We’re gonna try something different today. We’re not going to talk about a lot of extraneous shizz. We’re gonna talk about Yordano Ventura. We’re not going to talk about Ruben Studdard on The Biggest Loser and how his rolls have rolls while wishing he had a Rolls. We’re not going to talk about the newest season of The Voice and how Christina’s coaching style is to sing the songs better than the singtestants, how Blake and C. Lo can’t sing worth a lick and how Adam just purses his lips like Zoolander. We’re not going to talk about the new Drake album and how I’ve listened to it on repeat for the last three weeks. The Language is my jammie jam! No, we’re not going to talk about any of that. We’re especially not gonna talk about how I’m getting married tomorrow. HOLY EFFIN EFF ARE WE NOT GOING TO TALK ABOUT THAT! Can we never talk about that? Is it too late to run off to Miami and be with Giancarlo forever and ever amen? We’re not gonna talk about any of that. We’re going to talk about Yordano Ventura or YoVe, which sounds like a black Jew kvetching. “Do you have to throw the no-look pass so hard? YoVe!” Did you know Sammy Davis Jr.’s favorite expression was YoVe? Of course, you didn’t know that because I just made it up. So, with all of that said about Yordano Ventura, what can we expect from him for 2014 fantasy baseball?
Please, blog, may I have some more?