This young Angels starter, Reid Detmers, isn’t also a great hitter so why do we care? In this 14,000 word essay, I will explain to you how Reid’s not Ohtani, but he is Okay-to-me! Okay-i, first-y thingy first-y, let’s read Reid, reed, read, Reid, read, reed–What’s wrong with you? Broken record-itis? Here’s what others before me have said on Reid Detmers, then I will rejoin you on the other side (it’s a lot, but what the heck, let’s do it). Here’s Prospect Hobbs from the top 10 college prospects to target in dynasty leagues, “Several players on this list would be ranked ahead of Reid Detmers if this were solely about upside, but it’s not. I’d be hard-pressed to tell you to pick up and hold a prospect not destined to reach the pro circuit for several years. So although many feel Detmers projects as a middle-of-the-rotation guy who sits around 90-94 MPH with his fastball, he has elite command and pitchability and should move more quickly through the minors than many of the arms that are drafted before him this June.” Side note from Grey, Hobbs was right that Detmers would move through the minors fast. Detmers debuted in the majors this past year to garbage results (7.40 ERA), but it was only 20 2/3 IP and he’s still 22 years old. So, what can we expect from Reid Detmers for 2022 fantasy baseball? Or, rather: Let’s get back to Hobbs!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Here’s Grayson Rodriguez, and we’ll pick up everything we know on the other side of feasting your peep-holes on him:

Especially like the pitch towards the end that the catcher can’t even get a glove on. That’s filth. That’s what an ace looks like in the minors. His minor league results: 23 GS, 2.36 ERA, 0.83 WHIP, 2.67 FIP, 40.5 K%, 6.8 BB%, 14.1 K/9, 161 K in 103 IP between High-A and Double-A. He won the Jim Palmer Award for the MILB Pitcher of the Year for the Orioles. They presented him with a pair of Jockey underwear. The bad news that I’m omitting here is–No, not that the Jockey underwear were previously worn. That I don’t know, but maybe they were since it’s the Orioles, which brings me to my problem that I omitted. This was the 2nd year that Grayson Rodriguez won the Orioles’ MILB Pitcher of the Year award, which is such a joke. The Orioles are cheap eh-eff. This kind of bee ess really needs to end, so I can stop spelling out cuss words. There should be zero incentive for a MLB team to keep a prospect in the minors if he’s ready. Grayson Rodriguez prolly could’ve had a season as good as Alek Manoah last year, but he’s throwing darts in the minors. So, what can we expect from Grayson Rodriguez for 2022 fantasy baseball?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Before we get into Shane Baz, feel free to comment with any rookies I haven’t covered yet, that you think might be relevant for 2022. I’m a redraft guy, first and foremost, so I won’t be covering guys who won’t be up until next year. Shizz happens, see my Sixto Sanchez fantasy from last offseason, but ideally we’re looking for redraft 2022 rookies. Okay, what I and others have said previously about Shane Baz, “The Rays decided to add some intrigue into the final two weeks of the season, calling up, Shane Baz who can touch 100 MPH. That’s miles per hour not the number of Moulin Rouges per hour you can watch when they’re on fast forward. That’s six. In Prospect Itch’s latest top 100 fantasy baseball prospects, he had Shane Baz coming in at 37th overall. As Prospector Geoff said a few years ago, “Baz is a fire-balling Texan with a varied stable of offerings. His fastball is a plus pitch featuring a velocity range between 91-98, with two plane movement. It’s a pitch he really has feel for, which is why the variance is so great with the pitch’s velocity. Baz’s pitchability and feel are truly impressive for a prep player. His ability to take something off, and reshape his pitches gives him two distinctive plus offerings in his high 80’s cutter and low-mid 80’s slider. He also features an average curveball, and a work in progress change that shows encouraging run. Baz’s talent is in good hands in the Pirates organization.” And I am laughing very loudly at that last part. Yes, the Pirates traded him to the Rays. Why? Because the Pirates know no (stutterer!) limits to their tanking.” And that’s me quoting me, Itch and Geoff! So, what can we expect from Shane Baz for 2022 fantasy baseball?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Unlike Riley Greene, Hunter Greene is an actual color. That color is not green, it’s red. Not just red for the Reds, which is the team he will eventually play for in the majors, but the red is also for fire, which is what he brings with his speed ball that can touch 103 MPH. Okay, before we do anything else, we need to see that:

