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Today, it’s time for the top 60 starters for 2015 fantasy baseball, but, first, let’s jump in the world’s worst time machine and go back to this past Tuesday morning when Rudy released the Steamer Hitter/Pitcher projections along with the fantasy auction values for every conceivable league.  If you go to the ESPN 12 team auction values (or any page from the menu on that auction value page), you’ll see little boxes above each column.  Go to the POS box and type in SP.  Frank Voila!  Now it’s just listing pitchers (you can sort for whatever you want in the top boxes).  Now click on the $/G box.  It should turn black.  You are now sorting by the dollars expected to earn per game for starters.  If you click on the $K column, you are now sorting by who is expected to rack up the most Ks.  So on and so forth.  All of my 2015 fantasy baseball rankings are there.  As always, my tiers and projections are included.  Anyway, here’s the top 60 starters for 2015 fantasy baseball:

41. Gio Gonzalez – (See top 40 starters for 2015 fantasy baseball for previous tiers.) This is a new tier.  This tier goes from here until Quintana.  I call this tier, “You can see these guys are a bad mother– Shut yo’ mouth!”  This tier is made of guys that were shafted.  They prolly all should be ranked higher than they are, but for one reason or another, they ended up here.  As for Gio, I fully expected to dislike him this year.  I could’ve sworn he was terrible last year.  I remembered things differently than they were.  Kinda like how you have fond memories of high school.  Skidmark wasn’t a nickname of endearment, and Gio wasn’t bad last year.  He was injured, and missed a month.  The first time that happened in his career.  He is now 29 years old, and I don’t expect him to Benjamin Button himself to 28 years old, but his stuff and rates were pretty much on par with past seasons.  2015 Projections:  14-10/3.46/1.25/186

42. James Shields – As of right now, he still hasn’t signed with a team.  Maybe Scott Boras should remove the stipulation from the signing team that they need to give Shields an alpaca farm where the alpacas poop hundred dollar bills.  Everyone knows only Larry Ellison has those alpacas!  If Shields goes to the Padres, I could see getting slightly more excited about Shields, but as of right now he’s coming off his 2nd straight year where his K-rate has fallen, and he’s about a K away from being Henderson AlvarezUPDATE:  The Padres signed Shields for $75 million, which points out the error in my pre-signing blurb, Boras was obviously not his agent.  Boras once got $75 million for a sportswear mannequin that was wanted in the dress suit section of a Macy’s.  Well, that’s the Hudson under the Tappan Zee.  Shields gets a boost in value by being in Petco vs. weaker offenses.  His falling K-rate is a red flag, but his velocity has been fine and I could see a small bounce back in Ks.  That’s likely a moot point since he’ll prolly be drafted prior to this spot due to name value and drafters getting excited about the Padres, in general.  Tell me you thought I’d ever write that about the Padres.  2015 Projections:  13-10/3.42/1.18/181

43. Lance Lynn –  I waffled on Lynn a bit with whether I wanted to draft him or not.  First, I had him in the above tier, then in the below tier, then I landed him here.  I hate waffling.  Unless I’m blueberry waffling.  He generates swings outside the strike zone at a below league average clip, and his swinging strike rate is 8.4, which is also below league average.  Last year, he had a 2.74 ERA, but that was driven by a high LOB% and a low (for him) BABIP.  He’ll likely have a 4+ ERA month as he always seems to have, end up on waivers and get touted by me to pick him up, but draft him?  Some days I like Lynn, other days not likely(nn).  2015 Projections: 14-10/3.60/1.28/186

44. Garrett Richards – I had a note next to his name that said, “Check knee,” which I promptly did, so that makes me a Chechnya Russian. *high fives self*  Ow, my hand!  I could see dropping Richards to around the 120th overall starter slot if he has a setback in camp to moving him up into the top 40 starters if he’s locked into a rotation role out of camp.  My money is on he’s not ready to start the season, but is pegged to return mid-April and I just draft him around this slot, which is why I ranked him here.  2015 Projections:  10-6/3.39/1.21/155 in 170 IP

45. Jake Peavy – Here’s what I said this offseason, “Re-signed with the Giants.  After Bumgarner, to find a Giants starter in San Fran, all you need to do is find a hill and go over it.  Peavy’s been a Hall of Fame pitcher in the NL West and barely major league ready in the American League.  In NL West parks, he has a lifetime 3.20 ERA in 1092 IP.  In 726 1/3 IP in the AL, he has a 4.20 ERA.  He’ll likely be someone most drafters don’t give much mind to, but in deeper leagues Peavy-type draft picks can help you win your league.”  And that’s me quoting me!  2015 Projections: 12-8/3.57/1.22/152

