Marcus Stroman tore his ACL and is out for the year.  Remember me?” says the Fantasy Baseball Overlord.  Then the opening to Seven Nation Army kicks in and FBO does a little dance.  His dance partner isn’t a person, but rather a pitcher’s limb.  It’s very disturbing to watch.  Oh, my God, he’s taking a picture with the limb with a seven-foot-long selfie stick.  Oh, this is just awful.  No one over the age of 14 should ever have a selfie stick.  Why do you hate such wonderful, Fantasy Baseball Overlord?  Why?!  “I wasn’t loved as a child.”  So, Stroman is out for the year and now the Blue Jays have moved one step closer to being the 2014 Texas Rangers.  All they need is Edwin to gain 200 pounds and have a boo-boo on his neck.  I’m guessing that filling in for Stroman will be Marco Estrada, but I have Aaron Sanchez and Daniel Norris projected in my top 400 and think they both will see some starts and have value.  It’s still too early to call on Sanchez vs. Norris, but I’d draft Sanchez first since he’ll either see starts or Brett Cecil will be nodus modus operandi.  As for Stroman, well, I’ll make sure to write a 2016 sleeper post for you.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw in spring training for fantasy baseball:

Edwin Encarnacion – Sidelined a few days with a sore lower back.  Hopefully, he tags out of the day-to-day injury corner to Joey Bats, and then Bats tags out to Jose Reyes Mysterio.

Cliff Lee – The Phils announced that The Adverb still has a tear in his flexor tendon, as he did last year.  Apparently, soaking it in water and rubbing chia seeds on it didn’t do the trick.  I’m confused too.  Who would’ve thunk such a thing?  He needs surgery, but The Adverb will throw through the injury to see if his condition improves.  To put this in terms you can understand, you have a rip in the crotch of your pants, but instead of having Sue-Li, from your cleaners, sew it for you, you tell her, “Sue-Li no Sew-Li.  I’ll be fine.”  Then you walk out of the cleaners and the rip catches on the door and now you’re walking down the street in your gotchies and Sue-Li is saying, “Stupid white boy.”  The Adverb’s career could be done if he has Sue-Li stitch him up, so he’s doing what he can to avoid that.  It’s a heartwarming story that I want to buy a Hallmark card for, but it still doesn’t make me want to draft The Adverb in any leagues.  I’ve removed him from my top 60 starters and top 400.

Denard Span – I’m not a huge fan of Denard Dawg.  He’s basically runs, average and decent-not-great steals.  So, the other day while drafting my NFBC team, I was looking at a spreadsheet of my team thus far.  It is a slow draft (it’s still going on), so I had time to really delve in and look at my team’s needs.  What I figured out was I needed runs, average and some steals.  Only two guys I really wanted that I don’t usually ever want.  Ben Revere and Span.  Revere was already taken, presumably by a Son of the American Revolution, so I grabbed Span.  And now he’s hurt.  The moral of this story?  You’re damned if you do and you’re damned if you Denard.  Obviously, I forgot the number one rule of Denard, he sounds too much like The Noid, and you’re supposed to Avoid the Noid!  The Nats are saying his core surgery will knock him out about 4 to 6 weeks, which has him returning around the end of April and missing about three weeks of ABs.  I knocked him down in my top 80 outfielders ever-so-slightly and in my top 400.  Michael Taylor will fill in while Denard tends to his core, and I’ve already ranked Taylor in the top 100 outfielders with iffy playing time, so I’m not adjusting him.  I like Taylor in leagues where you can find a suitable replacement for him in May when he loses most of his playing time.

Peter O’Brien – Rudy texted me the other day and said, “You should rank O’Brien in your catchers, especially since you ranked Hank Conger simply because he sounds like Chinese porridge.”  J.J. Hardy Har Har, that is not why I ranked Conger.  I also won’t be ranking O’Brien because I can’t find one person who says he can catch a major league game.  He sounds like Gattis without the glove, if you catch my drift, i.e., O’Brien’s so bad he can’t even catch my drift.  O’Brien seems like he needs a DH slot or a Goldy injury and that’s blasphemous.