*wipes drool from mouth* What were we saying? *falls off chair, sticks head up* Could you remind again what we were saying? *tumbles into a pile of leaves* Disembodied voice, “Could you remind me please?” Seriously, though: Yum. Hunter Greene doesn’t throw fastballs, he throws crapballs because that’s what the hitters say when they have to face him. It’s actually pretty amazing how easy that 103 MPH comes to him. He looks like he’s throwing with the effort of a guy darting in 92 MPH fastballs. Hunter Greene, which sounds like an option on a Ford Explorer interior, might be an actual robot. That arm action and the results are off the charts. And that’s after Tommy John surgery! Makes me think in fifty years everyone’s going to be throwing 125 MPH, except for Bartolo Colon Jr., who will be throwing a get-me-over 83. So, what can we expect from Hunter Greene for 2022 fantasy baseball?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Confession alert! I’m not the only one deciding who to write up for the fantasy baseball rookies. Prospect Itch is puppeteering me into writing about guys who he thinks will be making 2022 impacts. Let’s not discuss where Itch’s hand is to puppeteer me, but let’s just say it doesn’t itch, per se. Joe Ryan? Well, I might’ve wrote up Joe Ryan even if I were parasailing on my own down the cliffs of 2022 fantasy baseball rookies, looking for a place to land, but Itch is puppeteering–Hey, that’s my lower intestine, Itch. Yes, right there. Geez. Okay, first, let’s see what I’ve already said in The Hunt for No October starring Joe Ryan:

In a deep Scottish accent, the Twins’ Triple-A manager said, “You’re comin’ up tae join th’ club, Joe Ryan. Ur ye excited?”
Joe Ryan paused, then asked, “What are you saying?”
“Aam Sean Connery an’ aam daein’ a Scottish accent. Ur ye excited, certainly, Jack Ryan?”
He scratched his head, then, “Huh? Oh. My name’s Joe Ryan.”

So, Joe Ryan was called up to start on Wednesday, and I settled in to watch. He was one of the pieces the Rays sent to the Twins for Nelson Cruz. Since the Rays sent him away, I expect he’ll spontaneously combust during his next start or suddenly lose command of his pitches and return in 2022 as a middle infielder in Rookie Ball. If that doesn’t happen, we should all be super interested. I’m intrigued, y’all! He looks like every great command pitcher, who can also induce strikeouts. Prospect Itch said of Ryan, “I have high hopes for Joe Ryan, another dynasty trade target if you can get a decent price. His 30+ K-BB percentage across three levels in 2019 was pretty loud, but some of the clamor might’ve died down since Ryan was kept under training site wraps for all of 2020. His best trait is a true-spin four-seamer he can command across the zone, and that’s a great base from which to build an arsenal in today’s game. Tampa’s coaches have praised Ryan for his aptitude for new pitches and approaches, particularly his feel for spin. I get giddy just thinking about him and punching Grey.” Okay, not cool! Ryan continued to carve up hitters in Triple-A this year while maintaining elite command: 11.8 K/9, 1.6 BB/9 in 57 IP. This is potentially as good a prospect arm call-up as we’re getting the rest of the year.” And that’s me quoting me quoting Itch! So, what can we expect from Joe Ryan for 2022 fantasy baseball?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Here’s what A.J. Hinch said regarding Riley Greene and his teammate, who I just covered in my Spencer Torkelson fantasy, “It’s gonna be big drama, and you guys are gonna ask a lot, and I love that. I love the pressure on these guys. And then we’ll see where it takes us. I hope they put all kinds of pressure on us for Opening Day.” Trying not to lose my shizz that every prospect, who is ready, should be called up when they’re ready. The system is so broken when they look at guys and think, “He’s going to make it tough on us. We know he’s ready, but we also don’t want to pay him in the landmark case of sooner vs. later.” For me, I know a guy is ready when they rip up Triple-A, which Riley Greene did:  8/4/.308 in only 159 ABs. Tigers prospects to finally get excited about (with Spencer), huh? Gotta love it (that’s an order). Mean Gene Riley Greene’s 2022 is going to have a lot to do with how much the Tigers are playing Service Time Games, which sounds like a bad Chris Isaak song. (Are there good Chris Isaak songs? Don’t answer that.) And how well Greene does in the spring. If he has a 5/5/.400+ type spring, he might force his way into the Opening Day roster. It’s not like the Tigers have anyone else in front of him to stop him. Like Cuban regimes, they’re basically rotating in and out of Castros. Willi Castro here, Harold Castro there, neither Castro is any good. So, what can we expect from Riley Greene for 2022 fantasy baseball?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Up front, out of the way, Prospect Itch’s thoughts, “Spencer Torkelson is unique as a first overall pick in that it’s really just the bat Detroit drafted. They announced him as a third baseman on draft night, and Torkelson might be a good enough athlete to make that work, but it doesn’t matter all that much to his prospect stock if he has to slide back over to first base. The carrying tools are hit and power, and both could be plus-plus depending how he reacts to premium spin. The clear #1 pick in dynasty First-Year-Player Drafts and an easy top five prospect for fantasy. As good as he is, Grey is that bad.” Not cool, gonna move on! Spencer Torkelson is the meow’s cat; his stats tell me so: 30 HRs combined across three levels, ending in Triple-A, in his first competitive minor league season. His numbers strictly at Triple-A were: 11/1/.238 but with a .233 BABIP and a 20.3% strikeout rate. He was robbed, a lot it seems, i.e., that’s unlucky. Also, his walk rate was 13% — slashed .350/.531. These aren’t ordinary numbers from a kid who is just tasting Triple-A for the first time. What’s pretty cool, and I mean this in the most sincere, non-cynical way, there’s a ton of under-25-year-old guys coming up and you can already see future first and second rounders for fantasy all over the place. Is Spencer Torkelson? Meh, maybe in the right lineup, but he’s more Jose Abreu-lite than Au Shizz in his prime. Each time the league loses a guy, it gets replenished with a better guy. Going bye-bye from the 1st few rounds is Nolan Arenado. No fear, Mr. Belvedere sat on his nuts and missed a week of work, also Tork’s got you, man! It does make things fun. So, what can we expect from Spencer Torkelson for 2022 fantasy baseball?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