46. Jose Quintana – I love the Hispanics.  Just the other day I did get in an argument with my man maid, Gilmer.  It was Cougs’ birthday and I hadn’t gotten her flowers.  She was out, and Gilmer kept guilting me.  I’d say, “No moleste,” and he’d say, “You have to get Ms. Grey flores,” and we went back and forth for about ten minutes until I went, but Gilmer was right and we are now good.  I’d even say our relationship has gone to a new level.  He’s almost like a mentor to me that also cleans my underwear.  I say all of this because Quintana should likely be higher.  I’m not sure why I don’t like him that much.  He had a 3.32 ERA with a 3.37 xFIP, so there wasn’t a whole lot of luck.  His K-rate was 8 and walk rate was 2.3.  His K-rate went up from his previous years significantly.  His velocity stayed around the same at 91.6 MPH, which is not elite.  That velocity tells me a mid-7-ish K-rate is more likely without something else.  I see he threw his curve a shizzton.  Almost 25% of the time.  Look at his swinging strike rates on his curve and fastball.  Yup, the curve was the reason for his success.  Opponents hit .184 against the curve (.295 vs. the fastball).  Then, I looked at league context.  He throws the curve the 7th most in the league.  Summation, he has one dazzling breaking pitch and good control.  To me, that’s a guy that can be as successful as last year, not much more, and needs to walk a fine line, because if he loses the feel for his best pitch, he’s unusable.  Why he’s worse than Smyly?  I have no idea.  Maybe Gilmer knows.  2015 Projections: 13-9/3.51/1.26/175

47. Jered Weaver – This is a new tier.  This tier goes from here until Odorizzi.  I call this tier, “I just felt like I needed to break up all the pitchers I liked with a crap tier so here we are.”  As for Weaver, you know the carpet store near you that has been going out of business for the last seven years?  You keep passing by and thinking at some point you’ll get a carpet because they really will go out of business eventually.  Then, when you finally get the cash together to buy one, they are out of business.  That’s Jered Weaver.  At some point, he will pull the rug out from underneath you.  2015 Projections: 12-10/3.75/1.26/151

48. Alex Cobb – Hmm, maybe I should’ve named this tier, “If they pitch 200 IP, they will be an easy number one starter.”  Unlike Cole and Hamels or Gerrit and Cole or– forget it!  Unlike the two previous guys, Cobb hasn’t had arm-related injuries that have sidelined him the past two years.  He got beaned on the coconut one year and an oblique strain last year.  In 166 1/3 IP in 2014, he still had a 2.87 ERA, a 8.1 K/9 and a 2.5 BB/9.  I don’t foresee huge jumps in any of those stats, but, if he just maintains the torso, he’s a number one.  UPDATE:  Cobb is going to miss time due to forearm tightness, which is code for Dr. James Andrews is about to get a new Lambo with suicide doors.  2015 Projections:  9-8/3.67/1.18/139 in 160 IP

49. Hyun-Jin Ryu – He’s about the best value you’re gonna find for a number two starter.  Last year, he had a 8.2 K/9 and a 1.7 BB/9.  Those are elite numbers.  He’ll only be 28 years old (unless you’re reading this in two years, then he’s much older and you’re reading an old post).  From 2013 to 2014, he actually got much better, and we can’t be sure that we’ve seen his peak.  Oh, and the Dodgers could win 110 games.  I don’t hand out lots of wins in projections because of their unpredictability, but it’s worth noting that my 14 wins projections could become 18 wins pretty easily.  Ryu intrigued?  Ryu and me both.  UPDATE:  Ryu experiencing pain.  Not a question, though I appreciate hearing about your bunions.  2015 Projections:  10-6/3.59/1.23/132

50. Cliff Lee – I was going to say, “You don’t think pitchers can fall this far off the map then go looking for Lincecum in the top 100,” but that allusion doesn’t hold true.  It is an allusion too, not a trick.  Lincecum has other things to fry besides eroding skills, age and his brain.  The Adverb hasn’t lost his control, which makes him a tad less scary for downside and the NL East, which could cure most ills (see Bartolo for further reference).  The Adverb will still be 37 in August and he’s coming off elbow issues that he refused surgery for.  He could be fine, but he won’t be on any of my teams to find out.  UPDATE:  All the pitchers I wanted to avoid are being sidelined in the spring, which reminds me, I want to draft all my teams in January.  The Adverb may or may not be done, but I wouldn’t draft him anywhere.  2015 Projections:  11-9/3.78/1.27/130

