So, what can we expect from Nate Pearson for 2020 fantasy baseball and what makes him a great dart throw?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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See all of today’s starting lineups

# MLB Starting Lineups For Mon 8/4
ARI | ATL | BAL | BOS | CHC | CIN | CLE | COL | HOU | KC | LAA | LAD | MIA | MIL | MIN | NYM | NYY | PHI | PIT | SD | SF | STL | TB | TEX | TOR | ATH | CHW | DET | OAK | SEA | WSH

So here we are in Snape’s cauldron of countless bubbling outfielders–some poisonous if not handled with care–attempting to divine the future of fantasy baseball.

Here’s a link to the potion so far.

One outcome of doing these rankings is claustrophobia.

Although maybe that’s the corona.

But given the choice of three outfielders, my preference varies based on where my team is in its competitive cycle. Maybe that’s intuitive to most readers, but I’m brainstorming ways to maximize this multiverse of scenarios. In that spirit, please consider these rankings as fodder for fluid conversation and thought.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The last news on Taijuan Walker is from March 9th. The Seattle Times reported, “Walker pitched three innings, allowing one run on four hits with no walks and four strikeouts Monday in Milwaukee’s 2-1 victory. He threw 43 pitches with 28 strikes – featuring a fastball that sat at 93 to 94 mph, that sinking change-up and a vastly improved curveball.” I go with changeup — one word, no hyphen, but other than that, it reads like a dream. *fighting self to not sing it, finally blurting out* It was all a dream, I used to read Word Up magazine. Ugh, sorry, I can’t stop myself whenever I hear or read “a dream,” I break into Juicy. It’s especially annoying when I shoot up in bed at four in the morning, sweating profusely and Cougs comforts me with, “Chester Cheetah is not chasing you, it was all a dream,” and I launch into song. That March 9th report was from Taijuan’s first spring training start (he pitched in “B” games prior), and before we knew there would be 78 days in March. Is it still March? Who’s to say? Not me, I’m not going out on that kind of limb. Just a week prior to that start, Taijuan Walker “wasn’t sharp” in his simulated game and a few months prior to that, I didn’t even rank him my top 100 starters for 2020 fantasy baseball or top 500. So, what gives? Or better yet…So, what about Taijuan Walker for 2020 fantasy baseball and what makes him a dart throw?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

From 2015 to 2017, Chris Archer threw over 200 innings in each season and racked up 252, 233, and 249 strikeouts respectively. Then, he was traded to the Pittsburgh Pirates after the All-Star break in 2018, and was wheeled down into the basement lab of Ray Searage. When he resurfaced, Archer produced the highest xFIP, homerun rate, and walk rate of his career. Hip hip hooray for Ray Searage! Entering the Rona TBD season of 2020, Searage is out and Oscar Marin is in as pitching coach. Is there value with Archer, as he is the 67th starting pitcher and 244th overall player being drafted in NFBC drafts from 3/1/2020 to 4/26/2020?

During the three-year span when Archer was slicing and dicing American League East batters, he was primarily a fastball, slider, and changeup pitcher. So, of course, when Searage got a hand on him in 2018, he broke what was successful and incorporated the sinker/two-seamer into his arsenal. After not throwing the pitch for three years, Archer started throwing it over 10% of the time. Why do you ask? Well, throwing low in the zone and pitching to contact was an organizational philosophy, which neutered both Tyler Glasnow and  Gerrit Cole in the past. Good times.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

This is the high point of my adult life as I connect with a hero of mine, hip-hop legend R.A. The Rugged man. R.A. joins us to chat about his new album “All My Heroes Are Dead”, his early days, the current state of hip-hop, and his legendary career. It’s a fun conversation for R.A. fans and hip hop heads a like. Tune in to an interview that doesn’t hang up in the first 30 seconds. R.A. ain’t no Canseco! It’s the latest episode of the Razzball Podcast.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I’m prolly the one hundred-millionth person to say this, but how are the San Fran Giants gonna have a prospect named Joey Bart and not Joey BART? Hey, Joey BART, do you have homeless people sleeping on your couch? If you don’t know what I mean, you’ve never been to San Fran. You’re better off, it’s an absolute slum. Los Angeles, where I am, and San Fran have a long-standing rivalry, which I don’t take lightly. I once drove eight hours to San Fran just to take a dump. I hate you, San Fran! I’m absolutely kidding. It’s a beautiful city, but as Mark Twain once said, the coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Fran. At least I think he said it; I’ve never googled it, but everyone in San Fran tells you that quote as some sort of badge of honor. Like being cold in July and August is good. What kind of city is cold in the summer months? Yo, San Fran, are you Australian? I think I see you in California, but you must be in Australia. Any hoo! (Wait, you want more San Fran bashing? Sorry, you need to go across the Bay Bridge for bashing.) Joey Bart is the future of the San Francisco Giants and why Buster Posey will be accumulating the league’s worst stats for a 1st baseman in the case Sooner v. Later. So, what can we expect from Joey Bart for 2020 fantasy baseball and what makes him a great dart throw?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

It has been a while guys. I will be entirely honest; I have thought about baseball for approximately five minutes over the last month prior to writing this article. The lack of clarity on the 2020 MLB season puts me at a stand still in how to approach it from a fantasy perspective and without a full picture it is almost impossible to determine a strategy. That said, it is evident that there are a few obvious winners from a delayed season. One of those winners is assuredly Mike Clevinger. It does not take a rocket scientist to embrace the idea that if a player was guaranteed to miss a percentage of the season, he has less value. However, the coronavirus has given him a new outlook on the 2020 season, with the ability to be a rotation mainstay from day 1. While I was as low as you can be on Clevinger in my original top 100 rankings a second look is needed under an entirely new scenario.

