I almost began this by calling each of you a cotton-headed ninny muggins. For those of you still paying attention, and still in contention, I wasn't speaking to you. Trust me, this isn't a jab to the heart of your fantasy fandom, but rather a jab to the heart of those dad blam stats I extract every. single. effing. week. Haha, yes, they're what carry this article, outside of these little intro words that a grand total of four three of you read, and they matter greatly when determining which starters should get the nod in the two-start realm. But...this week, and maybe others in September, some of the numbers may not add up to the prettiest math on paper. And I just may get salty if you say the numbers next to the name I'm bout to highlight does over the next seven days. So, deep breath. No need to name call. We can keep it rockin' and ready to rage like when the song in the gif above hits the radio. And by the radio, I of course mean the loudspeakers in a baseball stadium in between innings with some annoying dancer and the team's baseball girls doing a country jig. Which name? Ol' Cotton Eye Jha.