51. Dallas Keuchel – His 2.93 ERA last year was predicated mostly on ground balls.  Ground balls are fine, but they’re not safe to count on every year.  Or “Bleh!” as The Count would say.  They’re not as safe as a 96 MPH fastball.  Last year, Keuchel had 89 MPH stuff, and the league’s best ground ball rate (63.5%).  His career rate is 58.4%, and his previous high was 55.8%.  Ground balls are susceptible to luck.  If a ball bounces through, there’s nothing the pitcher can do.  In 2013, lots of balls bounced through and Keuchel had a 5.15 ERA.  Keuchel can be useful or better, but it’s gonna come down to, er, being down with his pitches.  2015 Projections:  11-12/3.81/1.27/140

52. Jake Odorizzi – Most of the guys in this tier have seen better days or their best days, but Odorizzi’s better days could be yet to come.  Still, I don’t trust him, not yet at least.  His K-rate was exceptional last year (9.1 K/9), but his velocity (90 MPH fastball) isn’t and neither is his control (3.2 BB/9).  He reads to me a little like Dan Straily.  Odorizzi’s younger, has a bit better stuff… Okay, I don’t even know what made me compare him to Straily.  Odorizzi looks and feels to me like a 7.7 to 8.4 K/9 and a 2.7 BB/9 and 3.3 BB/9.  So, if you draft him and get 8.4 K/9 with a 2.7 BB/9, you’re set like you thought you were the day you graduated from college.  If you get 7.7 K/9 and 3.3 BB/9, you’re five years out of college and wondering if you need another degree.  2015 Projections: 10-14/3.83/1.30/181

53. Andrew Cashner – This is a new tier.  This tier goes from here until Eovaldi.  I call this tier, “Bridge Building 101.”  Imagine you’re building a bridge.  This is your first bridge, and you had to glad-hand some pretty important people to even get the contract.  You start the bridge and everyone is caca-cuckoo with possibilities.  People are saying you’re a visionary.  You might be the Frank Lloyd Wright of bridges.  Of course, the only thing you know about bridges is what you read in an eHow article on how to build a bridge.  But somehow, someway, it’s coming together.  You can’t believe it yourself.  Thing is, anyone can start building a bridge.  You’re on dry land.  You can stand.  The end is the same, only when you get to the end, you’re also excited to be finished.  The middle is the pain in the ass.  Guys and four girl readers, we’re in a tier of guys I’d draft to float the middle of my staff.  There’s no safe, steady ground here, you just need to get through it.  As for Cashner, he’s 28 years old and has still yet to throw a complete season.  He also has two straight years of an under 7 K/9.  He lost three miles off his fastball from 2012.  (I swear this will get good soon.)  No fear, parenthetical, it’s all good now.  He pitches in Petco and his career ERA is 3.25 in 409 2/3 IP.  Don’t expect more than 150 IP, but it should be a good 150 IP from a ratio standpoint.  2015 Projections:  9-10/3.11/1.18/117

54. Ervin Santana – This offseason, I said, “(Ervin) signed with the Twins.  There’s an old chap in Minnesota who heard Ervin’s headed to his great state, and briefly thought his 60-year dream of the Minneapolis Lakers returning has finally been answered.  Note to free agent pitchers:  if you have to go to the AL, may as well be to pitch your home games in Hubert H. Homerfree Retrodome.  Though, that’s only accurate per the strictest sense of knocking down homers.  The Retrodome has played well for BABIP and runs of late.  Either way, Ervin just pitched in the AL Central in 2013 and had a 3.24 ERA, so he’s capable of being a number three fantasy starter.”  And that’s me quoting me! UPDATE: Busted for PEDs and won’t be around until the 2nd half of the season.  Too bad Salazar and Fiers didn’t have this happen with their history of 2nd half dominance.    2015 Projections:  12-10/3.58/1.27/168

55. Shelby Miller – Here’s what I said this offseason, “Okay, I didn’t like (Shelby) this past year, but he’ll probably be a 2.75 ERA pitcher on the Braves.  I’m only slightly exaggerating when I say the NL East has two hitters in the entire division to fear:  Stanton and Harper.  And last year it was only Stanton.  Doug Fister had a 2.41 ERA last year, and he only struck out 98 batters in 164 IP.  That’s egregious, Jackie Chiles.  I’m not a huge Miller fan due to the lack of Ks (6.25 K/9 last year), and his walk rate (3.59).  However, he did pitch terrifically in September if you’re into small sample sizes — That’s what she said! Huh? — with a 1.48 BB/9 in September.  If he can hold that walk rate for 2015, he’s a top 30 pitcher next year.  I have my doubts about going that far, but I still think he gains value with this move.”  And that’s me copying and pasting me! 2015 Projections: 12-9/3.52/1.23/152