What others on Razzball have said about Adley Rutschman before I get to my thoughts: Here’s a quote from Prospect Hobbs’s piece on who he thinks will be the 2023 All-Stars at each position, “Adley Rutschman takes the cake at the catcher position for the 2023 All-Star Team because I honestly do expect him to be the best catcher in the game two-plus years from now. Rutschman slashed .254/.351/.423 with four homers (13 XHB), 26 RBI, 19 runs and one steal in his first 154 professional plate appearances in 2019 which he split across rookie-level, Low-A and Class-A. One steal. Damn that’s sexy. What’s sexier is the 27-to-20 strikeout-to-walk ratio seen in his first taste of the minors, translating to a 17.4 K% and 12.9 BB%. Rutsch-ell Crowe, as I like to call him, came out of college with a 60-grade hit tool and 60-power, so the sky is the limit here offensively from a positional perspective. Don’t expect Realmuto-esque steals with the 40-grade legs and one steal in 155 pro plate appearances, but he’s at the position to stay (true catcher) and could suck a whole lot less than what we’ve become accustomed to at the position from a fantasy perspective. Speaking of sucking, Grey sucks.” What the hell, my dude! This year in 123 games, Adley Rutschman went 23/3/.285 in 452 ABs. In Triple-A, the numbers were bolstered by a .364 BABIP, but were 5/2 in 157 ABs, and a slash of .312/.405/.490 with a 13% walk rate and 17.8% strikeout rate. Honestly, it’s criminal he hasn’t debuted yet for the Orioles. So, what can we expect from Adley Rutschman for 2022 fantasy baseball?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

It seems to me that the nature of the beast when discussing prospects is you get a lot of: Here’s what I said previously when he was supposed to be called up already. Unlike most prospects, Josh Jung wasn’t kept in the minors simply for service time reasons. Josh Jung was ticketed for the majors this past preseason until he hurt his foot. Jung, man, no need to be bruised. Here’s what Prospect Itch said previously, “The best Texas prospect since Gallo, Josh Jung brings full-field power, plate discipline, and a plus hit tool along with functional defense at the hot corner. I’m trying to acquire him in my 20-team OBP league and suggest anyone seeking potentially affordable third base help consider the same in their leagues. Speaking of affordable, anyone know a reasonably priced hitman to take out Grey?” Okay, that’s not cool. Hold on one second, are you telling me the Rangers have a decent prospect? I call BS. This is the Rangers just trying to sneak Michael Young back out at 3rd base, and spelling his name differently. Jung, you’re nothing but a Freud! Podcaster Geoff told me the other day, he thinks Jung is a 25-homer, 3-steal, .280 hitter. Oh, and if you were wondering, Josh Jung was eventually held down artificially last year after he returned from his 30-game injury. Artificially like my smile when I congratulate someone else for winning my fantasy league. “Congrats, way to avoid Cody Bellinger,” and the subtext is, “I would’ve won if not for Cody Bellinger.” A gracious loser, I am not. Show me a gracious loser and I’ll show you a loser! *tears shirt off and runs through a wall, casually returns by coming through the door* In 78 minor league games this past year (Double and Triple-A), Jung hit 19 HRs and .332. Giddy up, Texas Rangers! So, what can we expect from Josh Jung for 2022 fantasy baseball?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