Yasmany Tomas – He hit a homer yesterday.  Woohoo!  And, on defense, he looked like Chet in Weird Science after he was made into a turd.  Noohoo!  I’m thisclose to ranking Jake Lamb in my third base rankings, and could do it as soon as tomorrow.  Lamb is more of an NL-Only play, either way.  Think a 15 homer, .230 guy.

Gavin Floyd – Re-injured his elbow stress fracture.  This should give Floyd more time to do his public access variety show for his nephew.  Now, enters the quirky, limping doctor, House!  T.J. House could move into the Indians rotation, but they also have Zach McAllister that is out of options.  I’d put my money down on House.  I mean, what bad could ever come of a subprime mortgage?!  I placed House in my top 100 starters, and to read more check out Sky’s T.J. House sleeper.

Lance Lynn – MRI revealed a minor hip flexor strain and the Cards are saying he should be fine by the time the season rolls around.  As long as he doesn’t need to roll his hips apparently.

Mike Minor – Has rotator cuff inflammation.  There’s good news and bad news.  The good news is he’ll be shutdown for two weeks and will likely start the year on the DL. That this is good news is the bad news.

Stephen Drew – Named the Yankees’ starting 2nd baseman.  If you Google “the best Yankee 2nd baseman,” you find results for Tony Lazzeri, Cano and Willie Randolph.  If you Google, “the worst Yankee 2nd baseman,” Google asks you, “Did you mean Chuck Knoblauch or Stephen Drew?”

Brandon Cumpton – Had Tommy John surgery.  This was heard in Dr. James Andrews’ receptionist area yesterday, “You are now about to witness the strength of pitcher reconstructive surgery knowledge.  This ligament’s comin’ straight outta of Cumpton!  A crazy surgeon named Dr. James Andrews from a gang called Surgeons Wit Attitudes.  When I’m called off, arms are sawed-off, see the ACL and careers are hauled off.  Pitchers start to mumble, they wanna rumble.  Mix ’em up and cook their ligaments in a pot like gumbo.  So when I’m in your team clubhouse, you better duck, cause Dr. James Andrews is crazy as f*ck.  As I leave, believe I’m stomping, but, when I come back, boy, I’m takin’ a ligament straight outta Cumpton!”

 
  1. Adam says:
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    No mention of the Soler/Baez/Bryant 3backs? I had to change my pants 3 times.

    • K Clown Baez says:
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      @Adam: Yada Yada, even a broken clock is right two times a day… Ain’t no new jack city, k clown city yo

      • Adam says:
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        @K Clown Baez: They were right 3 times…in a row. And the Soler and Baez shots were massive. Just like my fantasy load in my pants. Get on board K Clown. Yo.

        • K Clown Baez says:
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          @Adam: Soler is a stud yes, but Baez will be a career .226 hitter (if he’s lucky), Bryan will be a career .243 hitter. Yawn

          • Hieronymous Lohse says:
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            @K Clown Baez:

            “Bryan will be a career .243 hitter”

            And you will be horribly wrong on March 11, 2015 at 7:50 AM.

          • McNulty says:
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            @K Clown Baez:

            Baez looks like the prototypical .226 hitter. He doesn’t quite fit the .229 mold and labeling him a .224 hitter sells him short.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Adam: It’s only about position battles and injuries at this point

  2. Goldirocks says:
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    The Jays should just boycott the remainder of spring training! They won’t have anyone left to play on opening day at this rate! Except for iron man mark buehrle of course!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Goldirocks: You should be their manager! Or GM! Or owner!

  3. J-FOH says:
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    At spring training Tomas looked like me running the bases…all arms and love handles

    • @J-FOH: Sounds like a Walktapuss…

      • Dave says:
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        @Wake Up:

        Hippowalkamus?