56. Wily Peralta – He couldn’t jazz me enough to move him into a nom nom nom tier, but he also has me relatively excited, which is odd since he has back-to-back seasons of yawnstipating K-rates (6.3 K/9 in 2013; 7 K/9 in 2014).  He throws fast (95.8 MPH fastball, third fastest in the majors for starters), he’s only 25, has decent control and his Ks, while not amazing, are going in the right direction.  What’s not to like?  Well, he struggles vs. lefties, and gives up homers, especially at home.  Miller Park seems to bring out his alter ego, Wily Nilly.  I’ll be taking a chance on him in some leagues, but I’d keep expectations in the Czech Republic.  2015 Projections:  12-12/3.68/1.28/162

57. A.J. Burnett – Here’s hoping he waits until July to start talking about retirement.  2015 Projections:  12-13/3.87/1.31/182

58. Nathan Eovaldi – Here’s what I said this offseason, “A fast fastball does not make a pitcher (though it makes you sound like a stutterer).  In 199 2/3 IP last year, Eovaldi averaged a 95.5 MPH, which was the fourth fastest fastball on average for all starters.  Number one was Garrett Richards, then Yordano Ventura, then Wily Peralta, and Stephen Strasburg came in right after Eovaldi.  Each have their own peccadilloes, but I’d target any of them if they were all healthy (that’s a nod to Richards), even the unsexy Peralta had a 3.53 ERA last year.  Last year, Eovaldi had a 3.37 FIP and 3.78 xFIP due to a poor BABIP and a tad unlucky LOB%.  That means, all things being equal, Eovaldi should’ve had an ERA in the high threes.  So, right there, he’s already better than the 4.37 ERA from last year.  The other issue with him is the 6.40 K/9.  It’s not terrific.  He did have moments in the low minors where he had a 8+ K/9, and you’d think with his velocity he’d be able to get more swings and misses.  Well, I’d think it, at least.  He doesn’t get many hitters to chase pitches outside the strike zone (66th worst last year for qualified starters), and his swing and miss percentage isn’t much better (8.4%, good for about 53rd worst).  These actually moved up from 2013.  Something else that moved up dramatically?  Ew, gross, get your hands out of your pants!  What also progressed was his walk rate.  Last year, he had a 1.9 BB/9.  That is 22nd best in the majors, and the only pitchers he really matches up with velocity and control are Strasburg and Jeff Samardzija.  This is common sense, but when you throw the ball fast and can control it good things can and should happen, i.e., you can put the ball where hitters can’t hit it.  Oh, and we don’t have to worry about him only throwing a partial season.  He’s 24 years old and he just came off a 200 IP season.  One little step forward and Eovaldi becomes a top 40 starter and everyone wishes they had him.  The fantastic thing about him, he’s going to be as cheap as the oregano you pawned off as marijuana to your friends in high school.”  And that’s me– Well, you know the drill.  2015 Projections:  10-8/3.73/1.31/148

59. Rick Porcello – This is a new tier.  This tier goes from here until the top 80 starters for 2015 fantasy baseball.  I call this tier, “Guys that I don’t like that I end up unintentionally endorsing because others dislike them even more.” For some reason, year in and year out, another clunky opening to a sentence, other ‘perts seem to hate the guys in this tier more than me, and I don’t even like them all that much.  This tier could be summed up with a sideways emoticon giving the middle finger to a glass of Merlot.  If you come up to this tier and want to skip it, I won’t hate, but I also won’t congratulate.  I’m a poet and aware of it!  As for Porcello, this offseason, I said, “(He was) traded to the Sawx.  The Red Sox are going for quantity of starters over quality this offseason.  Next thing you know they’ll make an offer for Bartolo.  You can’t find more quantity than Bartolo.  In Fenway, Porcello has a lifetime 6.41 ERA.  Sawx fans, you are now contenders.  Why even play the games?!  Seriously, put the crown that was once worn by Babe Ruth on your head and prance through Faneuil Hall in your gotchies.  I’m just joshing.  That ERA was only in 19 2/3 IP and doesn’t mean anything.  Porcello had the 20th lowest fly ball rate, and regularly induces ground balls.  He should be able to handle Fenway about as well as he handled Comerica….Where he had a lifetime ERA of 4.58 in 529 IP!  Let’s name him the World Series MVP right now, Sox fans!  You got this thing in the bag!  Porcello should be a serviceable fifth fantasy starter for mixed leagues in matchups, but I’m not a huge fan.”  And that’s me quoting me!  2015 Projections:  14-8/3.91/1.29/121

60. Homer Bailey – As for Bailey, member how high I ranked him last year?  You don’t remember?  That’s great!  It’s for the better.  You’ll be easier to hypnotize with my mustache.  2015 Projections:  10-12/3.58/1.22/159