Mike Clevinger made a monstrous jump in the 2018 MLB season. He morphed from an upside arm having difficult to square up stuff into a complete pitcher. Most of this jump can be attributed to simply attacking the strike zone. His zone percentage in 2017 was 40.5%. In 2018, it jumped to 48.2%. His walk rate dove and he started showing signs of an elite arm. This set the foundation for a thrilling 2019 season in which Clevinger was a top 20 fantasy starter in only 126 innings thrown. This season was made possible by a 1-2 MPH increase in fastball velocity year over year. Clevinger’s fastball averaged 95.6 MPH in 2019 and the pitch went from a career negative to one of the best pitches in baseball with a 19.5 pVAL. Clevinger has always held a true 4 pitch mix but needed that fastball velocity leap to make the final jump to ace arm. Clevinger is only 29 years old meaning the velocity gains are not likely to fall off overnight. These gains will only help in making Clevinger’s best pitch, his slider, more effective. His slider has a positive pVAL in every MLB season he has thrown. He threw the pitch 5% more in 2019 to a batting average against of .176 and 21% whiff percentage. An underrated component of Clevinger’s game is that he is highly effective the 3rd time through the order. In my mind, this means he understands how to vary his approach and is using all his pitches to the full effectiveness. The ability to pitch a third time through the order is rare and something pitchers with only 2, or even 3, MLB pitches struggle to perform effectively.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Vince Cotroneo radio play by play voice of the Oakland A’s joins the podcast to breakdown the A’s organization. We breakdown possibly the best two corner infielders in the game in Matt Chapman and Matt Olson. Vince explains how Marcus Semien improved his defense and what helped him become a top 5 MVP candidate, also the steps Ramon Laureno took to become one of the best centerfielders in the game. Vince gives us his favorite game calls and memories over the years.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

This week Donkey Teeth and I (totally normally sentence) talk about how awesome it was that so many people signed up for the Razzball Patreon show, and I get an absolutely bonkers good idea. Seemingly, at the moment the podcast airs I realize that once the season starts, I can start putting up the roundups and Buy/Sell columns early on the Patreon page, so people can get them, and the advice they contain, hours or even a day before everyone else gets them. Then, we talk about the NFBC Best Ball league we were roped…bamboozled…C’mon, thesaurus, hoodwinked into by a bunch of Razzball commenters, and how the league is, being polite, set up in an interesting way. Also, because I am absolutely mystified about all things to do with Repulsive Giant Baby, we discuss that for far longer than anyone could/would imagine. What’s that, you don’t know RGB? You thought RGB was Roy G. Biv? Don’t be silly! I have a tweet for you:

Then, when the podcast can’t literally get better, it manages to take a turn for the sublime when we talk about the Titans’ NFL Draft War Room and how there might be not one, but two future Joe Exotic husbands there. Finally, (this is not in order), we talk about the Michael Jordan documentary, The Last Dance, and Donkey Teeth has a firsthand encounter with Scottie Pippen. We appreciate everyone who has signed for the show already — it really helps! And everyone who signed up for our ad-free membership. You guys are literally the best. I’d hug ya, but then we’d both get The Rona and that would be it for both of us. Again, here’s the ad-free subscription for $9.99, which helps big-time. To sign up to our show, go here:

Razzball Patreon

Please, blog, may I have some more?

So here we are somewhere in Snape’s cauldron among our top hundred divining the future of the outfield position in fantasy baseball.

Wild things have happened already. I knew it might get weird when I saw the ghost of Shoeless Joe while I was watching Parasite. 

Sorry, Sev: while we were watching Parasite. 

The other day, I got asked about Luis Matos and wound up mentioning Ronald Acuna Jr. 

Then dug deeper down into that rabbit hole and ate the mushrooms that made the idea grow. 

That was after people got mad at me for some inadvertent Trout shade. I blame Christian Yelich for being better than him at roto. 

Please, blog, may I have some more?

As we move closer and closer to a day that we can start beginning to think of a plan to start playing baseball (and I guess moving to Arizona, yikes), I’m realizing that my Padres content quota is sorely lacking. An entire preseason, with bonus pandemic time, and only one (one!) post highlighting a swinging Friar? WHAT NECROMANCERY IS THIS? Yeah, no clue how dark magics in all caps entered the chat, but this lockdown has been long, the flesh has been weak (don’t look at me like that when yours is too!), so I ask you: what exactly would be the downside of becoming bizarro Harry Potter with evil witch powers? +5 to magic missile, bro. [*Crosses arms, drops shades, waves wand in a counter-clockwise motion, raises the dead.] Regardless, I’m supposed to be talking about whales. Not just because San Diego is named after the vahina of one (silent ‘g’ for our NSFW friends), but because a literary tale as old as the last pandemic has just been referenced (give or take 50 years, but you get the point). The point is, I’m struggling connecting anything thematic in this lede, so we’ll just get to the part where I tell you about my Padres-content quarantine ending (check), the fact that I’ve somehow ended up writing about nothing but value pitchers the last month, so a hitter (a prospect no less!) would be a nice change of pace, and quite simply put: while Ismael Mena is prospect on the fringes, I’m here to convince you that you there might be something special here. Plus, I get to quote Herman Melville. NO DOWNSIDE FOLKS.

“I know not all that may be coming, but be it what it will, I’ll go to it laughing.”

That’s what she said…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

It’s already pretty difficult to forecast a player’s performance even with the large samples that we have. Consider Whit Merrifield, a player with a large recent body of work, as he’s the current active leader in consecutive games-played. Will he ever steal 20 bases again? How about Christian Yelich? He played most of 2019, but many remain skeptical that he can repeat that historic pace, at least to the same degree.

Please, blog, may I have some more?