        • Wake Up says:
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          @Dave: Nice

    • Ra'zball Al Ghul says:
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      @J-FOH: love hands

    • Ra'zball Al Ghul says:
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      @J-FOH: throwin ‘bows and love hands, a cousin of jazz hands

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @J-FOH: He looks like a Spanish Lena Dunham

      • J-FOH says:
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        @Grey: Is her butt that big?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          They both look like the first nesting doll, that others are housed in

      • Hieronymous Lohse says:
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        @Grey:
        The thought of a Spanish looking Lena Dunham made me so angry I threw my soup against the wall. The thought of Judd Apatow having her back so completely made me nuke a second bowl of soup that I just threw at a cop’s face.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Haha

  4. Josh says:
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    Are you going to update your rankings Thursday based on how Will Ferrell does? I saw he didn’t make your top 400 so far.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Josh: I’m going to see it

  5. Mike says:
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    Arthrex FiberWire is the tool
    Then stitches from the mutha*ucking spool
    Me and you need dough-to-flow, so pay me
    I’m knockin pitchas out tha box, daily
    yo weekly, monthly and yearly
    until them dumb motherf*ckers see clearly
    that I’m down with capital, like 50G
    Boy you can’t fuck with me
    So when I’m in your neighborhood, your team will suck
    Coz UCLs are fugazi as f*ck
    And as I relieve the pain I’m bluntin
    I know it’s comin back, boy, and comin straight outta Cumpton

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Mike: Ha! Awesome!

      • Mike says:
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        @Grey: Thank you!

  6. piranhaman says:
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    I really wanted Refsnyder beats Drew. Wait.. i still think Ref could beat Drew or Didi before June.

    • @piranhaman: I really wanted him to beat Drew too… I don’t even care if he plays, as long as Drew gets beat…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @piranhaman: Ref’s not that exciting, but better than Drew, agreed

  7. Troy: The Collector

    troy says:
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    yo grey heard you on tout wars last night, sounds like u kind of abandoned your philosophy that draft. is that the norm for you or did something happen that draft to make you change the way you ususally draft.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @troy: It’s 15-team, OBP, different ball of mustache wax

      • Troy: The Collector

        troy says:
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        @Grey: little late i no but fair enough

  8. barker says:
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    12 h2h 3rd pick got auto drafted and not quite pleased with the results

    C mesoraco 1b pearce 2b murphy 3b sandoval SS empty OF ellsbury cargo blackmon util eaton neil walker bn lind avisail castellanos

    sp kershaw sp sale rp cody allen doolittle p latroy hawkins lester harvey hughes bn ventura kennedy quintana

    the offense is horrific pitching is mostly great obv trade pitcher(s) for bat(s)

    currently offered to me i give murphy lester harvey i get edwin encarnacion betts adams polanco

    i countered with murphy blackmon pearce lester harvey for edwin betts arenado adams polanco

    other proposed trades sale for tulo hughes for yelich

    are these trades even/fair and the dude with tulo also has reyes should i forget about the first deal and try trade lester for reyes

    can i afford to lose sale lester harvey and be left with kershaw hughes ventura kennedy quintana there is some decent options on WW not much for SS though

    • @barker: Ever heard of capitalization, punctuation or formatting? That’s so hard to read.

      • Baezaworldseries says:
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        @phillyrulez04: You missed a comma. Cust saying.

        • Cram It says:
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          @Baezaworldseries: Ain’t no oxford commas up in here!

      • Baezaworldseries says:
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        @phillyrulez04: Trolling rule #1.
        If you’re going to bash a guy for punctuation. Proof read.