So, I gave you a Jose Miranda 2022 fantasy post kinda already, when I told you how much I liked him towards the tail-end of last year, while thinking he was about to be promoted. Ended up I got goosed, and Miranda got service time jag-offed and wasn’t brought up. I didn’t tell you everything, so we’re back. What I did say, “Jose Miranda as played by Cynthia Nixon in her most challenging role yet: Minnesota Twins prospect. The sun sets through the West Village window, as clickety-clack from Carrie’s word processor is heard. She reads the words out loud as they make their way onto her 64-bit screen, “Miranda wasn’t going to come, so to speak, up for the Twins until they were good and ready. With Josh Donaldson out of the picture–Wait, is Josh out of the picture?–Gosh, Miranda really needs to find a new position, so to speak, to play in. Maybe Miranda can get in, so to speak, some time at 2nd base, like Samantha after five minutes knowing a guy.” And that’s me quoting Carrie Bradshaw! Jose Miranda has no speed, but his bat is more than ready, and it is explosive. Possesses the usual Twins’ tendencies — Twindencies? — he doesn’t strike out at all and doesn’t walk a ton. Are the Twins developing prospects or just cloning a Luis Arraez who was dipped in amber? Developing, because Miranda actually has power, unlike most Twins prospects. As Prospect Itch said recently, “Minnesota has demonstrated an appreciation for precisely this sort of profile, and Miranda is a better all-around hitter than some of the other guys from the past few years (Astudillo, Sano, Rooker). And much better than Grey, who sucks.” Okay, that’s hurtful. “I know just the slot for him,” says Samantha as Miranda groans.” And that’s me quoting me quoting Carrie Bradshaw and Prospect Itch! A person quoting a fake Carrie Bradshaw quote on a fantasy baseball website is something you prolly read so much, huh? So, what can we expect from Jose Miranda for 2022 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Love that Oneil Cruz ended the year with the Pirates. Maybe this is a banana in the ol’ tailpipe. Or rather a banana in the booty hole. Booty as in treasure stolen by Pirates and put in a “hole” in a lower deck–Ya know what? No need to explain, everyone says booty hole with only one thing in mind. A pirate ship’s lower deck for treasure, where the peg boys hang out. So, maybe this banana in the booty hole will come back to haunt me like a ghost ship that has lots of booties with bananas, but my expectations have been raised by him being promoted in the final weekend of last season, whether that’s good or not, we shall see. Break camp, not wind when the booty hole and bananas are on the line, as I always say. Any hoo! Here’s a fun one to watch:

Oneil Cruz had no business hitting that ball out. What’s that, a flip of the wrist in one of baseball’s worst parks? He’s a shortstop with 80-grade power? Oh…*climbs up a stack of phone books until one reaches the moon*…kay. So, what can we expect from Oneil Cruz for 2021 fantasy baseball?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Prospect Itch’s fantasy baseball top 100 prospects has Julio Rodriguez as numero uno. The big mahoof. The head honcho. The ying and yang. The sun, moon and stars. Here’s what Itch said, “A thunderous power bat with a knack for going the other way. Concerns exist about his ability to handle elite chase pitches on the outer half, and while that’s true of just about every young hitter, J-Rod’s first move in the box is a slight drift toward third base, and his front leg moves that direction, as well. He’s adept at slashing or driving the ball to the opposite field, so I suspect this could be just an aesthetic thing because sometimes the greats just look different and force us to retrain our eyes a little. Might wind up a double plus in hit, and power with just enough athleticism to chip in on the base paths. If only I could ‘double-hit’ Grey’s head.” C’mon, man! Jul-Rod, which sounds like a vaping product, went 13/21 across High-A and Double-A Arkansas in 74 games with a slash line of .347/.441/.560, which is kinda hilarious. His top exit velocity was 117.4 MPH. That’s Vlad Jr.-type top exit velocity, i.e., a top 10 MLB exit velocity. If you’re wondering where he was and why he only saw 74 games, he was leading his Dominican Republic Olympic baseball team to a bronze. During his Olympic experience, he hit .417 and got to find out if inside the metal is white or dark chocolate. *intern whispers in ear* There’s no chocolate? That’s a bummer to hear. I hope Jul-Rod didn’t crack a tooth. So, what can we expect from Julio Rodriguez for 2022 fantasy baseball?

Please, blog, may I have some more?