        • Flowers misses his old glasses, but he's ok tho says:
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          @Baezaworldseries: read yr Aristotle, there’s no “good” way to be a bad person.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @barker: I’d take Edwin side…

  9. bossmanjunior says:
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    Ugh i was so excited about Stroman…

  10. Oppo Taco says:
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    Hey grey, had our draft last night, was wondering if you could give me your thoughts on my team, see any glaring weaknesses? Lawrie at 3b is pretty brutal, also I think Im light on speed. 12 team 5×5 keeper league. thanks!
    c- yadi
    1b- goldy
    2b – gyorko
    3b – lawrie
    ss – hanram
    of – Cutch, Jup, Bautista
    util – yelich, rizzo
    bench – Myers
    SP – MadBum (worried over his spring starts so far?), Cole, Wheeler, Paxton, Fiers, Wacha,
    RP – Kimbrel, Allen
    Bench – Clippard, Carlos Martinez, Mejia,

    • Baggiejohn says:
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      @Oppo Taco: Unless I’m missing something, you appear to have about 4 First Rounders in there. Were they hold overs from previous seasons?

      Glad I’m not competing with that line-up!

      • Baggiejohn says:
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        @Baggiejohn: Just read your post from yesterday, so answered my own question!

        Somewhat in awe of that batting line-up!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Oppo Taco: Team looks great, your keepers obviously didn’t hurt… If I had to pick out one bad thing, staff is kinda young… I like those SPs though

  11. Kiss a Bum says:
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    Do you use incorporate ADP into your cheat sheets? I’ve been using it but I’m not sure it’s helpful or harmful. I feel like I loose out players trying to draft them too close to their ADP.

    • @Kiss a Bum: Just take the guys you want in a snake…ADP is wrong Every. Single. Year.

      • Blue says:
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        @Wake Up: Well, it’s wrong but not random. There is some signal in the noise.

      • Kiss a Bum says:
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        @Wake Up: to be clear Wake Up, i dont use ADP as my rankings. I have my rankings and then take note of ADP so I dont draft players way ahead of where they tend to be going.

        • Wake Up says:
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          @Kiss a Bum: “I loose out players trying to draft them too close to their ADP.”

          I’m saying don’t be afraid to draft your guys.

          • Grey

            Grey says:
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            I agree with Wake… I was just saying before that if I have say Danny Santana 100 overall and where I’m drafting has him ranked 230 overall, I’d likely wait a few rounds…

    • Blue says:
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      @Kiss a Bum: IMO there are two basic uses for ADP. First, looking at the range of picks for guys in the first eight rounds or so to figure out what the chance is they’ll come back around to you (really important if you are drafting on one of the ends). Second, using the distribution of picks for the players you are targeting to be sure you get them (i.e., its foolish to try and extract a little bit of value trying to game out if the guy you want can be had in the 18th round instead of the 15th).

      • Wake Up says:
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        @Blue: Not saying it’s useless….saying it’s wrong…

        Here’s some really helpful post-draft analysis from 2014:

        Wow. Jose Abreu in the 4th round. What a reach vs ADP!

        Altuve, could of got him much later. Hahaha. (in the 3rd round)

        Really great value waiting until the 5th round for Pedroia.

        I’d really like to read the post-post-draft recap in October! Which is of course the only time whether or not you know it’s a reach. Speaking of…

        We are mostly agreeing here, but instead of 8 rounds, I would limit it to 4 or 5 rounds.

        Your ie part at the end is true for the whole snake draft, and is another way of saying exactly what I’m trying to say, what did someone once say about permutations…

        • Flowers misses his old glasses, but he's ok tho says:
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          @Wake Up: that cherry picking is sure clever. if you knew of pedroia’s wrist problem you would NOT have been happy with him in 5th round. You’ve have only gone with Abreu if
          – you didn’t already have 1st and CI covered with higher ranked guys, AND didn’t want to reach for a guy who was after 100 ADP. I already had 1st and CI covered and literally watched Abreu at top of my draft board for many rounds till he was taken (should i have grabbed my 3rd CI guy before most of the rest of my team was filled, maybe so).
          Cherry picking makes everyone look right. What about the “crazy value” we all got brad miller (rounds early), and gyorko at? You need to actually be right about the players (and/or cut them early enough) and, except for extreme value cases (abreu), not pay too much for those players.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Kiss a Bum: I rarely pay attention to ADP unless it’s insane, and a guy isn’t going to go for another 5+ rounds than I have him

  12. JeF With 1 F says:
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    The only good thing about Stroman yesterday….It happened before my draft last night, cause i probably would have had him….Phew

      • JeF With 1 F says:
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        @Wake Up: Different League…but yeah took the auto draft fuck in that one…Last night i actually had a nice draft as opposed to coming home the night before to find out i need to redraft half my team from the wire.

    • bruuuuuce says:
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      In a keeper league, I tried to make a trade for Stroman Monday night but it fell through at the last minute. I was pissed that it didn’t work out…

      Bullet doged

      • JeF With 1 F says:
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        @bruuuuuce: I did the same thing in a Dynasty…he still would have value in that format but he should be a bit cheaper now.

    • Ra'zball Al Ghul says:
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      @JeF With 1 F: Next up on the surgery train… Tanaka

      • JeF With 1 F says:
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        @Grey: Word

  13. Ante GALIC says:
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    Grey,

    Awesome stuff indeed!!

    1.Two funny things about Stroman.

    A. He got the injury bunting;
    B. He’s going to visit Dr. Andrews for a second opinion.

    2. E5 is giving me serious heartburn. Gonna need seruous rolaids to make it through ST.

    Cheers,
    Ante

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Ante GALIC: Thanks! 1B. But of course 2. Ha

  14. Bryan says:
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    Grey, Im in a 11 man roto, I got 11&12 pick. Im thinking Jones,Rizzo and Rendon will be there,which 2 guys would u take at those picks?

    • EA says:
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      @Bryan: I like Jones and Rendon. Rendon over Rizzo because of his dual eligibility. Just my opinion, though.

  15. Rich says:
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    How could you JEF. You really are a piece of crap

    • JeF With 1 F says:
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      @Rich: Um….What?

      • Ante GALIC says:
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        @JeF With 1 F: Yeah, was wondering the same. The only question left is…What the F*CK, J*F?? What did you do? And when you find out what you did, please tell us how you could have done such a terrible thing? Also, desperately seeking your Factoids of the day. Pretty awesome stuff, man!

        Cheers,
        Ante

        • JeF With 1 F says:
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          @Ante GALIC: Ha yeah i have no clue what that was about….Facts are back opening day

      • Grey

        Grey says:
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        @JeF With 1 F: I think your ex might’ve found Razzball

        • JeF With 1 F says:
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          @Grey: Oh God No

          • Grey

            Grey says:
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            Haha

        • JeF With 1 F says:
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          @J-FOL: Yeah i missed nicks draft…was out and couldnt get it to load on my phone, that one was monday night…not Vins last night

          • Grey

            Grey says:
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            Already dating, huh? Nice!

            • JeF With 1 F says:
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              @Grey: I dont know what your talking about

              • Grey

                Grey says:
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                Haha

          • J-FOH says:
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            @JeF With 1 F: we know that, I was telling you why rich called you a piece

            • JeF With 1 F says:
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              @J-FOH: Ah ok…he put that post in a random spot

  16. As soon as you rank M Taylor, he retires…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Wake Up: Ha, yeah…Wrong one

    • J-FOL says:
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      @Wake Up: Mick Taylor?

      • Wake Up says:
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        @J-FOL: I like your tone, Walktapuss…

        • J-FOH says:
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          @Wake Up: Rhinosacertops?

  17. PK says:
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    I’m trying to picture Jose Reyes as a luchador: replace the Christian cross on Rey Mysterio’s mask and pants with a medical cross. We’re off to a good start.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @PK: Ha!

  18. bruuuuuce says:
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    I’m continually impressed. “Straight outta Cumpton” is straight gold.

    It’s gold, Jerry!

    [stands and applauds]

  19. S.H says:
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    Would you take Masterson and Lawrie or Lynn, thanks

    • JeF With 1 F says:
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      @S.H: Lawrie…would depend on need though for me…If Lawrie is expendable than Id rather have Lynn